WhatTheHellHappened

Male 47 y/o 313LBs, 5'7"

Yes, What the hell did happen to me? I was a thin / skinny / muscular kid, had a paper route, skateboard or biked everywhere, etc... Once I got my drivers license and started working in a restaurant all forms of exercise stopped, except for the eating, I constantly grazed all night long in the kitchen of the restaurant. I gained 50 LBs that year at 18 y/o. I didn't mind the extra weight at first, being only 5'7" the extra weight gave me some size, I wasn't as puny as I once felt. Fast forward 29 years of constant gain I'm floating between 310-320, my knees are killing me, I'm on hbp pills, cholesterol pills...wondering still how did I do this to myself? besides the obvious.

About a year ago I made an appointment with a bariatric surgeon, I was pretty sold on the idea, but then talked myself out of it with then seemingly good reasons.

Fast forward to today, I made another appointment with the surgeon for tomorrow, this time I got to do it. After struggling walking / hiking on our family vacation last week & seeing the pics of myself, showed me how delusional I had been about my weight & looks, the pics scared me. It's funny how the pics scared me, but looking face on in the mirror I didn't see it.

The kick in the azz also (on vacation) was after I dropped my wife & kids off (again) to go on the boardwalk / rides because I didn't want to walk or be around people, so I went off and sat by myself somewhere else thinking back to last years appointment, thinking that if I had done it then, I'd pretty much would've been where I need to be by now. I hate that it's come to this.

The good thing now is that I can't talk myself out of it (surgery)anymore, there are no good reasons to wait or try something else instead. I have a good life and want more of it, so I'm going for it.