2008er

There are a BUNCH of us! This is gonna be fun! As for the quitting smoking, that's one thing I haven't had a problem w/in the past. I started smoking at age 14, and have picked it up and put it down a few different times. Cigs never caused a physical craving for me - just the mental part of wanting to do it, or the social aspect of smoking in bars, etc. This past time I've been smoking about a year, but never on weekends at home (hubby doesn't know, or at least doesn't say anything). I guess that's how Mother Nature dealt it to me...no cig cravings, but just ask me someday about the year I gave up chocolate for Lent - my coworkers wanted to put "caution" tape around my cube at work!!!! Anyway, I thought I'd better quit now so I can get my lung capacity back up pre-op. Plus, deep breathing really helps a lot when stopping smoking, since you get that nice "drag" feeling going to replace the cigs. I'm so excited about taking this big band-step forward in my life...I feel like I could conquer the world right now. :cool:

Whoo-hoo! Got my date today - Feb 26! I'm thrilled. I start the pre-op diet (medifast) on Monday 01/21 (ugh - a whole MONTH...ah well, better to get started as soon as possible, eh?). Stopped smoking today in prep as well. I can't wait!!!!!!!

I cannot even come up with words to describe how thrilled I am. I've been working on approval since June/July. I was denied twice, and had a hearing scheduled this coming Monday to argue my case. When they sent me the hearing date, they also sent the case file and said I could send in addt'l info that I wanted included. i wrote a letter and provided my family history this past Monday. Today I got the call that they re-reviewed it and approved me! I am on top of the world!!!!!!!!!! In June I had a BMI of 36. By Oct is was 38, and crept to 39 by Christmas. I let them know in the letter that I'm only 6obs away from a BMI of 40 (where they'd approve me even w/o all the comorbidities), and it seems a travesty for me to have to get sicker before getting healthy. Apparently, logic prevailed and they agreed. Halleluah!!!!! I want to "high five" the world!!!

I'm right here with you, sista. I have had similar convos w/my dh over the past several years. It blew my mind that he could be so unbelievably superficial and hurtful. He also said he was les interested in me because my self esteem had eroded and that made me less attractive...really? I wonder why my self esteem was low? Maybe because he was constantly chipping away at it and I was self conscious about everything I ate and how the light reflected off my fat rolls? Geeeeeez. Anyway, suffice it to say I hear you and sympathize. My DH and I had a big ass (pun intended) blow out last week - he was treating me disrespectfully on vacation, and I had enough. I, too, wrote him a letter in response (I get too distracted trying to make my point verbally when I'm that pissed off). I made it clear that he does not get to be with me and be that disrespectful. I expect to be treated with love and respect. I expect him to take the time and effort to be aware of my bneeds and respond to them as a loving partner. I expect him to show up in the relationship and be the man I deserve. I asked "Would you rather have a fat wife that loves you or a thin wife that can't stand to be in the same room with you?" Yes, I intend to be thin and healthy, but it's not like I have a magic wand. I didn't get fat overnight, and I won't get thin overnight either. However, I'm not sure I can EVER be healthy with a partner that only acknowledges my shortcomings and doesn't celebrate the postivies that I bring to the relationship. It worked quite well. I think I finally helped him see that his actions were selfish. Just like you, I don't "perform" because he works on his body. It's nice and all, but even when he was overweight I still was a full wife to him. Does him being in shape make the experience more enjoyable? yes (at least when I can concentrate on him and not be distracted by whether MY body looks ok just then - ugh). However, like you, that is not he REASON I do it. I do it because I want to please him. In a loving, reciprocal relationship, I would expect that he'd also want to please ME, and if he's not sure what that means after 18 years, he might want to do a little research and ask. Maybe it would help to talk to your dh about what your expectations are in a relationship in general - make it less HIM and more about what a good relationship looks like to you. He may feel less attacked, and therefore less defensive and assy (I know "assy" isn't a word, but it seems right here). I would definitely pursue this tactic before considering leaving AND before considering just sweeping it under as a single event. You don't want to let something like this go unaddressed, or you send the message that it's ok to treat you like that. It's not. Sometimes it also works (especially since he sounds like a good dad) if he'd encourage his son to treat a wife like he's treating you. What if you are preggers and it's a girl? Would it be ok with him if his daughter's significant other said things like that to her? If not, then why does he think it's ok to treat YOU like that and model that behavior? he needs to BE the man he wants his son to be and be a model for the kind of man he'd want his daughter to marry. I wish you well, and I'm glad you posted this. I fully understand that this was a vent and that he's not like this all the time, but it's a great opportunity to have a deeper conversation about it so it doesn't become a systemic problem. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!

