DevilMayKare

Thanks for easing my mind Julie. It doesn't surpise me that you're feeling depressed. You seem very goal-oriented. When one is that kind of person, one tends to feel a letdown after meeting a goal. I've often thought the reason I gain weight back after losing (more than 100# three times in my life now) is that all the small goals met along the way are so satisfying. Once ya get there... then what? OBVIOUSLY life is not then wonderful and trouble-free. In fact, a whole new set of problems tends to appear. I'm really glad you've got your Marathon goal. Just make sure you have something important to look forward to after it. I got to my goal weight and ran a 10K on Catalina Island for my 40th bday. It was an absolutely wonderful experience. So wonderful in fact that I felt it couldn't be surpassed and within a week had stopped running and gained 80# back within the next year. Thank you again for all your sharing. Kare

Well I rarely join in on the board these days, but I keep up on several of the threads that speak to me. Like a lot of people I have followed Julie's amazing journey and have really benefitted from her sharing. But... it looks like she hasn't posted for over two weeks now and I'm starting to feel worried. So, Julie... how are you? You out there? Everything Okay? No doubt work and life is really busy but I'm sure I'm not the only one starting to feel concerned. Please check in. And isn't it weird to have people you don't even know worried about you? Kare

Nancy, Do a search on this site for for a thread called Lower Body Lift Surgery Update [Picture] by Muffinbirdie. She had the lift surgery you're thinking about with the same doctor in TJ. She seemed pretty happy with it. Of course it's been a long time since she's been on here. She used to have an inspiring website but that's gone too. Hope she's doing well. Anybody perhaps know what's going on with Muffinbirdie?

Well Jenna.... I think you're living up to your handle. BUt I guess if that ol' pea is keeping you awake no matter how many mattresses are stacked (or how the boobs are stacked) it's gonna have to go! I was a little bothered about my eyebrows not quite matching when I had my eyes done until I noticed they NEVER quite matched. I'd never noticed it before surgery. Since then I've noticed hardly anyone has exactly symetrical eyebrows. I honestly would NOT notice your breasts aren't exactly the same. Any designer can tell you the human eye looks for focal points and tends to fill in the details and ignore the minor imperfections. But of course if you can't sleep...

Ditto. What a shame those who have had bad experiences get jumped on if they try to speak up in some of the threads searching newbies start. I do understand when that happens because I didn't really want to hear negative things when the lapband was my big hope--but now that it's my big $8,000 failure I wish I had seen more warning on this board. In fact, 3 years ago I don't think there even was a subhead for Complications or Life after Removal. What a shame that as time goes on there are likely to be more and more threads on those sections. Thank you for the link. Kare

Could you send it my way also Kit? I'm another looking at a revision. Have to do SOMETHING. I can't believe I'm back up exactly where I was when I got banded 8/05. The hopelessness is suffocating. I haven't seen any Penni updates. Are there some threads I'm missing? Did she disappear along w/ LaMadam & Vines? Kare

Boy there have been a lot of "complications" and "removals" since this thread was originally started. I wish there was some way to edit out all the nastiness, because there is some REALLY GOOD information in here. I recommend newbies take the time to set aside the emotional aspects and read thru this long thread. As for me I was happy as a clam and very successful the first 6-10 months of my band. Now at almost 3 years out I've gained everything back and more and am planning to make an appointment next week to start the DS process.

Well, I haven't been on this board for a couple of months but I logged on after hearing Alec Baldwin's msg to his daughter. I felt so incredibly incensed and figured someone on HERE must be feeling the same way and was talking about it. Not yet, uh? So the heat on LBT is about abortion today... Interesting. Despite Gadget's assertion that not all ANTI-Choice advocates are Christians, all the ones I have met are. I am sure there are exceptions, but I've never met an atheist or agnostic who felt it was their choice to make for someone else on this issue. And the part that always amazes me about CHRISTIANS being so against abortion is the TOTAL LACK of Biblical precedent on this matter. Anyone who has read the Bible--and particurlarily the Old Testament knows that life was very, very cheap. There are so many examples of God's chosen killing those not chosen (How about the entire city castrated and killed? Or God's darling David having Bethsheba's husband killed?) it is just amazing how people use "The Word of God" of all things to justify this stance. "Thou shalt not kill" is one of the commandments, and yet the Bible is full of killing. (And how about EVERY FIRST SON of the entire Egyptian population? How many baby boys did God kill there?) Consider one class of "unwanted children" that didn't come up--that would be those generated by adultery. What a woman is going to do with an unwanted baby is not much of an issue if she is stoned for adultery. Whatever one's opinion is on this one, I really dont' see how you can use the God of the Bible to justify it.

