katesuccess

When shopping for a swim suit no longer makes you feel suicidal or ashamed---or like eating your weight in Peanut Butter cups. (Okay, I still hate seeing how my thighs pouf on the outside and sag with wrinkles on the inside, but it's just that one part!)

Just finished my leftover scallops with wasabi sauce from dinner last night - and I regularly eat wasabi seaweek, salsa and the Indian foods--just remember the water with meals prohibition means it's good to taste a tiny bite first so you don't feel like extinguishing the fire with a big gulp! I did wait a month or so post op though--in case it affected healing, though that was never medical advice or anything. Honestly spicy foods help me feel satisfied more easily, and so I consider them a bonus!

Got to say - that post-Easter candy is calling my name constantly! Thanks for this post, it's most timely. My biggest frustration is that even if I work a couple small pieces into my plan, those two small pieces call for more the second they're down the hatch. I just keep wanting more, and I hate that. Not starting is my best bet, and not buying it has gotten easier this week. Thanks for putting into words what I'm going through, and likely lots of others.

Sorry you're having to tough it out with this slow down @davesblond - I know first hand how hard that is! A lot of us stalled at around 6 months, myself included. Then started losing again. For me it helped to do a fluctuation of calories (I went up a bit and then back down) and to really change up my exercise routine. Others have posted on here that it was something they had to 'wait out' for the most part. That' might have had the same effect as my changing things up - I'll never know, but take heart, it'll start again if you're eating carefully and exercising. I find tracking really helps too. GOod luck and hang in there! Kate

My variation on the husband comment from someone was: "You're doing so great and look so healthy--now 'Richard' needs to start working on it!" My response was "Well, I love him dearly as he is, and we all do it in our own time" --the guy was well meaning, so no snarkiness from me--but really?! Mostly people here at work have said nice things to me, the most common one being "You're just wasting away!" Wasting?? Sigh.

Got to say @hadouni, you hit the nail on the head when you said, "Now that he knows why..." ! I've found a lot of otherwise decent or kindly-inclined guys (and women) will say something that sounds really bad simply for being new to the topic or uninformed. When my hubby (31 years) and I are talking about something that really matters to me I find I sometimes sort of pre-telegraph some info to him. Not to tell him how to react really, but to let him know I expect more support than idle conversational critique. Recently I was debriefing a huge work day of mine with him (he had also been there) and just said how I was pleased it went well and that I was working to keep myself being overly self-critical about it or picking it apart in minutia as I sometimes did. His response was great, saying supportive things and keeping clear that this was MY thing to reflect on, not his to dump on. (He did that last time - weighing in before he could figure out how much it would hurt me!) When I told him my decision to investigate WLS it was much the same - letting him know it was only a conversation we were having if IF he was informed and interested in learning, NOT if he was just going to do a knee-jerk fear response from whatever he'd heard on tv or what his own feelings about having it might be. The only time our conversation went off the rails the whole time - through all the pre-op stuff and now a year of post-op - was when he wasn't responding out of being informed, rather just ignoring all info and research and jumping to conclusions. Anyway - long way around to say it might be good to couch the conversation in the tenor you'd like it to take-- like; "A couple years ago I had WLS and it was the best decision i ever made! I feel great and am pretty darned happy with how I look - in spite of a few scars!" A guy who argues that one isn't a likely keeper for me anyway. Good luck - and YES, there's some great fellows out there who ARE kind and sensitive and love the person, not just the body.

I'm now one year post-op and have lost about 115 lbs - with 25 yet to go. I've been working out at the gym and walking (now running) since the surgery, and I feel so good I almost wouldn't care how I look. I do dislike my flat saggy flat boobs, and my wrinkly saggy stomach and thighs, but mostly that's cover-able. My husband thinks I look so great he doesn't care at all about the loose skin, etc. He's definitely a breast man too, and even the deflating of those hasn't bothered him as much as it does me. With summer swimming and beaches coming I mostly wish I could hide the wrinkly saggy-ness of my thighs - but my arms aren't really that terrible. When I'm tempted to look at them critically and see all that crepey skin, I immediately notice how toned the muscles have gotten, and that totally distracts me from any negativity!

