desertmom

5 beautiful years. Some drastic lifestyle changes (I went back to school and stopped all exercise like playing squash, running and cycling as well as reformer pilates) contributed to me gaining about 25 pounds in the last year and I am ready to lose them again. The problem is I can eat and drink anything and a lot of anything too. I have had many health challenges over the past 3 years and am in menopause, flashing like a red light all the time. Nothing helps and the hormones that were prescribed drove me nuts! But life is great. I never did go for any plastics as I was too scared. Of course I regret this now. However, if I can manage to lose this weight I will go for a facelift as I look really old, and maybe some more work. Dieting will be an adjustment as I seem to have this same old I will start tomorrow therefor feast today mentality at the moment. Today was the first day of low carb, protein first and I got through the day ok. As I sit here, I wonder how many of the other "old timers" have maintained and how many are still battling the bulge like me 😂😂😂😂😂

Today 2 years ago I had the sleeve.The best gift I ever gave myself. Its been 2 years of the biggest ups and downs EVER.Sometimes when I read back what I wrote I know its been the hardest and the best 2 years of my life. After surgery I found out that my happy little family wasnt so happy after all.I developed neuropathy on top of going into menopause and at any other time,my life would have fallen apart. But having this new lease on life has given me the strength to deal with everything life has thrown my way.My little kid is weight restored,I have in the process dealt with my own eating disorder and life is really good today. I have been maintaining my weight for the past +- 15 months and I look and feel great.My weight sometimes goes up 5 pounds and then I focus on proteins and bring it down again.I can eat anything and dont take PPI anymore.Of course my capacity is a bit bigger but I am vigilant all the time.I do eat little bits of everything and try not to snack too often. Sometimes I do still consider plastics (ugg the arms is a big issue) but time and logistics remains a huge problem.And the fact that I am scared..lol All in all life is great.I will keep posting at least once a year.And should I hit a bump in the road,I will come back to the site and get right back on track again.

Dodgergirl, My weight fluctuates (spelling?) a lot.That hasnt changed for me?I gain,I have to lose. I dont fuss too much about it and buy myself some chicken.Drumstick with thigh on it.Then I just start munching away at it for the first couple of days.Every time I feel hungry.Grazing on Protein fills me up super quick.(I also have been able to eat way more than most sleevers right from the start)I dont plan on not eating carbs but just dont have space for any.I still drink full fat coffee (starbucks a couple of times a day) string cheese in between.Actually any ham,beef Jerky,anything protein to fill me up.It really just takes me 2 days to not crave anything anymore.Then I start adding controlled low gi carbs into the mix.of course I have days that I really eat some nice things vut then I just get right back on track the next day.Its like learning to flex a complete new muscle,takes some practise though. Of course,different things works for different people and I am a grazer.Cannot deny myself when I need a snack.So,I just snack guilt free!For me,giving up the idea of having to go on diet to lose the weight really really changed my life.(My kid has anorexia and dieting is stricktly forbidden in my house,I had to change my mindset double time when she got sick,we also had to get rid of our scale habits...lol) Hope you find what works for you.You can do it!

I am writing this to myself as a reminder for the future when I need to drop a couple of pounds again. 3 days of protein first and 4 of the 5 pounds have just melted off.This sleeve works if you work it!

My 12 year old was diagnosed with Anorexia nervosa a month ago and I HAVE GAINED 5 pounds in the past couple of weeks.It feels like I am eating for her and as we have to have normal earing patterns around her I cannot cut of full fats or carbs. THIS IS ANY WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY PATIENTS NIGHTMARE! I am not allowed to have scales around anymore which drives me nuts as well.The fact tht my life has stopped since we are in stage 1 of redeeding her is not helping as I am bored and stressed.But we are growing a lot stronger as individuals and as a family and that is super positive.Healthy happy,whole people will emerge from the eye of this storm. Anyhow,will update as I am now secretly trying to drop this 5 again without anyone noticing.Which is a bit tricky but I recon exercise will have to become part of my life now.I can do it when she is at school.Good thing too as I can do with a lot of toning. xxo

