Hello all!
Let me tell you a bit about why I'm here. I haven't talked to my doctor yet at all about my interest in the gastric surgery, but I have my physical on Thursday next week. I'm 5'3" and weigh 250lbs, and 25 years old. I was always chunky in middle and high school but always was able to keep under 200lbs.my biggest problem when I was younger was my breasts. I was a size B in 4th grade and 38DD by 7th. I remember asking my mom at 13 when I'd be old enough to do something about them. Long story short, at 16 I was a size 42H and had a breast reduction.
I was quite confident in myself after this, being about 190 lbs and having a 36C chest was pretty nice. For a while. I grew more after my surgery, but was still content for a good while.I slowly began gaining weight around the age of 18 despite my quite active lifestyle (I worked 3 jobs _1 including construction and wood splitting, and enjoyed being outdoors). I knew my reading habits were poor and just left it at that. When I became pregnant at 20 I was about 215 lbs. I became a little more health conscious and quit smoking. I lost weight for the first 6 months with very little effort, it was great! I looked amazing when I was pregnant, and ended up being only 200lbs at 9 months. I went down to about 175 after my daughter was born, I was ecstatic! I continued with my lifestyle changes yet my body didn't so much agree with me. I slowly gained more weight and reached 250lbs last year. I began to have increasing health problems and stressors in my life that contributed to depression and a realization that I was never a healthy weight, and I truly saw myself in the mirror for the first time as someone with a problem. I've become disgusted with myself, intimidated by healthier looking women and men, and ashamed to be around others.
There is a history of obesity, diabetes, cancer, back problems (herniated discs and spondylolisthesis) and heart problems in my family and I see all of that in my future. I've picked up smoking again to help with the stress, anxiety and fear, which makes everything worse. I've begun to have nerve pain in my legs + lower back, and I was recently diagnosed with celiac. My knees, ankles, hips, and back constantly hurt which has made it difficult to work out the way I used to, which is discouraging.
I don't know where else too turn. I see myself going downhill and I need to stop it. So I'm considering this to keep myself alive and healthy for my daughter and myself. Knowing that I might not be here for her when she's older is heartbreaking to say the least.
So here is my first step toward a very long and hard journey.
