Gone4Now

I think it was just 2 pounds. I have a friend who's nearing 300 lbs, went for a bike ride and gained weight. She told me it was muscle weight. Um, no, sweetie - not from a bike ride. I think Jillian's comments were directed for someone who's 300+ and saying that a 2 pound loss in one month was because she gained muscle. All those people at the ranch work out 6-8 hours a day and lose weight...so the chick at home didn't gain muscle. She wasn't doing it. I think it's funny that the 2 pound chick was the one most pissed at Joelle for making excuses. Heck, I go up and down 2 pounds just by drinking a Slimfast.

:patriot: No worries... It's a good question for everyone. I very much appreciate the question and Green's answer. Yeah...I know that logically, but my mother is kind of a nut case. I've spent most of my life bailing her out, and that's after the first half where I was at her mercy. She'd quit her jobs, move us around, yank me in and out of school, put her boyfriends first - to the point where she looked the other way when they were treating me less than kind. I know I should just cut my ties altogether with the woman, but for some reason I can't bring myself to do it. Maybe it's the guilt that she raised me with, or some sick twisted hero complex I have, but I stick around. She helped me a lot when I was pregnant, and I think that I feel like I still owe her for helping me. But, the woman is insane and her financial and emotional problems are a drain on me. DH is upset due to recent events in mom's life that are wearing me down. He thinks she picks me apart piece by piece. I think she's old and cranky and bitter about her choices, and rather than take the blame for anything, she buries her head in the sand until it all goes away (or until someone fixes it for her.) Talking to her doesn't work. I've tried. I still try. We have talks, and she'll hang up on me, change the subject, get up and leave - anything but talk about the truth. She's not really normal, and probably needed therapy decades ago and never got help. She's always the victim, and doesn't understand that she can control her actions. But the whole thing about her actions with DD is the sneakiness. She knows what she was doing, and she knew I wouldn't approve and she did it anyway. I asked DD if grandma was bringing anything and she said no, just apple juice. DH and I were adamant - don't even drink the juice. That's the lure...it's just juice...next it will be toast, then the bacon, then the Cookies again. Ack..I'm getting all grumpy over it again. Point is...she's my mother so I love her. But, I don't like her or respect her. Not all moms are good people. My mother happens to be borderline between decent intentions and outrageous bullshit, and I struggle year to year to detangle myself from her life. I moved from VA to TX and she followed me. She moved across the street. If I wanted to get away, how can I???? No wonder I'm fat, and no wonder I snapped now that I can't turn to food for comfort.

My friends get grumpy with me when I talk about "when I get cancer". All in my immediate family circle who has passed away, has died from cancer. Everyone. The ones living, older than me, have had some form of it. Even my brother had skin cancer cells removed. Some because they smoked, and others - well, just cause. No rhyme or reason to it, so I figured I'll get it, too...it's just a matter of time. For some reason, folks don't like to hear that, or understand why I feel the way I do. They like to tell me I could get hit by a bus instead. Gee, thanks...that's helpful. But, assuming I don't get hit by a bus, I think genetically, I'm prone to cancer. Which, like you Green, is kind of a bummer. I mean, I've been fat, can't I skip the cancer part? Why couldn't everyone be like my cousins by marriage who are thin, pretty, and healthy? With good teeth, too, damn it. At the risk of sounding like my 11-year old...not fair!

Ahhh....man! I didn't watch the show last night and clicked in her by habit...and strange desire to read ahead. I'll still watch the show tonight, though (DVR'd it). I'm glad the silver team went home, though. Bet Joelle wishes she'd taken that 25k, though. :cursing:

So...I was doing well until Sunday. We track our calories, which isn't something I've done before. For 2 weeks we've doing well and then Sunday came, and we had a cheat day. We still tracked our cals - up near 3000 because of the chips/dip. That one day bumped me up 2 pounds. Ugg. I worked so hard to get those 2 pounds off and now I'm back up again just because of one day. We also hit the gym in the morning on Sunday, out of our normal routine because we knew we'd be bad that night. Both of us gained 2 pounds. We're hoping it will fall off easily, but it was still difficult to handle that gain.

I like it because... 1 - It's not blocked at work. 2 - It's a little more grown up. (Meaning simple and easy for a fogie like me to use.) 3 - You can see everyone's status on one page. 4 - It's not so complicated so the page doesn't take forever to load - yet. 5 - I found tons of my high school friends on there because I could easily search for them. 6 - I like the status updates and comments format. 7 - I'm sure there is more, but I can't word it or think of it right now.

Full time, I process import instructions for an oil tools company. Part time, I'm going back to school to be the boss one day of my very own imports group. :redface:

I didn't think I was being subtle....How's this: I triple-dog dare you!

And, I'd like to add what a bummer it is that my brother isn't fat. WTH? Why didn't he have issues with food like I did? He had a chubby phase, then moved right along into adulthood w/no weight issues. Which reminds me...DH decided 2 weeks ago to watch his calories and dropped 10 pounds since then. WTH?!

Oh, Green...I'm really sorry for what you've been through lately. And, Kat, my meals were the same growing up. Mom always color-coded dinner. I guess she thought it was balanced, and really - according to old food pyramids, it was. Mom's and my issues were really deeper...my brother would come in to my room after she was asleep and tell me where she hid the goodies. Then he and I would eat them all. Her favorite spot, the dishwasher, lasted the longest as a hiding place. We weren't very helpful as kids and never did the dishes. She finally got wise and hid them in her room or in her car. Mom started hiding food when she was a kid. She and her sister would get a goody, and mom would hide it until her sister was done, then bring her food out to torture her sister with it. They laugh over stories like that now, but I kinda think it shows the sickness she had with food from an early age. And, of course I learned from her, and I'd hide food under my bed and eat it when everyone else was asleep. I always wondered why she didn't notice. But, then again, between my brother and his friends and me and mine, she probably thought we were all to blame. :eek: Eh! Why is food such an addiction!? DD and I were talking about her choices at school last night and she asked if she could get lemonade at school. I told her maybe on Fridays, but Mon-Thur get the milk or Water. I told her that this isn't about NEVER having these foods again, but not having them every day.

