sapMegan

I spent years using food as a comfort source. I had three children, lost the weight and then immediately put it back on plus some. I tried diets. They never worked for longer than a month or two and I always rebounded back. When I found myself forcing myself to vomit I knew that I needed to do something different. I decided in October 2013 to do the surgery (I had been researching for over a year). My husband's cousin had gotten the surgery with great success so I set up my appointments and got scheduled to do the surgery November 5th 2013. Mine wasn't a case of many health problems or inability to do physical things. I got up to 285 pounds with a bmi of 43.31. I still ran around with my kids, went swimming, climbed around on rocks, rode bikes. I had to force myself to do it though. My problems were mental health and emotional. I could not do ANYTHING without feeling embarrassed. I want to dress up... ha ha ha. I can't look pretty. I go to ride the bike and spend the whole time thinking that everyone is disgusted by the fat lady on the bike. I have problems with anxiety and depression... It was time. I had no doubts whatsoever. I felt terrible about spending the money because it was self pay and spending $18,000 on myself is just selfish right? I was so wrong. I'll get to that later. A week before surgery I go on the sugar free diet. Vitamins, Protein shakes, sugar free popsicles, Jello and drinks. It was a tough week. I had one bad day, Halloween. I ate a lot of candy. But even with that day I lost 13 pounds that week. The day of surgery comes. They are doing the sleeve and repairing a hiatal hernia. I'm fine with my husband but then they wheel me back to the pre-op room and I sit there waiting for my turn ALONE. THAT's when it all hits me. Oh crap, am I doing the right thing? Could I lose the weight on my own? Is it too much money? OMG THEY'RE GOING TO CUT OFF MOST OF MY STOMACH! I managed to sift through the craziness and calm myself down. I needed this. I deserved this. Surgery comes and goes I wake up in the recovery room. They immediately start shoving cups in my face. Lovely little one ounce cups. They have about a hundred of them all stacked up. Only 8 have Water. My mission. To drink them. But the nausea! HOW can I drink them?!? They have these lovely contraptions strapped to my calves, they aren't uncomfortable, kind of comforting actually, consistently hugging my calves and they keep my legs warm. The only problem is that I can't get them off because I am SO out of it! I can barely do anything but lay curled up in the fetal position in absolute misery. I have them move the table around so I can reach the water and I convince myself I can do this. I drink a cup. Wow... I didn't realize I could feel WORSE! I drink the nasty potassium crap they give me and that does it. I am going to throw up. I call the nurse, tell them I need the things off my legs I'm going to throw up. They don't make it in time. Now those of you who have had children know a certain amount of bladder control is lost. When I puke, I pee. That simple. So they come in the room and I am crying because it hurts to throw up and I am dry heaving because I really didn't have much in my stomach and it can't get the stuff out that it wants out. And of course I'm peeing at the same time! It's not fun walking to and from the bathroom or standing up but it's more nausea than pain. And the IV ugh I hate those things. After then next time that they didn't get there to get the things off my legs they just left them off and I would just go sit on the toilet with a puke cup in hand whenever I tried to drink anything. The surgeon was very impressed with how much I drank. I don't think he realized most of it came right back up! Getting discharged the next day was a huge relief. I was ready to get away from the never ending cups and demands that I puke drink. The drive home was not fun with the constant stop and go. Keep in mind it wasn't pain. I actually don't remember much of any pain. It was the nausea! I should have expected it. My stomach has always been finicky. Car sickness, throwing up 8-10 times a day when pregnant, motion sickness. Should have seen it coming. I got home and slept. I was literally hiding up in my room for about 5 days. Didn't even bother going downstairs. I slept, peed, tried to drink but eventually just figured out I should just sit in the shower and try to drink in there. I would sit on the floor of the shower and forced down my liquid pain med (I liked it because it made me sleep REALLY well) and drink some water. Then I would continue to sit there as I heaved. I was supposed to take my vitamins immediately. I couldn't stomach the chewables and my prescription Vitamin was huge. I would get into my stomach and I would feel like I had something stuck there and be even sicker. It took me the next 2 months to get up to my 3 vitamins a day. Meanwhile my stomach HATED me. Everything made me sick. Plain water made me miserable but the taste of anything sugar free was too sweet. I spent the next month living off of a maximum of 40 calories a day. I couldn't get all my vitamins in, couldn't stomach Protein Shakes and gagged on the foods I was allowed. I tried having different things but well, I gagged on most everything, or threw up. I was able to function (for short periods of time) after the first week. I would get kids off to school, cuddle with my 2 year old, pick kids up from school and then went to bed as soon as hubby got home. I would sleep until morning. I didn't get back to making it a full day until probably 3 months later. Even then I would crash hard on the weekends and often spent the whole day in bed. My husband was an angel through all of this and didn't complain once. Even when I stopped crashing on the weekends regularly I would randomly have a day I just couldn't do it. Meanwhile I STUNK. If you haven't read posts about stinking... you WILL stink at some point. My skin oozed a bitter nasty smell. No matter how much a washed, what I washed wish, how much lotion I rubbed on I STUNK to high heaven. Apparently it's a good thing, a sign that you are burning fat but it was miserable and made me feel super gross. A lot of foods tasted different for me. I would have cravings and try to eat it and be really disappointed because it didn't taste the way I remembered it. And pretty much anything I put in would make me sick. I discovered string cheese and apple juice. They were all I wanted to eat, the only things that tasted good and didn't make me sick. Let me tell you, it makes it REALLY hard to cook dinner for your family when you know all you're going to do is reach in the fridge for a string cheese! I lost 50 pounds in the first 2 months. After that it slowed down a lot. I lost 10 pounds a month, I lost 5 pounds. Now I tend to drop unexpectedly 4 or 5 pounds, go back up 2 and float, go back down to the "lowest" sit there for a while and then it will start over again. In case that was confusing.... 9/2 I was 181. by 9/5 I was 177.5, 9/19 I'm 179 and in the next week I will probably be back down to the 177.5. I don't really watch my food a lot. Well let me rephrase that. I have accepted there are MANY foods that don't make me feel good so I don't eat them. I mostly eat string cheese and drink sugar free koolaid. I take my vitamins but protein shakes still don't work for me. It was emotionally hard for a while. I couldn't eat anything, much less the food I WANTED to eat. Food was my comfort and it was no longer available. It took a little adjusting but watching the weight change helped a lot. I hoped that losing all the weight would help with my back. It did, for a while. It quickly came back with a vengeance and hurts in different ways. I started going to a chiropractor and getting massage therapy and that helps a ton but does not fix everything. A lot of people would read this and feel overwhelmed and discouraged and think it was one of the horror stories. NOT SO. This surgery was absolutely the best decision I have ever made. It is so much more than losing weight. It is being able to run and play and be stupid and silly with my children without feeling like everyone is disgusted with me. It's being able to have my husband actually reach around my body and not be squished well beyond comfort. It's being able to twist my legs up however I want in a restaurant booth. It's feeling beautiful again and not doubting it like I did when I was younger. Honestly I feel more beautiful now than EVER before. It's being able to dress cute again and buy the clothes I like. It's not being embarrassed for being me. It is freedom. I have lost 106 pounds in 10 months and 12 days, I am 19 pounds from my goal but I'm not sure it's really my goal anymore. I went from a tight size 20 pants to a size 12. I can now wear medium men's shirts and large women's, I used to be in a 2xl men's. My boobies for the ladies wondering. I was a 42J and am now a 38G. They are very flat, long and wide. I lost inches in places I didn't think I had inches to lose. I wish I could give you details but I lost my paper My joints don't cause me any pain now days except for my hips but it is VERY rare. My next step it plastics. My boobs are causing a lot of neck pain so I'm hoping my insurance will cover them. I'm planning to get a reduction and then I'm going to be going in for a circumfrential lift (LBL). I have a lot of excess skin and fat in my stomach and a lot of skin on my hips. Honestly if I can take care of those things then I don't feel the need to lose even one more pound. I don't know that I remembered to include everything but hopefully this helps SOMEONE out there.

