Fanny Adams

Looks like it's just thee and me, acl, but I'll hold out hopes for more to join us. I'll be home from site on Friday night and will try to organise something for next week and post details.

While you might be eating more than "you should be", how does that compare with your pre-banding eating habits? I find that I can easily eat 1 cup of food and can push it to about 1.5 cups when I'm really hungry, but I can't go past that point. If I compare that to my pre-banding days, that is still a tiny portion, so I would think that you shouldn't regain too much of the weight lost. I also find that the more solid the food, the smaller the portion, whereas I'm quite happy to eat 2 cups of Soup and could probably manage more. I was lucky enough to get a fill at 5 weeks out, but I asked for only half the usual amount as I don't want to have very tight restriction. All I can suggest for you is to make really healthy choices whenever you can and go for the bulkiest food, rather than Protein drinks. Not only will the more solid food fill you better, but you will have to spend far more time chewing and will likely get much better satisfaction from having eaten than you would from soft foods. Good luck and hang in there!!

Pretty much the same. Dianetics is the "psychological" theory and Scientology the full-blown cult. There are quite a few schools and private tutoring centres around that push Dianetics and claim that they are independent of the Church. Mind you, they are fully funded by and solely operated by Church members, so you decide how independent they are...

I see you are both recently banded - I'm only a month before you and I found that once I got past the liquid and mushie stage, I got full on around 1 - 1.5 cups of food, prior to my first fill. I don't want supertight restriction, so I went easy on the first fill and only had 1cc put in, so the situation is much the same now. It feels a little different to the FULL feeling that you get after Xmas dinner or something like that, but is similar enough to recognise, just higher up in your stomach. I didn't get that same feeling from liquids after the first couple healing days.

Hehehe - I have a similar approach when home. When I hit that plateau/regain phase in the post-op, I REFUSED to update my ticker until I could show that it had moved down again. It took from 14 Dec to 3 Jan before I could update it, but I wasn't going to update it UPwards!

LOL - yes, that one is pretty tactless. I can understand thinking "oh, so I was the biggest slob before?"

I'm really scared about having too much restriction and, personally, would rather have to add a bit of willpower to a light restriction from the band than have to deal with PB'ing and getting stuck. I can manage "a little" willpower on my own, it's when I have to keep up "a lot" over time that I fail...

I've only been banded since 10 Dec and am due at the doctor's on Monday 15th for my first fill. I'm not sure what is going on, but I've been feeling less and less hungry over the last week. My post-op regime was supposed to 4 days on Clear liquids, 7-10 days on thick liquids, 1-2 weeks on mushies, and then back to normal eating, with the transition times being up to me and dependent upon how well I tolerated food. I was very good for the first 10 days, sticking exactly to the routine, but found by Day 10 I was absolutely ravenous. I made a big error in judgement on Day 10, and broke down and ate 4 breaded/fried half chicken wings Yes, yes, I know I was only supposed to be going into the mushy stage at the time and chicken wings aren't mushy!! Mind you, I did chew them to mush and beyond. Anyway, I've already been spanked severely for that on these boards when I confessed at the time, so please don't do that again. I need your advice on a different matter now... Over the mushy stage, I was pretty good although a couple of things were probably more "soft food" rather than truly mushy. Stuck to the calorie requirement well (in fact way below). About the only thing I did wrong was that I tended to push the 1 cup limit a little on the evening meal. I would get towards the end of the bowl and know that I was full and should stop but couldn't resist the taste and couldn't bear to throw the food out, so would just take it really really slowly and finish it all. At the end, I would feel uncomfortably full for quite a while, but never PB'd or anything. I can tolerate just about any type of food and am satisfied for hours on 1 cup. Anyway, now I am finding that I am feeling less and less hungry as the days go by and am starting to feel slightly nauseous all the time. I'm starting to get worried that the early chicken wings and the eating beyond the point of hunger have caused problems, possibly slippage or stretching the pouch. My port is in an awkward place (right on my waist line) and my work pants press against it uncomfortably when I sit. It also presses against my desk and over the last week, I have noticed it is starting to look a little bruised behind the scar, when it had been well-healed before I returned to work last week. I've been finding it harder to finish my evening meal Could the bruising be causing swelling, which is why I am not so hungry? Should I tell the doctor not to worry about the fill? I don't know how much I have lost in the last week, as I am not able to get near a scale till I get home from the mine site tomorrow night, but I don't think it has been a great deal. Typical day's eating: Breakfast - 1 poached egg, 1 muffin (no butter or fat) lunch - Optifast dinner - 2oz meat, 1/4 potato, 1 tbsp Beans, 1tbsp peas (or carrots, corn, broccholi, etc), 1tpbs gravy. 2-3 cups coffee with skim milk (not drunk with meals) Total: @ 700 cal I don't think I should be trying to eat much less than this, so don't think I need a fill, but am worried about why that is...

