giveyouthemoon

Mine was named soon after my surgery. It started with Jack calling his a "little silicon fist" so I liked that image. I imagine my band as a tiny Russian ballerina who has her little fist around my stomach. Somedays she is happy. Somedays she is petulant. So I call her Katrinka. Sometimes Trink for short. I often say "oh, Katrinka is hungry" or "Katrinka is NOT happy". Katrinka now governs my eating life and I happily let her.

Yup, I did it too when still in the liquid phase and still do this occasionally. It's quite a thing to learn what my band will and won't tolerate. For me potatos are just such a no go. They cause me pain in all forms of the potato....believe me, I've tried.

I'm a huge baseball fan and they always show the players stats on the Jumbotron. I weigh more than all the ball players. For a while there I weighed the same as one guy who is 6'7" and they joke about how chubby he is (he weighs 275). I'm 5'7" and weighed what a "chubby" 6'7" man weighs. I know from depressed about this!!! I'm hoping that by Spring Training I weigh less than at least SOME of the players!!!! But for the grace of god and my band..............

I'm a 49'rs fan. Man is it tough to be a niner fan these days. Ouch. I've been a niners fan for about sixteen years. They took another bad loss right in the shorts today. *sigh*

Oh Megan, I've so been there, done that. Oh and it's SO frustrating. To have, for a moment, the attention of an interesting man. To be clicking on all cylinders. And to still go home alone. *sigh* I'm right on the same page with you. Happened to me Wednesday of this week and I'm still thinking about him. Good thing he lives very far away (he was here for business). *sigh*

Well now, this silicon fist (as Jack calls it) is quite an interesting device. I'm now three months into this band. Lost over 40 lbs, feeling a lot better. That part is all good. But now my band isn't so new anymore. I'm starting to settle into my old routine and I'm finding something interesting about this process. Since I'm not so "aware" of things now since the band is a part of my everyday life, I find that like a kid, I'm pushing the boundaries and the band keeps biting back. I must be dumb because it seems to take repeated PB's and I still haven't learned my lesson. (my doc calls the band "surgical behavior modification") I find myself wanting to eat too much, eat too fast, take huge bites. I *know* how I should eat but I run off and eat a big piece of meat too fast anyway. I'm finding that my inner fat girl is MAD that food is no longer an easily accessible "drug" to calm my nerves. I find myself frantic that I can't just hork down a whole box of donuts and then feel bad and beat up on myself as a means of dealing with life like I had for years. It's like a part of me is going nuts over losing this control, no matter how evil and hurtful I was being to myself. It's almost like an abusive person in my life just realized I'm not going to take their crap anymore and is going crazy trying to keep their hold over me. How powerful is THAT thought? I'm "storming" right now over the dramatic change in the way I can eat. I *know* these changes are for my best good....but man....old habits are REALLY hard to break. I was feeling so good because I hadn't PB'd in a while and had never PB'd in a public place. Well, Wednesday and Friday of this week I had two MAJOR PB's, one in a restaurant, one in a ball park. Bad. It's tough to explain to someone who doesn't know you have a band why your eyes are watering and you need to race to the bathroom. (by the way, I just told her that I was having "really bad acid reflux" and she bought it). And at times I KNOW I am eating way too much but I keep eating and then everything hurts in my tummy. I know that all of this is scary for the band, I sure don't want slippage, and this separating myself from my "abusive" side is very necessary. It's just become a REALLY difficult process. I just didn't realize how crazy this could be or how deep the roots of my own self abuse could run. So.....anyone else go through a "storming" phase with the band? Where you were trying to "act out"? Any survival tips????

I LOVE this image. LOVE IT. Mine is more like an overbearing parent. I want to eat right but it's like "NO! You do not disobey me! I command you to eat as much as you can as fast as you can!" so I end up WANTING to eat. And then I do, knowing it's not going to be okay, then I get TERRIBLE stuck and I'm in the bathroom bending over the toilet waiting for what is stuck to go reverse on me. So I mentally punish myself for eating then my body physically punishes me for eating and suddenly it feels like an AWFUL lot of punishment for poor little Karen who is just trying to make it through this crazy mixed up life. So you would think the after such a punishing experience that I'd make better choices next time? No. Cycle of punishment continues. At what point do I finally stop punishing myself for doing my best job trying to get healthy? This cycle is usually why all diets have failed me in the past. I'd lose some then this weird cycle of almost panic needing to eat EVERYTHING would emerge and I'd give up and gain back all the weight. This wrasslin' with my demons, my inner abuser, is a really key problem to work out. And what's great is the band is there, like I said, to referee. Because I phyically CAN'T go off on a huge binge like I've always done in the past. It's impossible. That means the band is working. And someday....soon I hope, this "surgical behavior modification" will find a home in my brain and all the sides of me that are waging battle inside will lay down their arms. Maybe the dragon will settle down. Maybe. But for the grace of God and my therapist. I've an uphill climb to continue.........