Well, hate to contradict your trainer, but I do not agree with this. Aerobics 3x per week may be a good place to start but I think most people who have lost a lot work out more than that--aerobically. For me to keep losing consistently my workout schedule is usually 1 hour of cardio 6x per week with an additional hour of weight-training 3x per week. After I finally accepted that that is what it takes for me I read Oprah's workout week and that is pretty much her schedule does as well. But... I WISH 3 sessions a week were all it took!

Oh gosh, You guys have got to check out today's: http://postsecret.blogspot.com/ It is SO appropo to this conversation! (Really interesting site, too.) As for me I did not tell my family, except for my two sons... and even them after the fact. I told my two best friends and one of the women I work with and I am REALLY GLAD i didn't tell anyone else! I lost 50# in the first 4 months and then gained it all back just like ANY DIET I'VE EVER BEEN ON. I'm exercising and dieting really strictly now and am starting to lose again, but tool, shmool; the band hasn't made one bit of difference for me--except I'm about $9,000 poorer. At least *everyone* doesn't know and I have to feel like a public failure and fool on top of it. For those of you planning to make it public knowledge, you might just CONSIDER how you're going to feel if it DOESN'T work for you.

Hi Lucygirl, You might want to check out the other fairly long thread "Any Regrets" at the link below. http://www.lapbandtalk.com/any-regrets-t26021.html?t=26021&highlight=Regrets

You should probably move your alarm clock away from the bed. Also since I drink a lot of Water at night when my alarm rings there is nooooo way I could go back to sleep w/o getting up to pee. And once I'm "sitting there"--my workout pants & top hanging right on the shower handle in front of me it's really hard NOT to pull them on and get on the machine instead of crawling back into bed. What I love about my elliptical is that I don't even have to put on shoes to workout. I've been leaving the therm down low and every time I get really cold I jump on for 3-5 minutes to warm up. That's a really easy way to burn cals! (Also since I know I'm just there for a short jaunt I tend to work out at a higher intensity.) The MOST IMPORTANT thing about ANY workout (no matter how you break up the time) is that it's easy enough for you to DO consistently.

There was a really good article on High-intensity interval training & its weightloss benefits in the Health section of the LATimes this week. You might have to register onsite to read this whole article, but I think it's really worth it. http://www.latimes.com/features/health/la-he-interval15jan15,1,5158048.column?coll=la-headlines-health I'm checking out the books referred to in the article, but just for a start the last couple of days I've been adding 30 seconds of going as fast as i can every five minutes of my ellipitical workout and it has definitely made it more interesting. Don't know about the WL results yet, but anything that can make exericise less boring for me has gotta help. Anybody doing this H-I interval training on a regular basis?

Upon telling my mother I'd just gotten engaged she said, "Well, I hope you're going to lose weight--no one wants to watch a bride waddle up the aisle..." :faint:

*Whew* A voice of compassion you are not. Everyone has their own way and works things out in their own time. I'm sure she is pretty sick of the drama herself. When I was going thru my divorce I was very, VERY ANGRY. I just walked about MAD for months... and that isn't really like me. I even got so mad & disgusted at a salesgirl at Sears that I made her cry. I was just a total b*t*h. It was about 5 months into the proceedings when I was out for my evening walk and I was so full of rage I took off and KICKED a brick wall with all my might. Omigosh. My foot hurt so bad!! Right then I imagined how absolutely ridiculous and humilating it would be to break one's toe from kicking a wall in anger. I just thought "WHAT is WRONG WITH ME?!!" And it was that very second that I realized I was not angry-- I was absolutely terrified. I was going to be raising two boys to manhood and trying to provide for them all by myself and it was a pretty daunting prospect. I sat down on the curb and had a good cry. I realized that anger felt a whole lot better to me than the helplessness and fear under it. I guess I must have been ready to face my fear because that's when I was able to let the anger go. Emotions make so much more sense when you're not in the middle of them.

You were AWAKE??? Whoa. Wasn't it hard to hold still? How long did the procedure take? Is it usual to stay awake or was it something you wanted?

Okay now THAT'S an idea whose time has come!

That's a GREAT idea! I'd love it if it were easier to exercise. About the only thing more humiliating that buying clothes when you're fat is going to the gym. Maybe with more parks it would be easier for more of us to walk. I think the automobile is a big contributor to our weight. Think of the calorie burn if we all had to walk to work.

Well you're probably right in that they'd come back thin, but where would they be 5 years AFTER they came back? I don't think it's just that weightloss is hard, it's that the hard part lasts everyday for the rest of your life. I've lost over 50 pounds at least 6 times in my life--and kept it off for as much as 3 years, but sooner or later I can't stand the feeling of deprevation and I stop exercising my guts out... and I gain. Most of the thin people I know do NOT have to be hungry and do NOT workout an hour a day. That's pretty much what I have to do to lose and keep weight off and it's just a real hard wagon to stay on. And BTW, the band has NOT made that easier. I lost 70# the first 10 months of being banded--and almost 2 years later have gained it all back. Intellectually (& wistfully) I'm all for fat acceptance. I think it's a great movement and I wish everyone would join it. I wish I were brave and strong enough to accept myself and stand proudly like Vines does. I admire everyone who can overcome the judgment and hatred of our society; but I'd have to stop judging and hating myself first and I just don't think that's gonna happen.

