spldgrl

hedwig- sounds like you have your hand full. If family services is involved, are you able to be a "kinship care foster parent" basically that is the state has custody and you are the foster parent. that way, you recieve a provider check each month to pay for the childrens needs. In MT after 18 months of continued foster placement or state custody the parental rights are severed and the child is place for permentnt adoption. Sounds to me like you need a CASA GAL here, it is an attorney who probono (free) the child as advocate between state, court, parents, and foster parent. Our casa gal just happened to be our family attorney whom my husband has known for 20+ years. He helped alot and took those fights to the next level when I couldnt. Your right birth parents have all the rights, in our case a newborn to 11 month old had none, and that was the hardest to handle. good luck to you and bless yo for keeping those kids safe. please email me if you have any questions or just need to bend an ear!

Cant even comment on how to respond, been married too long- 21 yrs. maybe he'll text back if not, "see ya"

puddin- I am so sick of the d--- compression garmet! I have 2 one is like granny panties but up to my boobs ( they are finally up there too or they'd be covering the damn thing) and snaps in the crotch PIA the other is the theigh type that still go soo tall that I can cover my new boobs with it. that one is open in the crotch so I wear panties too. There is no escape for the fat to go it just squishes in the garmet. How long did you have the telfa pads and ointment on the incisions? or did you? My next appt is next Thurs 9 days and the scars are healing so they itch like crazy but the telfa pads are making them hold the moisture. any thoughts? I will call Dr.Santin in am but for now any info will help! I cant believe your out lookin cute. I tried on jeans and had to wear my 14's so no binding. My daughter was mortified I would wear them as I guess their alittle big- before surgery I wore 10's gosh what a thing to bitch about pants too big!!! I told my husband its a good thing naked I look like the bride of frankenstein or I'd walk around town naked!! ok maybe just the house but still I'm lovin the everyday changes I actually think I look skinny- first time in my life I've felt that way about my body! Vanity hell, its great to feel good about yourself when youve spent a lifetime hating the way you look!! ok goodnight i'm itchen!

spydr, tummy tuck & breast lift done the18th. My recommendation would be to work out very faithfully and stregnthen your legs and lower back as these two muscles support you for your recovery time. The pain is not near what you would expect. The nerves are cut so you dont feel much there. the pain I had was first from the drains in my r breast and the stitches holding the muscles together forming the"six pack" I am 12 days out and feel great. I get tired easier that I thought and my back does ache as I cannot stand straight yet. As your inner muscles heal you can stand straighter but dont rush it or hands above head. If you feel a stain STOP Do you both have really good care person for afterwards? My husband is taking great care, but it is overwhelming for him. You will not be able to stand or sit without him. potty and showering for the first few days. Lucky me got my monthly visitor the day after surgery so I delt with that too as some things a girl must do on her own. By Tuesday- day 5 I felt better really try to stregnthen your back and legs. Best of luck to you if I can answer any questions or help let me know it is wonderful to see the results so fast. the girls were in place the first time I saw and that made this all worth it!!

karey- oh yea I miss him, we keep him o Wed. from 3-8 while birth mom goes to drug court and AA. I miss holding him and snuggling as I cant hold over 3 lbs. he doesnt understand so I try to give him room plus he is crawling and into everything! Our child services system sucks here, and the fight has been long 11 months but the parents have all the rights even the right to abuse and get child back if they show progress, not reform only progress. It is my sister so I may be more judgmental I know her past and such. We talked lastnight and she is very stressed having him full time and wondering when I could babysitt tues & wed so she could have a break??? anyway if you have open adoption you know what I mean. My youngest is 17 so I understand your position, life changing huh??? If birth mom is unable to care for him, we will adopt him and then I will be starting over like you for ever not just temporary care. OK Puddin, are you f'in nuts, no skydiving for me, I was thinking Victoria Secrets, Abercrombie, Arden B and martinis. No wonder the surgery didnt phase you, you are Wonderwoman, you even want to fly!!! take care

Jus did tt and breast lift- discount of $2,000 if done together- surgeon 8,050 and anatheiologist (sp) 1300. so 9350 and that covers everything from consult (fee taken off surgery price) and all after care, gurdles. wraps, 2 night stay at his surgical center operating apartment ( I live 130 miles from office) Yes, its a lot of money and I am fortunate husband gave me great Christmas gift of cash to pay for surgery. I would have done the financing of surgeries that is available, I will look for that info if anyone wants it is only for medical surgeries financing. I suggest to cover all basics, some dr.s charge for gurdles and wraps extra and after care too. I believe it is expected that you get prices and compare that is why they give 6 month quotes! good luck!