Margie, Hon, I'm right here with ya. I don't have UHC, but CDPHP in NY is kinda the same. I'm in your boat - been denied, appealed, and appeal was denied. I'm on second level appeal and just emailed Obesity Advocacy this morning. I do hope they can help me, too. I'll be here cheering you on and hoping for a similar outcome. Keep fighting the good fight!

I'm so bummed...my ins is still denied. I got the initial denail on 10/19 and started the appeals process right away that night by phone. The ins rep I talked to said he could take my verbal and send me a packet of info to file the rest as written. Unfortunately (VERY), he "accidentally" submitted it as complete, so it was denied AGAIN on 10/26. I about flipped out when the surgeon's office called and told me. I mean, how can it be denied when I haven't filed yet? SO - yesterday I got back on the phone with the ins co and raised a little heck. They won't re-open it, but told me to file a second-level appeal. I'm in process of doing so, and I'm enlisting the help of obestity adovcates in CA to see if they'll be able to help. It's expensive ($500-1000), but still way cheaper than self-pay, so worth a try. I'm sooooo nervous that I'll be denied again and SOL. Please think happy thoughts for me! of course, the stress is building, so I'm eating more, so maybe I'll cross into 40 BMI after all - but UGH I don't want to go there!!!!!!!!!!

Super bummer. I knew all along that ins denial was a possibility (my BMI is 38), but I really, really thoght my comorbidities would be enough. GERD, hypoglycemia, hypopnea,high cholesterol, joint pain, shortness of breath, depression, plantar fascitis, sciatica, plenty of weight loss attempt efforts documented (meridia, xenical, nutrisystem, et al). And yet...nope. I'm not completely giving up - I filed an appeal on Friday - but it's just SUCH a bummer. i've been SOOOOOOOO looking forward to this. I even had a date of 12/31. I feel like someone kicked me in my ample, fluffy belly. :cry Any words of advice or encouragement? IWANNABEALAPBANDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Waah!

I'm in the Saratoga area - upstate, but still kinda far from you guys...

Greetings, fellow Merriers! I'm still in pre-approval stage (my surgeon doesn't submit for ins approval until ALL pre-op testing is complete), but I did get a date yesterday when I went for my consult. Dec 31! (can't really push it much farter than that and maintain the 2007 inpatient co-pays - they double on Jan 1 from $240 to $500!). I told DH today, and he's bummed it's on a holiday, but personally I'm thrilled. I'd do it today if I could, regardless of the upcoming holidays. I know what turkey tastes like already! ha! I already did my sleep study (no apnea - just hypoxia - apparently that means that they've confirmed I sleep like sh*t but can't give me a CPAP to help. ugh. But at least that test is out of the way. Still have nutritionist, psych (although they're checking if my regular therapist is good enough), GI and the zillion xrays yadda yadda. I'm hopeful we can get all this done and cruise right along. Got all the blood taken yesterday, too - LOTS of vials. Freaked me out a little! Aneeway, I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited to have a date to look forward to - I'm ready to start this new life. Now that I have an "official" weight recorded, I can start working to lose a little prior to surgery and start exercizing as well (I am a low BMI-er and worried about dropping below 35 and getting denied due to that). I'm sure both factors will help my sleeping, too. I hope you're all doing well - I'm thinking about writiing a little theme song for us to the tune of a carol or something. I'll let you know what I come up with. Right now, all I have is "Lap-band-ers, Lap-band-ers, chewing all the way!" to the tune of jingle bells. I'm SURE we can do better - ha!

...ya chewe it long enough, that half lobster is going to feel like a whole buffet! Just remember "all you can eat" means just that...all YOU can eat. It just may be significantly less than your dining partners, but you'll still be able to eat to satisfaction... :eek: Enjoy your vacay!!!!

