nina874

Forgive.... I am more of a believer in Karma myself, I truely believe in what goes around. That said if anyone ever harmed one of my children.....could I forgive a child molester....nope not a chance. I can forgive hurt that is inflicted on me far more easily than I can hurt that is inflicted on someone that I love, my rage is always greater when I am protecting my loved ones. I forgive my mother for being an alchoholic, I understand what lead her down that path and feel a great deal of sadness and compassion whenever I think of her, but I will never forget that she was one...how could I ??? I think that you can remember without holding a grudge, but still learn from the lesson. Other times it is almost a duty NOT to forget, if the person concerned has no remorse and will happily commit the same offense again and again, then it is our duty to protect others from them. It depends on the severity, what exactly they did to need forgivness for. I have noticed that people who are unpleasant in whatever way, eventually will come up against a situation more unpleasant than them, and then the karmic balance is restored, sometimes karma needs a gentle prod but that is normally all it takes. Mostly I just cut out people that do unforgivable things, I am more of a 'if the family dog bites me it goes to the pound so it can never threaten my kids' kind of person. Nina x

I dont know if they will be able to help you but Surgicare in Manchester use the MRI for fills, I wonder if they would be able to get you an emergancy appointment at the MRI? Nina

Hi Josette, Emerald and Sue, I have also lost my mum, she died of cirrosis 9 years ago ( has it been that long.....) and I still miss her at the most unexpected times. Any holiday that I associate with family is always hard, but I find that the anticipation of the day is worse than the actual day itself if you know what I mean. I have always found comfort in food, but right now I am trying to tell myself that I might feel better as I am eating it, but 10 minutes/a day later I will be beating myself up, which will just make me more miserable. I know it is a bit of a cliche, but I want her to look down and think that I am doing well, cos if she knows one thing its that she raised a survivor! We can all help each other through this, I am further down the healing process than some, and I can promise you that it does get easier, I can talk about my mum and laugh about things that she did now , something that I thought would be impossible a few years ago, the pain does ease. Nina x

JM - thanks for the welcome :confused: I have to say though now I am really worried, the cross trainer half killed me today!! LOL I dont know what made you go all yucky, is there a chance that you are coming down with something? I wouldnt beat yourself up though, some days when I am doing resistance training I feel on top of the world, and other days it feels like my muscles are on fire and they weight ten times as much. there doesnt seem to be any rhyme or reason to it. Good luck with the rest of the program! Nina x

When I was on prozac about 4 years ago I had terrible heartburn all the time, especially if I took them on an empty stomach. To be fair though once I went over a BMi of 35 I had reflux all the time too! NIna x

NYTrink - I dont understand the insurance thing as I am in the UK, but I have got my fingers crossed that it all works out for you hon. Nina x

Hi everyone else! Soupgirl - I havent had any hair loss yet - touch wood- I know that a lot of the girls are taking zinc and something called Biotin? In the carribean, ooooooh the food is good there, I love chicken and rice I would struggle like mad there!! I havent got any support where I am, I think I must be the only person in 100 mile radius that has a band!! Jill - welcome aboard hon, it will be the best thing you have ever done! I am newly banded and I am already sooo glad that I did it. Katy - thanks for the advice, I have hit a plataeu in the last 10 days :confused: ironically enough, when I started a rigid exercise program!! I have stopped weighing myself and started using the tape measure instead. Hope that everyone is doing fine, I am due my first fill under x ray on the 27th and I cant wait!! Nina x

<p>Awww Baby its YOU thats got my body, I wondered where god sent it when I wished for it........... <img src="http://www.LapBandTalk.com/images/smilies/grin.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" smilieid="57" class="inlineimg" /></p>