just had tt Jan. 17th. I was very concerned about the port ok obsessed with hurting the port. My excellent surgeon Dr. Santin was very honest he said he couldnt gaurentee me there would be no problems but he would do his very best, and he did. He explained that the port itself would move as it is sewn to the second set of muscles in the "six pack" of the stomach muscles. In surgery to provide the six pack, he had to tighten the muscles inward like in the center of your body and sew the muscles together. that is the pain in the surgery and why you cant stand up straight for 4-6 weeks for the muscles to heal together picture a six pack under rib cage in center of body, that is where the muscles are put in surgery. my port moved about 2" to the center but no higher or lower that I notice, but the scar is gone from banding. Everything is, was great! my surgeon was wonderful and well worth the 6 month consult wait and the 4 month surgery date. Research well the wait is worth it when the results are good. Hope this helped good luck

ok girls, heres my issue with the men thing- I have been married for 21 years- got married early and we have grown up together. We are best friends and he is great,,, (comma) you need to be girls- play, shop, take trips, have great fun in all you do!!! Men are great, yes sex is necessary HOWEVER, you have many many years to be with the man of your life and family and all this wonderful adventure with kids and in-laws and sharing holidays with other family but I promise you will miss the girlfriend time laughing and all the stuff girls do. When the time is right the men will appear dont waste time searching for him- enjoy life especially now with your new sexy bods- yes 10lbs, 5lbs lighter is sexier then before. OK, enough of that! No story, no pics posted not sure when I'll be ready for pics, but story in a nut shell: Banded May 2005 weighed in at 277lbs 5feet 5inches Obisity major issue in family mother had 5 strokes all related to weight and I didnt want to be like that on the road I would be there before I was 40yrs. Great job, as I was yelled at one day " I hope you enjoy your princess perfect life" and I was and am doing just that. Feb 2006 down 80 lbs feeling great career going great exercise having alife. teenage kids doing well- that princess life going great Feb 23, 2006 attorney calls, sister had baby addicted to meth, pot, and pcp 11 weeks early, weighed 3.3 lbs and state has taken costody he needs foster placement in nic-unit at hospital and will I do it- quit my job that day and never looked back- not even at my weight loss or band fills just this sick baby and getting no sleep. September 06- plastic surgeon calls, forgot I even sched. consult he has a very long wait list. Went to consult and weighed in down another 32 lbs from Feb- YEE HAWW that total was 112lbs gone. I was so busy with baby and social services CRAP that it just fell off. October 06 began exercising because of Jan surgery date for tt and bl just didnt know about this now strong and spoiled rotten wonderful baby boy I had been raising for 11 months would he live with me or his birth mom? hired a nanny and made plans to have the girls put in place and the fat & skin gone. God works in mysterious ways, baby went back to birth mom on Thursday and I had surgery on the next Thursday and here I am... I love the girls where they are supposed to be. I always been fat so they always sagged- now their purky and much smaller about a c cup alittle more as the swelling. I can see my hip bones and my tummy is flat with little pouges where swollen. The surgery went great- your right puddin not much pain, not near what youd expect from the hugh incisions. right now I feel like bride of frankinstein with blue titches all over 1 1/2 weeks will those are removed. I feel like a new woman loosing the weight felt great but then the skin was another confidence issue to face, with that gone I cant explain the place I am at mentally other than I feel like I own the world and that I look pretty damn HOT! Puddin- you know that feeling dont you? when you look in the mirror even with stitches dont you wonder " damn if I look this good now, what will I look like in 3 weeks?" Just take it easy, dancing, I cant even walk for 20 minutes iwthout my back hurting. Where in Utah are you? My daughter is in Salt Lake I am thinking of going to see her in March maybe we can hook up if you live near. OK enough is enough- take care my hands are numb