It is 18 months since I was sleeved and I absolutely love my sleeve.I am 8 pounds under my goal weight which is a little to low (my face looks very wrinkly at this weight) Have been in maintenance since about Jan Feb this year and it is so easy to maintain.I do have a strategy I live by though. 1.Weigh every morning.The scale is my friend and I allow myself at most 4 pounds up before I get backto basics.And as my weight never goes up gradually (it jumps up 4 pounds after a week or 2 of loss of fucused eating),it is always easy to get back to protiens for about 4 days and it is gone again. 2.Eat little bits of most food but protein as the primary food source. 2.No excuses when I gain. 3.Not denying myself but never OVER indulging either. Now in this year a lot of very heavy emotional stuff happened in my life and to some extent I have to rebuild my whole life.The blessing of the sleeve is I couldnt eat away my emotions anymore and am learning to deal with it.I am also in therapy now.In my house everyone now eats healthy,regularly and we are learning to really enjoy food.My youngest child developed an eating disorder (she's only 12 now)for which the blame can be laid at my feet.My obsession with food,no,food,weight related issues coupled with a few comments like gymnasts who is lighter finds it easier in higher levels (she's level 8) have made her decide to self restrict her food and at first I thought I was eating much more as my food portions was all of a sudden the same size than hers.After cutting my food to almost nothing I realized that HER PORTIONS WERE AS SMALL AS MINE. Anyway,it showed me my obsession have hurt my children and that they need me to eat with them,which I stopped doing after surgery.I also have to eat mostly what they eat.NORMAL is what I have to do even though my portions cannot be normal.She is doing somewhat better but I have to super vigilant and consistant in my food behaviour as she is not Completely out of the woods yet. Life is really good as we are all learning by the grace of God how to communicate,express,eat and live life as whole people. I still have vitamin issues and borderline low protein but we are working hard on fixing this (side effect of all this is I still lose way too much hair all the time) I am so greatful to have had this surgery.It gave me a life I never would have had.It has helped me change a lot of the issues that kept me in one place.My motto of life is to be managed not to be cured still stands but have a different meaning altogether now.Mindful, intentional living is great! The sleeve rocks

hi I am not on the site a lot anymore as I am sooo busy. But I said I would update anything that has to do with the VSG and here I am. So,the burning and tingling sensation in my hands and feet seems to be peripheral neuropathy,ideopathic bu definetely caused by the surgery.We are doing extensive bloods at the moment to try and find some sort of deficiency. This is nerve damage but the cause is still unknown.If it wasnt for the pain in my hands and feet at night I would not have been so franctic to find the cause but I qm suffering quite a bit.I am smoke free and my weight is between 158 and 163 but I am not really gaining or losing anymore.I would like to weight 154 but I am quite thin even at 160 so I am happy. Well,I will post test results next week.Please pray for me as this is so scary.I feel if I have tight gloves on my hands and arms and my legs up to my knees as well.I know it is not life threatening but boy it drives you crazy as your arms and legs feel like they are asleep,just waking up.....lol. Anyhoo,I am doing ok.Had a crazy crazy year and thank goodness I am thin.This made it possible for me to really cope with all that has happened and all the travelling I have had to do this year. God is good,all the time! xxo

In the beginning of Aprill I stopped smoking but started chewing the nicotine gum.I did fantastic while on the gum with not smoking. But the gum gave me extremely severe gastritis.I started refluxing like crazy and had to stop using the gum.Now this is where my challenge started.One must never ever underestimate the power of an addiction.I have gained 6 pounds in the last month.Yes,boys and girls,all of the buffer weight I allow myself is gone,just like that. What is worse I am eating like I have never had the sleeve.Dont ask me how.I just can.I am never uncomfortable.Never feel like I over eat.I think I just pace myself very nicely and keep eating all day long. IT IS ABSOLUTELY CRAZY TO FEEL THIS OUT OF CONTROL AGAIN. My very worried friend brought me the number of a therapist who works with eating disorders and I am going to go and see her.It feels like before the sleeve when I just couldnt stop.I even eat chocolate,which doesnt taste particularly nice to me.BUT I HAVENT HAD ANY NICOTINE (since stopping the gum) in 4 days now.I ama super b***h,have fired my lazy housekeeper,put my kid on a bus instead of a taxi (she refuses to keep a budget) and gave the little one a permanent tv ban during the week.Everyone hates me but feeling like a maniac at least makes me a little more assertive than usual. But this is sooooo hard.I have a huge oral fixation.My life feels empty and sad when Im not able to get a high from something I stuff into my mouth,all the time.Thank goodness I sorted the alcohol thing out with myself as this would have been the perfect crutch now if I didnt make the choice to never drink to much or too often. Anyhow,this is to warn people.Get into that healthy life style.Exercise.See the shrink,deal with your issues or they will deal with you,like mine are now. I am back on my chicken and am not gaining weight anymore.The evenings are just still a challenge as this is when I want to really smoke.I also need to turf this chocolate ganash that I have in the fridge and I will be ok. My aim is to lose this weight in 2 weeks but I will tell this blog when the 2 weeks starts.My imediate goal is to just get over the smoke thing and stay quit.Boy I sometimes just want to say whatever and have a smoke but I know is is just practicing saying no to myself.Something I am not very good at and the reason I got so fat in the first place. So,no!I will not gain more.No,I will not smoke again!No,I will not eat that chocolate (well,maybe a little...lol.)

