ezbeinggreen

December 7th and enjoying my pre-op liquid diet now (not!).

@@CowgirlJane i am sorry if you thought I implied you were intending to keep things casual. I thought it was clear from your post that you want the exact opposite. I just meant that as a generalization for anyone who may be reading this thread and struggling with the new attention. If the question as to whether or not the pulling your hair thing was weird - YES. That is way to intimate for a first date, and kind of strange in general. It sounds like this guy could be just a "dog" as they say. In my 30s I met a guy on match.com, we had a great first date and he too was forward and asked if I wanted to come back to his place that same night. I said no, and he was like OK no worries, I still want to see you again anyway. We ended up dating for 3 months before he finally got around to telling me he had no interest in being in a serious/exclusive relationship. Of course that was after our relationship had become sexual, which I think was a really crappy thing for him to do. Lesson learned on my part.

Hey CowGirlJane - I have been in a similar dating place as you, still pretty much am. I am 44 and single, never married. Close a few times but no cigar. Around 2009 when I hit the peak of my weight loss with the Band (now gone), I was suddenly attracting a lot more male attention, some of it way too aggressive like you mention above and most of it was unwanted. I think it was timing - i was meeting a lot of men going through their midlife crisis and worse, was hit on by a lot of married men - even the husbands of friends! It sucked, to say the least and really turned me off from marriage and dating all together. I think for a lot of us women after significant weight loss, we are experiencing this kind of attention for the first time and it is uncomfortable. Women who never struggled with their weight and who are reasonably attractive have had to deal with this stuff their entire lives, so I think they have just gotten used to it. Years ago, I had this one friend who was the cutest thing you'd ever seen - petite, great figure (dressed conservatively), pretty and smart, funny - men would trip over themselves around her all the time. She never seemed to notice, she was numb to it. i think it is because she has to deal with it her entire life, she just had blinders on and never even reacted to any of it. The difference between us and her is that she has had her entire life to develop her coping mechanism for this type of attention. I know the psychologist in my Band program warned us about this, so I wouldn't beat yourself up about it or get too discouraged. All you can do is remain strong, stick to your convictions (what ever they are), and keep your safety in mind. if you want to hook up with this guy, go for it - that's your business. If you aren't ready but like spending time with him, tell him that. If he is a jerk about it, he wasn't worth your time in the first place. Or don't say anything and just make sure you stay in public places and don't put yourself in a compromising position. The point is you don't owe this guy anything. I know it is hard to get out of what I like to call the "fat girl" mindset - being insecure because of your body so you worry too much about what everyone else thinks, wanting people to like you, focusing on pleasing them vs yourself because you want them to accept you, yada yada - but you aren't her anymore. You are a hot piece of a-- he needs to work for now. LOL. I am just kidding but you get my drift. It's all about you now, who cares what he wants or thinks. :-)

Oooh I am very curious as to how these are. Keep us posted! You know me, I can be a bit of a hippy tree-hugger sometimes and would prefer an all-natural Protein supplement. Plus I don't do artificial sweeteners. I will reluctantly drink the whey isolates out of taste/need but prefer vegan drinks when I can find tolerable ones.

I am not sure why the URL didn't post. Trying again here http://cuttingthefatwithaknife.blogspot.com/2014_10_01_archive.html

Hi Nibbler, I have a friend who had Sleeve surgery back in Dec (he has lost over 100 pounds already) and he taste-tested a bunch of Protein drinks and shakes, video reviews are on his blog http://cuttingthefatwithaknife.blogspot.com/2014_10_01_archive.html%C2'> He is also on here @@Stevehud

Am I the only one who thinks it's kind of unnatural to have to rely so much on Protein supplements? I am starting to wonder about the long-term effects of this and all the artificial sweeteners in the sugar-free products they want us to use. What's the point of losing 100 pounds if I am going to die of cancer in 10 years from all the aspartame. Sorry, rant over.