Greetings, all! I'm still in pre-approval land (done the seminar, sleep study, first surgical consult next week), and before I go to the consult I'd be interested in your experience with pre-op dieting... My surgeon, at the seminar, mentioned that his team requires everyone to lose 10% body weight prior to surgery. If I did that, I'd be under the 35 minimum BMI for ins approval (I'm 5'8", 241 lbs...230 is about as low as I can go and still be over 35 BMI). Anyone have experience with a dr that had this kind of threshold for his patients? Were you, as a low BMI-er, also required to lose prior to surgery, or were you exempt? I'd like to start exercising and getting ready for op day now, but I'm very concerned about losing too much (losing has never been my prob - it's the keeping it off part that messes with me!). Thanks for your input!

I'll start with the one that came to mind while I was reading what you all have shared here. My mortification comes not just from what this ex-BF said, but how I reacted to it at the time...I'm completely without-a-doubt absolutely sure that dating this guy helped kick me into years of eating disorders... When I was in 9th grade I was an exchange student and gained a bunch of weight. I'm 5'8", but had always been on the thinner (but busty) side (man, if only I could have appreciated that at the time!!), but by the time I came home from my year away I weighed 174 (my mother was mortified, as she was getting married a couple days after my return and had to have my bridemaid dress let out). I dieted and exercised down to 132. I looked FANTASTIC. I had a BF who was super-skinny. One day he was "complimenting" me on my hard body, and said, "I want you to lose just 3 more pounds - I want to be able to tell people my GF weighs less than 130." UN-FREAKIN'-BELIEVABLE. He just wanted something to brag about. What-ever. But what's worse? My reaction. I AGREEED to it, and worked my b*tt off to try and accomplish it. When I just couldn't (132 was as low as I was gonna go , I was completely devastated and cried and cried for weeks - months maybe. I then proceeded to yo-yo between 132-150 for a few years, then 185-230. Gawd. It SO sucks what we let people do to us mentally. I finally broke up with him, but not for another year. Just one of those MANY times I wish I could time travel and tell my younger self how to respond to someone!!!! ~kat

My doc did say no Advil ever again. He said it's more likely to cause ulcerations than Tylenol, so it's a no-no after banding, period. This is just MY dr, though - best to check with yours. Hope that helps! ~kat

I have a Tanita body fat monitor (digital) and I love it (although I don't always love what it tells me). I like that it also can show muscle weight and bone weight. I'll be even happier when I start moving away from the 50% fat mark! It's always been pretty on par w/my Dr office's scale (balance beam type). I like it because of the accuracy, features, and it's cool looking (glass and steel). ~kat

I waffle (and wrestle) with the same thoughts. If I'm so d@mned competent in everything else, why can't I get a grip on something and mathematically simple as calories in vs. calories out?? And yet, here I am as well. It's like the serenity prayer - we need to work very, very hard to accept those things we cannot change, and we have to work even harder to identify them. I felt the same way before I decided to pursue psychotherapy. I knew I was "broken" but thought I "should" be able to fix myself. No go. Life is SO much better once I came to grips with the fact that TRULY smart people know when to ask for help, and where to get it. Hey, even Albert Einstein didn't know his own phone number...he just knew where to look it up.

Ok, so I hope this doesn't come up when I do my psych eval, but I feel like I just got the best news yesterday - I went to a sleep disorder Dr. and he pre-diagnosed me with sleep apnea. It was all I could do to hold back a big, beaming smile! He has to do the definitive sleep study test, but he was pretty sure I have it. So why am I happy to be diagnosed with something so serious? I'm a low BMI-er (36 right now) and I'vve been sooo nervous about not being approved. My ins co will, however, approve me if I have sleep apnea. There is some seriously messed up psychological stuff that goes with this banding thing...yowza. Very strange, but real. I'm reading all these threads about being afraid to be thin, concern about not eating more of the foods that are currently killing us, all kinds of stuff (and I'm there with y'all - we have a nice roomy boat here). And now this. I feel a little nuts (well chewwed, of course!), but I guess that's just the path. I need to accept my feelings and reactions as they are, and not try to judge them. I think that'll be a big step toward recovery for me anyway, since I'll not have food to psh those "unacceptable" reactions and feelings down once I get banded... Sorry for the ramble - just had to get it out. ~kat

