Fluffnomore

I don't know RJ. I am reading all of these stories, and I don't know if we really can say with certainty that people who turn out obese or morbidly obese had experiences that made them that way. Depending on who I talk to, I either had a really wonderful childhood or a crazy one. My perspective is that it was not without its problems, but overall it was fairly normal. I have fond memories. I was not abused, but I have an alcoholic father who went to rehab when I was 9 and has stayed sober. It would be incredibly easy and not truthful to blame my adult problems on that experience. I have a superability to endure difficult situations as an adult that I can probably trace back to that time, but it is not of the same caliber in any way, shape or form, as what many of you (and my husband) endured as children. It's like I had a broken leg when I was a kid and was on crutches for a year, and I am comparing myself to someone who survived polio. Not to say that the experience wasn't bad or life changing, but it didn't affect my entire childhood. Like GG, my weight was more or less under control until my 30s. But after having children, after undergoing some tough times, and being sick, my metabolism slowed considerably as did my activity. Somewhere in the middle of this my eating habits also declined. I don't believe that this was some reaction to things that happened to me 30 years ago; more a snowball rolling down a hill and gathering more and more snow.

Interesting. I am taking my obese son in to be baseline tested for diabetes, cholesterol and the rest. I am sure that at least some of his issues lie in insulin resistance. But I don't know how to make the medical professionals (or him, for that matter) take this seriously. If I had a dollar for every time I was recommended a high carbohydrate, low-fat diet, I would be a very rich woman.

LOL. Believe me. 190 is probably what I should wait for too, and my past swings tell me I will be wearing these through the low 170s! I might go for the sausage look out of excitement though.

One of the things that struck me is that at my pre-op appointment I spent 10 minutes reading and signing 5-10 pages of paperwork that essentially said, "I understand that I could die." That means (to me) it is serious. In contrast, when I had my gallbladder out, or some female surgery…I signed the same paperwork but it was not nearly as complex or as emphasized. All that said, yes…for me it has been miracle surgery so far. There is simply nothing I could have done that would give me these results and I tried for years. Do I love it all the time? No. But even 6 weeks out I feel like the benefits are already outweighing the disadvantages. Everybody's mileage may vary on this one.

I had not thought about this. It's probably a good idea.

Ugh. I continually worry about the fact that I can easily hold more than that. I see these threads that say "You should only be able to hold 1/4 cup" and it freaks me out. I can do 1/2 cup easily (not more, but still.) Oh well. I'd be worried about something regardless.

Getting into my daughter's jeans…what an awesome problem to have. Not likely though. She inherited her dad's long, skinny legs. I have the Irish fireplug legs. I did purchase and try on two pairs of 14s in the last two weeks. I can zip them! Probably some people would even wear them like that, but I just can't do it yet. I think I'm about to crack Onederland here, and I need to be patient and try them again after I do that. Even so, they are transition jeans. I think I spent $35-40 on both together, in styles similar to what I'm wearing now. I really don't like bling on the butt, so I will watch this thread avidly to see who comes up with fancy jeans that don't have that. If such a thing exists. After that? I know it will be at least another 30 pounds before I go down another size. Sigh.

I got all giddy with moving up to purees/mushies and gleefully left the shakes for a week or so, but had one for Breakfast yesterday (Premier Protein, my favorite one.) Let me tell you, the rest of the day just fell into place nutritionally. I love changing things up with cream of wheat or eggs, but there is very little that gives you that nice hit of protein first thing in the morning and sets things up for success. I see that others are encouraged to leave off the Protein Shakes after moving finally to solids; I think I will probably use them regularly as long as I can.

This! This! My NUT was okay, but I really can't get over all of the recommendations to eat Yoplait light with sweeteners, etc. If I want yogurt I don't want to eat crap. I'd drink Crystal Light if I couldn't get the Water down any other way, but I don't want it to be an every day thing. I don't know. It is truly frustrating.

My husband's psych will occasionally find us coupons or samples when things are tight. He's on 5 meds so it gets crazy expensive. We have great insurance and still pay about $250 a month for his medication. It's ridiculous. Good luck…We're pulling for you!

And I find (though I don't match up with a lot of these symptoms, I live with two who do) that eating mindfully can easily trip over into full on obsession if one is not careful. Success to me looks like logging food but not thinking too hard about it (not trying to game the system, so to speak); planning meals but from the fuel and enjoyment sides equally; getting to exercise classes but not obsessing over how many calories I burned…and etc.