Wow...I'd LOVE to read that thread.

Okay, going off topic here - Anyone not getting email notifications? I haven't gotten emails from lbt in weeks. I have to log in and check my fav threads each day. Anyone else?

Kat, thanks so much! Your posts are always inspiring. :thumbup: DD and I just talked tonight about food choices, weight and diet. We watch Biggest Loser together and she has a friend that is her weight and on a diet. I told her we're not on a "diet"...we're trying to be healthy. I said, "It's not about the number on the scale. If we're eating right, that number will go down. But, it's more that we're eating the things our bodies need, and not too much of what it doesn't." And, as to what FairyFacade said above, it's 100% true: I don't have control over what she eats when she's not with me. And, I'm not sure it's just 2 pcs of toast...I have a slight feeling it's more. I know it's toast and apple juice. I'm not sure what else has been given that they're not telling me. So, another thing I said to DD was it's in her hands. That it's her choice to be healthy or not healthy. It's not going to happen overnight, but I think we're getting there. It was a wake up call for her that I did get so angry at mom for being the "food pusher" and maybe that impressed her a little. This week, we've gone to the gym in the morning together and she's made a great effort to eat fruit for Breakfast and her veggies at dinner. As for lunch...she struggles with school lunches. She'll get the sandwich and not eat the top part of the bun. So, I'm proud that she's making steps, and I've come to accept my own responsibility in this. Bottom line: I'm a fat mom, I was a fat daughter, and now my daughter is fat. It's not something I'm proud of...BUT. We are turning it around. As for mom...I don't have a lot of hope for her. She keeps 3 jars of candy by "her chair" and only gets up to go the bathroom. She's never been active, never eaten healthy and has been obese 1/2 her life. I'm just not sure I'll ever get through to her. I just need to get through to me and DD, and leave the past behind.

Thanks LJM! :bored: I did ask mom if she'd rather bring puzzles or something for them to do in common and she said, "I don't do it for bonding." Okaay. Then WHY do you do it? But, she ended up saying she agreed and she "got it" so, I'm relying on that.

You nailed it! It seems that they're at a crossroads now. The "fat buddy" thing may be the bond they had. Also, even though the silver team annoys me, the one that was at home has such good energy. Her, "C'mon now!" and "I'm doing this!" and "Watch out!" really gets me wanting to work out!

Oh, man! We were cussing out David left and right. I was annoyed by the green team at first (I think just the at home-whiny girl) but Tara kicks butt. I love that she chewed him out. I feel so badly for Dan, but he's lost 100+ so far. I think he'll be able to do it. David...sadly, he'll be one of the 50% that put it back on after the show - if he loses any more as it is. I was so sad last night. The silver team annoys the HELL out of me. I hope they get an attitude adjustment and just tone it down some. I am anxious to see how Carla (?) does now that she's back on the ranch...is she all talk, or will she really kick butt like she says? Still a good show, but overall I'm very sad that the kids that, IMO, needed it the most were sent home.

Two of past BF's like anal stimulation. I never thought either one was gay.

Yes! That's great! That would give DD something to focus on instead of food, and it would help the two of them bond. I will suggest that pronto to mommie dearest. Thanks!

Thanks, Green! I hadn't thought of the earn vs. bribe. :confused: I feel better. I did call my mother back (guilty conscience and all...) she said she was sorry, and could she bring apple juice or orange juice. I said no. Bottom line, I feed my kid. I think she just wants my daughter to love her - as someone mentioned earlier, she IS from that age where food = love and comfort. So, I understand where she's coming from, it just doesn't make it acceptable. I wonder sometimes what I'll do when DD has kids...I would hope I wouldn't cross her lines and piss her off.

Okay, am I horrible? I just promised my DD a laptop for her birthday in May if she stops eating whatever Grandma tries to give her, eat what I pack her for lunch every day, and Snacks on fruits or veggies after school. She agreed to it...I feel evil, though...I know how badly she wants that laptop.

I'm so excited for you! :w00t: Just a few more days...I can't believe it. It really shows the lack of life I have, that I remember your pre-pregnancy posts.... wow. I also gotta tell ya...I'm getting a little baby fever myself.

Thanks! I fought the urge to call her last night and apologize. She didn't call me, either. What really burned my butt is that I couldn't figure out how DD was gaining. We don't eat a lot on weekends, and she doesn't snack at home during the week. She lost nothing while on WW and I never could understand why.

Where was Dan during the temptation...does anyone know? I feel so bad for him...he really doesn't have the support at home. He needs it there. I agree that the silver team is annoying...I don't like either of them, but I like the one at home a lot better than Joelle. What was up with the black team not voting her off??? I thought no one liked her?

Ha! I like the one, and I'm paraphrasing since I don't remember word for word: Terrorists are smart; and so are we. Terrorists stay up all night wondering how to hurt America; and so do we!

True...I keep thinking, "What could anyone have said to get me moving...?" and the answer is always a shrug and I dunno. I want something to be the magic answer, but you're right...it's nothing external. I don't know this husband and wife's situation, but as for my friend I know I can just start taking a bunch of pictures of her. :scared2: I delete them at her request...but I'm thinking I'll start sending pics her way. "hey, look - it's us at the beach last summer!" THAT'S better than any conk on the head or threat.