The Thread was ' Why do people set their goal weights so high?' Originally Posted by Mariposa Bella Originally Posted by Mariposa Bella I'm 5"2" but always say I'm 5"3", started at 195 lbs a busting out of size 16, got down to 137 size 8, sometimes, very few times a 6.. and now I'm at about 155 in a size 10. Okay now tell me, why have some of you chosen to have such small goal weights of 120 or below?? I thought I wanted to weigh 130 but when I was 137 my husband said that is enough, don't lose anymore, you are starting to look sickly, you look great like this please don't lose anymore, so I stopped. I was a nice size 8, and felt great at that weight, I am truly amazed when I read that some of you are a size 0 or 2, WOW, I don't think I'd ever want to be that skinny.. Not for me, I need to get back in my 8 and I'll be comfortable.. So ladies, please don't feel that you have to get to a tiny little number, re-evaluate yourself when you lose weight, find a healthy, normal range for you, just my humble opinion. My goal weight picked me. I didn't try to get down to 107lbs, but through a good healthy diet, and daily exercise that's where I ended up. And I don't look ill, or sick at all. I am not skinny, nor do I feel pressure from anyone to be thin. At an 8 or a 10, I am still fat. I am tiny. I have tiny feet, tiny hands, and and am just a little person. So my current weight suits me just fine. Skinny is not actually a word I would use to describe myself. I look athletic, and healthy. Not skinny. My weight does not define me at all. Nor does the tag on my dress. And I am sorry that you get the impression that it does, but you are very wrong about that. I'm glad to hear that you feel perfectly healthy at your weight, I was just saying that I would hate for some of us to feel like somehow we were not successful with our bands if we don't get to such a tiny number. For me, 137 was a great weight, so that's is all I meant. Maybe I'm just jelouse.. I'm happy for you.. don't misinterpret my post.. I'm not the most eloquent at speaking or writing. I just want everyone to decide what is best for them, not for anyone else. Was my post what started this debate?? Good Lord, I hope not. As I said, FOR ME, that would be too small or yes in my eyes too skinny.. and I hate to say this, but there is such a thing as being too thin.. Look at how Nicole Ritchie and the Olsen twin girl looked.. they looked disgusting. I'm not the only one that thinks that. I am happy that some/all of you are meeting your goals at 100%.. Forgive me if I fell short of meeting my goal of 135 and stopped at 137. I personally looked really good, some oldies on this board saw my pictures taken after my weightloss and surgeries and if I say so myself, I looked pretty damn good. For me, 137 is a good weight.. My 12 year old daughter weighs about 120 lbs (very athletic and toned, she's a dancer) and is a size 0 or 1 depending on the brand.. And for me that would not be a good weight.. I could however steal her very cute clothes, Hugh?? There's a thought. No seriously, I don't want to offend anyone, but each and everyone of us, needs to evaluate themselves and decide where they feel good and healthy. And to those idiots that are sending pm's offending others, stop it.. Be happy with yourself, love yourself and respect others.. Didn't your momma teach you all this?? OOPS, I know, I know, your tired of me, but I missed highlighting some.. Can someone please teach me to edit my posts.. When I try to edit, all I get are happy face creatures in front of letters.. __________________ Banded 11-4-04 Port Revised 7-4-05 I think you would have to ask the OP if this thread was inspired by you, because I don't know. I know that MY part in this thread has been inspired by all the mean spirited people who have taken great pains to tell me I am skinny, anorexic, ugly and nasty. And I am not sure what the point in posting the content of that thread was. My point there, as it is here is, as much as people don't like being called fat, I don't like being called skinny, and scrawny. And let me tell you, when you pick my weight, or dress size, and say that at your height (which is the same as mine) you would look scrawny and skinny, it tends to give the impression that you are talking about me. I am sorry that if by saying whatever I am you think I am saying that you are falling short (I have no idea what I did to give the impression I think that by not being super skinny people are falling short, I never actually used that expression till just now...) See, I have no freaking idea where you get the idea that I think I have to be super skinny. Just because my weight is not one you could imagine on yourself, doesn't mean that I am unhealthy. And that is what pissed me off. The fact that it is just assumed that if someone is under a particular weight, that they are at deaths door. It's not the case. I just came in from an 8km run, am eating a huge bowl of oats, and have a banana to eat after that. I eat, probably more than a lot of bandsters around here, and if I was as sickly as my weight is portrayed to be by some people, I would be hooked up to an IV, not out running, and about to eat more than some people do in a day!! I eat the way I do (vegetarian and organic) because I feel almost super human when I do. I exercise the way I do, because it adds to the way I feel. I am alive. I feel better than most people could ever imagine, and the way I look, is just a very nice side effect. The way I eat and exercise is not driven by a need to be skinny, its driven by a need to be healthy. And I hate having to explain myself And to add to my previous thought, the reason I look "skinny" to some people is because a huge percentage of our population is overweight, and overweight is starting to look normal. So when people, who are used to seeing overweight people, see someone who is of a normal weight/BMI, they