alexsisv

Hi Friends, I’ve taken a bit of time to write my story as it comes from my heart and I hope that it’s helpful. Let me say – I’m here if you have questions or if there’s anything I can do to help. LIFE BEFORE: My quality of life wasn't very good, although my health #'s weren't incredibly high, I just didn’t feel healthy. My blood pressure was borderline high but otherwise pretty much normal. Personally, I just didn't feel good in my skin. Clothes didn't fit right or they just felt like potato sacks. I was a size 24 at my highest, 260 lbs and I’m 5’6”. My biggest worry day to day was – am I going to break a chair. It was dreadful. I hated airline travel, movie theaters, going to amusement parks (size of the rides). I think the part that hurt the most was feeling like a “ghost” in society. People really didn't make eye contact or engage in conversation with me. Maybe that was my own perception but it was pretty consistent. Let’s be honest now: my go-to relief when feeling stressed was fast food. If I forgot to eat a meal, I'd just run and get fast food. The problem was the quantity and frequency I'd eat burgers, burritos, fries and so much diet soda. So much soda that even my little daughter would comment about it. She was 4.5 at the time! I recall a day where I had fast food for: breakfast, lunch, a snack and then dinner. These were burgers and fries. It was just so tasty, fast and easy but I knew it was unhealthy. I just couldn’t find a stop! I met my surgeon and instantly felt connected to him. I could be honest with him and he wouldn't judge or make me feel bad. I ran my "numbers" prior to meeting him -- I think this helped me justify wanting to do the sleeve and I’m a very analytical person. My numbers were -- how many diets I've tried and failed, how many years I've been dieting, max weight lost and then regained..... this all added up to spending 13+ years of my life on a diet! So eye opening. This wasn't a great quality of life! My surgeon showed me all of the options and spent probably 45 mins. during initial consult. I read books about being sleeved, combed this forum to learn everything. When I was ready, I took home my information and reviewed it with my husband. For me, it was essential to have him on board and to be a key support. Everything aligned and I was approved by my insurance in about 10 working days. There really was no contest with a BMI of 41. I decided that getting the VSG was right for me. I was ready to make this life-long commitment. I had the mind-set that this was not a quick fix or a fad. My doctor recommended I lose as much weight as I could but required no specific pre-surgery diet, except no food 8 hours prior to surgery. I had no food funeral as I didn’t want to glorify food any more than I already had. I was also researching and really putting my heart into finding another stress outlet rather than food. SURGERY: I was sleeved on Sept. 15, 2014 with a high weight of 260, BMI 41. On surgery day I remember feeling extremely nervous, scared and at the same time ready to open a new chapter of my life. Anyhow, the surgery went well and I remember having loads of pain meds if I needed them, using a button I would press and pain med would go into my IV. I had a bit of abdominal pain but otherwise surgery went well and my hiatal hernia was repaired. POST-SURGERY: My weight loss was slow and I had several plateaus. I just let it flow and I chose not to obsess over the scale. It would come off at the pace my body was ready to let the pounds go. This is a lifelong commitment and I had/have the mindset that I would not freak out if I only lost .5 pounds a week or nothing at all. Just to be patient! I did have several chronic illnesses develop but I can't honestly say they were due to the VSG…. However, dramatic weight loss is a stressor on the body and stressors will make the body do weird things. Keep that in mind. I had two instances where I threw up and I can say this was a complete learning experience! My food cravings slowly went from cheese burgers to things like fresh organic carrots… very weird, right?! I cut out the fast food for a year. I am at the point where I can only eat about 1/4 of a burger and then just toss the rest. It was definitely tough!! Learning how much my sleeve could hold, learning how to eat out and not feel uncomfortable, buying new clothes, seeing myself becoming "visible" to society again. Struggling with seeing myself as a different kind of beautiful..... getting the VSG is a lifelong commitment, you have to be ready for a complete rework. There will be loose skin but gosh, it's just skin. My biggest pain in the butt areas -- my chin and my belly loose skin. Ah, well. FOOD NOW: I now spend a lot of time preparing fresh meals, going to specialty shops.... I have the mentality that if I'm going to eat 3 ounces, it better taste really darn good! I also just breathe a lot, consciously slow down when eating and just chew the heck out of my food bites. Ironically, I’m now reading a lot about food preparation and have taken an interest in cooking classes. Fast foods taste very salty tome. I probably should be drinking more water. I do rely on protein shakes when I need food quickly – like for breakfast. I plan to take fruit with me or granola bars if I’m going to be out running errands and may get hungry. I eat more like 6 small meals a day. I eat out at restaurants but typically take ½ of my meal in a to-go box. My go to explanation: “I have a small stomach” or “I will enjoy the rest tomorrow!” --- be ready for this… there are food police that worry about you. They mean well (ex: friends). LIFE TODAY: My family has been incredibly supportive, non-judgemental and very kind. It is absolutely crucial to your success that you have a "team" to be your cheerleaders. For me, there were points when I doubted my decision (I’m being honest with you) and just generally struggled. As I write, I’m feeling pretty darn good – except for chronic illnesses that make things very painful. Food isn't a really big deal in my life now. It's just food now - rather than my stress reliever. However, when I’m hit with bad news, I find myself thinking “gosh, maybe I should get some fries”. I don’t act on my thoughts. I chose not to tell most people as I didn’t want them making a judgement call on my decision to do VSG. I “blame” my weight loss on my chronic illnesses and people will leave that alone. VSG is such a personal decision – it’s your body. After 18 months - I have lost 85 pounds and I’m a size 12. I have 15 more pounds to go. I have not been able to really resume an active, exercise program as I'm fighting 3 chronic illnesses (Lupus, RA and Fibromylgia). I have had to absolutely reduce the stress in my life and stop working at my lifelong career due to my illnesses. My blood pressure is now well below normal and I feel really good about how things progressed. I feel physically beautiful and I'm okay if I don't lose the last 15 pounds. I would like to start running when I feel better and also resuming scuba diving! :-) I am all over the place writing to you and it's 1 AM --- anyhow, I'm proud of everyone on this site. VSG is tough, it's a complete lifestyle changer and we are very lucky to have each other. I am here for you and happy to answer any questions. Please know that at ANY weight, you are important and you are beautiful. VSG is a tool and you can do it! Please really do your homework, find a support network and breathe…. It just takes time. This is a life long journey and will take months, maybe years. I found a before picture but my now picture only shows my face. I can't find a full body right now. Will attach more to my profile when I find them :-) Namaste and God bless each of you. Hugs. -- Alexsis

