Luana526

My surgery was September 26. Looking back (even though it's very recent), I can honestly say that the the biggest adjustment comes when you are given freedom to eat solid foods. What a challenge! When the diet was dicated to me (liquids, then soft solids, etc.) I ate from the list and that was that. But when you begin to explore what works for you and what doesn't (as far as the permanent diet), that's when the real adjustment comes in. And those first few weeks after begin given that freedom I had a few episodes where I either ate too much at once, too fast, or didn't chew well enough (good news: it's so unpleasant, you'll be sure to only do that ONCE!). But here I am 47 and a half pounds down and I am so deliriously happy. And I have a very unusual frame/body, apparently, because I lost close to 30 pounds before people even started to notice. I lose it all over, very evenly. I'm down one size (although ready to go into next size), but I'm okay with that. It really comes from all over on me--my rings are big, I'm even sliding around in my shoes. I have two friends who are ready to take the plunge because they see my success and like me, they've tried just about everything. They are both post-menopausal and the weight just wants to stay put. I know, I was there. It's a little bit of a challenge getting in my Protein, although God knows I concentrate all day long on doing that. I find that some of my tastes have changed a bit. I never had a "sweet tooth" before, and now I have even less of a tolerance for sweets. So getting down a Protein Bar or shake is literally an all-day task for me. I'm trying to finish a protein bar right now that I started yesterday. I take a bite here and a bite there. You know what the best part about this whole journey is? Besides that I feel fantastic and I'm so happy I did this, the best part is not having that old love/hate relationship with food. I can be around it, have it in the house, go to parties, and never, ever fear that I'm going to overeat and hate myself afterwards. Aside from concentrating on the protein, I can honestly say I eat what I want and when I want and I have been losing consistently. I make better choice now, because who wants to go through all this and then eat junk food? Even then, I am very, very cognizant of the fact that I am eating a fraction of what I would eat before. I would encourage anyone considering the sleeve: it will be the best gift you will ever give yourself. I am enjoying life in a whole new way. Good luck!!

Thanks for the suggestions! I just bought some unflavored protein. I'm going to add it to my fruit/spinach shake in the morning. Happy New Year, everyone!!

I didn't choose that font! You're right--it's hard to read. I'm going to change that. Thanks!!

Thanks, Kimpossible. I may have turned the corner ever so slightly just since writing that. I need to hear that it gets better. All good to know! Thanks!

I really hate when people come on here just to say "stop whining!" The purpose of these particular forums is to compare experiences with others so you don't feel alone. If what we're talking about doesn't refer to you, it's really best to keep your laughing and bitch slapping fantasies to yourself. It absolutely doesn't serve any purpose.

