j_war06

ummmm Carlene, help me here, I just woke up.....How is this relevant? Like Im not trying to be rude, or disrespectful to your research or anything, just confused.... Oh and the Associated Press (I know they are viable) however, is a not a good source. Its too general. Like, here, anything I turn in with AP on it, is automatically deducted for not having enough sources or something like that. They are great for reading, but not for quoting. You have to find a private study and research article, those are great for quoting, because they are unique and come directly from a person. And a fact is anything that can be proven right or wrong, remember that when you read figures, compare them to what other places are saying. Do they have a bias? Probably, and possibly a big one because it is politics afterall.

Ive been seeing a professional for 3 years...and shes wonderful, but I cant see her now because I moved away, plus all the money for that ran out. I used up all my dad's savings on medical bills. See I was a seriously depressed person growing up. As a kid as young as 1st or 2nd grade, I was wanting to commit suicide. I wanted to die, because of all the torment i went through as a child from my peers and from other adults, family members etc....Ive attempted suicide countless times, tried drowning twice, tried overdosing (which it is a wonder I am still here), poisoning, and crashing my own car on purpose. Also I was a cutter. I had cuts on my arms, hands, legs, thighs, abdoman, and if I ran out of places, even my private area, just to get the pain to focus somewhere else besides on the inside. I would take different chemicals and rub them into the wounds to make the worse too, so they would hurt more. So basically, Im doing a whole lot better. Im no longer on medication, i cant take pills any more because of the surgery (i dont care my Dr. said no pills for me). I dont know I just need to buck up and get over it I suppose. I remember my past though, and its hard to let go of something like that. Something that hurt so bad, something that messed you up so bad inside that you wanted to die. I was on meds for about 4 years (all through high school) but all I used them for was to get high or try to OD. Then I became responsible with them when I started seeing my therapist. In case you guys didnt know, when I started seeing the psychiatriast I had a few symptoms of MPD and a few symptoms of a little bit of Schizophrenia (not a lot or anything, just a little bit), plus I am a major OCD. Its funny how my friends dont know this, and hardly ever notice, especially my OCD. Im not saying I have the previous 2, Im saying I exhibited symptoms of those two, but now I rarely have an MPD moment, and no more Schizo for the most part. Its contained now, it could have gotten worse, but my parents finally looked under my jeans and long sleeved shirt i always wore, and found the marks. By that time I looked like a Blood Tiger or something. It was time to get some help. It scares me of what would have happened had I not gone to see my doctor.

Actually, just last night i had a professor comment on one of the girls in my classes weight. She had taken him in a previous semester. She walked in late and the worst thing in the world happened, he said "Hello Ms. Ramos, glad to see your holidays went well, I see you drank a lot of alcohol and ate plenty of holiday food." OMG I could have died because I weigh a good 60 lbs more than she does, so I automatically began to think, "What is he gonna say about me?" I need this class, there is no dropping it. Also, my college doesnt have too many big girls, and if they do, they are just that, big girls, not obese or MO or anything. A little overweight or just plain overweight, mostly all under 200lbs. You dont see many that are obese or MO, I think I have seen like 3 or 4 MO, and a little more than that obese all year. ITS very discriminatory in my classes, the way you look. I am blond hair green eyed, "fat" girl. you know God wasted his time on my looks because he put me in a horrible body! Im not ugly by far, I know that, not to sound cocky, but I wanted you guys to know that I dont think that. Ive always been told how it was a waste for me to be so pretty and be so big. I sit in my classes, I am the ONLY blond! PERIOD! The only one out of 30-50 people, ONE BLOND. That is this semester, there were a few more last semester. I get it for that. However if I was Blonde and Thin, think of all the attention I would get in that field. No I dont have to be the center of attention, mainly because I dont know what that feels like, so I guess not. Im not loud and overbearing whatsoever, remember, they apparently dont hear me speaking. I was asked to leave conversation A, because it did not have anything to do with me, a friend of mine was trying to talk to a boy she liked and vise versa, I had no place in that conversation, it was definately a 2 person relationship. The other one I had no business in because it was the guy's best friend and my friend, and they were discussing something private between those two....it was none of my business whatsoever.....just felt weird, although i had no place in either conversation. I miss all the attention i got from going to the club....I dont go any more because of some drama, and school started back. Im probably going tomorro night tho. I love the way the gay guys compliment me and pay attention to me! Give me stuff and be so nice to me. The girls there dont even hit on me, they know I am straight, and they arent all judgemental on my weight NeWay. I feel comfortable there, hell i practically work there lol! I just want to find that one special guy that can soften my heart. Put up with my crazy antics. Listen to what I say. But put me in my place when I am wrong. A real man will stand up to me, but not be mean or rude, just stand up for themselves. I dunno??? I cant afford counseling by the way, my psychiatrist lives about 8-9 hours away and shes the only one I could ever trust with my head....Not to mention we cant afford it anymore anyways. Guys Im not depressed, i have a good time, i am happy with life, i just wish i was happier with life.....