My chronically skinny friends wont get this and my overweight friends immediately mae "envy comments".... so I come here. I can buy normal clothes! I have NEVER bought clothes at Costco despite it being my parents' favorite store, Today I bought 2 shirts there! Larges! Nd they're loose! I felt super excited. Had to share w/people who get it!

I need to dedicate a special celebration dance! Way to go McB! May your body continue shrinking!

That is one of my favorite things about having lost weight! They are so beautiful! I got a tattoo along mine to help emphasize it! Congrats!!!

I found quite a few posts on here about it actually. It's all about sugar/calorie intake. It's not the same smell that some of the really large people get. It smells nothing like regular BO and isn't even musty smelling. For me it was this weird bitter smell. My husband claimed he didn't notice unless I stuck my skin up against his face but I swear I smelled it any time I moved. It was my whole body, not just armpits, under breasts or anything. My forearms even smelled. it was weird.

It's funny because a lot of people look at my experience and think "that's awful" and get scared by it. I would not change it. I have no fear of "failure" that so many people talk of because of how sensitive my stomach is. I can eat the absolute worst that my body will let me and I won't gain weight. So many people talk about this being a tool and I totally agree but I have been fortunate enough to have an incredible sensitive sleeve and I LOVE it. It is about as close to a "cure" for me as I could possibly get! I LOVE MY PUKE-INESS!!!! I will tell you it is 100% worth any misery you may experience. Incision pain will go away, nausea will at least become more manageable. You learn to adapt to the way you can eat and will learn to love NOT thinking about food all the time! Granted there are people with post-op complications and my heart goes out to them... that's a whole other ball game.

It may be that it was due to my SUPER low calorie intake. I started stinking within the first week and it kept up for a few months! Crappy to stink but nice to drop weight so fast.