Nope, no surgery date yet - I went to the mandatory orientation last week, and I checked w/my ins to make sure I could be covered (I can, but need co-morbidities). My ins requires a PC dr referral, and I have that for both the surgeon and the sleep apnea study (I, too, pursued the sleep thing before getting official approval - I'm anxious to get going and figured they'd put me through it anyway - no time like the present). My surgeon's office should be calling today to set up my surgical consult appt, which I have to do prior to doing the psych and nutritionist. I'm hoping the psych is just a cursory thing, since my regular therapist supports my decision and is ready to recommend me (but I know the surgeon likes his own folks) - I'm hoping my therapist can just chat with their psychologist and make nice to save me some time (wishful thinking) I'm bummed I have to sit through the nutritionist, too, since I (and I'm sure many here feel the same way) feel like I could WRITE a book on nutrition...I just have trouble, you know, following the rules i'm so so SO ready to rock and roll with this. I already picked a surgery date of 11/26 (NOT that I've been asked or have any idea if that's realistic, but it works with my schedule, don't you know...). I flip-flop between "hey, I've been fat for years, a few more months won't hurt me" and "LET'S GO!!!!! Not even ONE MORE DAY of this!!!". yeah, I think I need to do some "head work" as they say... ~kat

I feel your pain, and commiserate. I have not yet started my pre-op, but dread the day. The support here is great, though, eh? Aside: Boo Boo, you look SMOKIN' and at least 10-15 years younger, you sexy thang! You GO!!!!:clap2: Love the new pics. ~kat

This concerns me, too. My BMI is 36-37, but I've been trying to practice new eating habits and dropped some so now I'm barely hanging on to the 36. I'm very concerned that I'll lose too much and drop below 35 and have no chance in h*ll of being approved (I'm worried enough about being under 40, but I *think* I have enough co-morbidities to gain approval in spite of that). It sounds absolutely insane to want to maintain or gain weight when I'm trying so hard (and will to be implanted!!) to get to a healthy weight, but I'm with you - I'll do what it takes. I'm hoping they do use my referral weight (which was my high one), but right now I just want to hold steady til after approval. (I'll dress heavy, too - and HAM- great suggestion!!!! I'm a sponge and can fluctuate 5-7 lbs with water weight. Never thought that would be a *good* thing! ha!) :car: ~kat

Thanks for the welcome - I feel like I've been here awhile since I'm an avid reader (I'm sure I'll have a lot more to say further down the road, but right now I'm just an info sponge). The orientation was nothing spectacular info-wise (I'm been reading A LOT on the web, here, and books...learn learn learn!), but it was quite significant from the standpoint of how I feel about things. I finally feel like I'm on the road rather than just watching everyone drive by, if that makes any sense. I feel like PART of the process rather than an observer. I did my first chunk of paperwork (I love paperwork - I know, weirdo, but I do! Makes me feel productive in this kind of situation) and now I wait for the nurse to call me to schedule my surgical consult. My biggest concern is still insurance approval with my lower BMI (right about 36 today - I've been losing some weight: 5'8" 234 down from 245). I think I have enough conditions to still warrant approval (GERD, painful knee/hip issues, sleep issues that I'm being evaluated on next week), but that's one thing that makes me nervous. I hope I have the consult soon - I don't want to lose any more weight and risk going under 35 BMI and find out I have to wait longer until I regain - yikes. Anyway, I decided to start practicing "bandster eating" so it's a total habit by the time I need it. I just realized that I don't particularly like the fries here at my office cafeteria - chew them long enough and they're kinda gross. You guys give me a lot of hope, being a lower BMI'er. Seems like goal weight is more attainable when you start out with less to lose, so I can set my mental plan more aggressive than a 50% excess level. ~kat