I know some people can convert from band to something else in one surgical procedure, but i would be cautious about a single procedure after band erosion. Erosion is basically the band growing into your stomach, it is eroding through the stomach wall, basically eating it away. So there must be some damage done (the stomach does heal quickly though). Once the surgeon removes the band, that area may be too weak for another procedure right away - I guess it will depend on how much damage the surgeon finds once he removes the band. Hopefully it's minimal in your case and you can do it all in one shot! I think this is why most surgeons prefer RnY over VSG after band erosion - the bypass does not occur anywhere near the area damaged by the band. I'm fine now, no complications once the band came out except I regained ALL the weight I lost. Since it has been 4 years, I am hoping my stomach is healthy enough for VSG vs RnY. RnY still scares me a bit. I have a friend 10 years out dealing with major Vitamin deficiences (she has to get Iron infusions now). During one of the info sessions I attended, a woman was trying to get her RnY reversed because of the same problems. I have a consult with a new surgeon on 8/12. Good luck - let us know what your doc says!

I think my biggest peeve when I was banded was servers trying to rush me. It would take me forever to eat a small amount of food and it felt like every 5 mins they would show up asking "are you sure it's okay?" Or "do you want me to pack the rest to go for you?" No, I'm not done and I just eat slow. Go away. So concerned with turning over the table. I was conscious of it and always tipped well and accordingly. Drinks - I would just order water and not touch it. I had a banded friend who would do the same but put salt in her water so she wasn't tempted to drink it.

I hate to be the one to tell you this but if you have band erosion, your band will have to come out and you won't be able to get another one. I strongly suggest taking it out sooner rather than later before it causes any more damage. It won't stop eroding and will only get worse. Your surgeon will likely advise you to wait at least 6 months for your stomach to heal - depends on the damage done - before getting a revision to RNY or VSG, or try to go it on your own. My surgeon made me wait a year and by then my insurance no longer covered any bariatrics. I was banded in Oct 2007 and my band had completely eroded into my stomach by year 4. It was removed Sep 2011. My surgeon suspected erosion year 2 but took a wait and see approach. 2 years later I ended up in the hospital for 10 days and nearly died. By then the band had completely eroded into my stomach. There are a few reasons why erosion happens but most of the time, it's nothing you did wrong. Your body is likely rejecting the foreign object in your body. They say it happens in 2% of band patients but I think that statistic is old and a lot higher now.

@@LipstickLady Way to go! You look fantastic. Very inspiring, thank you for sharing!

@@josiek1988 In my case, I didn't have "classic" symptoms like slippage or an infection at the port site. The first sign I had was a return of my acid reflux. I had it before banding and it went away for about 2 years but then it came back. That happens to a lot of folks so no one seemed concerned. The second symptom (which no one thought was band-related at the time) was a horrible sharp pain that started in my side and radiated to my back. It would last about 3-4 days, then go away for a few weeks, then come back. Everyone thought it was muscular but I knew it wasn't, it was deeper and it was debilitating - it hurt to do anything active (I could no longer run), heck even going over a bump in the road while driving caused agony. I had every test known to man -xray, CAT scan, MRI, dye tests, endoscopy, colonoscopy - you name it. Nothing. I think they started to think it was psycho-somatic. FInally during a barium swallow my surgeon saw a small pocket of air but said it was nothing to be concerned with and couldn't be causing the pain. Eventually I just stopped complaining about it and it lessened over time. I kept getting band fills and would feel restriction on some days but others I could eat anything without issue. I slowly started regain weight - I assumed it was because I couldn't work out. Then one weekend I came down with a high fever and what I thought was the flu and ended up in the hospital for 10 days. Whatever infection I had made me septic, my kidneys had shut down. I got so dehydrated I ended up with a bowel obstruction and that is really what kept me in the hospital for so long, waiting for that to clear up. While I was there more tests showed my band had completely eroded into my stomach. The reason I was feeling restriction sometimes was that not only had my band eroded, but my stomach actually birfucated and grew around the band so the food had two paths to go down, one banded and one not. I am convinced that mysterious infection was either caused by the eroded band or my immune system had been so weakened by it, I couldn't fight strep or whatever it was I had (they never figured it out). Long story short, symptoms may seem unrelated because pain may manifest in other areas, or because of secondary infections. If you feel anything abnormal a simple swallow study and an upper GI can help determine if the band has slipped or is eroding. it is a foreign object and erosion is often caused by your body trying to reject it.

And @@Shakti I am so happy for you, and even a little jealous that you are getting it done in just a few weeks by Dr. Floch. They really do have the best reputation in CT. Good luck and keep us all posted!!!