Finally! Now I feel comfortable venting because I know there are others out there like me! When I went to the informational meeting back in July, there were five or six people in front of the room speaking about their experiences. They were at various stages of post-op and all had either lap band, sleeve, or bypass. They were all deliriously happy--almost like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" happy. As people were asking questions, I raised my hand and explained that I have two good friends who have had gastric bypass and I had just finished a "girls weekend" with the both of them and for two days I watched them pushing food away, most of the time in disgust. I said, "I want the surgery and I want to be successful, but I don't want to loathe food." Oh, you won't, you won't, I was assured. Today I am six weeks post-op and I have lost 31.5 pounds, including the 14 pounds pre-op. When I was on liquids, I actually had an appetite. I was a little scared because I had read a lot on here of people saying their appetites disappeared. Well, fast forward to where I am now and I find myself repulsed by virtually all foods. And I didn't want this! Everybody made it sound like "you just won't be able to eat as much." There are the usual "suck it up" and "this is what you signed up for" responses on here, but that doesn't help because this isn't what I signed up for. I specifically asked the group of people during the informational meeting if loathing food was going to be a possibility. I didn't weigh 218 pounds because I simply loved food. I weighed 218 pounds because I ate too much of the wrong foods coupled with very little exercise. Furthermore, it would have been nice if someone had been honest about what that "full" feeling really feels like. It's not a "Thanksgiving full/satisfied" kind of feeling. It's something totally foreign (very hard to describe) and very unpleasant. Not because I'm eating too fast or too much or not chewing enough. It's just being at that stomach capacity and feeling even more repulsed by food. I'm actually shocked my weight isn't coming off faster because there are days I'm lucky to take in 700 calories. I asked several people who had already had the surgery, "Am I going to go into a restaurant and look like a freak because I can't eat?" Noooooo, I was told. So last week my husband and I went out to a very fancy restaurant (no kids was the best part!) for our anniversary and he ordered baked clams as an appetizer and I had not even a whole one. When my salmon came, all I could get down was a tiny forkful. The waiter came up to me twice to ask if everything was okay and I finally said, "I guess I wasn't as hungry as I thought. Could you just wrap it?" So he did that and I spent the rest of the time watching my husband eat. I never went crazy in restaurants (almost always brought a doggie bag home--I'm more of a grazer) but I sat there thinking, "This is exactly what I didn't want to happen." Lesson learned: don't take a bite of anything if you want to even remotely enjoy your dinner. Two days before my surgery I sat down for a few hours with a friend who was 10 months post-op from the sleeve (and looks fantastic, by the way) and he mentioned that he and his wife were going to a friend's house for Pasta dinner that night and he was going to bring a Protein bar and have that. I said, "Can't you just eat a meatball??" I wouldn't like that kind of attention drawn to myself but apparently it doesn't bother some people. My best friend is one of the bypass gals I had the girls weekend with and she said, "You'll find that you're just satisified with a lot less." I told her the other day that I would not use "satisfied" as a word to describe what I feel when I'm done eating. When a waiter has to box up my entire dinner so I can eat a tiny portion of it the next day . . . well, "satisfying" doesn't jump out at me. It was more frustrating than anything. All in all, I am happy I had the surgery and I love losing the weight and knowing I'm never going to see those numbers again on the scale. But I don't feel that anybody prepared me for the downside of any of this. A few people said their tastes changed dramatically and I hate, hate, hate the fact that I can't sit down and enjoy my morning coffee any longer. It has no attraction to me whatsoever. You might as well put a cup of urine in front of me. I tried a sip of wine the other day and it had even less attraction to me, and I used to enjoy a glass with my husband after the kids went to bed. It's not going to kill me not to have wine, but I didn't want it to repulse me the way it does. And I'm sad that I can't sit and enjoy a cup of coffee with someone. "Hey, let's go grab a cup of coffee" just doesn't give me a tingle any more, and I miss that. I now know that post-op means you will be a very different person afterwards in so many ways and since I'm only six weeks post-op, this is just going to take time and getting used to. There are a lot of changes to deal with. Not the least is which that I'm not used to spending this much time eating! It takes me over an hour to eat a protein bar! Right now I can barely get anything down, and that unfortunately includes the chewable Vitamins. Anything remotely sweet makes me want to gag. I am seeing the doctor next week and we're going to have to put our heads together to come up with a plan because I need an alternative to those disgusting vitamins. And don't even get me started on how nauseating the shakes are! I manage to make my own shakes with fresh fruit and a scoop of unflavored protein in the blender, but the chocolate and vanilla shakes--so done with those. Oh, and here's something I never expected: I cannot--absolutely cannot--drink plain Water. Must, must, must be flavored with something. Plain water disgusts me. Whew! So glad I could vent. Please save your breath with the "you signed up for this" because nobody--nobody --was honest enough to tell a lot of what I'm feeling (including all the psych visits I had before surgery), and I'm obviously not alone. While I still would have had the surgery and technically have no regrets, I would have preferred to be a little more prepared for all these new (and sometimes unpleasant) feelings. As with anything, it boils down to how badly you want the rewards. There are plenty, but there are sacrifices, most of which probably just take getting used to. Someone recently asked me about the whole experience and I said I'm very happy to be losing weight and glad I did it but the whole process, in my opinion, is not for the fainthearted.

I have read hundreds and hundreds of posts on here both before and after my surgery. I have read about the stalls. Of course it's bound to happen. I wonder when it will happen to me, I thought. After reading so many posts, I've gathered that everyone loses a lot of weight that first month (one woman was near tears because she only lost 22 pounds the first month!). "Oh, goody!," I thought. "I'll get to see the fruits of my labor right away!" Wrong. I am four weeks post op today, and I've lost 14 pounds since surgery--and all but two pounds were from the first week! I've lost one pound in the last three weeks. I don't even want to get on the scale because it's too depressing. I had this surgery as a last resort because ever since I hit menopause, the weight simply would not come off, no matter how much I exercised and how closely I followed a weight loss plan. Even Weight Watchers stopped working for me despite accounting for every bite and every point. Before surgery, I told the psychologist that my only fear was that I would be the one patient out of a thousand that simply was not going to lose weight. I'd be the anamoly . . . I pictured the doctor shaking his head and saying, "I just don't know why it's not working for you." And here I am. I'm following everything they've told me: eating Protein, drinking protein, drinking Water, walking my treadmill. After all that, I lose one stinking pound in three weeks?? I'm eating 1/100th of what I was eating in a day. How is the scale not moving? How am I stuck at the same weight for three weeks? And if I'm stuck here, how on earth am I ever going to reach my goal? I can't even break 190! And before you tell me all about the shock that my body is in, how it thinks I'm starving, etc., I've had several close friends over the years with eating disorders and starvation seemed to make them waste away. The only thing my body should be doing is shedding pounds. I'm so disgusted. I can't even throw in the towel and say, "Screw this! I'm going to eat half a pizza!" because I can't eat more than two bites of anything! Hence, the venting. No need to post about what a whiner I am. I already know it. I just needed to vent. It's in place of that pizza, you understand.