The city buses are good. If you buy that city bus tour package there are buses going all day long (like every 2 hours or so) to absolutely every tourist destination in Dublin (& there are a LOT) you could possibly want to go to. It's really a great deal and you can choose how many places you want to see in a day... shop nearby and hop back on the next bus. Downtown you just walk around to the different spots. We never took a taxi anywhere, but remember we had a college student showing us around and he had the city buses totally figured out. We used those to get to and from the airport. Probably wouldn't have been so easy without him. The Irish are really friendly and helpful--just too lyrical on directions to understand sometimes. We did rent a car to go outside the city and I would NEVER do that again. Even tho he wasn't insured to drive (only 20 yrs old--& the rental co's are strict on the driving age) I ended up having John drive because he was used to the left side driving and I was going to get us killed. Seriously, the roads are NARROW! If I had it to do over I would either look into a 2-3 day tour for out of the city or hire a driver for a day.

Do NOT rent a car!!! My oldest son spent his college Jr year at University College DUblin and my other son & I went to visit him for a couple weeks. OMIGOSH the roads are soooooo small and the signage is soooo bad and driving on the wrong side is a horror! And getting directions from the Irish is like reading a poem--and about as hard to figure out. There's a lot to see in Dublin--there's some kind of bus tour that you can buy to take about 7 different tours over a 3 day period (or something like that). The jail tour is a tear-jerker and the Guinness plant is downright AMAZING. You get to experience a lot of different bus drivers on that tour and they are a riot. Some sing! Be prepared--Ireland is really expensive. For side trips Galway and Kerry were my favs. Cliffs of Mohar impressive, but not worth the drive on a tight schedule. The book of Kells at Trinity not worth the $ at all, nor was James Joyce's house. I loved all the statues in Dublin. I'm really not all that into tours normally, but the Irish are such wonderful storytellers, the tourguide is really part of the experience. As far as where to stay... we stayed in a different bed & breakfast every night and 90% of them were great. Having at least breakfast paid for (it's included) saved some $, but I did get a little sick of the high-fat fare. The B&Bs in Dublin are much more than the towns. We got all our recommendations out of one of the travel books. I doubt Feb is a busy month--they may be open to coming down on the room price a bit. Have fun! (Hope you aren't a coffee drinker tho... the Irish coffee is terrible.)

Wonderkidsmom... Did you make it thru the holidays? Hope everything turned out all right.

Well, you might not be mentally disturbed, but you've gotta be crazy to answer truthfully to some of those questions!

Wonderkidsmom... Reading thru the above messages (including mine) we sound do sound very "tough love." Please know that it is because we've been thru it and we KNOW how difficult and how FRIGHTENING it is to go thru a divorce in your situation. I think mostly what we mean to convey is you CAN do it--and you WILL be happy someday. Everytime you think about how incredibly frightened and sad you are try to remind yourself that this is just the tunnel you've got to go thru to get to the other side. There IS another side. So much of the pain of divorce is the feeling of failure and the loss of the life you dreamed of. Your choice of name itself shows how invested you are in your picture of yourself as a "Mom" and wife. I remember how sad I felt when my ex took the SUV and I no longer drove the "soccer mom" car. A mom defines so much of who I was it made every loss seem to magnify my feelings of failure as a mother because I was breaking up our home. Maybe with the new year and your new life it's time to come up with a name that conveys the new YOU you want to become--just to inspire and confirm YOURSELF as more than someone's mom. Find ways to inspire yourself. Just a suggestion.

So what if you're the bad guy? YOU are going to need to fight for YOURSELF. Don't ask your kids. Of course they shrugged. 18 or not, they are still kids and now in the middle of this. It does NOT matter whose "fault" it is. Right now you need to make the decisions for yourself and your children and stand by those decisions because every battle you lose now you'll just have to fight again later. If you let him set the precedent of having the kids for (both) holidays, that's how it's going to be next year, and the next. After 17 years I divorced when my kids were 15 & 12. That was 7 years ago. I won't go into all the things my "reasonable" ex-husband pulled the first year, but now that I've been thru it and witnessed it with other people all I can say is NEVER give him the benefit of a doubt in ANYTHING. I'm not saying that because I think your husband a jerk or anything else. I'm saying that because his behavior is TYPICAL. A lot of good men (& women) behave very aggressively when they're feeling threatened... and he is. People are able to justify a lot. And don't forget that he is reading every word you write here as well as everyone's advice. It's a public forum. I'm sure he's printed everything out. Most of all, please do not do, say or write ANYTHING that you might regret later. Hold on. It's likely to be a very tough year, but it WILL get better.