Don't beat yourself up or feel you have to justify your decision. I did that to myself for a long time. It took me years to accept I wasn't taking the "easy way" out. Ask anyone here, there is nothing easy about surgical weight loss. Your head issues do not magically go away. I beat myself up for years for not having the willpower and self-control to do it on my own. But it is so much more than that. Of course, if we could lose the weight on our own we would! If it was easy, WLS surgery wouldn't even exist. But it is not and if you are anything like me, you struggled most of your adult life with weight issues. Heck who am i kidding - I was chubby kid as well. It was not an easy decision for me either. I was 36 when I had my first procedure done. I had a BMI of 38 and co-morbities (High Blood Pressure, sleep Apnea, pre-Diabetic). After I lost the weight everything went away, except the HBP but my medication was significantly reduced. But when the band came out, I regained all the weight in less than 2 years. Now at 44 I have what they collectively call metabolic syndrome (it's a group of conditions all at once - high blood pressure, high blood sugar, high cholesterol, etc.). I was diagnosed with type 2 Diabetes earlier this year. So I am doing this again because I know I can't do it on my own. I have too many issues with food and the only thing that ever worked for me was restriction. I know firsthand surgery worked for me. I don't want a heart attack like my mother had at 49. I don't want to live a miserable, sedentary short life. I too feel the cost of the surgery is an investment in me, and I am worth it! We are worth it!

Hi Dub - I didn't have my before and after posted because even though I was successful at losing the weight with the Lap Band, I had to have it removed due to erosion. It's now 4 years later and I have regained most of the weight. I am working on getting revision to VSG later this year. But I keep this picture around for inspiration - I WILL get there again!

Hi Shakti - I grew up in Ffld Cty but I live in the New Haven area now. Who is your surgeon? I was looking at getting my surgery through Fairfield County Bariatrics - Dr. Neil Floch. I met with him 2 years ago in his Norwalk and Fairfield offices and really liked him. But a few months later I got laid off and of course, insurance wouldn't cover it. When I started my new job last year, my new employer's plan wouldn't cover any WLS at all. Frustrating to say the least. So I explored self-pay but the prices are outrageous in CT and it's the hospital, not the surgeon, driving up the cost. The office manager sent me the breakdown - the surgeon's fee was $6000, anesthesia $1800, and the hospitals wanted $15000 - 17000 (Dr. Floch performs surgery out of Norwalk, Griffin, and Bridgeport Hospital). Oh and the hospital wants a one-time cash payment, no financing. I don't have $25,000 - 30,000 just sitting around so I am exploring having the surgery done out of state. My parents live in FL and I can get sleeved there for $10K - $15K all inclusive. It's certainly easier to finance $10K vs $25K! Hopefullly your insurance plan covers WLS!

I had my band from 2007 - 2011 (it worked for me until it eroded and had to be removed). I am looking at converting to a sleeve now as well. Obviously I can't give you any insight to the sleeve yet but I can tell you that the first year I had my band, I didn't lose that much weight either. However year 2 was when the weight really came off of me. How many adjustments/fills have you had so far? I had a 4cc band and I didn't start to really lose weight until my band was at least 1/2 full and felt real restriction. My program was really conservative and I must have had 5-10 fills before I reached that point. But once I got to the point where I could only get in about 800-1000 calories a day (liquids, soft foods), the weight came off my rapidly. The band loosens as you lose weight and lose fat around your stomach, so eventually you can eat more and need to get another fill to keep that restriction. I went every 1-2 months for a fill. I lost about 50% of the weight I needed to lose with the band alone and light exercise (walking a few times a week). The rest of the weight melted off of me once I started working out more regularly and heavily (I started running instead of walking 5 x week, added yoga and pilates into the mix). I plateaued with the band when I had the last 20 pounds to lose. I am 5'3" and was 220 lbs (size 18-20) when I was first banded and the lowest I ever got was 2.5 years out at 145 lbs (size 6-8). As well as the Lap band worked for me (until it didn't), going through erosion was hell. My body just did not want a foreign object inside of me and rejected the band. Unfortunately VSG was not an option yet when I was banded, but if given the choice I would have opted for the sleeve over the band for sure.

Thank you @@eisorp I am glad to hear there is an insurance option. I am trying to schedule a consult with Dr Wizman as well and then I will decide between the two, both have excellent reputations!