Hey there - lurker here . I've been watching this thread for awhile since I fit the category and wonder so many things - you all have been a great source of info and hope. I have my orientation meeting tonight (Sept 11 - not crazy about the date, but pushing forward anyway) - I've been waiting for an orientation since June/July, so I've had plenty of time to research and build up my anticipation. My DH is going with me (a BIG step for me - all my food issues are very private for me, but I figured that's probably been part of my problem all along - time to reach out for support!). I hope you all are doing well - I'm thrilled to be on this journey with you!!!! :whoo: ~kat

Good morning all! I haven't seen this addressed here (please redirect me if already discussed...): I am allergic to re-absorbable sutures. Twice I've had them and they caused major complications. Any idea if this may lead to complications w/the band? I am not yet banded (still pursuing it through the forest of process obstacles!), and I wonder if this is a show-stopper for me and I need to pursue some alternative. I don't know what those sutures are made of, nor the band itself. I'm sure the surgeon can use regular sutures for my insides and the lap ports for the surgery itself, but not sure about rejecting the band. Any help/advice/direction appreciated. Thans mucho! ~kat :help:

My first experience was when I had my tonsils out at age 22. The suture site swelled up and nearly blocked my airway, the incisions split and it bled into my throat. Took me an extra month of major pain to heal...iced tea and a little cottage cheese every now and then, plus nasty liquid painkiller that burned. Ugh. The second time (when we didn't realize the tonsil complications were from the sutures) was for my...catch this and cringe!...episiotomy!!!! After my first kid, they stitched me up. Similar complications - swelling, tenderness, split incision. Couldn't sit, could hardly walk, cried constantly. Went back to the Dr a week later in agony, asking for help or even pain meds (I didn't realize that episiotomys weren't supposed to be that awful). My OBGYN was a jerk and said "hey, childbirth hurts". I went for a seond opinion and ended up in the OR that same day for a revision under general anesthesia. He's the one who let me know it was an allergic reaction and to make absolutely sure I specified any time I was going in for surgery, because there might be even bigger complications if the sutures were inside me. Ugh. What a thought!!! So, that's why I'm so concerned. If I had that serious a reaction with just a few little stiches, what could the whole band do to me if I'm allergic? ~kat:confused:

I looooove the feeling of swimming, too! Nice to have a club! I never learned how to swim properly (I just "propelled" myself through the Water - zero technique). I took a class for adult beginners last year, and it was fantastic. Could never before put my face in the water w/o holding my nose, but now I can (sure helps w/technique - imagine doing strokes w/only one arm! haaa!). I like to swim before work, too - feel like a million bucks when I'm done, quick shower, and I'm off. Since I'm still a beginner, I use fins, too. Also, being wicked out of shape amde me fatigue and suck wind something awful after each lap, so the instructor told me to alternate laps with using a floaty board (mini boogie board type thing). I started with alternating one lap and three floaty laps to build stamina. Really helped both technique and stamina, and that good ol' feeling of accompplishment. I bought a finger lap counter, too, which shows me the time it takes for each lap, avg time, etc, plus lap count. Helps w/motivation. As for hair (my big hang up - I have long hair and wanted it to stay that way, but it can't handle the daily pool abuse)...I use swimmer's shampoo (can't think of the brand offhand) to remove chlorine, plus deep conditioner. Also, I always wear a cap (keeps my hair mostly protected, plus keeps it from flinging in my face during swim time). I haven't had any problems, and I'm super picky, As for skin, my tends to dry quickly, also. I now shower daily with the Olay purple body wash - it has lots of skin conditioners in it, and works great. Also removes the chlorine smell. nice bonus. Aneeway, nice to have other swimmers out there. I tend to do other stuff during the summer, but swim indoors in the fall/winter (I wish I could ski and ice skate, but the knees aren't up to it yet - maybe post-band...). Have fun out there!!!!!! :whoo: ~kat

Hey, all! I read a lot about folks with high blood sugar who've opted for the band, but I haven't seen much from those who started out hypoglycemic like myself. Although I know my dips are easier to manage when my weight is normal, I worry about the process...if my foods are quite restricted (which I'm assuming they will be during healing, and possibly later depending on my own tolerance), will my dips be worse? Right now, when I have a big dip I can take a glucose tab and get through it. What if I can't tolerate them afterwards? I'm a little concerned here... Any comments appreciated. ~kat