elfnow

I don't have much good advice, because let's be honest - what he said may not have been intentional but it hurt like hell. It is so unfair that we women have our worth tied to our body shape, and just the act of becoming a mother stretches us. It may "ruin" the skin tone but please don't let YOU feel "ruined"!! And maybe this will make you chuckle... Imagine replying, "Hey, your D**K looks like it's gotten longer... Are you losing weight?"

Just because SHE is hung up about surgery doesn't mean anyone else is! HAH. Clearly her "shame" is being projected, and whatever she said is nothing about you and everything about HER. She's making herself miserable in her own life, that's totally her issue!! I'm so glad your friends had your back!

I've only had this question on medical forms - like "any unexplained weight gain/loss?" Just in case I'm depressed or something, I guess... But if an actual person said "did you mean to lose weight" to me, I don't know that I'd be able to hold back on the choice language. I imagine the mildest thing I'd manage would be something awfully sarcastic.... "no, actually - funny story - I was walking along in Short Pump and tripped and fell on a surgeon... Next thing I know, I have 1/4 of my stomach left and I weigh 75 pounds less!!! And $15,000 is missing!! Do you think I should sue?" But what would probably come out of my mouth would be more along the lines of "JESUS ******* CHRIST WHAT THE ******* DO YOU THINK?!" I'm just a b*tch like that tho. Especially if I get stressed. Such low patience for inane questions....

Aha! I know the answer! "I had to have surgery for a really bad ulcer". Ulcer surgery is basically a sleeve, but of course it's to remove damaged/diseased tissue, not directly for weight loss. Thus they might take only a little bit or maybe a bunch of the stomach. but you can always say, "they had to cut part out and sew it back up and now my stomach is a little smaller" All the exactly-what-happened, with none of the stigma!

Twice now, in totally unrelated circles, I have heard WLS referred to as a "tummy tuck". To me, that term refers to plastic surgery and/or liposuction... Not WLS... In one situation, I said I'd had "gastric surgery" (the details left for further conversation if the other person cares what exact surgery)..... And "oh did you get that tummy tuck procedure?" I was like O_o "no, I mean I had surgery on my actual stomach, not my skin." "Yeah, where they take out part?" "Yes, a gastrectomy, that's what I had..." Another circumstance was a waitress who asked me if my food wasn't good (I didn't eat much), and I started to say "it was fine" and my partner cut in with "she had a sleeve surgery, so she doesn't eat very much! She's lost a lot of weight!" (Um... Thx? He's just proud...) the waitress first said "wow is that even safe to do? My sister had a tummy tuck but nothing like that..." Well when I asked, the waitress described the "tummy tuck" and perfectly described a laparoscopic gastric surgery (I couldn't tell what kind exactly, but not a lap-band) Is this a term for plication, where they "tuck" the stomach into itself? This translation is bugging me! LOL

I am holding my breath a little as I report 298!!! I had a stomach bug tho, and I'm still not eating very much.... so that probably "helped". Hopefully I don't rebound up but just stay steady... Even MORE hope that it still looks low when I put clothes on!

I am open with it; this was a response to several other posts about whether or not to share. A good friend of mine is having ulcer surgery soon that will remove half her stomach tissue. Her surgeon has told her to start attending Bariatric surgery classes to learn about the after-care.

This isn't just WLS... I have a friend whose dad basically raised him with "if you don't struggle doing it the hard way then you've cheated yourself and you aren't appreciative" ... This has nothing to do with weight loss, but so many other facets of his life. Why spend your hard-earned $8,000 on a reasonably decent used car, when you could buy two decrepit identical cars for $2500 and then spend another $8000 in five-hundred-dollar increments, and three years of unending frustration "fixing" one? Why buy a new stove for $400 when you can get an old cheapo one on Craigslist for $50 that only has two working burners? If you can't fix it you just aren't trying hard enough! It's EASY!! "Any fool can do it" he's fond of saying. Now if the guy practiced what he preached, maybe it'd be something ... But he doesn't. The dad has got 5 - yes FIVE - old motorcycles just rusting away waiting for "a good day to build ____". House falling down around him bc he won't redo the roof himself and won't hire a contractor because "any fool can do it"! And if a project never gets done, well, it's never his fault.... Always someone else's fault. This has driven my friend some kind of crazy over the years. Now he's 36 and trying to not pass this crap on to his daughter. I'm forwarding your link to my friend... Because he needs to get his head OUT of his dad's insanity.... And "purposely taking the hard way" is totally his dad's MO.

Congrats to all of you!!!

It is so normal!! Best of wishes to you both!!

Have you done a sleep study? Do you snore really loud (also a sleep apnea problem)?? Seriously there must be SOMEthing. The alternative is to ask them to keep everything on file and be ready to submit when you inevitably come back....

Heaven for if you have kids, LOL!! I'm lucky to have a partner and NO close family. My mother would have been all up in my space!!

You will get through this!! I bet the surgery's gonna be easy after you've worried so much about just telling your husband... I personally find physical stuff is MUCH easier than emotional stuff!! You can do this.

I'd start some of the pre-op diet today and Friday... Ease in a little... Day 4 is the hardest, then it gets less hard!! You kinda get in the flow CONGRATS!!!!!!

The other day I was both PMS-y and fasting before a metabolic test at my gym... So when I was done I was all RAWWRRRR I AM GOING TO HAVE A FREAKING smoothie AND SOMEONE TRY AND STOP ME!! Well I got it with whole milk, chocolate whey, 2 scoops of Peanut Butter, and ice. Got about... Idk, Pretty close to half but not quite ... And was like, :-P ok I'm done with this. I threw the rest out and wasn't hungry 'til dinner. Go figure.