puddin- been thinking of you and wondering if you were super woman or what! I had tt and breast lift on Thursday-10 days ago. from your first post on this thread you were ready to go on day 2 and you had the whole body lift. I felt like a whimp. Did you have harder days after that you didnt post? Or are you Super Woman? I had 3 drains removed at once, one hurt like hell the others didnt even know he took out. The removal however changed my life everything is easier being able to move freer. Cant believe you are wearing jeans.. I wore my fat jeans last night for 30 mins to a bday party and was told by someone there that had tt she was told no jeans as theres no give and it can make the scars show more so until my surgeon answers the question on Wed no jeans for me. Has anyone head this before? How did you stand up or lay down? with only TT/BL my lower back hurt like --- is the back incision killing you? Your pics look great hopefully my tummy swelling goes down as nice as yours did in a few days. still not ready to post but like to see what to compare to. so thanks for the pics. Good luck and PS- forget looking for men, let them look for you cuz I am sure they will be once your standing up straight lookin hot in your new bod and youll have the delema of choosing!

Hi Jodi, Just looked at your profile as I am curious how tall you are?? Under 200 even if it is 196 is that still obese in your eyes? I see you are 18 right? Do you ever look at yourself and think " damn I'm gettin there!!!"? My journey started 2 yrs ago at 5'5" 277lbs, Today as fact, I am mentally preparing for tummy tuck and breast lift tomarrow at 7am. I weigh 174lbs which may seem like alot (still does to me) but I never did the scale I did clothing size and my comfort level. I wear a size 10 and medium afterwards an 8 cuz 10's are loose now. I NEVER thought I would be here. after this skin is gone I WILL look at myself and think I AM HOT!! but the journey is long and attitute is 99.9% If you think your hot others will too. The "F" girl to the skinny girl is a big change, yes I see others treat me different, but I treat them and myself different also. I smile at the airline stewards instead of ignore or give a snotty look to (so she wont take notice that the seat belt wont fit) Your pics show you are a beautiful girl, with what sounds like great style, sounds like you say you have alot going for you looks, friends, an active lifestyle, BUT... do you KNOW these things about yourself? until you do how do you expect others to? PS to all those skinny girls you mention- this is the bitch coming out- have you noticed they have something "not perfect" big nose, ugly hair, bad clothes style, wierd lips- something no one is perfect and you are on the right road. Heads up good luck!

My heart breaks for you and your daughter. It is something moms cant control and that sucks for us. It is harder to be the mom than we thought when our mom journey started. You are a great mom to go to such measures for your daughter- BIG HUG!!! You mentioned your sons are smaller and can eat a lot, I have and son and 2 daughters my son has always and will always be able to eat more than the girls just like hubby can eat more that me and be thin, that a fact in our house, I had to accept that and not compare to them. I TOTALLY agree with the ladies that said self esteem is SOOO important. a friends 13 yrold daughter went thru same wight issues kids teasing ect. My 17 yr daughter is same size, so we had clothes try on night to show tayla that she is cute and can wear cute clothes. Her mom went to walmart and target because " they have clothes to fit her" but they didn;t fit, she went to the "fat chick" dept and wore old lady clothes - for a 13 yr old- she needed gap, old navy, trend, ect. We gave Tayla lots of clothes that she loved felt were trendy and in style. Take your daughter shopping or have a younger but older than her friend take her, get her hair done all those great ideas mentioned above and watch her. Does she stand taller, her shoulders back. When she feels good about herself those "fat days" will be less and less often. We all feel better when you look better to ourselves. even new hair do's lift the spirits of most. ANd hey, get yourself a new "do" too sounds like mom needs a hug too! Good luck, and stay strong these kids will kill us!

just for my 2 cents worth, my mother 58 and 5 strokes later had to do something! she was well over 250lbs and growing. due to strokes she is physically unable to move"fast" for the gym so she did nothing. Susan is absolutly right, you must be in arobic state, not dying. I started with a personal trainer 4 months ago, and the results are amazing, to start 7 min. on treadmill was it, now 45 because she knows what she is doing and the focus is on me alone. no gym setting to distract. So, sent my mom 3 weeks ago. she loves it she works out for 1 hr, it is 4 min on treadmill, and whatever works for her needs. She is stronger, and walks more smoothly and has more arm control. best of all, she is happier. Those 2 days a week have made great impact on the other 5 a week in just 3 weeks. not to mention the accountability- someone to call her and say, "hey, get off your butt and get here" helps too. Best of luck to you, I promise you will be happier, stronger and more able to care for all of those people ( yes puppies too) that need you if you take this time for yourself to exercise.