Thanks, everyone, for the great responses. I will keep all these words of wisdom in mind while on my journey! P.S. Yes, I lost waaay less weight on Weight Watchers, but the reason why I chose bariatric surgery is precisely because the other methods weren't working. So, yeah, I have high expectations. But as someone put it, once that weight is loss, it's not coming back. I know I have to concentrate on the direction of the scale, however slow it's moving.

Thanks, Ava. I appreciate the kind words. It does help. I'm just baffled and frustrated. And scared. You have had trememdous success, I see. Kudos to you! I hope to follow suit . . . P.S. I have FitBit, too . . . love it!

I'm sure you're going to hear from a lot of people how FANTASTIC you look but I also understand that it's about how you feel. But on that note, wow! The last picture of you and your husband (you're in the black and white outfit) is really something! I'm 19 days post-op and I can't WAIT to look like you! But, again, I understand where you're coming from. We all went into this with an image of what we think we're going to look like. If it's any consolation at all, you do look great and you and your (very cute!) husband make an adorable couple!

The "final straw" is actually a build-up of years of self-loathing. Harsh, I know, but a lot of you know that feeling of self-disgust. This past summer I turned down an invitation to my 35th high school reunion--and I really wanted to see a lot of the people there! Then--and here comes one of the many straws--a dear friend who had gastric bypass surgery got down to a SIZE SIX and looks unbelievable!! She started out at 420 pounds and I thought, hell, if she can do it, so can I! She's been a big inspiration for me. I also had to accept that it was going to take something drastic because everything else I've tried over the years has either fallen flat or resulted in gaining back the weight. I just got sick of it. I want to wear nice clothing! Oh, and yesterday I was dizzy and lightheaded (surgery was September 26) and I had my blood pressure taken and it was too LOW! Ha ha! Low! My doctor has changed my blood pressure meds to a lower dose because of the 26 1/2 pound weight loss (so far!). I felt pretty crappy yesterday but it's for all the right reasons!

I'm reading a lot of stories and responses by people regarding the pre-op diet. I am not, not, NOT a sweets eater so it takes me literally HOURS to finish one protein drink. I hate every single brand I've tried. I am a teacher and on the first day I started one at 9:30 and finished at noon. Then it took me the rest of the day to get the other one down! I followed it to the letter for five days (lost six pounds) and then started to add more proten because I felt weak from the lack of calories. Now I'm reading forums from lots of people who say their doctors did not make them follow it, some who said it actually wasn't necessary, etc. I had two friends from two different doctors who were NOT told to follow it and three friends from three different doctors who WERE told to follow it. I understand the part about shrinking the liver, but I have a gut feeling that the real reason is twofold: one, so that we don't eat ourselves into oblivion (which I was doing before the pre-op diet), and two, so that the all-liquid diet afterwards doesn't feel like such a shock. I think this is boiling down to a doctor's preference. Not sure now why any of this is necessary . . . I feel like I'm starving!

KarenF1972, you just gave me a good laugh! I wanted to eat my own children and pets when I was following pre-op. Mostly I was bored. But I got past it! And BTW, my BMI was below 40 to start and my doctor required that I lose only five pounds, so I followed it to the letter the first week and the second week I was definitely adding more Protein and a few Snacks here and there (stuck to low fat). I knew to stay low fat, but I was already past the five pounds (ended up being down 10 by the time I had surgery). So, yeah, it was a pain but I did't follow it to the letter the entire time and everything turned out fine. I really believe now that the pre-op is more about making sure you don't gorge yourself up the scale before surgery. Smaller liver, sure, but it's obviously not life and death since not everyone is being required to follow it. But I'm 13 days post-op right now and happier than ever . . . pre-op is all a blur!

Oh, dashofsunshine . . . I have a lump in my throat reading your passage. I feel for you! I just had my surgery on September 26. There are great things in store for you! You're going to be a new person and be SOOOOO happy!!!