I really am a great believer in it all being the "headspace". Of course, there are some shallow men out there who will only look at appearances and will only want a perfect pretty doll on their arm, but there are many many men who DO look for personality and charm over a perfect body. One of the things I think we do as "fat people" is put up a mental barrier that wards off approaches or simply doesn't see them when they happen. We don't find ourselves attractive and, in our minds, our weight is one of the main reasons for that, so we project that worry onto other people and assume that they don't find us attractive because of our weight. Often, our weight isn't the problem at all - it is that we don't look happy or confident. We dismiss opportunities by thinking "Of course, he can't really mean that" or "He would never really be interested in ME!" I've gone through the last 10 years of being in and out of the "dating" mood. For various reasons, there have been times when I simply haven't wanted the complications of a relationship and haven't been in the right mood for more casual "hookups". When that happens, I seem to close myself off from others, don't respond to the invitation in someone's eyes and the opportunities for dating just disappear. When I am ready to date again, I make a point of opening my eyes to the people around me and it usually doesn't take that long before I have what I want (be it a casual or more serious relationship). The "make eye contact and smile" thing works on so many levels and it should be done to EVERYONE around you, not just the man you might be interested in. This works because: 1) You will make more friends by being more open and friendly. This increases your social circle and gives you more chances to meet Mr Right. 2) It makes you more approachable to someone who might be interested. If you get a reputation for being open and friendly, that shy guy in the corner just might muster up the courage to say hi to you. 3) It tells people that you are confident and happy with yourself - who wants to approach someone who looks miserable? Extra tip for that really cute guy you saw in the cafe/bar/wherever: If you catch his eye, give a sideways glance, small smile and (if you can pull it off) wink :girl_hug: That "joking conspiratorial glance" can make a "secret connection" that will do wonders in boosting his confidence and may make the difference between him approaching you and him wistfully thinking maybe he should have... Of course, ideally, we should have the confidence to make the approach ourselves but that's a lot easier said than done...baby steps eh?

Well I told the doc that I wasn't feeling the desperate need for a fill but could eat a full cup of food fairly comfortably and sometimes a little more but after that had to stop. He ended up putting in only 1cc, which is half the usual 2cc at a first fill. I felt a little tighter that day but by the evening was feeling exactly the same as before. The doc said I should be on liquids for the next 2-4 days depending on how well I tolerated things. I did do liquids on the first day but went back to mushies on day 2 and normal food again on day 3 and haven't had a problem since. He didn't seem to think the port bruising was a problem, although I am still a little worried about that, as sometimes it does feel like I am tearing stitches loose. It has been better lately though, so I am going to just muddle along. I don't particularly want to feel super tight restriction, as I can live without the PB'ing and getting stuck that others seem to be suffering. I've not had a single episode of that and am quite happy about that. Right now I can eat anything at all - rice, bread, red meat, etc - but am happy on 1-1.5 cups of food per meal. I think I might lose a little faster if it were only 0.5-1 cup, but I'm scared that if I go for that level of restriction, I'll end up with the other problems to go with it. So far, I've not found it at all hard to stick to healthy foods, but then again, I never was a chocoholic or a fan of junk food. I've had my moments with those of course, but my main problem as always been portion control (ie eating enough for 3-4 people at the evening meal), so I'm grateful that this stops me from doing that. What do you guys think? What's the big rush to get total restriction? When people say that without that tight sensation, they can eat "anything", do they really mean they can go back to eating the enormous meals they used to consume? Or is it just if they are feeling any level of hunger, they find it hard to make the right choices in what they eat? In the past, I have usually eaten to the point of pain - stuffed myself so much that I usually have to lie on the couch and groan for an hour or so after a meal until it goes down. I find I actually miss that kind of pain but I do get a similar sensation when I try to go over a cup - just higher up in my stomach. It doesn't feel "stuck", just FULL!