Here's my top two faves lately

I can really relate @MOSunshine ! I"m in the same boat, but my loss has now slowed enough that my clothes are 'lasting longer' size wise. And while it sounds to all the rest of the world like a great problem to have, or they roll their eyes and completely disregard the frustration we have over this - it's still a real issue to deal with, so good for you speaking up and putting it into words. I"m down about 115 now, and work in a religious setting so the next four days are the height of the whole year, with different services on every day (plus one tonight!). Looking in my closet this evening about what to wear each of the next four days was really frustrating and irritating. I tried things on and these things I used to LOVE (Eileen Fisher taupe silk artistically-cut kimono!) now hangs sack-like on me and drops at the shoulders. My go-to really nice thing is now heading for the Consignment-store-closet in the guest room until I can get over there again. Argh!! I'll be fine, and wear something presentable, but i liked knowing I had collected a few really good pieces. Now like you I hesitate to invest in them until I know how much smaller i'll get, and I'm not finding things quite as nice as that (on the conservative side) even at the higher end consignment stores. So - thanks for letting me crash the whining party and join in! We're allowed, even if it IS a good thing that's causing the rant.

You are so right on that one! I'd also say not to buy too much ahead for another reason - for me I use the fun of shopping for something that fits me in-the-moment as a reward for losing another chunk of weight. A non-food reward! I look for those where I can, and like the feeling of celebrating my hard work - even if i don't buy anything, just going and trying on things that now fit feels rewarding. I seriously never thought this much or spent this much time on clothes in all my life! Feels so silly to do so now, but also so good.

SO not a candidate for Survivor or Great Race one any more given the eating parts--but the really good news is that I'm also no longer a candidate for Biggest Loser or in danger of qualifying for My 600 Lb Life! Yay!! Now that show where you get $5000 to shop for new clothes in NYC has possibilities, right?

When you don't bother putting away the sewing machine any more, because you are constantly altering clothes and taking them in, until they no longer look presentable. When you no longer look for the equipment in the gym facing away from the mirrors, but actually enjoy seeing yourself as your muscles become more defined and lifting starts looking good! When not only your bottom fits in your swivel desk chair, but your arms and elbows too! (Inside the arm rests that is).

I found Goodwill great for casual things, and such good deals. Then I looked hard to find a good consignment shop that carries BOTH plus size (so i can turn the things in that are too big in those sizes) and ladies sizes for my current weight. I looked especially for one that advertised labels and professional clothes, so I get to shop 'the good stuff' with my consignment money there, and jeans, tshirts etc at the Goodwill places.

Well, 169 today. Nowhere close to my Easter goal weight, but I finally broke through 170, thank goodness.

Think detox, like @@Rogofulm said! If I start with a tiny piece of chocolate or bread, I swear I want another before the first one is even finished. Darn I hate that! I also find that since i crave chocolate more than most, using a half a quest bar (very low carb) in one of my favorite choc flavors really helps. Full flavor without being overly sweet to my tasting.

Yeah - i'm finding people don't recognize me too. Or they have the bizarre reaction like I got last month - a woman screams across the parking lot (in front of colleagues) "Oh my gosh - look at you! How much weight have you lost?" "A lot," I replied. She asked yet AGAIN! OMG - so insensitive. I just repeated "A lot." and smiled. Sigh. My reaction was to feel kind of hurt when people didn't remember me - sometimes it's literally a recognition thing, other times they really don't remember the fat woman since she must have been insignificant, right? Not! Those are the ones that annoy me. If they remember me but just don't recognize me it's easier. I've been down just over 100 pounds for a few months now (weight loss is MUCH slower now) so i don't so much see the 287 pound person in the mirror any more, but I do forget how that visual affects other people, and how much my internal changes have been on my end. Own it, and enjoy it!

My mother and her partner are in their 80s and when I eat with them are always pushing me to have some wine or some of their dessert, more dinner, etc. It helps to remember that they have serious memory issues, but I really do get tired of saying "no thanks" or "I just don't want any more - but thank you anyway" and so on. Sigh. Gets old, but then i'm lucky they are getting old too, since it means i get to keep enjoying them! ALl the folks i work with have seen my weight loss and so are so great about not pushing food on me, and last week at our snack/coffee time the host brought v-8 juice for me since i said I'm off fruit for a while (need to drop my carb count). SO thoughtful--it meant the world to me that she remembered I liked it, and couldn't drink the juices and such that are normally offered. Now if only I didn't have to pass that basket of chocolates on the admin's desk every day, ten times a day! I've decided that every time I pass on eating them it strengthens those mental messages to not do it--so this week it's worked out fine. As long as there's no Peanut Butter cups! (I drew the line there and told her she could bring in anything but those - lol.)

