Mysticblu

I have my surgery approved for Aug 6th. I go to my final appointment with he nutritionist tomorrow and start my pre op diet the following day. I have gone through every emotion, every rationality, every fear, etc through this process. And now...well I am still scared and still confused. I know my reasons for starting this process were way more than vanity. My family health history looms over my head and I feared it and was fighting a losing battle to avoid it. I am prediabetic with high cholesterol and high triglycerides. I used to be more active than I have been in the last year but even at my best 1200 calorie a day diet and 2 hr workouts 5 days a week lifestyle the smallest I could get down to was 175 and that's just a few weekends, special occasions, or holidays away from an easy 200 pounds or more. That is where I have lived since I was 18 years old (for 20 yrs now). I get mixed reactions from those who I have confided in and honestly I mostly hear "don't do it!" I have even thought of canceling my surgery date and trying one more time on my own or telling myself that maybe 175-180 isn't that bad. But the bottom line is that I know I wasn't happy or healthy at that weight and let's be honest at that weight this isn't even an option for me I'll have to wait and reconsider when I have yet once again yo-yo'd my way back to 200+. With that being said I have a friend who went to Tijuana about 2.5 yrs ago for the sleeve. She has had a very successful time. She is down to 130 and if I had to guess I'd put her in a size 4. She is no longer prediabetic nor has high cholesterol anymore. She has been my inspiration during this process and my go to for advice. She is the one who suggested I get on a forum and I am happy that I did because reading all of your comments I realize that I am not the only one feeling this way, scared of complications or permanency, concerned about the pre and post op diets, frustrated with the process, excited and scared all at the same time. Thank you for sharing and allowing me to do so as well.