as I have lost weight I have noticed I am cold too and it is COLD here in Montana today- 11'

Well, only 5 days to go!! going to Vegas today, in an hour, then only 3 days till TT and BL- Telly, did you have a fill before or was your band pretty tight when you had your TT? My plan is to have a small fill on Tues. wait things out and then surgery on Thurs. 7:15am. my hope is to be tight enough i dont eat like i have been. I work out alot with a trainer-(think her goal is to kill me some days) so eating the extra calories is ok as I am burning appx 500-800 cal 3 days a week. I have stayed the same weight since October 3rd but I have lost 2 sizes of pants and feel GREAT! working out is really the answer for power but this extra skin and boobs on my knees is crap- therefore Thursday!! I dont want to eat or snack alot when I am not burning those calories so I think I will need a fill. Dr. thinks I will loose enough fat & skin for 2 pant sizes- do you think you lost that much? seems like alot, didnt realize there was "that much" there extra. I am worried in order to get that much my boobs will lift up and where my boobs are now will be my stomach! yeah, what a worry. Any words of wisdom to keep my sanity for mon-thurs. let me know!

WOW sounds like my life. Like the others I only have experience, unfortunatly. so here goes take what you will. I have 3 children current ages 20,18,17 here is their senior story. oldest daughter- met boy jr year at work "true love" total loser! lived with parents, 21 yrs old, no education ect... Jennifer was leaning toward child advocate attorney until... I told her what I thought and demanded she be at home a decent time follow rules ect. one day I came home and she had packed her stuff and moved out- no idea where she was. she was 18 so she took me off of everything. the school would not give me info as she took me off the release info. didnt see or know her where abouts for 4 months Nov-Feb first of March- drugs ect into picture so we sent her away option- go to school or jail So she took school I paid 20,000 for education and she works currently at Victoria Secrets and is living with losser #2 in another state not a good relationship! Son senior year met a girl and turned down full ride football schlorship to play house- bit my tongue and tried to stay calm in front of him, I did lecture alot just not demand. current, girl left he called football coach arranged meeting and starts school in Jan. and has to work extra had to prove to coach if wants to play- oh year only$4000 now he has big loans he will have to pay. Stephanie, my brat- UGGGH! leaning strong on her to go she only wants beauty school so ok if she is happy and going OK! but she is demanding and the world is all about her and the hell with anything else. she has no reality financially daddy has taken good care of her. latest thing is she wants a new car, 2007 and cant understand why not right this minute. I am ready to send her to her sister- (They dont talk either) So from my perspective and experience Fight your battles and pick the ones well, as you will only win 1-2. I would rather let me kids call me they will be late then spend the nights not knowing if they are even alive. days and weeks go by and you dont know anything if they move out. My sons just has to call me if not home by midnight and come let me know he is home and no drinking and driving he actually has called me to pick him up so I know this way works. we have a better relationship and I dont have those horrible sleepless nights and waking up worried wondering if she is alive or if anyone will even call me if she isnt. So talk to her tell yourself to be calm and in control explain that you need respect and if she want to be grown up then to act like it and be respectful. If she wants a kids perspective maybe we can hook our girls up, Jennifer is late on her bills has moved 4-5 times in 6 months lives in a shit hole and has nothing. all she has to do is be respectful right Wow all that venting- crap I must be crazy to have lived thru all that crap and then take on a foster baby! what was I thinking doing that again- OK I need a drink yes Water its only 3:17

Hey Trish, long time- If you get a group going I would fly over, as the foster baby I have will be leaving me in mid Nov, Nov. 21st for sure full time with birth mom, so I will need activity until Jan 8 then I will stress over my TT & BL surgery on the 25th. let me know- Great Idea, in newest addition of OH there is guidelines for wls support group ideas and stuff if interested> How are you feeling? Great talking to you-Brenda

