j_war06

I havent seen this girl since a week and a half before they went out to a club and abandoned me on my grandmother's wedding day. She figured out we were actually getting serious, and she swooped in on the opportunity. No she doesn't wanna date him, and no he doesnt wanna date her. Its the fact he told me I was NOT invited and that I was tripping, when he was abandoning me. Ever since prom night he started pulling away from me, like he does sometimes. Its like he doesnt want me to have fun with him. I dunno, all I actually know is that my only other friends are getting married in March and having a baby in October, and all they do is sit around and go rent movies, and frankly I am not pregnant and I didnt get anyone else pregnant, I have no obligations (except to love her and the baby unconditionally) but I am not a parent and I am sick and tired of sitting around with them like an old married couple! I love it sometimes, but most of the time I wanna get out and party!! I wanna be around ppl, drink, and try to dance (cant much because of my knees). I am sick and tired of sitting around this house, or my best friend's house. I wanna go out, but I never get invited. I asked him to have something at his house instead of hers and invite her if he wanted. He said I'm not going to do that because stuff will start. I told him I will not do a thing or say a thing to her, I will leave her alone. He said yeah, but she will. I told him its a shame he would even want to be around that sort of immaturity, that she would start something over nothing. I never said anything that was not true about her and I didnt even say the whole truth, I didnt say anything that everybody didnt know already. All I said is she looks like Josie Grossy from never been kissed and that she was a lying, kniving, inconsiderate whore and that she is jealous and not very self-confident if she has to take what other girls have.

LoL I'll share my pics

OMG! I live on Starbucks! I love it so much, I am so glad that I can still have it after the surgery. OH! BTW, a Caramel Frappacino Light is awesome too!!

Wow, thats brutal, when I get mine done my Dr. is going to use the invisistitches (someone else can tell you what they are called, they are very popular). No wonder you are still hurting.

Hey I think I am going to go to designashirt.com and have the "I'll remember what you said when I was fat" put on it, hmmm I dunno tho the "you have such a great ass, you'd be so pretty if you had a new face" I dunno, but I definately want to have a T-Shirt printed up for the occassion

OH I have another one, I also have thought about rock climbing (and want to do it). I want to walk and not hurt, I want to be able to write on paper without my hands hurting (I have to type everything that is lengthy) and well, quite frankly, I would love to start a community awareness program about obesity and its side effects focusing mainly on obesity in children. I want to be an advocate for the American Obesity Association, and I want to help rid America of the Obesity Epidemic.

Well, I have two fantasies, first I would LOVE to walk into Abercrombie and Fitch and buy whatever I wanted and it ALL FIT!!!! My second one is that I love to do a classic Marilyn Monroe Playboy photo shoot. I know what u are probably thinking, but honestly its not to show off my body to everyone, its to say look where I came from, look at how beautiful my body was then and now. I am a big believer in nudity as art (no I am not part of a nudist colony lol). I just think it would be fun to do a classic Marilyn shoot.

bubblesstina, I live in the infamous Jasper,Texas. LOL

It is so funny, because I am giving all of you advice on being strong and stuff, but I never can be strong for myself. Sure, I may look strong on the outside, but inside I am hurting SOOOOOO bad that no amount of surgery can hurt that bad. BTW, I don't really have friends (not because I am fat) because I never go to school because of my comorbidities I can not go up and down the stairs and the school won't give me a key to the elevator, and I HURT SO BAD. I am going back in August though for my final round then I am free of this prejudice, hateful, rude little town in the sticks of Texas lol!!!! I HATE THIS PLACE!!!! Also, my ex and I are still good friends and will always be, it's just ugly little whores that drive us to fighting sometimes. I hope that one day he will realize how much I love him (btw u can love someone and want to kill them too lol). On normal grounds I would be mad at him, and was, but now I am over it and we are cool now, but the "friend" in question is being sooooooooooooo immature as usual, but I wanna go party with my friends, but she is always there. I am not going to start anything because: a) I am too lazy, I am too fat, and C) I am not a fighter anyways. But he seems to think she would start stuff, but it takes 2, and I am not going to be part of that two, alls well I guess I will just have to wait until college to actually experience a party. It really is a shame tho that I was not invited to parties my freshman year because I was "too fat" hmmmmm....... really sad.

hmmm. that is rough. But on the other hand, I am so glad that I am not the only one that has ever endured this, and I hope that everyone here can use this as a spill all, and even make "light" of it (no pun intended at all)

Using up all that energy IS EXERCISE!!! LOL! Wow that is cool, I did know u had a son. The sad part in all that is I already know that I need to chill, what is even sadder is that I dont get invited to parties because I am the fat girl, I have been told that several times. This is the most awful little town in the world, I think its worse than Ehtiopa, at least there I would be skinny. The ironic part is your son's b-day, is the same as the friend in the above story. Its just, he snapped, he wasnt always like that. I think I am a comfort level for him, he runs over everyone that cares about him and opts for those who dont, then cries to the ones that care about the ppl he has problems with. I dunno I dont feel so bad anymore, it's just, why do ppl around u snap when you want to have this surgery?

Uhc Sucks!

Well, I went shopping yesterday, and for once people actually helped me and asknowledged me inside the store (I am talking about the sales people). Then someone had to ruin it and say, hey you are really funny and cute for a big girl! Thank GOD I was in a good mood, and said, "wel you are pretty helpful for a scrawny guy!"