Well, here I am 12 days post op! I lost 10 pounds pre-op diet and 12 pounds since surgery. It is coming off fast but I'm paying more attention to the diet than the scale. I went on Stage 3 diet a week early (they said no problem since I was tolerating everything so well) because I could not--NOT--drink another shake and I had no find a way to get my protein in. Believe me, it was just about adding eggs and tuna fish and cottage cheese (exciting!)--nothing too crunchy or drastic. I was almost in tears from those shakes because I disliked them so much. I'm not a sweets eater, never was, and particularly would never drink a milk shake, much less one that tastes bad. But that's behind me now. What is very, very new to me and something I so far don't really like is having to actually spend more time eating! I'll have to see what others in my group session say. The thing is, I had a BMI of less than 40 before I even looked into this. I'm not hundreds of pounds overweight, I looked like I did and weighed what I weighed because I love junk food, fast food, and anything fried. But . . . I didn't eat all day! I ate and I was done until my next meal (which wasn't always the best choices, I know). I'm not used to taking forever to eat a dollop of tuna fish! I am physically and literally spending more time eating and I'm not really enjoying it. I'm finding it a nuisance. I only get 40 minutes for lunch and I spend the entire time trying to eat! I'm looking forward to having this whole thing settle down, which I sure hope it does.

My old Weight Watchers leader always said "pictures don't lie." I've done everything I can do to avoid getting in pictures, but someone snapped one of me--a group shot--and when I saw it, my old Weight Watchers leader's face flashed before me. I can stay in denial as long as I didn't have to look at myself! Nonetheless, I had my surgery a few days ago . . . I'm ready!!

I am a teacher and wish to God I would have done this over the summer so I could just have come back thinner with my "I've been seeing a nutritionist and personal trainer" stories. Instead, people will be watching me get smaller and smaller and I really don't want that kind of attention as I tend to be private. You know, the million questions of "how are you doing it?" "what are you eating" "aren't you losing too fast?" "You're not eating enough." Believe me, I've been working at this building for 17 years and I can hear everything already! Don't get me wrong, I take compliments well (and welcome them!) but there are a lot of nosy, gossipy people where I work. Well, my close co-workers have seen me drinking those protein drinks for lunch, so after surgery I'll just claim, "Whew! All that hard work (and near-starvation!) is finally kicking in!" Ha ha ha . . . my surgery is Friday (9/26) and I just want to get this over with! Sigh . . .

Oh boy. My surgery is Friday! Nervous as can be . . .

Yes, we can't change genetics! So true!

Also, I spoke to my doctor's office yesterday and asked if I would be following all clear liquids two days before the surgery (which many have said they followed) and they told me no, just keep following what you're doing. They actually seemed baffled about the clear liquid diet before surgery. Go figure!

Okay, everybody . . . thanks for all the input. But, uh, can we dispense with the advice to "stop whining" and "pull up my big girl pants." I'm not whining--never was--I was simply curious as to why a diet that was presented to me as "follow it or else" was not uniform across the board for others. A friend of mine whose starting weight was 420 wasn't asked to drop even one pound before her surgery or follow any special diet. Apparently her liver wasn't too slimy to handle! Just found it odd. That's all. Curiousity. I've got it, people. Small liver. Prepare for future. Get used to things. For my own good. Thanks all, but it's getting a little weary having people respond like I'm a whining idiot. Some of you are very positive and uplifting, which is great to hear eight days before my surgery.

Wow, CPAronold! How interesting! I'm not on clear liquids at all. I have a protein shake in the a.m., fruit (only apple, orange, or pear) for mid-morning. Salad with four ounces of protein with two tablespoons of low cal dressing for lunch, fruit again mid-afternoon and then protein shake for dinner. I'm used to it and have mostly followed it. On the days when I'm very strict, I lost two pounds in one day! I, too, and getting excited! Eight more days!!

I am getting sleeved on 9/26, and I don't think there was a particular "straw" per se. However, it was on my mind constantly--the fact that I can't wear the nice clothing I want to wear, the fact that I was always looking at co-workers and others and thinking, "Why can't I be thin like that?" The next thing I knew I was at an informational meeting, with the idea of getting a lap band. Didn't want anything permanent! But I could tell that my doctor is not crazy about the lap band. He said he is currently removing more lap bands than he's putting in. That kind of sealed it for me. Anyway, it's all been cumulative. I was once thin so the memories are there. I saw an old video of me when I was a size four and I was eating my heart out . . . I couldn't believe how good I looked! "Did I appreciate it?" I thought to myself. I know I would now! One thing that pushed me to do it was that this past summer I turned down an invitation to go to my 35-year high school reunion. There were people there I really wanted to see! I have turned down many invitations, but soon--no more! I just got tired of the whole weight issue/body image monopolizing so much of my though processes . . .

Well, they won't do surgery if you have a fever because that's an indication of infection. You should be fine with your symptoms, although I know it's a nuisance right now. Get well quickly!

Well, thank God! It sounds positively awful. Can't someone give it another name??