desertmom

You can do this.One day at a time.Dont think about tomorrow yet.Just focus on doing your best for today.And talk to us on here whenever you need to,good news or bad days.It really really helps keep us accountable! That bicycle ride is getting closer every day!

Well,good for you.Each one of us have to figure out for ourselves why we are treated differently now. As for me,I dont think I would have had as many friends as I do if I was not approachable before (hey,Im a longterm expat,our friends are our family) and I still feel like me,a little more reserved now as I dont like the attention too much.I kind of feel been there,done that with these people.We have been in the same social circle for 10 years and I find it hard to now all of a sudden think we have something in common other than we are all thin!I dont like or dislike them,they are just aquantances because they chose to be that.It does make me very,very uncomfortable when they are the ones (that hardly ever said more than hallo to me) to now loudly say stuff like:oooo,you've lost so much weight,what is your secret? Or ooo,you look so good,my name is Carin,what is yours again?Come on,I still have the same name that hasnt changed and if you cannot remember it after so long,why would you now?See,I wasnt sarcastic or anything like that before but these thought certainly enter my mind now.I smile,say my name,say if I tell its not a secret anymore...and as far as Im concerned a coffee morning seems quite unnecessary as we've said what we needed to already.What would we talk about,my secret? Having said all this,I have noticed some of my obese friends dont phone as often as before and when we do go out they are the ones that always starts talking about their weight and the reasons why they are still struggling.One actually said she couldnt have this surgery as she needed to have a long life for her CP child.I did think say what? at that point but I never,ever talk about my weight loss or weight with them,ever.It made me feel worse about myself when my friends that lost weight would start telling me what to do or how great life was,I just have to try again ect ect. This does make me see how defensive overweight people can sometimes be,and for good reasons I think. Ugg,This is a sticky issue but not one Im losing sleep over...lol.You cannot choose your family,but you sure can shoose your friends!

Hi Oregondaisy, Ok,so when you snack at night,what kind of Snacks made you gain? I snack at nite also but very,very controlled and very well planned! I now dont eat after 20:30 but will have sf popcicle when I have a night when I am walking up and down between the kitchen and the family room looking for something "nice" (am not allowed to eat anything until I can figure out what "nice's" name is,and at 10 months havent figured that out yet) Its good to find out what will help and what will hinder in future as I am really scared that I will start gaining.I am still losing and should be at dr's goal next week.Still going to lose 10 after that but I am eating all the food I want and need and think maintenance might be just the same at least for a while.Happy for it to stay like this!

Ok,my body likes what Im doing! Today I weigh 167.5. Before I never realized I was losing quite fast.Since I have started posting in this threat I can actually see how Im losing and it feels great!

Hi 6 weeks after I had my sleeve I found out some stuff about my past that could and previously would have made me crawl back into my own world with my best friend food as my only constant companion.My whole perception of my life as I thought I knew it was changed in one conversation.Moving to a far away place where no one knew me and pretending I was an orphan with no family seemed like a good option to me...lol. I couldnt turn to food for comfort for the first time ever.It has been a heck of a learning curve and a looong road to take the positives in each day,let the past be the past as I couldnt change a thing about it,and deal with my feelings.Forgiveness has new meaning to me now and my life has never been better. Accepting that I might always need a "smaller" life than others seems ok to me now.God graciously granted me a life in which I can function well.I might never be able to do "big" things but I am happier being the mom,the taxi,the comfort to my family.I am content with where I am at today.I have learnt that I dont need to make excuses for my life.I need to live with an abundance of joy every day. I struggle with how different people treat me though.The same people that ignored me for years now want to make friends with me and I am just not there yet.I am friendly but still cannot understand this.I struggle with the attention and I am shyer than I was before.A lot quieter too. Life is about change and I do plan to overcome more of my stuff.But I suppose it is a process. For now,all is well with my soul!

Hi A little tip for restaurant eating when you've been sleeved.I know they say dont drink before a meal but I could in 10 months not figure out why I lose so much weight when on holiday staying in hotels and eating out.At home I can always eat bigger portions.Yesterday I figured it out. I always have a cappucino before I eat when we eat out.Seeing as that I cannot drink with food or after food,I have it before my food.It use to frustrate me that I couldnt eat more than 5 bites when I am in public.But I never drink before I eat at home and this is the only thing that is different. I totally love eating out and have joked with my family that if my weight loss ever slowed down I would leave them to stay in a hotel until I get to goal.Love feeling full so quickly and love losing so much weight while eating at all my favourite places. Ps.often critisism like that got us to a place of feeling defeated about this issue at quite a young age.Dont tell her if you dont want to.She will freak if she sees how little you eat in future though..lol

I also really hate the skin.Boobs,tummy butt,legs and arms.It is so overwhelming to think of all the surgery I still need that I have decided to ignore it for a year. I dont want to do it for anyone else though.Just not to look at this 75 year old body on a 45 year old person..lol Do it if you need to.My friend had her ps at12 months out.

Not once!

