Chelle B

Shoulda/coulda/woulda - nonsensical words which have no basis in reality. Because they are all PAST tense. At one time, it was very difficult to see who the "bullies" really were - you must agree with that. And you have no idea what efforts I may have made privately to resolve issues. I do know, and have all the emails and PM's to validate it. There are many ways to stop the bully - it doesn't have to be a public free for all. I wish we lived close enough to get to know each other. We could just talk and enjoy a healthy debate. Although it would be a long debate, since there is that whole "who gets the last word" concept.... (and I need to look up those drinks you like -maybe I will try them in your honor. Jack and Coke for years, then mostly margaritas if I do drink. Might be good to try something new occasionally). Humor is a great part of who I am. I would probably shock you if I told you some of the times that I used humor to deal with horrific situations. But it was all that I had in my arsenal at the time. All that I've said over the last several days is in no way a defense of my past behaviors - I am no angel and never claimed to be. I am intensely loyal to my friends, with LaraNicole being closer than a sister to me. She is someone I will stand up and defend to the end - she means a lot to me. So yeah I can be sarcastic, blunt, sweet, funny, annoying, boring, whatever. All I can do is to look forward and try to have the next day be a better one. I would go into my ZEN philosophy but that is indeed a new post. Thanks for listening (or reading, to be more accurate).

Wow, Lauren, "members" of a group = plural???? I would never have guessed. Thank you for the lesson. Support has so many other implications than the newbie saying "I need help". Why do you want to lecture me on my manner of speaking when you are doing exactly the same thing? That's what I don't get. I've never had a problem with you at OH - why do you want to create a problem when none exists? And you know what? I am using this R&R forum appropriately. Just as you are. Get over it.

I understand. I really do. I waited for a long long time for an apology or acknowledgment when I was wronged on OH. I sent a PM asking about it so that I could at least understand. It divided people. But no response to me ever. And you know what, it freakin' still bugs me. And the fact that it bugs me, well that bugs me even more! Ask me about anybody else, just not Sandy or Wendell. I will most likely answer it openly. Hey and if we ever meet up, as some of us did in Reno, well I am sure you will hear me tell more than you ever want to hear. But not here, not in writing. For me to stand up and say anything (and you can't be sure just what I would say) would open the door to even more grief on many sides. That is why I made the commitment to put it behind me. I hope you can understand. Thanks.

Rants and Raves seems to be where the most entertaining posts are, and I mean that seriously. I just want to move forward from all the Sandy talk. I don't CARE anymore about what happened before. I just want to be able to actively participate in LBT, not just the R&R section. This is a huge place with many interests. Why do you continue to push? Is it so that I will leave? If that is it, just say so. And thanks for inviting Work - she is an amazing person in real life too. I promise I can be a nice person.

My loving father-in-law, seeing me after losing 75-80 lbs, when we went to dinner at Outback Steakhouse. "Well, Chelle, last year you wouldn't have fit in this booth at all!" Loudly. I, uh, guess that was a compliment?

Eminem, The Way I Am

Like I said, I just want to NOT be lumped in with a group that gets so much abuse. You can't expect me to just sit idly by and be pointed out as part of the herd, any herd. This is a great forum and I'd like to enjoy it without having to love everybody, or renounce anybody.

<sigh> I knew that...

1) My arms and legs would be proportionate. My arms are short and my legs are long, so suits have to be altered. 2) I'd like to just be 'in the moment' more often. I live in overdrive and can't do anything without multi-tasking. 1a) Physically my younger DH is hot and perfect! Maybe have thicker hair where the family bald spot is. 2a) Have his A.D.D. go away so that he wouldn't need meds.

At some point, when I get closer to goal, I will most likely eat one solid meal a day around mid-day. I also hate to cook or take the time to eat a meal. I'd rather go out to lunch with friends for a real meal, and then just get my liquids in the rest of the day (with enough protein of course). Builder Protein Bars are helpful for getting the protein in. I've generally been able to eat at any time without problems. This recent fill may change that.