First, good on YOU for staying strong!! That is what will make you a good bandster down the road. Second, no food is EVER off limits to you. Getting that fatalistic thinking about "waaah, I can NEVER have it again" will get you nuts. You only didn't have it today. But that spaghetti is still in the world and can still be consumed at another, better, time. That kind of thinking always helps me. "Okay, I choose not to have that today but there may be another time where I will have it. It's not gone, it was just my choice". Good luck with the fight. I'm waging a war with myself these days as well. Courage!!!

Well, heck, instead of pants can you wear nice skirts with tights? That's my fave winter outfit and tights help keep the legs warm if you live somewhere pretty cold. But congrats on putting the jeans on and they fit!! It's a good feeling, isn't it??

Happy Happy Birthday!!! Make it a good one!!!!!

My doc is also a "no carbonation ever again" kind of guy. I'd say don't attempt it. A soda is all chemicals and junk anyway. So not worth it.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! My band is named Katrinka. Katrinka meet Hope, Hope meet Katrinka!! I have a feeling our bands will be very good friends! LOL!!!!! Seriously tho, great job and welcome to the show!!!

I would suggest it has something to do with how your body retains Water during that time. That's my doc's explanation anyway. The tissues in the core of your body are holding water and that makes the band tighter. However.....this doesn't explain why I (and many others) feel WIDE OPEN around "that time". I retain a TON of water. However, it may just be about where your body chooses to hold the fluids. For me I can eat anything for almost two weeks out of the month, then once my "visitor" leaves, like overnight, boop, I get my restriction back.

Nope, no catheter. My doc said that since it is such a short surgery that it wasn't necessary. However, as I was on my "final approach" and walking into surgery, they made me stop and use the restroom just minutes before entering the surgery room. Just as a precaution. I'm SO VERY glad I didn't have a catheter.

Well of course, I'm happy to share. This is just my few days of "research". I wore it again last night and had a creepy dude at a baseball game who wouldn't leave me alone. Just kept trying to talk to me. Made me think that there *can* be a slight drawback to wearing this stuff. It doesn't differentiate nice guys and creepy guys. But it's okay, I've been around the block maybe once or twice and knew how to shut that strange dude down. It's all good. And to me it was just further proof the stuff works. My scientific research continues. Yeah, you put it perfectly how I view this stuff. I can be quite a charmer and do okay once someone gets to "know my insides" like you said. But that first approach is where I could use a little help.

Well this is an issue near and dear to my heart. I was in a seven year relationship that ended a year and a half ago. There has been NO action in that time. But lately, my hormones are running rampant. I guess I've hit that "age" that women do and I'm like a fourteen year old boy. A man walks by me and I'm thinking all kinds of naughty things. I'm NUTS and I've no where to take that out (with another person present I mean). I'm ready to have a man in my life again but there's nobody that's a candidate in my life. As for the pheremones....well, I bought some from you Lisa, and I have given them a try twice. I think they sort of heighten the senses, they don't compel some guy to run to you and sleep with you. I found they worked fairly well one day and the next day with the same group of guys the results were mixed. And the "fairly well" that one day meant only that my guy friends were a bit more attentive and a lot more "hands on" with me. I got lots of arms around me and hands on my knee in a non-creepy way. And I loved every second of it. But nothing happened with any of those guys beyond that. Then again, these were guys I already know and I already know they like me. I think more than anything, the pheremones make ME feel good. It makes me feel all happy to put that on and wonder what results I'll get. Honestly, I think the reaction I got from my guy friends was really more about me "feeling my oats" because I knew I had it on and so I was a bit more willing to be more flirty. I found it didn't have much of any effect on just your random guy in the street. In fact I tried to flirt like crazy with a guy at a hotel counter (I was at the hotel bar) thinking that he'd be into my pheremones....he seemed happy to talk to me then walked away. :shrug: Oh well, anything I can do to better my odds is worthwhile to me!! Oh and pheremones might get them to prick up their ears right at first....but I don't think they'll sustain any great romance. Ya gotta do that on your own.

I am *so* incredibly happy you heeded my adivice in the underwear thread. Lovefifi is the GREATEST shopping spot!!!!! I feel like I've been able to give BACK to you and that makes me happy. We're karmically even!!!!

Um. That would be me. ENJOY. I love that place. They are SUPER easy about returns too!!!!! Glad I could give BACK to you after the happy times and box of fun you brought to me!!!!!

They say it's your birthday, nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh!!!! Have a great day!!!

Happy Birthday girl!!!! Hope you have a WONDERFUL day!!!

I believe one nurse said..."liquid in...liquid out"....it's TOTALLY normal. Sorry!! I had it too AND for several weeks after surgery.

I am incredibly saddened for your loss. This must be a very confusing time for you. Condolences to you and to her family.

I sold some stock that my company had given me five years ago. But if I hadn't had that, I would either have financed via the Inamed financing plan or taking a line of credit out at the bank. Ya gotta get creative.

Since the band can affect your breathing it's not really out of the realm of reasonable. The whole pre-op test work is a pain, but heck, just stay head down, get through it. Just think of it this way. You are one step closer to your band!!

Oh honey! I'm so very sorry! The band can feel tight when you are stressed and baby, YOU ARE STRESSED. I don't know what to say other than I'm so incredibly sorry. I've been through something similar and I'm here for you. Just *hugs* and here's a tissue and hold my hand. We'll get through this together!!!