Carin Boyer

An important aspect of learning to love the new you in the mirror is creating a personal style that flatters the woman you are becoming! While experimenting with new styles and fashions is fun, the time and money you will need to create and maintain a wardrobe over a 100 major weight loss period can be daunting! To help you avoid making the same mistakes I did, here is a brief list of pot holes to avoid. 1) Not making adjustments to the size clothing you wear early in your weight loss- Clothing that is too loose or badly fitting can exaggerate rather than slim the body's silhouette. As little as 15 pounds can determine whether a garment will eye-catchingly drape or unappealingly droop on your frame. Selecting styles which will adjust to a changing figure can stretch the period over which clothing can be worn. 2) Selecting unflattering and/or dark colors - We have all heard that wearing dark colors, particularly black, will make us appear thinner. The truth is that the silhouette, proportion and fit of a garment all make more difference than the color ever will. Simply put, there is no one size fits all and everyone does not look good in black. Most people look better in a set of colors which complement their individual skin, hair and eye undertones and which typically does not include black. Once that color scheme is identified you can confidently purchase clothing which will look beautiful on you individually. 3) Wearing clothing inappropriate to your age, thinking that age appropriate clothes will appear frumpy-I personally know how bad an idea that can be! I gained weight in my early 40's and as I lost weight in my 50s I was attracted to particular skirt styles and dress types both in lengths which were more appropriate to how I had dressed in my30's, the age at which I had been able to wear them last. Because I had worn large sized unfashionable clothing during the period in my life when I likely would have been adjusting to a more grown up wardrobe, I was unaware that wearing those earlier styles made me look as if I were trying to look 30 again. Dressing age appropriately does not mean you have to look frumpy, it is possible to find clothing which will be attractive and alluring on a more mature woman. 4) Buying clothes inconsistent with your current lifestyle - by the time I reached by goal I held a responsible position in a financial institution with a conservative (unpublished, but implicit) dress code. Some of the clothing I selected, because I both liked it and found I could wear it, was brightly-colored or ultra-feminine and not always appropriate to my workplace. While it is okay to have some 'fun' clothes which are either more alluring or casual, you should dress for work in a style consistent with your place of business, and save the casual wear for extracurricular events. 5) Waiting until the end of your weight loss to discard clothing which is now too big. There were numerous times during the two years it took me to reach my goal where every little bit of positive reinforcement I could get was needed to keep me on the straight and narrow path. Being able to toss out the old clothes can symbolize a 'no going back' mentality and reinforce the behaviors necessary to ensure that your reach your goal. 6) Spending too much money on your transition clothing - it is not necessary to build an entire wardrobe from scratch each time you go down one size or to spend a fortune on designer clothing at each stage of your weight loss. Nor should you limit your purchases to Target and KMart until you reach your goal weight. There are a number of ways to manage the expense of maintaining a stylish, well-fitting wardrobe during your weight loss period. I made all these mistakes and more. By the time I’d reached my goal weight, I had spent a lot of money and wasted countless hours buying clothing and accessories! I had no idea how to create my own, personal style. That was a luxury I never allowed myself when I was overweight. I had to learn the basics of building an image using fit, color, proportion, and style from square one. At that point, I decided to call in a professional, and I hired my first image consultant; she changed everything. She taught me ways to reduce the time, effort and expense of creating my new look. She helped me match my outside self to the way I felt on the inside. I loved how simply wearing the right clothes and accessories made me feel. It really helped me acknowledge my own, personal transformation, and encouraged me to dig deeper and work harder on me. I loved the process of working with an image consultant so much that I decided to become one! I believe style is more than the just the way you look on the outside. It’s also the way you feel and think on the inside. Your personal style is a statement about who you are, what you think, and how you live. It’s the energy you project to others and should reflect how you to live in the world. Every day, I have the privilege of helping women just like you create and communicate their personal style—through the beginning, middle and end of their transformations. Are you ready to emerge as the woman you truly are, inside and out? Then don’t wait another second. Call me and set up a time to discuss how I can help you create your new look, and your new life.