You are so wrong in that. I came over here because I've been told that this is a lively and fun place to get support. I just happen to overall enjoy the R&R forum the most - I mean - who wouldn't? This is a unique group of people. I also know a few of the people here and have great respect for them - they no longer post on OH and I'd like to stay in touch. I don't want to change anything or anybody - I just don't want to be lumped in with the herd. It works both ways.

#1 I am NOT "you guys". I am just me. #2 I referred to ONE person, who gave me the ONE reason she left the board. In no way did I make this all-encompassing. Just someone going through a rough time who needed our support. #3 I could have sworn somebody over here told me this was a caring, supportive group of people. So far I have seen little of that - please show me that the pack mentality doesn't exist over here.

Darn, I did it again. I gotta keep my mouth shut over here.:faint:

Bitter Beauty

I don't believe in moderating by shutting someone up - I have 5 sisters - debate is healthy!

Oh man, my band is way too tight to handle that thought!

OH doesn't really have moderators. I volunteered my services at no cost, and was politely declined as not needed.

uh, but I do most of my shopping online....

Size 12, coming soon to a store near CHELLE!

There are also lots of OH posts like this one, old and newbies alike, and no fuss about protein shakes because it is a clear question and clear responses. No SnW debating. It can happen. LAP-BAND® System Forum

Caeli was a strong supportive member of OH, with personal issues outside her control. She is *not* the person I was referring to, btw, just someone who is very special. She left OH for a very long time because the person you refer to "mocked her, taunted her and humiliated her", in her words. She posted asking for support about very personal issues, while she was in a fragile state, and something hurt her badly. I never asked for details - if I don't know them I can't repeat them. I just know that when I tried to convince her to return for the support she wanted, she was so hesitant. She made a few small steps in that direction and now we rarely see her online. She is someone who did help many people, and now needs the support of understanding friends. That sux. About the stupid freaking protein debate. I just got tired of having the subject shoved down our throats daily. Everyone seems to be in agreement that we should eat solid protein first, the veggies, then complex carbs if we have room. Protein shakes are not a good recommendation for people to get around being too tight and avoiding solids. Protein shakes as a supplement for those who are too tight to eat in the mornings, or those who need added protein - this is not an issue with me. If you pay attention to OH as closely as I think you do, you will see that I rarely get involved in that discussion anymore because I am sick of it. Talk about a clique? How can you deny the cliquish behaviors of the I-love-protein-shakes-and-my-doc-says-it's-ok team? Frankly I see little difference, so I choose to stay away from it. Darn you for coaxing me into saying this much.:eek:

It definitely is revealing when a new member posts asking where is "whoever has been stirring things up". Another reveal of on ill person's troll posts is giving advice to newbies BEFORE the troll was banded. The clique comments have always bothered me, because having long term friendships with people is not being part of a clique. It is simply friendship and common interests. I pass on a lot of posts because they are off topic and out of my interest area - doesn't mean I have any negative feelings at all - just not interested.

I think too many folks just feel that if they need to know something, the doc will tell them. And we all know that doesn't happen as it should. Overall, I agree in that most of the advice given, even from the two most named people on the boards, is generally fine. The method of delivery is often annoying, but not harmful. What I like best about boards is that someone can ask a question, and get a variety of answers - and the responses generally have a common theme and will guide the person appropriately.

You go, girl, get it out of your system!

In theory, yes, but you know as well as I do that there are some pit bulls who won't let go of things. I used to recognize this person on OH often, until she told me why she left. Then I realized that it was yet another personality conflict and we sure didn't need another one over there! She knows the impact she made on my life, and I have referred others to her privately when I think her particular experiences would be helpful. Do this defeat the concept of a public forum? Of course it does, but I have to choose my own battles. Maybe if I weren't in such a high stress job, I would be different here. Forums, the good ones, are my sanctuary and I want to protect that. "Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth." -Alan Watts