NO. The pre-surgery diet is NOT a sustainable diet, and it is designed to shrink your liver temporarily to reduce the risk of secondary injury. Your approval is based on your BMI at the time of the info being sent in, along with the doctor indicating that you have TRIED to lose weight in a normal healthy diet and cannot, and have a co-morbidity. It isn't like a mortgage with pre-approval and a final credit check right at the moment you're in the office ready to sign!!!

I am also going to be blunt: y'all's marriage communication is f'd up. To me this is like not telling your husband you're pregnant.... And then he just comes home from work one day and there's a new addition on the house that you had built and you're just hanging out with a baby he didn't know about. I am also going to advocate counseling - he's perhaps treating you like a child by being condescending and not recognizing your real concerns.... But you're inviting it by hiding and sneaking around like an irresponsible teenager! The fact that you're doing all this with "your money" doesn't make it okay, just like if he walked into a new addition on the house and you had a new baby it wouldn't be magically OK just because the baby is genetically his and you paid for the new construction yourself... I do want to be clear: I am not at all saying that you are wrong here, not am I saying you're right. I am just saying that "marriage" and "communication" does NOT WORK LIKE THIS. There are clearly some real issues between you guys if it's come to this, and you both need to recognize that. That kind behavior with that amount of money with no notice or warning is symptomatic of a bipolar / manic episode. Please talk to someone professional!!

I have a few family members and good friends who might also benefit from the surgery.... so I haven't been too quiet about it. There are a few people who didn't know at first and a few people I didn't really want to tell, but ended up telling them anyway. I joined a weightloss group at my gym - it's a special 6-month program of 3x per week group training, healthy recipes, nutrition discussions, etc. It coincided beautifully with my surgery (it started 1 week before my surgery)... I had to tell them why I was taking Week 2 off and why my doc signed my health paper with some restricted activity for a month... And honestly with the way my weight has come off they'd have worried something was really WRONG or like eating-disorder issue. My pre-surgery diet started 1/27, the exercising started 2/3, and my surgery was 2/10. I am still a big heavy easily-winded person (less and less but still) and sometimes I have to rest where the rest if the class is pushing through... And yet I have personally lost as much weight as four classmates combined....55 lbs in 2 months! Almost a pound a day. Honestly tho when I told the lead trainer she was nothing but supportive and happy. She is SO personable and so motivating, just in how she says things! Her whole family has had Bariatric surgeries of one kind or another, with mixed/limited success. She herself used to be "overweight" but decided she was into body sculpting and completely toned up, and now she's the lead trainer! Granted my gym won't be taking promotional pictures of me for future "weight-loss warriors" programs because I had surgery TOO (therefore I'm not exactly a normal weight-loss client)... But I was relieved that NOBODY has suggested I'm "cheating". In fact, having seen her whole family struggle with food and nutrition and failed lap-bands and such, the lead trainer says that she KNOWS it isn't the "easy way out".

Isopure drinks have made a big difference in my life. All the protein and the hydration, jolly-rancher flavored. None of the BS of counting things.

That was me while pregnant.... Paaaiiiiinnnnn in the butt!!!! Good news is you can set alarms for yourself!

I used to be able to track every molecule that crossed my lips. Ok maybe not "every" but I know you get my drift. I'd take out my little Moleskine notebook and look through it and make notes and stroke my own ego and basically just love on it. I could do it SO easily, didn't eat anything til I'd written down the calories, gFat, gCarb, gFiber in parenthesis, gProtein, and had run the updated tally for the day so far. If I came in under my goals I had different color stickers I would award myself, and of course my goal was to get one of each color every day.... (Extra blue stickers for Water I drank too!!) And then I got a different job where I didn't have so much spare brain-power. I did PRETTY well but I'd sometimes have a sticky note and tally at the end of the day. Then I went back to school. And had NO spare brain cells. And ENJOYED THAT MORE. And then.... The real blow.... I got pregnant. My baby, already a budding zombie, ATE MY BRAIN. And then I gave birth, and nursed her, and began parenting by the school of "don't sweat the small stuff". Calories? Who the f* knows. Grams of things? Crap. Things have grams? Huh. What's a calorie again? I cannot possibly think about these things because my boobs are leaking calories DIRECTLY OUT OF MY BODY. Hand over the f*cking cherry pie and nobody gets hurt. Well for pregnancy and now 18 months of breastfeeding, I couldn't take Adderall. And I lost every desire to micromanage my nutrition. It's one reason I wanted surgery - there is a level of thought I don't have to put into it. Asking my doc tomorrow to start back on adderall (very low dose).... But I can barely keep an eye on Protein and water.... I just try to keep my carbs equal to my protein and let fat take care of itself.

If you've met the requirements it's gonna go through!! I'm full of positive thoughts for both of you!!

Ok, I'm gonna post an honest and, IMHO, awesome pic of me. I took pics 1/28, a day into my pre-surg diet.... Surgery was 2/10. I've taken several pics in the meantime... And I took some yesterday. Anyway, I'm sharing because I have lost 1/3 of my excess weight. I am still really big... But I've changed a lot.

I found that taking my Vitamins spaced out made me just as nauseous every time as just swallowing them all at once... So yeah, I swallow them all at once. I've taken pills my whole life, I am one of those people who can swallow just about anything without choking. I'll leave the implications to the readers... LOL

Sophie'sChoice: also don't underestimate the amount of calories you'll burn by "inefficient walking". It is crazy how efficient our bodies are and having to use all those extra muscles to get around just for simple tasks, it burns LOTS of extra calories. You can do this!!!