InfiniteButterfly

At least part of mine is genetic...every woman in my family (with very, very few exceptions) have the same body shape and size: too big. Whether it's actual, physical genetics or just the 'way we were brought up'...unhealthy food, unhealthy lifestyles, unhealthy coping mechanisms. That got me to around 200 lbs. My horrible first marriage took me the rest of the way. He was an emotionally crippling and abusive SOB, and I ate to deal with his BS. I ate because I didn't want him to touch me, and I figured the bigger I was, the less likely he was to come near me. I divorced 14 years ago, but more of the damage was done at that point. I couldn't get back on track. Even with a healthy relationship or two, and the support of both hubby and bf, I could eat healthier and be more physically active, but the lingering baggage from that first marriage still held me back. I started counseling shortly prior to making the decision to have surgery, and she suggested that in order to get out of the morass I was in, I needed to take charge of my life. I stepped out and started doing volunteer work and discovered that I actually am a valuable person, and I do matter to people. That I could contribute in a positive way. And that realization made me take charge of more areas of my life. I realized that I needed more tools in my belt to achieve better health, and I started the journey toward surgery. Midway through taking the classes, I also started talking about going back to school...which hubby encouraged me to do (I've been an artist most of my life, but I was very, very limited in my work. I've always wanted to go to art school). I started my first semester at the same time I got my surgery date (handy enough, the online courses are split into eight-week segments, and my surgery fell during Week 7...with the instructor's blessing, I was able to easily finish my work early that week so I would miss nothing for the few days I was in hospital). So..getting healthy, taking charge of my life, moving in a new direction. Becoming the person I was meant to be It all goes hand-in-hand. And even though I'm not seeing the original counselor any longer (I switched to one who specializes in bariatric patients and their special needs), I do credit her with giving me the advice and push I needed to get out and take charge of me.

I've seen a few posters on here mention regretting the surgery in the short-term. I don't know about long-term though. I know short-term, I couldn't be happier with my decision (my only regret is that it's taking so long to get pain-free enough to resume my pre-surgery walking distances...) I still consider it one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.

@@fred2014 Welcome back These forums are a life-saver...inspirational, supportive and non-judgmental. I've found an immense amount of help here just reading through posts, and I know you will too. Good luck on taking charge of your life and getting back on track. I know how difficult life's challenges can be sometimes, but you're taking control and that's the important thing

Have you tried broth? I made chicken soup and strained out the broth the other night. And tonight, I had a bit of (potato broccoli soup pureed to within an inch of it's life and thinned with chicken broth (recipe http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=2124091 ) You can even add a bit of Protein powder to boost the protein.

In the two weeks before I went on the liquid diet, I definitely had a few food funerals. We ordered Chinese one night, and the day before I started the liquid diet, my bf took me out to my favorite sushi restaurant as an early Mother's Day present/preparing for surgery send-off (it's someplace we only go once a year or so because it's expensive, but the gesture was greatly appreciated). I think I gained maybe a pound or two then, but lost 12 during the liquid diet, and my liver was fine at that point. No cravings post-surgery either, which is good

I have Highmark. They require six months monitoring prior to surgery (along with all the other tests. My original surgeon left the bariatric practice I was going through, so that six months turned into nine (I should have had the surgery in February...it was pushed back to May when we got another surgeon in). The clinic here had an information seminar. I set up my consultation and first weight visit that day, along with all of the other appointments I would need (bar the testing immediately prior to surgery, which was set up the day I received my surgery date)

@@keepingmysecrets Bravo for you Honestly? I was a little scared too...but so much more of me wanted this and it is so worth it. Please do keep coming by...there is so much valuable information on the forums that will help alleviate your concerns and help prepare you for your surgery. I am incredibly grateful that I found this place. It helped me immensely in my presurgery prep.

@@MistyAnnMoon829 heh...I just picked up almond milk for the first time today. I will admit I don't pay much attention to soy. I can't have it, so I don't know much about it other than a lot of people use soy products as a protein replacement. I wonder if that's why my NUT mentioned almond milk over soy milk before I even mentioned my intolerance?