Thanks to all for comments on this article. To those who asked if anyone should spend so much on clothes during and after weight loss surgery, the answer is that I do not recommend it! Several factors contributed to my spending so much on my transition wardrobe. As a number of readers correctly guessed, where I lived (New York City) and the type of work I did (corporate executive type job in a well known financial services, think banking, company)during my weight loss period had a lot to do with it. We were expected to dress in a formal professional, very sophisticated style. The clothes I thought I needed in order to dress appropriately tended to expensive, and at the time, I thought I had to have a complete wardrobe each time I changed sizes. Now I know that with some planning it would have been possible to buy stylish clothing much less expensively, and by selecting the items with an eye toward versatility, fewer of them. As some of you have pointed out, shopping in thrift stores, and looking for sale items are ways to minimize the expense of adjusting your wardrobe during a major weight loss. Tailoring some of the more expensive items can also keep your costs down. Unfortunately, during my weight loss, I didn't have a workable strategy and it proved very costly. These days, I take my own advice, considering my personal style, my lifestyle, and my budget as I plan my wardrobe. Several people commented that they have their own personal styles and that they wouldn't want to change. Knowing what your fashion preferences are, and staying true to them are both essential to presenting your best self to the world. What image consultants can do is help you refine your style so that it remains consistent both with the person you are and the roles you need to play in your life, whether in your professional life or in social settings, all the while looking fabulous. The very reasons I chose this career! I am interested in your comments, so keep the conversation going!

To help you avoid making the same mistakes I did, here is a brief list of pot holes to avoid. 1) Not making adjustments to the size clothing you wear early in your weight loss- Clothing that is too loose or badly fitting can exaggerate rather than slim the body's silhouette. As little as 15 pounds can determine whether a garment will eye-catchingly drape or unappealingly droop on your frame. Selecting styles which will adjust to a changing figure can stretch the period over which clothing can be worn. 2) Selecting unflattering and/or dark colors - We have all heard that wearing dark colors, particularly black, will make us appear thinner. The truth is that the silhouette, proportion and fit of a garment all make more difference than the color ever will. Simply put, there is no one size fits all and everyone does not look good in black. Most people look better in a set of colors which complement their individual skin, hair and eye undertones and which typically does not include black. Once that color scheme is identified you can confidently purchase clothing which will look beautiful on you individually. 3) Wearing clothing inappropriate to your age, thinking that age appropriate clothes will appear frumpy-I personally know how bad an idea that can be! I gained weight in my early 40's and as I lost weight in my 50s I was attracted to particular skirt styles and dress types both in lengths which were more appropriate to how I had dressed in my30's, the age at which I had been able to wear them last. Because I had worn large sized unfashionable clothing during the period in my life when I likely would have been adjusting to a more grown up wardrobe, I was unaware that wearing those earlier styles made me look as if I were trying to look 30 again. Dressing age appropriately does not mean you have to look frumpy, it is possible to find clothing which will be attractive and alluring on a more mature woman. 4) Buying clothes inconsistent with your current lifestyle - by the time I reached by goal I held a responsible position in a financial institution with a conservative (unpublished, but implicit) dress code. Some of the clothing I selected, because I both liked it and found I could wear it, was brightly-colored or ultra-feminine and not always appropriate to my workplace. While it is okay to have some 'fun' clothes which are either more alluring or casual, you should dress for work in a style consistent with your place of business, and save the casual wear for extracurricular events. 5) Waiting until the end of your weight loss to discard clothing which is now too big. There were numerous times during the two years it took me to reach my goal where every little bit of positive reinforcement I could get was needed to keep me on the straight and narrow path. Being able to toss out the old clothes can symbolize a 'no going back' mentality and reinforce the behaviors necessary to ensure that your reach your goal. 6) Spending too much money on your transition clothing - it is not necessary to build an entire wardrobe from scratch each time you go down one size or to spend a fortune on designer clothing at each stage of your weight loss. Nor should you limit your purchases to Target and KMart until you reach your goal weight. There are a number of ways to manage the expense of maintaining a stylish, well-fitting wardrobe during your weight loss period. I made all these mistakes and more. By the time I’d reached my goal weight, I had spent a lot of money and wasted countless hours buying clothing and accessories! I had no idea how to create my own, personal style. That was a luxury I never allowed myself when I was overweight. I had to learn the basics of building an image using fit, color, proportion, and style from square one. At that point, I decided to call in a professional, and I hired my first image consultant; she changed everything. She taught me ways to reduce the time, effort and expense of creating my new look. She helped me match my outside self to the way I felt on the inside. I loved how simply wearing the right clothes and accessories made me feel. It really helped me acknowledge my own, personal transformation, and encouraged me to dig deeper and work harder on me. I loved the process of working with an image consultant so much that I decided to become one! I believe style is more than the just the way you look on the outside. It’s also the way you feel and think on the inside. Your personal style is a statement about who you are, what you think, and how you live. It’s the energy you project to others and should reflect how you to live in the world. Every day, I have the privilege of helping women just like you create and communicate their personal style—through the beginning, middle and end of their transformations. Are you ready to emerge as the woman you truly are, inside and out? Then don’t wait another second. Call me and set up a time to discuss how I can help you create your new look, and your new life.