Agreed, I was hoping his office offers BLIS but I don't think they do. :-(

ttdish - did you ask him outright what happens if there is a complication, how it is handled? A leak may have never happened to one of his patients yet, but the reality is they do happen 2% of the time. Statistically it is only a matter of time. And with my luck, it will be me. I was given those same odds for band erosion and guess what? I was that 2%. So I know complications can and do happen, regardless of how well the surgeon's track record is. I would definitely get a solid answer from him before you have surgery, I plan to. If he can't give me a straight answer and guarantee I will be covered, I will have to find someone else who can.

He really is a great surgeon and good person. His office staff bends over backwards to help you. I know of at least 5 others who had used him and we all had easy recoveries. One person flew in from another state. You can google him. Good luck with your search! Hi Beach Lover, I know this thread is fairly old so hoping you are still around. I have a consult scheduled with Dr Shillingford on 8/12. I am also self-pay and out of state (my parents live in So. Florida though). Any issues or concerns with after care as a self-pay? I am worried about any complications that could arise. The all-inclusive package covers for 1 year post op, I believe. But not sure that covers a complication like leakage? I am just worried about any subsequent surgeries to correct anything, how is that paid for? If there is a leak per se, I don't think I could afford to pay for a second surgery. :-(

I was very happy with Dr. Nepomnayshy. He did my Lap Band in 2007 and also the removal in 2011 when it eroded. Actually before we knew for sure it had eroded, I was rushed to South Shore Hospital (I lived in Quincy at the time) with a mysterious illness (high fever, flu like symptoms) - my kidneys shut down and I was septic. I was in the ICU for 4 days, ended up dehydrated and with a bowel obstruction that they did nothing about. The staff at South Shore Hospital were afraid to give me an NG tube because I was banded, and let me suffer for 2 more days. We called Dr. Nepomnayshy's team at Lahey Clinic and within 30 minutes I was being transferred by ambulance to Lahey Clinic in Burlington. Once in Dr. Nepomnayshy's hands I immediately improved. I am convinced SSH would have killed me. During that stay further tests revealed the band had completely eroded into my stomach and had to be removed. I was devasted that it had to come out because I had done so well on it until then. At the time, I was supposedly only Lahey's second patient to ever experience band erosion (I wonder how that number has changed since!). Dr. Nepomnayshy would not do a revision on me for at least 6-12 months, until my stomach completely healed. At the time I was a wreck, but now I appreciate his caution. If I did end up needing a revision, he wanted to do RNY over VSG (which I preferred) - I think there was some concern about weakening of the stomach wall from the band. By the time I had healed, my employer changed insurance plans and WLS was no longer covered so a 2nd surgery was out of the question. But I would have gone back to him without hesitation. If your insurance covers WLS, Lahey Clinic has a great bariatric program, with lots of support. They were a Center of Excellence before most of the others in MA. I don't know if nurse Pam is still there, but she was wonderful. If I wasn't self-pay, I would go back to Lahey. Unfortunately self-pay for bariatrics in the Northeast is ridiculously expensive.

Hi - I have my initial consult with Dr. Shillingford on 8/12! I too am self-pay. I had the Lap Band removed due to erosion back in 2011 and by the time I was ready to do a revision, my employer changed insurance plans and WLS was no longer covered. I decided to wait, I was looking for a new job and wanted to believe I could keep the weight off on my own. Fast forward a few years (and after regaining all the weight) my new employer's plan also does not cover WLS so I started looking at self-pay options. I live in CT now and the cost of self-pay for VSG is $25,000 - 30,000 depending on the hospital your surgeon performs the surgery at. There is no way I could pay $30K out of pocket so I gave up for a while. I looked at Mexico for $5 - 6K but the lack of after care concerns me. For some reason I never considered FL until now - I am self-pay I can go anywhere! My parents live in S. Florida so I can stay with them for an extended period while doing pre-op tests and post op recovery (I am in sales and am home-office based so working from my parents' home is no issue). So my question for those of you self-paying with Dr. Wizman or Dr Shillingford - are you at all concerned about post op care if there is a complication? I have noticed on other surgeon sites that they participate in BLIS (Bundled Loan and Indemnity Soultion)- it helps protect you should you need secondary surgeries from a complication. I don't see anything like that on Dr Shillingford's site. I know I personally cannot afford to pay for additional surgeries should something go wrong. Is this covered in the "all inclusive" package? Seems to good to be true for only $10 - 11K. I know most complications from sleeve arise in the first 30 days (leakage is the primary problem) but are you at all concerned about how you will deal with any issues that arise later on?