I absolutely cannot wait until I can try some of these recipes! I'm only on the full-liquids stage, but I printed off a bunch of recipes from your site. The rest of the family is actually on-board with quite a few of them as well, which is doubly nice

@@keepingmysecrets Hi Nancy I just recently got the VSG surgery after going back and forth with myself for years (the first time I was looking into it, I ended up pregnant with my daughter. After that, the timing just wasn't right for one reason or another until hubby got a new job with new insurance that covers almost everything). I can not tell you what a huge relief it is to finally have gotten the surgery and be moving into my new life. I can't really help with the decision between lap band and sleeve, but the fact that I won't need constant adjustments was part of my reason for going the sleeve route. Much like your situation, my bf does not agree with the surgery. At all. He says he understands why I got it (the health issues, which I was just starting to get), but he's very doctor-phobic and hospital-phobic. He's been really good about my recovery, however, but he does have a lot of the same worries about me that you're expressing for yourself. And frankly, I think he's a little scared that as I get healthier and adopt a more active lifestyle, I will move away from his more sedentary interests and lose my love of gaming (one of the things that brought us together).And if that happens, it will happen. I feel kind of philosophical about it at this point, because I can't change his attitude (nor should I...his feelings have validity to him, and all I can do is tell him how I'M feeling), but I can't let his attitude make my decisions for me. This is about me. My health. My life. Me wanting to be there to watch my daughter graduate, go to college, become a vet (her current dream). I could not do this on my own. I needed another tool (or two...since I'm still in therapy as well, and she's certainly another very good tool in this battle) Either your bf will accept you or he won't. Don't make the decision for him. Make it for you. Ask your surgeon or their staff about local support groups (aka find new friends who will be supportive) Either your old friends will accept the new you or they won't. And having the sleeve doesn't mean you can't go out and eat. It means you can't go out and eat the same foods you were eating. It means finding healthier choices and bringing home leftovers. Or having a few small bites off someone else's entree (as a family, we almost always Celebrate birthdays by going out to a nice restaurant.) And as far as limited choices and feeding on a budget, I feed a family of six on a shoestring budget: a little goes a very long way with what I'm eating (or drinking...I'm on the full-liquids portion of the after-diet) Coupons are your friend for stretching your food dollars as far as they can go. There are a lot of really good recipe sites out there that will keep you on track calorie-wise, and give you some different tastes to avoid the "ugh, not this again" feeling. I found http://twosleevers.com/category/recipes/ and http://bariatricfoodie.blogspot.com/ for two, and I'm really looking forward to trying some of the recipes I've found on there. Inexpensive, but they look really tasty.

I lost a total of 12 lbs during the two weeks pre-op, and I've lost the same in half the time post-op. I think if you stick with it 100%, you should see another few pounds drop before the surgery.

@@onajournee My doctor and NUT both recommended chewables, for vitamins and calcium. No gummies though. And sublingual b-12. It wasn't just the absorption factor, but also because it can be difficult to swallow large pills too soon pre-op (I've seen several people on here mention getting pills stuck)

I'm down a total of 36 lbs, which is fantastic. I started this journey at 310, and I'm now at my lowest point in about 10 years (I think I was around 270 after I gave birth to my youngest. I could be wrong though...it was a while ago) I am slightly irritated that I'm still so swollen that my clothes are not reflecting the loss, and I am frustrated that I can't do much walking because my stomach HURTS (I hit 3300 steps yesterday, which was an accomplishment. Pre-surgery, I was doing 10k steps). I know that I need to give my body time to heal, but I am ready to start MOVING! Last night was a bad night. I was told that "This time last week you still had your whole stomach. I am sad for your missing stomach" and "God gave you a stomach because he wants you to eat." To say I saw red would be an understatement. After the pain I've gone through in the past week, to say things like that just irritate the everloving fuck out of me. And I'm agnostic bordering toward atheism, so saying God did anything is guaranteed to get me to turn a mute ear. By that same token, God gave me a gall bladder for whatever reason (it's been gone 9 years), a thyroid gland (partially gone for 6 years) and reproductive organs (non-functional for 10 years due to surgical intervention). Just because some Big Invisible Friend allegedly gave me something doesn't mean that it works. And when you have something that isn't working as intended, you fix it. My stomach wasn't working as intended, for whatever reason. I had no shut-off, and whether that was physical (I couldn't read hunger cues) or mental (because food=comfort). So I fixed it...with the aid of a surgeon. He and I decided together which surgery would be best for the amount I have to lose, for my general health and for a lot of other little reasons that go into making this kind of momentous decision (I didn't just close my eyes and point to a chart for which surgery I wanted. I thoroughly discussed the options and chose the one that was best suited for my situation) So in closing, don't bother with the pity for my missing stomach. If you want to feel anything for me, feel happy that I took control of my life for a change. Feel happy that I can walk up and down the stairs as intended, without heaving for air at the top or limping up them one step at a time (that is my NSV for today...walking up and down the stairs without pausing and without painfully pulling myself up one step at a time) Be glad that I took this step before my health deteriorated to the point where I would need my hips and knees replaced (my knees...oh my knees...they feel completely different with just this small amount lost. I am SO looking forward to walking longer distances and eventually starting the C25K.)