Actually its the Iraqi War that is not approved of by 68% of POLLED Americans (many of whom, probably didnt vote)....Not necessarily Bush. I like George W Bush, I just dont like the War in Iraq. His approval rating and that of the war are different, however related ofcourse, but can vary and differ

No, I have gotten to where I really dont contribute, unless I REALLY know what I am talking about, its important to state, and I feel strongly about the subject. I doubt they would care anyway. Ive had one professor give me the time of day, and thats only because I was the ONLY person who understood Oedipus Rex, the only one that had read it and could explain it at all....My Theatre class was full of people who didnt really care to be there, so I was the only one that knew ANYTHING about Theatre....In fact I knew so much I was told that I didnt have to come to class if I didnt want to at all. I still made a B. He forgot omit me from the quizzes, but it wouldnt be fair for me to make an A, so I didnt say anything. Others make me feel invisible, no matter what Im nothing but a little "who" in their ears. Every now and then a "Horton" comes along and listens to me. Someday I want to be a Somebody, I want to be heard, I want people to listen, and engage in conversation......I speak loudly and they just talk over me or just walk off, whatever. Tonight I was told by one of my friends to go "over there" (meaning away for a minute) while she and a guy she likes talked (which is fine by all means) but I walked over to my other friends and they told me to go back "over there" because they were speaking privately, so Im like a loner boner out there, standing between two conversations, equally distanced, so not to over hear either one. I dunno, atleast they acknowledged my prescense. I didnt mind, I understand private conversations, I would rather someone tell me to walk off for a minute, than them whisper right in front of me, because then I would get paranoid. I dunno, Im going to drown my recently renewed sense of depression (Ill probably be pretty much fine tomorrow, besides pissed about being invisible that sort of thing). Im not going to cry myself to sleep or anything, I dont cry anyway. I can probably count how many times Ive cried since I was a baby (and even then it wasnt often) on my hands. I really have no emotion left, and its due to society. My best friend here thinks my heart is black lol! Im not mean to anyone, if anything Im too nice, even to my enemies.....however I have no sympathy for others because I have gone through so much without any emotion or help from others, and I have made it out alive, and I am a strong person for the most part. I have never had anyone sit down and actually talk to me, except my ex-boyfriend. He still listens to me, we have real conversations still! He is the only person who cares. who has ever cared, in real life. I dunno what I would do without you guys, you at least acknowledge what I say, even if you disagree.....maybe if we were to engage in face-to-face conversation it may be different, but here I feel recognized........I just wish I could have a life like the skinny, pretty girls I went to HS with. They have everything!

I do, I carry myself well. Ive tried everything in the world. I feel like the "Who" in "Horton Hears a Who", No matter how much I yell, and scream, and clatter, and clash (figuratively speaking ofcourse) I dont get noticed. There is always someone better. See I have always held my head up high, especially since Ive gone to college. I dont care, there are 300,000 ppl in this city so wat if 10, or hell, 100 of them dont like me or even more! Its just the fact that Ive tried different things with different ppl. Ive tried snobby stuck up bitch mode (Which works for lots of girls), Ive tried really nice big girl, Ive tried being the comedian, Ive tried speaking out, Ive been outgoing.....But Im not just one of these things, I am in reality a combination of all of them, almost weighing equally....Yet none of them in moderation nor extreme gets me noticed. Professors dont even hear me, even when I speak loudly (im naturally loud) I am by no means in any way shy at all. I am always myself, no matter who I am around, although I respect them enough to not say things around them, or do things around them, or talk about certain things when I am with them. The gay guys always buy me drinks at bars and clubs and tell me how great my hair is, how pretty I am, how my boobs look good in that shirt, or if my ass looks good whatever......Its like I need to be a gay man to get anyone! lol! I grew up in a small town, probably everyone I am "friends" with now from there (I only see them every 2-3 months or so), talked badly about me behind my back and to my face growing up, but I have put the past behind me and I hang out with them when they call me. I didnt beg to be their friend, they came to me. No, they have never apologized, but I accept their hospitality. EVEN in my family I feel invisible, I am the first one to go to college, yet they could care less what I am doing with my life. I swear I could be homeless and the only people that would care would be my parents. They dont even come see me when I am in, I end up going and seeing them the day before I leave to go back to college.....If I talk about college, they just cover my voice with another conversation. People tend to ignore anything coming from my mouth, they just start another completely off-topic situation over the sound of my voice. I want to be looked at, I mean I look like (clothes and makeup, style-wise) and short chunky Paris Hilton most of the time. Designer shoes, handbag, make-up, nice clothes (I never ever wear t-shirts unless I have them dressed up with other shirts layered), I never wear sneakers, ever. I wear heels when Im not walking to class. My nails and toes are perfectly manicured and pedicured. I have long blond hair (natural) and its always in a updo, straightened, or curled with a curling Iron. Yet I still introduce myself to ppl around me, and Im not too nice, I never want to be seen as fake, after meeting someone. I just feel like I dont matter, whats the point in getting all dolled up, if no one cares. ps. I tried the whole dress down look, doesnt work either......Im just invisible