look too thin. So, the Olsen twins who are at the lower end of a healthy BMI, DO look too thin, compared to someone who is overweight or morbidly obese Chickie, I am sorry that you feel like you have to defend your position on being the size you are.. I admire your dedication to maintaing your weight and for keeping it off and for eating healthy.. It seems like you were able to conquer your demons.. I on the other hand am still struggling. I don't excercise and rarely eat healthy, I am what I am due to my same old self-destructive habits. When I was AT MY GOAL, I WAS SUPER HAPPY. Keep in mind that I have been fat or obsese then thin, then thin to fat to obese for almost my whole adult life.. I only weighed 190 lbs when I started and had lost the weight many times, but because I never learned how to kill the fat demon, I had to get the band. FOR ME AND ONLY ME.. 135 was a good weight, I wasn't fat anymore, but i never set out to become what I had never been or could never be at realistically. I got to the weight I though suited me and only me.. I just don't think I should be expected to be at 120 or whatever number on someone's chart, for me and only me that would not work.. Not for you, I have never been speaking of you. Please I haven't been on the board not even a week and already I am misunderstood. I hate that people called you scrawny or ugly. That is just hateful.. I just want you to know that I don't think I am selling myself short by having a larger goal weight than you. OMG I am so tired of trying to explain myself, I am exhausted.. I am not commenting on this anymore. I apologize if I without wanting to offended Why on earth would I think that? My goodness. My own husband is overweight. Not just chubby, but overweight. I don't judge him, so WHY would I judge anyone else? I never, ever said ANYWHERE that people who don't get down to some impossible number as selling themselves short. I always say that any loss is going to improve a persons health, and that is the main goal of being banded. My health was my main focus. Sure there was an element of vanity in there, I cannot deny that, but I wanted to live a long, healthy productive life. And even a 50lb loss would have gone a long way in achieving that aim. I was lucky, and I developed a fantastic lifestyle, and managed to lose 190lbs. But I would have been just as happy with 50, or 100lbs. Because it achieved my main goal of improving my health. I would just like to know how you got the impression that I think you are selling yourself short? I mean, I never actually said anything of the sort to you (or anything actually) What am I saying or doing to give people idea's like that? An example of the rest of the thread Quote: Originally Posted by kathystrick I chose my goal weight based on the weight charts and healthy BMI. I have my goal posted as 165, but at 5'10, I do believe that is going to be smaller than I am comfortable with on my body. I have been down to 225 as an adult and wore a 16/18 and felt quite skinny-collar bones and hip bones poking out, sunken cheeks, sculpted jaw. I just can't imagine my body 60 pounds smaller than that. I will keep my goal weight posted as 165, but as I get closer to that, it is likely to change. Jachuts response That's certainly a measure over how different we all are. At five foot 10 myself, I was banded at 240lb. At 225 I was desperately unhappy with what I saw as my enormous weight problem - I had health problems as a result of it too. I hate to single someone out and because this IS a personal issue and everyone should be able to decide what they want to weigh for themselves. But I just cant not comment here because to me that's a very bizarre thing to say. This is where I really think there's a bit of body image issues to this, I really cannot believe that at 225 a 5ft 10 woman would have sunken cheeks and jutting bones - its still a BMI of 32, heck, its still obese. To think you wont be comfortable being smaller, eek, I dont know, I just see that there must be some reason why you think that - and I think its showing an inability to recognise what healthy weight is meant to look like - its not bony and unattractive its (to use that awful word again) normal! I really do respect your right to weigh whatever you want but I cannot in any way truly understand your reasoning on this, and that's the point I've been trying to make - I dont argue with it but I cant help thinking that thay's just well, dysfunctional. 225 is obese and I cant understand how anyone cant see that, or why they'd choose it when they have this wonderful tool that makes it possible to achieve a healthy weight. Please dont take offence at this, its hard to say without sounding wrong, but I am quite baffled by it. Dr. Ernesto I Know from previous comments that Chickie made on the thread that she has had some really hateful comments left on her blog, and I can understand why she is upset, I would be gutted, but Mariposa wasnt the one that left those comments. I think she entered into a lively debate unaware that it had gone off the origional subject ' Why do people set their goal weights so high' and onto ' why do people critise people who are a low BMI'. I dont think that she intended to hurt anyone. Yes after trying to explain she did lose her temper, but I think what was posted was posted out of frustration, I am not saying that I agree with it, Just that I can see how it would happen. To be honest I found a lot of the thread to be sanctimonious and considering that the vast majority of the people on the board are here because it is the only place that getting down to 200lbs is a cause for major celebration, quite derogatory at times,and actually found myself playing devils advocate because of that, but thats just my opinion! ( I'll go and put my asbestos suit on now ) And just for the record I think that both ladies involved look fantastic!!!!