Knowing what we really look like after WLS can take longer than the weight loss itself. I had my Lap Band Surgery in August 2008. Over 2 years I lost 100 pounds, going from 235 to 135. Even at my heaviest, I was interested in fashion. But I found it difficult to find attractive, fashionable clothing that flattered my fuller frame. As I lost weight, I was thrilled that I could buy clothing in 'regular' sizes and shop in all types of stores. Being able to select from a broader set of choices though didn't guarantee that I would make good ones. After 20 years as size 22, I didn't know what would look good on me as a 50 year old size 8! So I made some less than ideal selections. Unflattering colors, cuts, styles, bad fits, insufficient undergarments etc. But it wasn't because I had bad taste. It was because I didn't have an accurate picture of what I looked like, my so-called self image, so I couldn't dress myself to look my best! That ultimately came by trial and error. Now I realize I didn't really know what I looked like and what would flatter me until at least 2 years after I had completed my weight loss!! So long story short, I think we need to have some compassion for ourselves and our fellow WLS pilgrims, because real success involves so much more than just the pounds we leave behind. Carin Boyer, Founder, Thin Side Out Style info@ThinSideOutStyle.com

I had surgery almost 7 years ago, and lost 100 lbs during the first 2 years and kept it off. It took at least 2 years or more after I had completed the weight loss for me to have a mental picture at the new weight of what I looked like (my body image) that was accurate. No matter how good we look after we lose the weight we tend to downplay it or doubt it. Most of us spent many years at our heavy weights and have difficulty replacing the picture in our heads of how we looked at that weight with the image of what we look like at our new slimmer weight. Making sure that you wear clothes that flatter your new silhouette will work wonders for your self confidence. I found that until I acquired clothes that fit, were a good color and cut for me, I didn't know how fabulous the new me really could look. If you aren't sure what clothing looks good on the new you, enlist the help of anexpert, a stylist or image consultant. They will be able to see the slimmer you and find styles that are right for you. Taking pictures is another key to self acceptance. The mirror doesn't seem to work. But pictures don't lie. Take pictures of the new you in attractive, well-fitting clothes and share them with people you trust. Get their opinion. Eventually, what you look like will begin to take hold in your mental images of yourself. Carin Boyer ThinSideOutStyle.com

Alex, I would love to coordinate a chapter in the Park Slope/Cobble Hill/Carroll Gardens/Boerum Hill Area for Bariatric Pal. I have been organizing a similar meeting via MeetUp for about a year. We met in Manhattan. I can tell you there is a demand for face to face contact, and although they have tried, the medical community can't provide enough or the specific type of support that patient organized meetings provide. I am researching the certification you listed. Please let me know if I can help your efforts in any way.