ARGH!!! :biggrin: I work on a remote mine site and we have to pack our lunch in the camp each day, as there are no canteen facilities on site. I can't face eating at 5:30am and usually pack Breakfast as well, then eat it at around 8am (I start at 6am). I couldn't believe it when I went to get my brekkie out and there it was GONE!!! The cleaners have to go through the fridge each day and mark any plastic bags with lunch inside with an X and then throw out all the ones marked with X's from the previous day. I guess she just got my bag mixed up with the others and tossed it by accident. I know it's a silly thing to get upset about but I damn near cried! I was really looking forward to that poached egg for breakfast and I had grapes (GRAPES!!) for lunch - do you know how rare it is for us to have grapes instead of boring old apples and oranges on site? Now I have to finish out a 12 hour shift before I can get back to camp for dinner :mad:.

I guess it is different for everyone, but for me that regain/stuck time lasted about 10 days, in which I regained 3lb quite quickly and then lost/regained 1lb a day. As I came off mushies and got into eating more solid food, increasing from around 600 cal a day to around 800, my weight started to drop again before I had a fill. I think it is still dropping now (post-first fill), but I don't know as right now I don't have access to a set of scales.

I too am in the big boobed corner (anywhere from an 18E to a 22G, depending on the weight, currently 20F) and I know I'm going to need a lift when I've reached goal. Already, they point due south and without the fat gut to prop them up, that's not going to get better. However, unlike many of the ladies who've commented so far, I LIKE my big boobs. They've always been part of my identity and a source of confidence. Even when I've been at my fattest and feeling horribly unattractive, I've always been able to kid myself that if I round em up in a decent bra and put them out there, guys will focus on those and ingore the huge tummy and fat arms (lol - yeah, I know it's a dream, but it fools me at least). I really want to perk them up again but I'm terrified of losing too much off them and having horrible scarring. Because they are so droopy, I know it is going to take some pretty major reconstruction to lift them up again and that would be so much easier if I went down to a C or D cup, but I don't know if I would even recognise myself below an E PS: Don't you just love the way boobs float in Water? Swimming in the pool is the one time I feel happy about the shape of my boobs. They need to invent a portable aquarium or something that one can wear in place of a bra and have perky pool boobs all the time!! Hahahah! :biggrin:

Yup, ditto!