Hi all, and thanks losing for inviting me over :confused: I have a couple of questions if you dont mind me picking your brains. I have a cross trainer at home ( I live in a rural area and my nearest half decent gym is MILES away) is that the same as exercise as running? Would I be better doing a proper run outside? ( I do have the English weather to contend with though) I am desperate to get my fitness up so can I join and do mine on the cross trainer for now, while I try to find a gym - you have to be here to believe it! Look forwards to comparing notes, though I have to say that just looking at week one scares me! Nina x

Will go and look now! Nina x

I just posted on your other thread!! I am so in awe of you losing! I am trying to build up to 10 minutes aerobic a day, I am great with weights I just have no puff IYKWIM!! Nina x

How did you do it????? I have never been able to run! I am in the recovery range of a 70 year old quad bypass patient. PLEASE tell me how you have done it! Nina x And again WOW !!!

Oh Lord, I am doomed!!! I do have friends who 'eat to live' - grrrrrr and I guess what I was hoping for was eventually getting to that point, where food wasnt that important to me. Oh bugger, thats me then, I suppose it is a much more healthy obsession, is it a personality thing I wonder? Are we more likely to be obsessive people in general then? I know that I am, but I dont have a very long attention span, which to be frank doesn't bode well.... What about everyone else? Nina x

Here it is, hope this helps http://www.lapbandtalk.com/f17/why-band-43800/ Nina x

There was a really good thread recently about why people chose the band I will see if I can find it for you. Nina x

That is amazing, to have smelled them cooking and not just dived face first into the pile....WOO HOOO!! You have more will power than me! I cant believe you are still baking, my poor kids are in a home bake wilderness at the moment!! LOL Well done hon!!!! :confused: Nina x

Saw the other thread, and stand by what I said at the time, that comments were being taken out of context, the initial comments were directed internally - not at anyone. I am not going to drag it all up here though, if people want to take time to read through all the threads they may see either point of view, frankly I dont give a stuff and I dont think that you should either. Take satisfaction that you are stunning hon, and from what I have seen of your normal posting, you are lovely on the inside too. One of the problems with rants and raves is that people can take things personally which can lead to rows! I feel that goal weight is a totally personal thing, and if you are happy and healthy where you are then stuff what anyone else thinks! I dont think that you, or anyone else, should have to feel that they have to make up an 'excuse' for why you are happy where you are. BTW love your hair!!! Nina xx

OMG Losing!! That is amazing!!! You will be so proud of yourself. Will you be running to raise money for a cause, or just running to show yourself you can? :confused: I am so impressed hon , it makes my flipping 1 minute then rest a minute on the cross trainer pale in comparison!! I will be rooting for you!! Nina xx

WOW!!!! You look fantastic hon!! You must feel the difference so much, and to lose all that in six months!!! You go girl!!! Nina x

I think that the answer from the more experianced bandsters will be that you havent found the 'sweet spot' yet. I know that it is different for everyone where they get that restriction. Some people tighten up a week or so after a fill so it may still kick in a bit more. I would ring the docs though and tell them that you can still eat pizza and see what they say. Dont let it spoil your holiday! Just try to be aware of the whole calories in and out thing,and enjoy youself! Nina xx

Thats something I am working on myself, more so that I am scared of getting the full feeling, as it is still associated with hunger= weightloss! I did have some really dark chocolate the other night, just 2 pieces, and it was a mix of congratulations that I walked away from the rest, and terror that it would kick off a binge! I think the terror won!! I dont know the answer, I think that when I get to goal I will be more comfortable, right now I just want to get the weight off and I cant mentally get away from the whole diet thing! Nina x

Hi all, I hope that you can give me some help here. Before I even had surgery I asked to speak to one of surgicare's (my clinic) fitness experts. I specifically asked him about using my power plate, and he went away and rang back to tell me that 1 week post-op I would be fine to use it. I asked him about all sorts of exercises and basically he told me to listen to my body and build it up. I have merrily been using my plate, doing my crunches, a bit of light weight training ( I am crap at cardio, but I am joining a gym next week) and now looking at the posts on here I am worried that I have dislodged my band/stopped it healing properly! Surely I would know if I had??? HELP if I dont work out my weight loss will stop - I know what my body is like - and if that happens then I will get negged out - I have to stay in the zone if you know what I mean Nina xx

Thanks Dave, It is no wonder that us newbies get so confused!! No two doctors seem to give the same advice, to make matters worse I found the booklet that they gave me, and that doesnt tie up with what their fitness expert told me when I rang??? I think that I will just carry on, if I was going to have done damage I will have done it by now anyway! Nothing hurts more than it should. Cant wait to get back into the gym Nina x

One that I have found to be usually true is that white guys cant dance ( sorry DH, love ya but you have nooooo idea how to sex it up on the dance floor) I apologise in advance to all the make white dancers that I will have now offended!LOL Nina x