PB2 was a staple in my pre-surgery shakes. Absolutely love it (in either the chocolate or the vanilla, although definitely better in chocolate). I should have popped a bit into my banana shake this morning.

I found I can easily tell when I'm full on the protein shakes. Now I need to learn to stop before taking that last sip that pushes me to fullness It's just a matter of listening to your body. I found water rarely produces a fullness or satiety now (but if I'm not actually hungry, it does almost instantly quell the false hunger pangs)

I am continuing to work with my therapist post-surgery. We worked together pre-surgery, and I really credit her with how well I am doing post-surgery, because we discussed expectations and goals, moods, etc., and I haven't (yet) fallen into the depression trap that I see a lot of recent post-surgery people mention. Just because of this, I plan to continue seeing her until I've reached goal, because I think it really helps have someone impartial that's familiar with WLS and can help with the emotional rollercoaster post-surgery. Granted, I'm only 7 days out, and not anywhere near goal, but I do think my continued work with her is going to be essential to my success.

@@Roo101769 Your friend starting at a higher weight may have something to do with greater weight loss as well. I've read that those who have more to lose tend to have larger losses compared to those with less to lose. And I've read about men tending to lose faster than women. Ah well...the only one I'm really comparing myself to today is myself yesterday...and as long as today-self is doing better than yesterday-self, I feel pretty good

I have C25K as well, and I'm waiting for my doctor's okay to start it. I'm planning to run on Presque Isle State Park, which has a fantastic trail system. I figure bike to get there, and then do my jog and bike home.

The best powder is the one that tastes good to you. I'm sorry if that's sounds a little flippant, but it's very true. Everyone has different tastebuds and reacts different to the taste of the shakes and powders. For example, I absolutely loathe unjury. I love Chike and Syntrax nectar. See if you can find samples of some different kinds and try them.

This is so much me. Even looking in a mirror, my brain never connected what I saw with 'me'. And I refuse to have my picture taken most of the time, because the person in the pictures isn't me. I don't have a good view on who 'I' am, but I know it's not the fat person I was seeing in the mirror, and I know it wasn't the person struggling to get up and down the stairs. The surgery is the tool I need to enable myself to find the real me. I don't know how I'll feel once I start losing weight, but I'm hoping I get more comfortable with who I am.

I usually go by Toxiclight, as that's my handle pretty much everywhere (my website is under that, and most of my art is produced under Toxiclight Art and Design), but I wanted something different for here. In the few months prior to coming here, I had started designing tattoos, and I drew a whole lot of infinity symbols and butterflies, and I can relate both to this journey. The commitment to a new lifestyle is eternal (infinite), and the butterfly refers to coming out of my cocoon of fat and being the beautiful person I was always intended to be,

Add the pictures to your gallery under the user interface, and you can attach them via the "My Media" button on the toolbar (I had to figure this out yesterday, as I tried uploading to Photobucket and linking the photos, but they were HUGE when I did that)

I actually find it a little scary that I can drink Water this well only a week out. I know my doctor said he runs to the aggressive side when he does the surgery...I worry about leaks and whatnot because things go down well...I'm just not interested in most of them =P But I haven't had any new pains, so I'm guessing I'm just lucky where the water is concerned (I cycle a lot during the summer, and I'd be lost without my Camelback and constant hydration)

Also, what types of food are you grazing on? I would guess it's not what you should be eating. Keep grazeables out of your house. This was one of the hardest ones for my family to adjust to: not having pretzels, chips, etc., in the house because it provided too much temptation for me. Set your times to eat, and if you absolutely MUST have something else, try Water. Gum. Mints. If you need crunch, try veggies with a little dip (there are tons out there and loads more recipes of high-Protein dips that are easy to make) Carrots or broccoli have a lot of crunch, and with some dip, they're pretty tasty.

Beans? They have a lot of protein. There are quite a few soy-based products out there as well that are very good for high protein/low carbs (sadly, I'm soy intolerant, so need to stick with meat as much as possible). Do you like eggs and egg beaters? That's good protein as well (I'm assuming you're looking for sources of protein other than meat?)