Exactly, that is why it is funny to us PoliSci majors, its an absolutely ridiculous idea when you think about it. I mean really the US is on a hopeless pointless mission there and we are only causing trouble. Our noses belong in Afghanistan, dealing with 9/11 terrorists, threats that we know for sure are after us, not "possible threats to democracy". Democracy can not be forced, but instead must come from within. I just sat through 4 classes today back to back, and all of them discussed the war in Iraq, Ive been talking about Bush and the war since about 2pm today and its almost 9pm and I just finished all my classes, and discussions about Bush lol! Popular subject...NeWayz the US needs to worry about its citizens, and its Democracy, and its safety instead of some other country that is a hopeless cause. You cant force any kind of government on any one, and even if you do, they mostly likely will resort back to their old way of government. Take a look at the situation in Venezuela right now, just for example.

lol BJean, your probably right, he is probably missing some of his crayons. And I dont think that he is necessarily heartless, just greedy. He is a politician, and he is concerned about his private agenda, and will get rid of anyone who gets in his way. Politicians have to be self-centered in reality, and they have to be over-confidant and many other qualities you wouldnt necessarily think of. It is suprising what Bush, and ONLY Bush knows compared to everyone else in the entire country. He lets people know what he wants them to know. Its an interesting discussion really. Well Im have class at 5:30 (Contemporary Political Analysis) Which is pretty much this thread all together lol! I am by far not a Bush supporter, but I wasnt a supporter of Kerry either. lol I just think that the past Presidential Election was lacking in the area of candidates.

Lol I will trade ya! Im 19 going on 20, and all the guys that hit on me are early-mid thirties up to the forties! lol Ive been trying to find someone in their mid twenties forever.....THAT WASNT LOOKING FOR A HOOKUP lol

LOL I just came back from my Public Policy Class, and the genius behind me raised his hand and said this brilliant sentence, "Why dont we just divide Iraq by religon, then put enough space between them and a fence so they cant have civil war." Number one, Civil war is going to happen (regardless if the US is there or not, especially since the death of Sadaam), Number two (Look at Russia and that whole part of Europe), and Number 3, what are we going to do, put them in corners and tell them not to look, touch, or speak to one another? In theory his plan would work, in reality, not so much lol! We all got a good laugh out of that....Ok PoliSci ppl laugh at weird things, but HEY atleast we UNDERSTAND the joke.....I agree GW Bush isnt the brightest crayon in the box, but hes not stupid....He knows what is going on and the lack of knowledge bestowed unto us from the government makes us think he is an idiot, and the fact he has no public speaking skills.

I want to apologize for how uneducated my previous posts were, I really did not mean them to come out so ignornant. I had just come home from a party and decided to get online since I was bored and could not sleep. I dont want to delete because there were some interesting points made in reference to my posts, but just know that I really did not mean to sound so much like a biggot idiot.

I really love the way Canadians gripe about the way the US is always in other countries businesses, however, they are always trying to tell us how our government should be run. Sorry, but we fought for our form of government, and we will run it the way we want, we dont care what you say, you have fought for nothing. We have shed blood for what we have and if it succeeds or fails, at least we know we fought for what we wanted, and for now it is working. Anything could happen in the future (I mean hundreds of years from now, not just in 50 years). Im sorry Im picking on you, dont take it too personal I just had a few Canadians in my classes really piss me off this semester......