While I can agree that it is annoying to read "why aren't I losing?" from those who then admit that they are eating too much or eating wrong foods, not exercising, etc, I think some people are being a little harsh in their judgements of those asking "why aren't I losing?" in the post-op period. I started reading in this forum in Sept/Oct and read thousands of posts and threads in the time up to my operation. I read just about the entire pre-op/post-op faqs, the complications sections, support sections and more. I thought I was really well-prepared and thoroughly understood the process that I would go through. I was wrong. Somehow, in all my reading, I had missed the information about the plateau/regain pattern that most people seem to experience in the post-op period. I had read thread after thread about it but still didn't really get it until it happened to me. All the replies seemed to focus on "well you don't have restriction yet", so I took that as meaning that people without restriction had gone back to eating their pre-op huge meals and that was causing the stall. I didn't know that I would hit this plateau, even when following the rules to the letter! I don't know how I missed that information, because AFTER I got caught by that and posted about it, I suddenly started seeing similar threads everywhere that gave the full picture. Maybe it was a blind spot and I just didn't want to see the "negative picture" - I don't know. Also, when I was asking about my plateau, I also admitted that I was one of those people who made an error in judgement and ate something I wasn't supposed to (in my case, chicken at about 10 days post-op). I was only out by a few days by MY surgeon's rules and it didn't seem that big a deal to me, as I did all the chew, chew, chew things and took it really slowly with no lasting effects. However, I got absolutely slammed by several people and told I would cause slippage, permanent damage, etc, etc. In terms of computer forums, this is one of the biggest I've ever seen and there is a LOT of information in here for people to digest and assimilate. It doesn't surprise me at all that people miss information and ask the same "stupid" questions over and over. Hunting among the thousands of threads can be very intimidating when one first comes in and if the question you want to ask isn't visible in the first index page, it seems easier to just ask again and hope that a sympathetic person will respond. In my case, that post-op stall made me so frustrated that I slipped up - one time! I got back on track immediately and eventually worked out that the plateau was normal and not because I was doing something wrong. What made it particularly irritating was that the person who slammed me the hardest was banded a week after I was and was still in the 2-3 days post-op where most people don't feel hungry. After ripping into me, she then posted her own call out for sympathy, when she hit the same wall 10 days later. Poetic justice is good :biggrin: Anyway, sorry for ranting but I do feel that some of us aren't giving others enough of a break as they come to terms with this radically life-changing procedure.

One thing that helps put this in perspective is to look down at the bottom of this thread to the "Similar Threads" section and see just how many other ones there are with the same title and exactly the same worries. You are not alone, mate, and at 2lb a week are really doing well in the average scheme of things.

Oh now there's a dream!! I haven't worn high heels in years and years and years. I managed to put a pair on for my daughter's wedding 4 years ago (for the first time in ages) and my feet were KILLING me within about half an hour. Haven't even tried since then. *sighs* One day...

*BIG HUGS* Now relax, hon! What you are feeling is absolutely normal. You WILL be able to eat normal food again, you just have to get through the healing process first. I don't know what your post-op diet is, but they all follow the same pattern (although the time frames differ wildly from doctor to doctor) and soon you will be able to take thicker liquids, nourishing Soups, then mushies and back to solid foods. As this happens, you will feel better and better. WARNING: Don't be surprised if, in a couple of days time as you transition into thick fluids and mushies, you stop losing and even regain a pound or two over the next few weeks. This happens to most of us and it can be very discouraging but again, it is NORMAL and seems to happen regardless of how much you are eating. That plateau should end as you start to get back onto solid food and it will start to go down again. You may even feel very hungry until you get your first fill, but you should find that you are satisfied on much less than previously and it will get easier and easier as you get closer to the "sweet spot" with your fills. Good luck on your journey!

Some bands start out with some fill in them, although most don't, so maybe it's not that weird. It does seem odd to add to the baseline at only 3 days out though. I think the shoulder pain is a hangover of gas pain, coming back at this late stage because of your problems with your fill. Try some gas strips or search this forum for "shoulder pain" and you should get hundreds of threads giving advice on what do do. I didn't have the problem and I'm in Aus so our brand names don't match yours, so I can't be of more use, sorry.

I go from the every day obsession to the once-a-week recording and back again every week. I work on a remote mine site on an 8 day on/6 days off shift and when I'm home, I weigh myself every morning without fail and often several times a day (only the lowest counts!!). That is a continuing source of frustration as my weight does fluctuate a couple of pounds a day due to fluids, etc. When I'm away on site, I don't have access to scales, so have to just tough it out till I get home. It's a great feeling when I get home and can see the results of a week in one go. I wish I could just make do with once a week, even when I'm home, but I just can resist it on a daily basis when I'm there.