Paula, today I talked to my friend, Tayla eats under protest as she was in hospital mon & Tues she passed out! thing is she is NOT fat she wears a size 9! I know this because she wears my daughters clothes. My daughter talked to her Tues. and told her in teenager terms that this guy was an ass and that she couldn't be fat unless she thought Stephanie was cuz they are the same. thankfully she did not mention the age difference. i am concerned because Tayla is getting a lot of attention now, I dont want her to think this is a good way to be the center of attention. she is getting counsdeling now that hospital is involved. When talking to the principal, Amy was also told the kid has home problems! Well, adressthe home problems!! That is a cop out on the school part. I know the family and like your bully, the suspension is a fun day at home alone! He should have school consequences that cause him embarrassment. Its funny to see my kids defend Tayla, they werent so strong for themselves> except for my youngest Stephanie. Sometimes you gotta be the bitch anf she can be! she was called a bitch by some girl in 9th grade, she walked up to her and confronted her, of course girl not so tuff when confronted. Same girl harrassed my oldest that year, all she did was cry so it continued until.... One very cold night, around 3 degrees a group of kids came to sit in hot tub, she arrived with the group, when Stephanie told me who she was, I told her this was Jennifer & Stephanies home and she was not welcome in the hot tub or house, her friends would not leave so she sat in her truck w/ heater on until they were ready to leave! I thought its too cold should let her in the house, but hey she could have gone home no one keeping her here. A few days later she apologized to girls and commented how shocked she was at what a bitch I was, my girls laughed- "you should see her pissed off" not friends ever, but no harrassing. Again sometimes itis good to be the bitch to protect our kids. not to mention other kids see and stay away too. Good luck, just remember to do what is right for you and your family we all have stories, but our lives are different too! Good luck! your son knows you love him and that matters most

Oh so gald to see this post- hope you dont mind I have questions that I'm stressing about- I am scheduled for tt and breast lift Jan 25th. my port is noticable. I can feel it very close to skin- how did the port deal with the tightening of the muscles with TT? any special procedures or anything? did it move? Did you have the pain med bag thing in? or oral pain meds? I am working with stregnth trainer on legs and arms do you find that your legs so more work? I was told you dont stand up straight for 3-4 weeks to keep muscles tight, is that true? My surgeon is very good and highly recommended by 3 docs- but the port makes me nervous- is it even that close to things moved by the TT? Thanks for the help-

I jsut read your original post and skipped ahead to reply. No, two wrongs dont make a right, however, when a "bully" is not confronted they continue to harrass that child and others. Personal experience, my oldest daughter when in 6th grade, was harassed and cried every day for months we talked to teachers, parents, principal even the child nothing- " he has issues" I was told then one day she came home crying again, I told her to defend herself no one else will- he called her a "pu--y" and she punched him in front of his friends, when the school called I told them I would come pick her up and take her to lunch because she finally stood up for herself and protected herself when the school failed to. The parents wanted me to replace the torn shirt- huh they can pay for counseling when told what their child said (by me in group of educators) they were shocked and embarrassed. an apology followed from the child and he said he would leave her alone. Some parents are blind or dont care and if thats the case principal or teacher calling does nothing. sometimes kids need to take care of themselves. Those kids went to school together until 9th grade and that day in 6th was never a problem again. second note, at this time, due to school bully, my friends 6th grade daughter is not eating- yep, he said she didn't need to get dressed cute cuz shes too fat anyway- so not eating been to hospital, dr, and refusses to eat- my son now 18 and the "stud" of the high school got involved- he went to school for a week and took this girl to lunch- sat with her friends and acted like her"friend" when the bully wanted to hang out with other kids- Paul told him to be cool and he could- if he wanted to be a jerk- get lost! This kid was so impressed that Tayla knew the flag football coach and popular kid from highschool that he is very nice to her now- but too late, she is already not eating and words cannot be taken back. Kids are cruel it is a learning experience sure- but my stand is that we are here to protect our kids thats our job- no one loves our kids like we do so Paula, stay involved ask daily how the situation is encourage other parents with problems with this kid to speak up- numbers talk- the educator has to listen and cowboy up to a group of parents faster that one. Does the school have a psychologist on staff? Suggest that route if it happens again. Good luck- glad those days are gone, youngest graduates this year other issues ahead.