Jac1970. The less we react to it,the faster they get tired of doing this.Laugh about it!It feels like people will try and try and try to see if the old us is still inside there somewhere.But that person is gone.This is a new you.Now keep showing em the new you. And as for some people,we might never get their approval,but heck,I will take skinny any day over that!

Hi Gonna give my 2 cents about temptation. The sooner one learns to deal with this,the better.Normal weight people eat those kinds of "unacceptables" all the time.We are confronted with it all the time.The way I dealt with it was to resist it and cry for it,(behind closed doors though) I mourned it until I could see it for what it was,EVIL..lol. And then I realized that it holds no power over me anymore as I CHOOSE to dislike these things from now on. Now,when I am tempted I remind myself that I dislike it,it wants to make me fat again.It really works every time.It took me about 6 months to get there though.My "go to's" have changed completely.I have a nice acceptable treat to counter almost every craving or desire.Now I know,I did have to fake it to make it in the end and it became so for me.I now really dont like ice cream,cake,crisps,Pasta,bread.They suck!lol

I suppose a pear that is poached..lol.Or steamed I might think.!aybe I should do that with apples and make a very small crumble to go with it.

When I can figure this out Im gonna have it...lol I've been feeling like having something nice lately,a constant thought.Just cant figure out what that is.Unless I retry everything,I dont think I'll ever know and that sounds like to much hassle to me. I do miss some really yummy comfort desert.Like apple pie and cream! Ok,just saying!

Hi,please tell me how you get all your protein in that way?I hardly manage with eating meat and chicken.Would love to eat more plant based foods and protein.

Sounds like a stricture!

Hi I too was a volume eater,binge eater to be frank. Now,I know that this surgery gives us the chance to change permanently.But it also depends on how honest we can be with ourselves on a daily basis. My friend that had GB a year before me has regained 40 pounds already.She says she struggles with Protein and eats what she can.That is her story and she is sticking to it.When I had her over for a meal,that did include complex carbs,she called me obsessed with Proteins...she is in strong denial that she is doing this to herself and she is back in that pattern of self loathing and not ready to see that she can change this. I think it also depends on how ready we are to commit to this as a daily mindful process.It is a daily thing,I think for the rest of our lives.Just like my skinny friends eat healthy most of the time and "nice" stuff some times,not whatever they want as muh as they can possibly get into their bodies,we will have to do the same. And its diffcult to say what is different this time (I have lost 100+ quite a few times in my life only to regain) but something is different.I think was just ready for the change and when I dont feel like co-operating,I do anyway...lol. Good luck and this sleeve might not be a magic bullet,but for me,it is totally life changing.

Hi again, You know,thinking back,and reading that it was your first time for the bread and the rice,I remembered that we all try these things at some point.And a lot of us feel that same old self condemnation from before.But I also remember that this is how I learnt how to not do these things. I would worry that I am eating way too much.Or when I had even a little bit of anything off plan that I was sliding badk into my old habits.I did push the limits and then would realize but wait,it is possible,and not so it again. All this is part of learning what to do and what not to repeat.And I bet you a lot of people that says I have never...well,they might just not remember it that well. So as long as you dont push your sleeve with too much and you remember Protein first,enjoy your food.Cook tasty food.Eat complex carbs in small quantity if you need carbs. This is hard and I still freak out every time I have something that I havent had before and it goes down way too easy.I had a crazy moment earlier this week after eating mash and a few bites of cheesecake for the first time.One meal but it felt like I was right back where I started. Month 8 I lost 14 pounds after I upped my cals and fats quite a lot (went full fat after reading studies on low fat).These changes messes with my my though but boy my body loves it.Everyone is commenting on how nice my skin looks these days. You just keep working on this,one day at a time.

I think it might be key for you to start tracking your intake again.Just so you can see how many cals you are actually eating.Then to maybe eat small frequent meals might help as well. Being an ex bandster my sleeve did the purging for me for a while and I realized that this might become a problem fast. You know what the problem is.Now,make a plan to deal with it.Maybe see a behaviour therapist if you cannot cope on your own. Good luck.

Not a fueler here either...lol The smell of food,the flavour,the taste POPS for me since surgery.I like it so much more now.I cook food that is so much tastier! We need healthy oils.Cooking with olive oil makes food tastier.It fills you up faster too.There is a lot of herbs and spices that actually really helps us lose weight. Read up on this a little and let your imagination and creativity take over...lol

Hi,we do it very slowly in the beginning.And I mean,rest enough,sip,sip,sip.Be nice to yourself.Take liquid pain meds when needed. I didnt move much for 10 days,I felt way to sorry for myself to think about moving much.Thought my life was over..lol.Just walked slowly down the stairs every hour to get more Water or broth.And then I felt much better after 10 days. Just hang in there,it will get much better soon.

