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“Daddy, why do you have such a big belly?” innocently asked by my precocious five year old Son Connor, that was the spark that lit the fuse to my deciding to change my life. Sometimes we need not be shouted at to be shaken from a slumber. Sometimes a whisper is louder than a shout. A few months back, I was walking through life in a perpetual haze. I believed I was a happy individual, I am surrounded by a loving Wife, amazing children, and a diverse and loving group of friends & family. I was however overlooking the fact that I was physically careening down a slope at breakneck speed. I have always been a large, “big-boned”, individual. For most of my adult life I was able to deflect my rapidly increasing waist line by using self-deprecating humor and sarcasm as a protective shield. I was the definition of the happy go lucky fat man. I was the go to BBQ guy, the first to crack a beer with you, the first to grab that extra slice of pizza; I began to believe it was what was expected of me. At least I told myself that as a pathetic excuse to allow myself to continue to indulge in excess. Over the years, many people have expressed disbelief when I revealed my weight when asked. I often hear things like, you carry it so well, there is no way you weigh that much…as if I would choose to add extra pounds for some reason. I incorporated this as a defense mechanism, and lied repeatedly to myself that my weight wasn’t that bad. On the inside, I was fighting every day to try and do the “right thing”, and try to somewhat live a healthy lifestyle. I knew what to eat, how to eat, when to eat…but choosing to follow what I knew would work was not something I could do for an extended period of time. I am not ashamed to say that I was weak in spirit, I had no will power, and realistically I still don’t. But, I knew I was treading into uncharted territory, weight wise. I was easily winded, my knees creaked, my back hurt, and that doesn’t cover my fear of what might possibly be going on that I couldn’t physically feel. I tried to play in a flag football tournament and failed miserably, I dreaded carrying my own Daughter to bed; even kneeling by the tub to bath the kids was a nightmare. So, when my Son asked me that simple question, and I had no intelligent answer, only excuses, I decided enough was enough. I am not above asking for help, I am honest with myself, and I knew that the changes I wanted to make, I could not make alone. I decided to explore Bariatric surgery as a tool to help me save my life. After considering the several options available, I decided that Lap Band surgery would be the best fit for me. Once I made that decision, and embraced it, my mind turned to the endless possibilities that would stand before me. The truth is I am not changing to look good on the beach, or to wear a certain pant size. Yes, truth be told, these will be wonderful benefits of changing my lifestyle, but there are three reasons for my wake up call. My Wife & my kids, there it is, the definitive reason. The reason that I breathe, the reason that I wake up every morning, the reason why I will do whatever is needed to give them the best of me that I possibly can. Now, I expected to meet some resistance to my decision, and I have not been disappointed in that regard. Some people see weight loss surgery as cheating, or as an easy way out, that you don’t have the will power needed to do it on your own. To that I say, then using the gym is cheating, buying $100.00 running shoes is cheating, eating low fat food is cheating, they are all tools to help you get to where you want to go. For someone with food issues, mental, as well as physical, weight loss surgery is nothing but a tool to help you get off to a good start on a new life. It is not a magic trick; you do not have surgery and wake up 70lbs less than the day before. You have to eat right, exercise, make good decisions, just like anyone else trying to live right. Telling someone that weight loss surgery is cheating, is the same as telling an alcoholic that AA is cheating, they are simply tools designed to help you meet a need. I am not trying to fool anyone, especially myself; I do not have the will power to walk this alone. I am not ashamed to say that I need every tool in the box to help me be who I want to be. To be honest with you, I have never been overly concerned with the opinions of others, if I know in my heart that something is right for me, then all else be damned. I know in my heart, that I will be adding years to my life, and I don’t care how I get it done, or how anyone feels about my choice. At the end of the day, I want to look my Wife and kids in the eye, and have them know that Daddy is doing everything in his power to be there for them. I dream of doing the simple things that many overlook, or take for granted, running a 5K, playing sports with my kids, carrying my sleeping Daughter up a flight of stairs without wincing in pain. I have many inspiring people in my circle, friends, family, especially my Wife, who has shown me that change is possible and given me the blueprint to work off of. I look forward to the day, in the not too distant future, when I can update you all about the new me. For now, I leave you with the latest steps I have taken on the path to living right. Yesterday I began a 2/3 week diet before I have surgery. My Surgeon has submitted the paperwork to my insurance provider and we wait patiently for them to sign off. After that, we will hopefully green light surgery for some point over the next few weeks. I know many of you are privy to my journey; I just wanted to share with as many people as possible, and hopefully inspire others to take the proverbial bull by the horns.

Hey gang, I wanted to touch on a topic that I'm certain that most, if not all, of you have encountered along your journey. That would be the countless number of people that either have horror stories about their Aunt Jenny's neighbor's Cousin's surgery, or the people who encourage you to "just eat less & exercise". Now, I can't speak for anyone but myself, but if I could just eat less & exercise, I would not be signing up for surgery of any sort. Do people really believe that we would sign up for a procedure without doing research, weighing, no pun intended, the risks, and trying to lose weight without surgery before reaching this point?? If I could lose a pound for every ignorant,callous, or generally assanine comment or question I have recieved, I would not need to go forward with surgery. I do realize that there are risks involved, that there is no guarantee of success, and that not everybody has the same results....and yes, I will still be moving forward. Why, you may ask, because it's still a better al;ternative to immobility, disease & especially an early death. I am not angered by such people, merely amused, they do nothing but feed my fire.For those who look upon weight loss surgery as "cheating", I truly feel sympathy for you as a human being. The fact is that I will not wake up and be skinny, I will work my tail off for what I want. That means a post operative world of eating right, plenty of exercise and being in tune with what my body needs. When I complete my first Tough Mudder, or half marathon, I will be way to tired to remember that I "cheated". If anyone else has encountered these people, you have my ear, tell me your story!

I see that I have a lot of friends here that have walked the same road, good to know. I have watched my Wife deal with the haters for the last 2 years, obviously not everyone, but more than enough. I'm always taken aback when people who seem of rather high intelligence spout of some nonsense when it comes to weight loss surgery, or weight loss in general. Personally, I enjoy engaging them, nothing gets my blood flowing like verbally laying out someone's ignorance. I will use thenm for fuel to feed the fire.

Exactly 2much, some of the skinniest people I know, are also the unhealthiest.

Wow, great job, I'm sure you must be proud of how your hard work paid off!

Hey guys, I started my pre-surgery diet on Wednesday, 05/07/14, and as of today, I am down 7.5 lbs. I just wanted to let everyone know that if I can do this, anyone can! My Wife has been a big help, she had the surgery about 2 years ago, and is sharing all her knowledge with me. I'm hoping for a surgery date in the next few weeks, I am so excited to start my new life.