For once in my life I had the courage to go in to stores where I knew that nothing would fit, but I decided to get a preview lol. I did not find a lot of clothes for school this year, but got enough to tide me over, I WILL be losing a lot of weight throughout the year anyway. For once, I was not embarassed and I was not depressed, my mom and I did not fight over fits or over my horrible attitude. I am the worst person to shop with, mainly because I can not find things that are in style and that fit, and that I can afford. Anyways, I went into American Eagle (no nothing fits me there) and bought a little necklace and key chain with some charms that go on it. Well basically I was helping out a cause, the necklace was $1, the keychain was $1, and the charms are $1 a piece. I bought the necklace and 2 charms to go on them. I got Believe and Strength because I know I will need it to get through all this to be a more improved me. I thought this was a great idea especially since when you purchase these items, 1/2 of the purchase goes to American Eagle's Live Your Life Foundation. If you get the chance go by there and support yourselfs, and others with this simple purchase. There are all kinds of charms that can go on the necklace, some are: hope, dream, and strength. Just try it, oh yeah, can't wait to be able to shop at Rue21!!!! Checkout this website to see the AE cause: http://www.aeliveyourlife.com

I am yet to be banded also, the insurance said to call back on Tuesday to see if they had made up their minds yet. Everyone hope, wish, and pray with me so I can get this, I need it so bad

I am trying to decide where I want to move after I graduate and am looking for ppl that live there that may can give me some advice about living there.

Wow Goodluck!

Thank ya'll a lot, I really need you all. I am so glad I found this website back in April

well, maybe what happened to you happened for a reason. If you had not had the experience at work, and gotten on here for advice and went through the appropriate procedures at work, then maybe you would have reacted differently (more defensively) to your daughter's problem. Maybe the thing at work was practice for your patience. So just make it another blessing.

Wow, vinesqueen, you don't know how much of a hero you are to me, I have read your posts on "who has the craziest parents" and for you to be as fun loving a caring for your son as you are is a miracle and act of God because so many ppl would have turned around in bitterness and done the same to their kids just so the kids would know what they had to go through as a child. I have not done anything amazing, or even heroic, or even been through all that much, but sometimes it feels like too much. I do however see a psychiatrist because of stems from when I was little (I have always been depressed). Dragonwilo you really should try to see a therapist about the incident, and possible other incidents from your childhood (including your mom making you diet and never being accepting of you). I find it is soooooooooo much easier to speak to someone you don't know, one-on-one, because you don't feel like you have to hide anything, and you are not going to lose a friend by speaking to them about it because they are not your friend yet. The therapist will soon become the friend that you can tell anything and they aren't going to reject you for thinking that way. I started going about a year ago, I was DEEPLY depressed, and could not just come out and say it because my mom doesnt believe in therapy and anti-depressents to this day. I would hurt sooooooo bad inside that I did begin to cut myself, and yes I have scars, but I would just freak on anything. I felt like everyone was leaving me, I couldnt trust anyone, especially guys (all my friends, including my bf, had moved during this period) and I felt like no one cared whether I lived or died. So, I went to the therapist, I was shady at first, I was very untrusting, but the 2nd meeting I showed her my cuts and bruises (when I couldnt cut I scratched) and explained to her my nightmares I had been having. I was scared, I felt like 3 ppl in one person, not like multiple personalities or something, just couldnt ever make up my mind about things. Sometimes I would take pills to try to kill myself, and by some miracle I lived through those days. I have always been depressed, and wished I was dead, but I am alive for some reason, becuase as much meds as I have taken I honestly shouldnt have a liver right now. Within 2 months of hypnotherapy, my nightmares went away, I stopped cutting everyday (went down to once or twice a month) and now I am completely clean. I can manage my meds, feel good about myself (well most of the time, most of you have read my posts and know what I mean), and am just ready to get my life back together. I believe this surgery is the final step in getting my life back together, to finally be "normal" and maybe not so defensive about stuff. Just about 3 months ago, I had a private ceremony where I took the box that I kept all my depressed drawings, letters, diary entries, everything, and burnt it, box and all. I felt soooo good while it was burning, I prayed over it and burnt it with incense and certain flower petals. It felt like it was finally out of me, but lately with all the pain, breaking up with my bf, fighting, my recently widowed crazy gma gettin married, and denials and stuff, I have been really depressed, but I hope I don't dip down again. It isnt me, Jodie, that dips down, I am a whole other person, I look and sound diff, but I am aware of it. I dunno I really am crazy, so thank GOD for Welbutrin and Trazadone

Originally Posted by Marimaru I do some consulting work in the horseracing industry, and was working at at race track one day in a booth training some people. I was talking to a co worker, and I hear "Hey, fat girl! Fat girl!" I turn, and it's this older guy in a wheel chair (who had at least 30 lbs on me anyway) and he says "You wanna know why fat girls always hang out with skinny chicks? It's because they know they'll have something left over when the skinny girl is done!" I didn't even know what to say. I couldn't say any of the things racing through my head, because while I wasn't a track employee, I was a representative for another company, so he was by proxy my 'customer'. I suddenly had a very important phone call I had to make and walked away. OMG!!! Well if he was in a wheel chair let's see, he could have always had a freak accident on a handicap ramp right?? What about being a friendly neighbor and um... hitting a big bump or 2 or 3 lol! I am mean I know, but they made me that way.

Hi, just thought the other was getting really crowded and I wanted to post some pics, but thought they may get lost in all those other wonderful pics. I'll post my pics later, when I have time to get them loaded onto here (I have 56k modem) lol, but ya'll enjoy.

LOL! My ex, yes a teenaged boy, never wanted to have sex, except for 3 times, and we only did it once on prom night! Ha, think about my self esteem, I felt horrible, then realized he didnt get turned on by thinner girls either, so hmmmmmm makes me wonder, how bout ya'll??? LoL, sex what's sex??? LOL

lol, this is so weird. I can't remember the name of the steakhouse, but its awesome! SUCH A SMALL WORLD!

Hey Teresa, my dad works in Idabel every like 4 weeks, I have been there on several occassion. There is a great little steakhouse there lol. What a small world