All I can say is Bush is a much better Prez than Kerry would have been, and he is doing his job, and he does it rather well in reality, if you look at it. The problem is, society wants someone to blame, so they blame the govt. and specifically the presidents. Simple put, everyone is gonna bitch no matter what, so just go with which is better at the job. Society needs someone to blame about being poor, being unemployed, being sick, being anything, so they aim for the govt, and it will always happen no matter what is done............so whatever, im poor, im unemployed, I dont blame the govt, I blame society for not being accepting of my size (mostly), its not the government's fault. I like Bush, I like his policies, his really big flaw is he isnt a great speaker, and it makes him look like an idiot, when in reality he is most likely rather intelligent, I mean he does have the most stressful job ever! and rather complicated also.......TRUST me it takes smarts to be in politics, if you dont actually, in depth study it, you wouldnt understand how complicated it can get. So there is something to think about

Some weird things are happening lately...................Im doing my band PERFECT! No soda, no fat, no sugar, under 1000 cals a day and the doctor says the weight FALLS off teenagers. I had to go get a fill last week because I was constantly HUNGRY! But sometimes you cant force food down my throat, Im not losing weight, I might loose some now that I have had a fill, but none yet. Im constantly tired and I feel like I am still eating a pretty good amount of food at a sitting. I just feel SOOOOOOOOO tired ALLLLL the time and I AM NOT DEPRESSED, like I couldnt be feeling happier for once I always look on the positive side of everything. Im bruising from the littlest bumps and scarring from the smallest scrapes. Im getting headaches and some fevers and muscle aches and strains. I get the munchies really REALLY bad at night and dont feel like eating at all during the day. My spine hurts (literally my spine) Im light-headed a lot and just sometimes dont feel well, although there is nothing wrong with me. Its almost like being drunk, and this isnt good for me having to drive everyday. I had a fill a week and a half ago and the wound from that still hasnt healed (he hit a blood vessel, which is common and painless just looks bad) and my recent Nose Piercing isnt healing quickly either (it bled the other day, and its not infected.) Yall Im seriously thinking about going and getting some blood work done, I guess I need to before I go to college anyway, but Im so afraid that nothing will be wrong, but I just have a gut feeling that something is wrong in my body no matter how small it may be, somethings just not right...... *edit* Not to mention these mood swings where every little thing in the world can bother the piss outta me, and then I can care less to break something, its sooooooooo odd. I get so mad about the littlest things anymore and I am usually super easy going. Frankly I cant stand to be around peoples' kids anymore and I just hate being around ignorant people now, where as I used to be just like whatever, believe what you want, I dont care, NOW all I wanna do is argue! Ive gotten plain out mean people! For some odd reason I am MEAN to people!!!!! Yall pray for my Mom and Dad because they catch the most of it (and NO I dont think it is at all connected to any certain time of the month! Its a constant thing!)

ALL I have to say is: "Always the friend, never the girlfriend" (or even hook-up buddy). Why is it that so many other ppl, people I would consider to be rather distasteful, still get to have a little fun, and date, and meet ppl that sort of thing. Not me. I never, ever get asked out or hit on by "the guy" its always some guy 10-12 years older than me. Which age isnt a big deal to me, but Im rather young and they are probably looking for different things than I am right now. I dunno, its hopeless I think, I get interested in guys, then end up having to hook them up with friends of mine so that they can find a relationship. Why arent I attractive to STRAIGHT guys? Oh YEAH the gay guys love me lol! And I love them, and I wish they were straight, because no straight guy is never as nice and sensitive, yet can be manly and what not as a gay guy, I swear it would kill them to have manners sometimes. Its just with my age group the size of your body is EVERYTHING, no guy wants to date the fat chick at this age (and some never grow out of it). I mean I dont even think its my weight sometimes, because much bigger girls than me get way more action than I do!!! I guess Im destined to be single, but Im telling you guys, Im not one for take backs, but if my ex boyfriend walked through that door right now, with the way he's been treating me, and asked me to take him back, I would in a heart beat...I miss him so much because I dont have anyone like that in my life anymore...I dont have a guy to be affectionate with or whatever,I have the Gay Mafia, and they arent much help lol!

hey guys thanks for this, I barely ever can eat, ans definately not in the morning becuz of the mucus! Im glad im not the only one

I posted this in response to assholes comments Maybe you should try to feed your high metabolism with healthier options other than McDonalds. You know, fast food causes more than obesity. So obesity is not the only, although leading, cause of the deletion of the supersize option. I myself chose to have weight loss surgery. NO ONE OTHER THAN MYSELF PAID FOR THAT. I paid $15,000 in cash for the surgery, that makes me no different than little miss 110lbs Barbie who wants DD breast implants, a nose job, and liposuction to sculp her almost perfect body. I have been overweight my entire life, from birth I was a big kid. I continued to grow, despite my inability to eat as a child. I was lucky to get down one meal a day until I was about 12. Thats when my overeating started. I was anorexic for a year, and when I was treated for it, I started eating two meals a day. Sometimes healthy, sometimes not. I definately always made healthier choices than most of my peers and best friends who were normal weight. I understand that some people could just help themselves. And had I been skinny from the get go I may feel the same as you, who knows. Just keep in mind that you must have love for your fellow man, although you dont have to like them at all. Many large people have emotional eating problems (thank God I didnt) and they eat because of these exact comments you are making right now, which makes them bigger, which contributes to your bitching. I promise you should have no issue with me because you did not contribute one pretty penny to my weight loss surgery.