I am one (of the many, I'm sure) who loathes exercise, but one thing I've usually been comfortable doing is swimming. I work on a mine site in the far north of Western Australia) and it is just too damned hot (even at 4:30am!) to go outside walking, so I've been swimming in the camp pool after work at night. It took me a week but I have gotten up to doing 1km of laps each night, using a mix of breaststroke, backstroke and overarm/crawl. It usually takes me about 40 minutes to do this and I was planning on stepping up the pace and taking fewer breaks until I could do it all at a brisk pace non-stop, before stepping up the distance. When I am home in Perth (3,000km further south), I can handle walking in the early morning or late evening, as it is cooler then. Currently I've been doing 2.5km about 3-4 times per week, each walk taking exactly 30 mins. Everyone else that reports their exercise routine seems to be doing things like an hour of hard cardio 6 times a week or similar. So is 1km per night swimming or 2.5km every 2nd day walking enough? Or should I be trying for more? Do I have to keep increasing the times/distances to keep getting benefit from it, or can I just stick to the current routine?

Ok folks, I can understand the offence if someone was to say "You would be pretty if you lost weight." but when they are saying stuff like "You are pretty and would be even prettier if you lost weight" or even compliments like "you have beautiful skin" or "you have a great personality", finding ways to twist that into an insult is your own insecurities talking. Just what WOULD be acceptable as a compliment? Or don't you think you deserve any, so you treat them all with suspicion? How can anyone win against that attitude?

Hi to all you singles I just thought I'd poke my head in here and introduce myself. I'm currently that wonderful trio of fair, fat and over forty but I'm working on the middle one! :ohmy: I've been essentially single for 14 years now and, while I'm generally fine with it, I guess I'm getting a little lonely lately. For those of you waiting to lose weight before you get into the dating game, DON'T WAIT!! I started my single life at only 160lb (up from 125lb at marriage) and spent the first 4 years "putting on my fat suit" in response to the crappy marriage. After 4 years of absolute celibacy and stuffing my face, I opened the door to dating and discovered that, even though I was well over 200lb by then, fat chicks get dates too! It's all in the confidence - which I know is our biggest weakness, because who feels confident when they feel fat? Since then, I have dated on and off, growing larger every year, but my "success rate" has always been tied to my current head space. My size has never been the issue. When I am open to dating and receptive and responsive to people, the dates come. When I am in my "nup, wanna be left alone!" moods, they disappear like magic. So anyway... not trying to lecture or pretend I know the answers (coz I DON'T!!) ...just trying to give those who are "waiting for the day" a little push to get out there right now! Make eye contact and smile at everyone, regardless of who they are, and someone will notice and say hi to you!

I think you have it absolutely right, Weetsin. Before I got banded, I had read many posts about people not feeling restriction before their first fill and had attributed the plateaus and stalling they were experiencing to them overeating because of that. When I went through it, I couldn't understand why because I was sticking really closely to the "rules" and was on only 300-400 cal a day! Naturally, at about the end of Week 3 dietwise (about 10 days post-op), I did my usual "**** it! I'm having chicken wings!!" I felt horribly guilty over that and went back on plan the next day but still didn't lose anything for the next 10 days or so. It wasn't until I started in on thicker mushies and solids that my scales started moving down again. I really wish I had understood this phase before I went through it, but in spite of me reading here almost every day for the 2 months prior to my op, I somehow didn't see that information or just didn't take it in. There should be a huge warning sign that says "Most of you WILL stall or regain in Week 3-4, no matter what you do!! Just work through it and it will come good again."

You have your youth on your side, hon. Many women bounce back after pregnancy with no wrinkly belly, so you should have a fair chance of success too. As for the stretch marks, well...they too will fade - lots of Vitamin E cream does help.