So hope you're feeling better now and no longer sick. I plateaued the past couple months which also led to nibbles here and there of things i shouldn't eat, and like everyone else here knew i had to go back to tracking everything! Also I spoke to a nutritionist who works with body-builders about it, because i couldn't believe with 6x/week exercise and only 7-800 cal a day (~75 g protein) I wasn't losing weight. He said to count the carbs, and keep them under 30 at this calorie level. I know it's just me and only his advice, but as soon as i backed off the fruit and extra bits like sauces and such with more carbs, I started losing again, now 3 pounds in the past two weeks. (Yay!) I'm 27 lbs to goal, so in much the same boat - and before now I hadn't lost three pounds in two months~! SO not happy about that! Anyway, just a thought. I know lean cuisines taste good and are easy, but consider looking for some alternatives that don't have the carbs that all those frozen entree's seem to have. Good luck - hope you're on the downward scale slide soon!

SOunds like using a bit too much - I like a few of them myself, but only in very small amounts. Try also the small bottles called SweetDrops! They're naturally flavored and come with an eyedropper dispenser lid. My daughter and I love them, and she refuses to use artificial tasting stuff. I find them in health food stores, whole foods and the like.

Similar story here! I'm not at goal yet (28 lbs to go) but have lost over 100 lbs, and am now 10 1/2 months out from surgery. Yup, habits and cravings come right back. And I'm in total agreement about returning to those practices, AND that sugar (specifically good chocolate in my case) is like crack for me. I know if i start it's SO much harder to stop. Hence that 2 days you've had and your healthy fear of it turning into two weeks, two pounds, etc. I keep the chocolate Quest bars cut in half in my purse and in my workout bag and car, so if i'm tempted to buy and eat something like that, I'll at least eat a better-for-me version. And yes - jerky in my car too! DId you keep a journal in those early stages? Go back and read it and see what you were learning and how you were coping. If not, look back over your old posts on this site and see what was in your head then. We tend to think we remember, but i'm surprised quite often by some good tip or gem I've forgotten. Good luck! Sounds like a lot of us are right there with you! Kate

I agree - great post! How wonderful you have a friend like that too. I'm finding people I was close to before weight loss are a bit more distant or maybe just find less time to be with me and hang out now, and I can't help but think it's got a lot to do with my now being smaller than they are, or at least no longer morbidly obese (I hate that term!). I'm still 28 pounds away from goal, but feel great and am no longer hating how I look. I just really miss the closeness of those friendships, when we could talk about our bodies so honestly and easily. Now if I try that at all I'm "too fixated on weight" or "have nothing to worry about" or seem to have been booted out of the intimate-friend club because of no longer being so heavy. Hmmm. As I look over this post it sounds like I need some new friends.

Hi folks. I'm just checking in too - we're coming up on a year soon and I was wondering how people are doing sticking with eating on-plan and losing, now that we've got that first period behind us when weight loss seems a bit faster. I'm struggling with 'treating myself' and eating a few things I shouldn't some days, and i assume that's why my loss is stalled. I've bounced between 171 and 173 for about a month now and it's driving me nuts. I"m not talking way off plan here, I'm talking letting my calories go up from 800 to 1000 a few days a week! I still get 70 to 75 grams of Protein a day and lots of exercise. I'm really hoping to start losing again--if I can just stay away from those darned Justin's Dark chocolate Peanut Butter Cups! Sigh. My commitment today is to eat only my planned food, and no junk! And--I plan to renew that each day and get through the week. Anyone else stalled? It really DOES seem like one ought to be able to lose at this calorie level, given 6 days a week of exercise. What are all of you finding? My surgery was April 29, 2014, my starting weight was 287, currently 173, goal (as per my doctor) is 145 and I'm 5'4".

Back down to 173, but that goal of 155 is looking unlikely.

I not use very little of them - mostly in the sugar free tora I flavors in my protein drinks or coffe. Mostly I use Stevia, which is a natural sweetener. Once me tora is are gone I'm switching to the SweetDrops, which are naturally sweet and you use much less--by drops from eye dropper in the lid. Whole Foods or similar places carry them--some nutrition/health stores do too.

I think I was too bummed about my weight to post it earlier - I was leading a conference all weekend and overindulged! So as of Tuesday when I returned my weight was 177 Good thing is I'm back down - but I had to post my honest number for this week. Next week will be better!