Ok so all my praise of the great Dr. Hennessey as kick me in the ass, called to schd a fill today and as of Monday yes, 3 days ago, he just left the clinic- gone no forward or patients no info NOTHING- what a jerk, went to his house, yeah, kinda bold but hey- all he "lifetime" lecture crap, he could have given me the info he was leaving so I would know where to go. The great falls clinic is referring to a Dr. Lucas or Roher- so I will contact them luckily the original nurse that did my office visits now works for Lucas so she will call tomarrow with the scoop and what to do. So question- I live in a very small town, and know Dr. H's wife and family and where he lives, is it way too bold to just show up, knock at the door and say "what the hell...." or just wait for the clinic to get things straight? there are no docs who have been doing the fills so it will be starting all over with a new needle poker- damn dont want to be a ginnie bpig again. - anyway had to vent, sorry MT patients he is a good doc just looking out for #1 and our expense. this is a small town he maybe did 30-40 lap bands he could have sent letters or calls- his nurse didnt even know what the deal was. - UGH

14 months out, very happy no problems would do this again, and refer people all the time. my only regret is that I spent 35 years fighting to be less obese because I never thought I would be out of the "obese" area on weight charts.- oh yeah, the clothes, I do regret paying big bucks for fat chick clothes that were heavy as hell carring down the stairs to the car and donated. but dang it fun shopping now. size 12 or 14 in JR. dept.!!

Just spoke with Mary, Dr. hennesseys nurse. "because of his malpractice insurance, they are no longer allowing him to fill mx bands" As far as surgeon and placing the band, I am very happy with my results. start to finish. He is very personal yet very adimit that the band is a tool and if you want a "free ride" this is not the ticket. He keeps on my ass, if I miss too many months of checking in Mary calls or emails to see where I am at and to check in. check in is a weigh in and thats it no $$$ no big deal just to keep me honest with the scale. As far as experience, I was Dr. Hennesseys first lap band patient. selfish on my part, I wanted the Inamed referrred Dr. there to make sure things went right. I have had no problems! none. my scars are great he even lined the port scare (largest one) up with my gall bladder scare so it looks the same only cleaner. Had to check out my tummy to see if I could see the others, they are there about the size of my pointer finger long and a pencil line thick. so great in my opinion. I have referred 2 friends to him, and they are doing great not loosing as fast as theyd like but "its a tool" If money is a problem and you arent prepare to pay for the possibles than you may no like him. He doesnt "wait for money" for example I was not loosing and all the experiences of errosion on the site I questioned the possibility that was a tuesday, monday of next week I was in for the down the throat test- I took that as he was cautions of my health and wanted an answer NOW better that when I had the cash- I am a cash pay too) Thank gosh for payments! I could go on and on. He has had changes in his staff the last 6 months so things are getting more organized and familiar with the rules of malpractice insurance for this surgery. If you have any questions directly about him let me know there are a few of us here in Lewistown that have experience. PS Mary says she heard a Dr. in Kalispell was doing mx band fills??? didnt know name of anything but is she hears will keep me posted.

It's been a long time since Ive posted, and my weight loss ticker is not up to date but it's close enough. As of last night July 4- 1 year 2 months being banded I have lost 93 lbs and over 60 inches total. I feel great. I haven't gotten a fill for 3 months or so and I still feel restriction. I have change alot, mostly the small stuff like parking at the door, now I park and walk, or just walk if it is within shorter distance. I live in a small town so Mostly walk. I started doing foster care for a 1 month old in April, he is now 4 months and doing well, he is suffering the consiquesces of a drug addict mother but, he is getting along so my exercise time is limited. I try to walk with him in striller as much as possible. the last 3 months only lost 3.5 lbs, didnt think I would slow down this much but atleast its a loss. I wear size 12 misses or 14/16 jrs. my teenage daughter thinks I need to stay in the jr department, however, the low waist pants drive me crazy, but hay better than a year ago. Hope everyone is doing great!

actually, there is a band dr. here in Montana, we are growing in soo many ways paved roads, phones, electricity and yes a lap band dr. he did my band a year ago May and he is great very personal. His main practice is in Great Falls he does travel to Lewistown 2 days per week. about 7 hrs or so from Kalispell or Big scare airlines might travel- anyway heres his info. Dr. Steven Hennessey Great Falls Clinic 406-7713400 1-800-421-1649 he will do mexican dr fills as far as I know. good luck

Dreaming is great, but keep reality in mind. I am 1 year out, I am 3 lbs from my original goal, and considering setting another goal about 30 lbs less, HOWEVER I feel great now, I look good and am happy with where I am in my skin. That is what you need to focus on feeling good in your skin not a size or a pound amount. What I weighed to wear a size 12 when I was 20 is alot less than now at 38 and 3 kids later. Just have fun, celebrate the victories, breathing easier, smaller clothes, self esteem. Best of luck!!