I am so thankful that I took my measurements prior to surgery. While watching the scale go down has been gratifying, I just did measurements again for the first time in 3 weeks. Since before surgery I have lost a total of 14.5 inches from everywhere…and that seems impossible. Why is this a big deal? Because I am noooooooot quite into the next size down. Don't get me wrong; I can see that I have more room in my clothing, but actually measuring is showing me how close I am to making that move. And that gives me hope and motivation! I mean, I could squeeze into the next size down but nobody needs to see that. Now I'm happy to put those jeans back in the closet and try them on again next week.

And meds compliance! Those same people go through periods where they are convinced that they can just stop their meds.

I wonder what the connection is between binge or compulsive eating and OCD. I know several people who have been diagnosed with both...

You're not alone in that, Laura. I cook for my family. I used to cook ridiculously healthy but over the years I've taken more of a "fucked it" route. We really were/are not out every night eating crap and not knowing better. But the favorite pre-surgery meal out? Mexican. With two margaritas. I usually ordered reasonably well but let's be honest…most restaurant food is too large or too fatty, regardless. I have a sister who is a trained chef. I know all of the tricks, and you know what? Butter really does make everything taste better. I make a sour cream cake to die for. (And given its content, you just might.) But I also have a binge-eating husband, who is a picky eater to boot. I have at least one kid who sneaks food and eats really fast. And I teeter amongst them, having been on at least half a dozen really strict diets over the years. My point is, there is no box. There's kind of an amorphous blob that covers a spectrum of behaviors, some of which is not so bad, and some of which is incredibly damaging, when indulged in regularly. And those are wrapped in an enigma and cloaked in mystery. Or misery. Not sure.

That's good stuff!

Bigbeaz, I get to go back to CrossFit this week, so I fully expect the scale and probably my bicep and thigh measurements to go up again. Even so, I'm glad I have a baseline and can compare. Today with the tape measurer it was the first time I could actually see a difference!

I had a very hard time with my husband a few years back. I pulled myself together pretty much by sheer will and powered through everything. This was also the time period when I was sick and didn't know it, holding down two jobs, and finishing my master's degree. I was also brittle, angry, and bitter, even with some of my dear friends. To be fair, they didn't provide me with a soft landing place. On the other hand, when someone negative is coming at you constantly and demanding your support, not everyone can handle the dance that is required to manage that and keep oneself sane. One of my dearest friends, in particular, went through what I essentially see now as a detox period from me. We are friends again, 5 years later, but it took a long time. And forgiveness has been required, on both sides.

Sometimes when we are hurt, we shut ourselves off from everything. This saves us from the bad stuff, but it also prevents us from really knowing and having the good stuff. Vulnerability in order to experience love and tenderness is a wonderful thing.

Woo woo, I was unclear. It's 5 weeks. But still!

Great job!

Samples of stuff. Your tastes might change! For example I bought way too much Ensure Clear and couldn't take the taste later.

One scrambled egg is fine. I can eat two sometimes. I like to use one full egg and the egg white from the second to add to the Protein count without adding a whole egg.

Butter, what you have described in your maintenance sounds like what I hope mine is. But I know you also have worked very hard (and worked out a lot) to get to the point where you can do that. Maybe I shouldn't be putting all of my eggs in the "new normal" basket. But I know from my difficult experience with gall bladder issues a few years back that to some extent the weight should come off with reduced calories, regardless of what I am actually eating. When you physically can't eat more than a little bit, it does. But I didn't make fabulous choices nutritionally either. My meals at that time looked like this: Breakfast: a slice of toast with butter Lunch: half a sandwich or burger; or Soup Dinner: handful of wheat thins and glass of wine So, not far off of the calories I'm eating now. At that time, eating too much Protein was painful. And obviously then, once I started to feel better and could eat again I easily doubled or tripled the number of calories I was eating and as a special bonus I had messed severely with my metabolism. Because when I went on Optifast two years later, I had trouble losing more than 25 pounds and I gave up. Anyway, don't mean to hijack the thread and make it about nutrition. I know what I should be doing and I'm working on making it second nature. I also know that at that time, when the weight fell off because I was feeling so sick, I had absolutely no focus on what would nourish me given that I couldn't take in very much.

Good luck!