I still haven't found one I can stomach. They just don't set well with me and set off my gag reflex big time (which is super sensitive since surgery)

I forgot to mention I did lose hair, a LOT of hair. The loss started around 4 months and lasted for about 2 months! I just chopped it off so it wouldn't bug me so much to have a thin ponytail! Still worth it!

I know I have problems still (10 months post op vsg) with eating many foods. My sleeve just does NOT tolerate many foods. Too much candy, icecream, breads... the list goes on. It also chang the way food tastes so many things just don't appeal because they don't taste right. Unfortunately not everyone is affected in these ways. In your situation where you know you have sugar control issues (I think all of us here do/did) the rny might be smarter be ause you KNOW it will forc the issue vs the vsg where you just hope it does. I preferred the vsg because the et e werent so many vitamin deficiency issues and I love it.

Thanks for all the good thoughts! I love reading people's responses because there always seems to be a tidbit to take out of it that is a little different than my way of thinking. Definitely got some good things here!

So I'm a little confused. 15 pounds ago I felt better about my body than I do now. I've lost just over 100, have 22.5 left to goal and yet now when a pound comes off I feel worse. The only explanation I can come up with is that I am 7 pounds heavier than I was all through high school and my body looks SO much bigger than it did then. And my stomach doesn't seem to be getting any smaller. Is anyone else running into this? It's frustrating to go from feeling better with evry pound o worse. Any suggestions? HELP PLEASE!

Oh and sugarfree koolaid (make it with splenda instead f sugar) and string cheese are pretty much what I live on... have been for the last 6-7 months. Weird but they NEVER upset my stomach.

I had tons of problems early on... crazy nausea, needing tons of sleep, inability to eat much of anything, couldn't get my supplements or ven Water down... it was a rough go. Hubby would come home from work and I would go to bed and sleep 14+ hours. Now, 9 months later, I feel SO much better than even before the surgery. I still hve to watch what I eat, lots of foods make me sick, every once in a while I'll crash hard where I literaly can't do anything but lay down. But for th most part my back pain is way down, I'm sleeping a more normal amount again, can take any meds I need and can keep up with anyone around me. Plud you just feel more comfortable being involved and having fun when all that extra weight isn't packed on. Point is, I've been there, it WILL get better, you will not regret it. Take time to recooperate, sleep extra, sit down more, don't worry about the exercising until you can make it through a normal day without being completely exhausted. Your body will let you know when it is ready to exercise. Right now, it may do you more harm than good t push yourself. Good luck.

I have discovered that my body is quick to produce the "rollercoaster" effect in my stomach now! I jump on the trampoline, tummy tickles, swing on a swing... more tummy tickles, do underwater sommersaults it tickles again! It's that lovely stomach dropping feel you get when you drive quick over certain hills or go down on a rollercoaster. I'm not positive I like it but I figured I'd share! Extra bonus: I can do all those things and not be worried I look ridiculous, or will break something!

I also took mine out when I was prego. But few months later they went right back ib Mine were still within the two months when I got pregnant so when I took them out they were gone I want them back again, but not on these saggy things!

After nursing 2 babies I had ZERO sensation. I was hoping to get it back and whoa did I. Now I've nursed another one and it's gone again. Plus they're pretty and they are kind of a sexy little secret... what's not to love. As for your wife, to each there own. I personally think that piercing and tattoos are beautiful (within certain limits) but everybody's version of beauty is different. Some like all natural, some like the extra decorating.

I had mine done several years ago, had to take them out when I got prego because holy crap you even tap those things and OWWW!!! At least that's how mine were for 3 months before I gave up. Waiting till after a boob job to do them again, it would SO not be attractive right now!

I went through this. Think about it this way. The stinkier you are the more fat your body is burning I stunk to high heaven the first 2 months but I lost 60 pounds. The smell went away as I started being able to eat more and more weight loss slowed WAY the heck down. I'm praying for my stench to come back right now!

Mine have gotten 2 inches shorter! From armpit to nipple.... poor sad saggy boobies. They're still crazy... 8 inches long, 5 inches wide 1 inch thick. YUCK! I've been looking into lifts/implants. I found a video that talks about how skin can only stretch to a certain point and recover so when we put on a lot of weight and our boobs get giganto the skin is never going to tighten back up and make them "normal". All the exercises in the world won't tighten skin, they only tighten muscle.... sad but true... I see more surgery in my future!

I think it would be fair to say he is trying to protect himself. Affairs kick asses. Even if you have worked through everything, gone through therapy and such he is still going to have triggers that bring unbearable amounts of pain that he can't control. You losing weight could most definitely bring up the pain of the affair and his fear of you having another one is very real and possible all-consuming. He probably isn't feeling really safe right now. Just love him in all the other ways, he'll come to you when he's ready. Oh and be very transparent about everything you are doing so that his fears can be laid to rest through time and consistency.

So my anxiety/depression have been CRAZY since having the surgery. I'm wondering did people have to switch meds or increase meds, anybody decrease? I go in to see my doc Wednesday but I wanted to get an idea of what other people had to do!