I also have a tendency to get stomach virus symptoms during this time. sorry I had more thoughts on the subject. I wonder why I cant eat and you all can? Also, because of the stomcah virus symptoms, I end up losing about 5lbs during this time, sometimes I gain it back and sometimes I dont, its about a 50/50 split. I dont know, I hate it during that time because I cant eat, and thats one of the worst feelings in the world. Being hungry and not being physically able to eat. Like everything I put in my mouth I just throw right back up during that time. Hmmmm.......How odd this is?

Man, I must be weird. Im lucky to get a shake down during that time! I cant eat anything the week before, of, or a few days after! I get so tight that nothing goes down at all! Which sux because I have cravings!

I paid $15,000 out of my pocket for this surgery with Dr. Spiegel in Texas. My insurance did not cover the surgery

Thats all I wanted was tolerance to my POV, not even understanding. Ofcourse I can tolerate other people's opinions, I deal with them ALLLLl the time. I definately lean conservative at the polls, but Im in COLLEGE and very few ppl my age are conservatives. I deal with it alll the time in class discussions and all that is needed it for someone to make VALID points, even if they are opinion based, rather than something totally off the wall. I dont believe that most of the ppl on this poll are tolerant of me or my opinion. I think its quite funny how people get so mad on here. Ive been laughing so hard for like a week now, I try to write calmy and with sobriety and with maturity as much as I can so as not to stoop to that level of ignorance and intolerance. To get mad over something like this is crazy, or to actually care. Quite frankly it gives me something to do during class.

I am super excited about the results, Ive been calling it as Perry for Gov, and right now thats the way the vote looks! Life experience is important, but why let us vote if you dont believe we have enough experience to do so? I have life experience, I do my part as much as possible...Ive been repsonsible for the well-being of others, Ive paid my own bills, I live life, I just still have the ability to have freedom because Im not married or have kids (which is a looooooooooooooong ways down the road). I know they are not picking on me at a personal level, thats how debate works, its not the person its the opinion, the point-of-view. But when is enough life experience. Why doesnt a 50 year old pick on a 30 year old, surely their life experience can not be deemed equal? And if so, how so? I am little baffled by the logic, but what is scary is that it does make sense to me somewhat...

Lol, after I posted it I did realize it came across as threatening, but I dont really mean it as a threat haha! I get what you all are saying, but just because I am young, doesnt mean my vote or my opinion doesnt matter. I think this is why most people my age do not vote, because they feel they dont count, because our opinions are knocked really hard by other generations.

Thank you very much, you have done the same. We all cant agree all the time. I dont believe my way is the only way, and it may not always be the right way. But it is my opinion after all. I thank you and only you for your MATURITY that you have shown throughout this thread. Everyone else has taken the attitude that my opinion doesnt matter because I am young. I may be young, but I do know what I believe right now, as you said, it could change, and it is very possible some day. I dont believe that any consenting adult should be scorned for their opinion on political matters. My ballot should come in the mail soon, I love voting, its one of my favorite things in the world to do, weird I know, but I during elections this past Spring, I would skip class just to go vote and help with voting. I love the American Political System and I love to study it. Im excited about next semester because I am taking 3 more POLS classes (Religon and Politics, American Judicial System, and Public Policy). I just want all of you who scorn the youth of today, especially those of us who will be working in politics when you get really old, that we will have the power in legislation, and trust me the government is rather volatile right now. So keep up with your remarks and your gumdrops and daisies attitudes and see where it will lead in the next 20-30 years...Just remember that my generation will have the upper hand in Government one day, so dont knock us too hard.

Oh my parents and I have always had a close relationship. she is having empty nest syndrome, but I cant come home all the time, number one I dont want to, and number two its too far. I moved this far away so I wouldnt be home alllll the time. They were involved in every thing I did, like I did Theatre and they totally came to my plays even though they have no taste for theatre, they helped out a ton with Project Grad. But My mom JUST started doing this like 2 weeks ago, the last time I went home due to unfortunate circumstances, and ever since then she has tried to extend a leash all the way where I live now! Its crazy