I am so sorry you are going through this. Our surgery dates are close - I also experienced this sensation where it felt like a golf ball was lodged in my throat. The more I thought about the painful sensation, the more it seemed to really hurt me. I couldn't find a connection between what I ate and the esophageal pain. Went through xray, CAT scans, Upper GIs, Endoscopy, carafate, the GI cocktail -- all clear and no stricture, no food/pill lodged.... So incredibly frustrating. I can tell you this --- after 10 months the sensation has slowed down and pretty much stopped. I am on Protonix 2xs per day, I am on pain meds for other issues and I take Xanax 1-2 times per day. That and reducing stress in my life. I searched this board high and low to find someone who is challenged with the same issues. It's seriously horrible. They even did exploratory surgery to see if there were adhesions or a new hiatal hernia -> nothing. Things will get better. It completely stinks for now but things will settle out. Several months after the golf ball sensation, I was diagnosed with Lupus and Fibromylgia. It's really hard to piece out what was the exact cause of the esophageal pain. Message me if I can be of help. -- Alexsis

Did anyone have trouble visualizing themselves as a slim or normal looking person at 75+ pounds down? I'm nearly 11 months post op and closing on 80 pounds down. I still see myself as the obese person I was prior to getting sleeved, sometimes. Hard to wrap my head around my new body image. I'm proud of the accomplishment and it has had its share of struggles. Any advice or insight?

Do you have a scale that measures your body fat? That can be helpful when you stall -- you might see the % body fat drop. You can work through the stall. Just be patient and maybe stop weighing so often?

I had an 8 week stall. What can you do right, except be patient and realize everyone's body is different. I didn't give up - I guess we really don't have much choice with being volume restricted. But, hey I'm down nearly 75 pounds and coming up on my 1 year anniversary. Patience and realizing this is a long term/permenant thing.

Congratulations! Don't get upset if you fluxuate a little and cross back over. Just stay consistent and steady. You will get there.

Give it time and keep focused on the end goal. Stalls stink and you may go up or down 1.5 pounds. The body is resetting and the stall could take 4 weeks. Been there. Patient hat on.

Amen. Post op is extremely challenging. There are plateaus, new ways of thinking and eating. Say goodbye to soda. You have to be ready for the possibility of a new host of health issues. It takes time to lose the weight. I chuckle when I read posts about "it's been 7 days and I've only lost a pound." I went through 2 1 month plateaus. Gotta be all in to play the VSG game. Ranting over too. Please really think thru your decision to get the sleeve, Folks.

Try gummy vitamins.

You may want to just check with your surgeon. I had a pulmonary ebolism and it felt like a bad case of bronchitis, not necessarily textbook. Not to scare you but better to be safe. I got my PE post appendectomy not post sleeve.

Absolutely. I've noticed the same thing. No one talked or made eye contact when I was 70 lbs bigger..... now, it's totally different.

I had the sensation of pain.... like I ate a rock.

Welcome aboard! Best of luck to you on your upcoming surgery.

Way to go!

Restriction will be felt as soon as you start on solids. Liquids flow right thru your sleeve. This is normal.... Don't stress.