10 days ago,while on holiday no less,I stopped smoking.It has been a challenge but I am not going to smoke again.I decided not to stress too much about my eating as I have visitors that eats nothing but junk and carbs.They do not eat any of the food we usually eat.For some reason this made me super self concious and I started cooking rubbish and eating it too. Yesterday I weighed and was up 5 pounds already.This made me realize a couple of things.This is out life and my house.If they dont like the food we usually eat,let them either cook for themselves or go get takeouts.My kids have alos gained weight already and my little 12 year old is a gymnast and competition time is coming up.She cannot afford to gain weight now. So I started cooking healthy foods again and I am down 2 pounds already.Avoiding the carbs just a little and sugar completely.Sugar is not my friend..lol. The health issues are still there but as soon as the visitors are gone I will see the phycisian again.My hands and feet are a little better but I still have a lot of pain.The bruising comes and goes and the back and neck ache seems to be under control. Life is good.I have decided to tackle issues as they come up and not regret anything about having the sleeve.I LIKE BEING THINNER THAN EVERYONE ELSE.it makes me feel great and I will keep it this way.No matter what. We stayed at a stunning resort last week.There were these "toys" (a trampoline a bananna slide ect ect) in the sea.Usually I couldnt get on these things and would never even attempt to.But with a little ecouragement from the kids I got onto each and everyone of those things and we had a ball of a time.This again made me realize how different life is now. Of course the fact that I fit into a size 10 (UK) freaked me out completely..lol.The size 36B bra is totally crazy as well. So,this is me for now.Enjoying life,trying to find the balance with the food and just getting use to the new normal I now live.

Thanks for the responses! Well,the burning and tingling in my hands might be related to the fine rash of blisters that I have started developing this week...I might have shingles after all! But till I can get to see the dr.I have started adding a lot of new stuff to my pills...lol. CoQ10,fish oil pills and extra vit D and some magnesium and extra vit C. My hands still tingle but that terrible burn has been a bit better for 2 days now.The pain is also less.Got meself a tempur pillow to go with my lovely tempur bed and my neck feels a bit better.Decided to sit if I cant stand...lol. I do really hope the bruising goes away just because and seeing as I cant fix these issues just like that,I must just learn to manage it day by day.Of course you can hear Im having a good day..relatively painfree and I had about 6 hours sleep last night..lol. No seriously though!I was a fat,healthy person with the constitution of an ox...lol.It just overwhelms me sometimes when I realize I am taking pain killers every day or when I go shopping with my girls and have to bail out halfway...THAT HAS NEVER HAPPENED IN MY LIFE! It scares me when I realize our dr's here in the UAE knows NOTHING about bariatric surgery!They question you when you say you have to do one year post op bloods.The vitamins we can find here is sub standard and something like bariatric viamins is unheard of.Even powdered vit D ( which I need as my D stays very low even with high D supplements) is not available.I am going to try and buy it with shop and ship and see if they confiscate it. Ok,so tomorrow part 2.the great year I've had,how interesting maintenance is and what I do right and wrong now!