Hi,I am also all or nothing person in everything in life,a big struggle.But overeating your sleeve should really just not happen right now.You are still healing. You can do this.It is hard for the first couple of months.Then it gets easier. Good luck

That slice and a half is to much. The thing is this.You should at this stage be weighing and /or measuring your food.You havent really learnt proper portion sizes this early on out. Just some advice,and as they say,take it,leave it,do with it what you want..lol..but cut the bread right out for now.Replace it with Protein.Measured portions.2 oz at most at a time I would say is quite enough for a meal or snack.For now,you dont need the crackers either.Focus on protein first and then a little veggies. Why get discouraged?Make the change now.Your capacity is still very little food and it is still very possible to change the way you eat.Believe me if I say,later on it becomes quite a lot harder. The sad truth is no one but ourselves can make these changes for us.For some of us it stays a daily struggle but one worth struggling.Dont try to win the war today.Win todays battle.Some days we might lose but that is quite normal.As long as the wins are a lot more you should win the war in the end. Dont stuff yourself too full.Rather eat little bits 6 times a day.It is not worth having gone through all the hassle of getting surgery just to set yourself up for failure. i am not trying to sound harsh but the earlier on we learn to accept the truth about our new stomach,the easier it is to lose weight and to maintain in future. Let us know how you are doing.

Hi,for the eyes that feels strained.Have your Vitamin A checked.I had to fight my dr about this as they kept saying its my age and I should just get glasses.After surgery I started feeling a change in my eyes.Everyone thought I was struggling to accept the fact that I am 45 and often people have to get glasses at this age. It so happens that my vit A bottomed out and was super super low when he finally gave in and tested it.I have to take quite high dosage of Vit A now and will retest end of the month.

Just one more suggestion.Some people keep cut veggies around to snack on.I feel like Im on diet if I do that.I keep strips of cooked chicken or veal or stirfry beef close as that fills me up and satisfies me when I have that sudden "want" to eat that I sometimes just cannot resist. And I know we shoudlnt snack,but when Im stressed I do.But I snack on carb free unprossed Proteins and sugarfree popcicles if I have to. Keep it up and figure out what works best for you!

And Im down 128.2 pounds.Weighed in at 168.8 pounds today.Only 4 pounds from my dr's goal.Not too bad if I might say so myself...lol Am still all over the place with the eating at the moment trying to find my "normal" again but plodding along which still seems to work for me. I will start exercising.Ok,I dont even believe myself anymore.But I should,I know.Still playing squash twice a week though. Have revised my goal for myself to 154 pounds.70kg's or maybe 69.8 will be even better...lol.I might take my time getting there though or then I might just decide to seriously low carb for 4 weeks and drop all of it in a month (lost 14.6 pounds from mid November to mid December and 6 from Mid Dec till now) I can be done but is it important to do it so fast at this point?I am going to wait with PS till sometime later this year so there is no rush now. Things I need to work on. 1. Exercise 2.water.I dont drink water.I drink tea with milk.Lots and lots of it.I need to drink water. 3.vitamins.I need to have my labs done and take my multi every day with the extra vit A and C Ok,thats it for now.

Hi If you look at my blog earlier,I lost around 7 pounds at most every month.Then I said whatever and decided to eat what I enjoy.Started buying chicken breast,veal and beef stirfry meat.I lightly floured it and shallow fried it in a wok with olive oil.With this I also fried some onion and capsicum,lots, and found myself eating this ALL THE TIME.LOTS of it.At least 250g per day.Some days more.I also went back to full fat milk and use loads in my 5 cups of tea per day.Another thing I did was add 2 dolchi letche (spelling incorrect) cappuchinos per day.Full fat.I upped my vitamins and voila,dropped a load of weight with breaded fried proteins.Worked for me!But I wasnt aiming to lose much at all before the holiday as I made my new years goal in November so I didnt feel pressured to lose.Maybe thats why I did.Bought all my clothes in November (for the holiday) and they were to big even before we left..lol Started asking myself why this happened which lead me to do some research into fat.My carbs were easily 20 from the milk and another 30 from the flour.My fats were up to who knows what.I now follow a full fat,50 carb,lots of protein plan and even now,after the holiday,I am dropping steadily.My whole family is back on full fats and the food is tastier than ever before.I have come to the conclusion that we need fat.Healthy fat.Sugar is my enemy,not fat and not complex carbs. One other thing.We also ate a lot of spicy food then.Have a student from India staying with us now and she's teaching me to cook Indian.They use loads of fat as well.I think the spicy food made me eat less as well.Who knows. It still scares and amazes me to eat like this.I expect to gain every day when I weigh but I am actually losing about .3 per day now.I deliberately slow this down as I am only 3 pounds from goal and dont know what I will do once Im at goal.So Im stretching this out a bit..hehehe! Maybe just try something different.Food,the right kind though,that you never eat.Spicy food.Caffine.More fish,more meat. Dont rush yourself.I causes stress that makes us want to eat.You have come so far already an people dont really see how much we have lost,just that we have lost.It was pressure to lose the first 96, now enjoy losing the last 20.I cN even laugh at the scale when I get on it 22:00 in the evening and it is 3 pounds heavier than in the morning.Previously it freaked me out. Good luck for the last 20.