For the past week I have been thinking of what to write for my one year update. Firstly,I dont regret having the sleeve as far having lost the weight and the way I am looking.It feels good to be thin even though I have loads of extra hanging skin. But,and I am so sad that there has to be a but here... I went into menopause at the age of 45 3 months after having the surgery.At the time my dr said it might just be because I am losing a lot of stored estrogen and the symptoms might disappear,but it didnt quite go away.I now have a period every 4 mnths or so and hotflashes,as they please.Horrible to be dealing with this now.Anyway,I am dealing with it. I am bruised black and blue the whole time.Bruises that is clearly not casued by bumps as they are in such strange places.My bloods are all out of wack,different ones every time I have it done.The amount of pills I have to take is unreal.This would be fine if it wasnt affecting my stomach the way it does.I now have to add carafate to the PPi I am taking.As for the bruising,no one seems to know why this is happening and I am due for more tests in the next couple of weeks.The one thing that has also changed drastically is my lipid profile.My TC was never high,I had great HDL and LDL was normal.Now my HDL is super low,my LDL is super high and my Tc borders on high.Who knows how the heck that happens while losing 137 pounds? About a month ago I started having symptoms of peripheral neuropathy.I dont want to comment on this too much as I am still inshock dealing with the burning,tingling and pain in my hands and feet.I hope this will go away with the supplements I am taking as I have no idea how one live with this indefintely without going stir crazy. Just to top all this and make it more interesting,my neck,back and tailbone is giving me hell.I seem to be growing a hump om my upperback and the kids tell me I am bent like the moon.I have a lot of upperback and neck pain but the bad thing is I cannot atand for longer than a couple of seconds before my lower back is killing me.I can sit and I can walk,no problem.I just cannot stand. I am extremely sad that things are not as straight forward for me as for others as it would have been nice to enjoy being at goal at this point.To have dealt with my fears about having plastics as I am almoat ready to so it I dislike my arms that much...lol. However I am constantly trying to deal with some health fallouts at the moment.I am so scared that this will be my life now.Hands and feet on fire,a back that cause for me to have to sit down all the time.A neck that keeps me awake all night and to top that I look like I was in a bad accident or fight,all the time. This all sounds so negative.But I might have gotten sick just from being fat if I didnt have this surgery.If only dealing with these issues werent so complex.If only there were some easy answers and fixes.I am a fixer.I am a doer.If something is wrong,fix it and most of my issues I cannot only not fix,I can hardly manage them. Maybe in a couple of months I will find myself healthy.Painfree!Burn free!Free of bruises!Taking less than 15 pills a day.But for now I am a little fearful about my future. And then I want to just delete this post as it isnt what I want things to be like and about. But then I will leave it to read in a little while when things are better and the problems have been resolved. Part 2 will talk about all the nice stuff...like wearing a size 36B bra..hehehe!And having bought a size 10,yes a size 10 broadshort, yesterday!Not all is bad and life does go on!

Hi, Congrats!Today is also my one year surgiversary!

Today is one year since surgery and I find myself wanting to think about it before I post more....LOL

Have been MIA for a while.I returned 1 day before moving house and have been unpacking and sorting out stuff since then. I have lost another couple of pounds and am at 158 most days.This seems to me the perfect weight for me.I am skinny.I really look thin.Even I can see it now.No more saddle bags on legs! Stomach is flat as a pancake,boobs non exisitent even thought they hang on my knees,no butt whatsoever..lol. Life is good and I have been eating a lot of junk and still losing weight.Am maybe not eating as much as I think. We love love love our new house.It has a huge lap pool with a jaccuzi and a sauna.It also has a lake view.Beautiful to sit putside or run next to the lake. I will be seeing physician next week as I need bloods done.I am so bruised it is unreal.My back also aches like mad if I stand.Can sit,lie down and even walk and be ok but not stand in one place.My eyes seems to be soing ok and thecoated toungue issues continues.I have taken stuff for thrush numerous times to no avail. All in all life is great and I am very happy.We are taking a short seaside break in a couple of weeks so I need new bathing suite and broad shorts.The arms I cannot hide.In fact my friend told me it makes me look old,nice friend,lol!So even if I never do my boobs,legs bodylift or facelift,I will so my arms.Then no one can see that I look strange for my age..lol Will post when blood results are in and on the 13th.