ajustice

Nice to meet u!

You look wonderful! Way to go! Plus looking at your before and after pic...u look happier!

great pic!!!!

I'm back. Feeling for the most part a bit normal part of myself. I'm having a harder time getting back on track with dietary intake. I have a lot of emotional eating temptations right now. I somehow have managed to lose a pretty big chunk this last month at least weight wise. My belly is starting to go back down which for me is a relief in more ways than 1. Still recording my fitness pal food logs but I really wouldn't want anyone seeing what all I'm having. I'm now 14lb away from my personal goal after weighing this morning and it's the biggest positive I feel right now. My surgeon had set a bit wider if a goal but I had a number in mind I thought would make me pretty thrilled. Missed y'all. Hope y'all are all doing well

Well here is my update. I finally feel emotionally ready to share it with u guys. I found out at my appt Mon that I have lost the babies. It was probably the worst day of my entire life. I can't even put words to how the last few days have been. I had hope to be able to pass them naturally and that has not happened..and my dr told me could possibly be more difficult at 10 weeks. I go today for my d&c. It's definitely not what I wanted or even planned. I'm finally in a phase I'm starting to feel some what better and can hold my head up without crying nonstop. I've basically avoided all of my friends and even my family. I just couldn't handle the pity and words they would feel they were obligated to tell me. It makes no sense to me and I don't think it ever will. It's so hard to come from 2 babies and seeing tiny heartbeat to having nothing. At this point I'm just wanting to work through my grief. There will be no more babies as my husband and I just don't feel we can do this again. This is our 2nd miscarriage together and my 4th total. It's hard to swallow a crackhead can do it, a 14year old girl can do it..and so many other that don't want their children or the ones who abuse them. I have no answers and it hurts to even think about it too much. At this point I'm trying to do as my husband keeps suggesting and focus in on the positive. It's hard to see and feel right now but there is some there. I do have a beautiful and wonderful 10year old who is the light of my life and I have love of a wonderful man. I want to try to focus in more on myself. Continue this journey I started and try to max it out to the most. That's all I want right now...to feel ok. I want to thank y'all for all the love and support. You guys are the most amazing friends I could ask for. I will try to get back in touch with u guys when this is all over. If u have a moment and time for a extra prayer..I could really use it today.

Congrats on your journey! Best thing I've ever done for myself. I had responded to your prev post about South MS. I'm from there but out of the area now. My family still lives there and I miss home. Keep in touch if u would like. I would love to talk to someone back home at times.

I'm from that area born & raised..unfortunately I'm military and out if the area right now in nw FL miss home so much! Good luck!!

I'm scared I will be quiet large! My son was a preemie that came at 31 weeks so I think that Ramps up the anxiety.

Way to go!!!! Gotta make u feel amazing!!

i don't blame u one bit. It's scary what u have been through!

So...check this out.... It's really starting to feel real now!!

i really should!! My attention span is so short tho I usually just try to get caught up

Glad to hear everyone is overall doing pretty well..at least in weight loss ways. Hope we all get picked back up health wise. I just started checking the forum out again and it really hit me seeing the new oct surgery folks talking now...wow look how far we have come!! A lot of joy,discomfort, frustration, pain, elation at small victories..and look where we are!!! It's amazing and I can't help but think I've had the greatest group of ladies to do this with! Thank y'all! Here's to every more continued success!!

Thank u!!!

Your story is such a blessing!!! Thank u! I'm literally weak with relief. I just wanna keep believing it's all gonna be ok. I just wasn't ready last week to let go and thank god above he gave me the strength to continue. I thought I wasn't going to live through this!

Premiering this week...... 2 sacs for 2 babies!!!! Baby A...my little gummy bear with the cutest beating heart!!! God is good!!!!

Ok my friends..after what was possibly the worst and lowest 10days of my life I have news. They were able to find a baby today and a heart beat!!!! It's a miracle!! Not only that they found another sac! Twins!!!! They can't tell me much of anything about baby b. Apparently my uterus is so badly tilted they can't see anything really or even if the baby is developing in there. After all the pain and stress of the last week and seeing just how God is in Control I cant give up! I am praying God is going to take care of baby b! I'm overwhelmed a bit I think. Just knowing there is life in there where as a week ago they gave me pretty much no hope!! I thank God I listened to my heart and body and didn't go and do the d&c he wanted me to do on fri. I know He is able and I am trusting and believing. While my husb is so happy we know we have one baby with a little beating heart in there he is shocked speechless. He could only say he just doesn't understand how last week was a ghost town and this week there's 2! I have no idea how I can support 2 babies as I can barely eat or keep much down right now but I am not going to get as concerned about this part just yet. I just know miracles happen! Thank u all for the love and support u have shown me!

I promised u guys I would give u am update so I am. It's totally devastating at this point but tomorrow I have labs just to confirm what the dr is saying. It's a miscarriage. As of right now looks like fri I am having a d&c. I have to stop all of my blood thinner. I wish things would have turned so so much different and Idk it didn't. I have no answers why I would after all these years get pregnant to just have another loss. I'm having a really hard time dealing with this. While a part of me wants to hold out some hope against all hope..I know in my mind it's futile. There was nothing again today on us. With my lab numbers what they are he said there should have been a sight of something at least 5k points ago. At this point I just want it over and to have peace. I don't think I'm ever gonna get over this and this is it for me. 4 losses is all I can handle. I can't go through this again. Crackheads can do it and 14year old girls can do it..so many unwanted children out there and I who could give a child a loving stable home..am not good enough. I will never understand this. Thank you all for the love and support and prayers. It's truly meant a lot to me. I don't know if I will really be on here anytime soon. Too much is overwhelming me. We are also putting our house in the market tomm. It's just too much right now.

You guys mean the world to me. The encouragement and prayers mean a lot to me. We have had a pretty calm and restful weekend. I've finally had the most hope I've had since we found out. I haven't given up and I'm still praying. I thank u so much for all the prayers. I will let you guys know as soon as I can mon what we find out.

Thanks..I love you guys!

Thought I'd update y'all. Last night was pretty awful. After a scare with them thinking I had a ectopic preg they were then able to rule that out. They didn't find a baby or heartbeat. They did see a gestational sac. At this point it's either my body ovulated later than my lmp would indicate or it's a blighted ovum where the pregnancy progressed but the baby didn't. Go back mon hoping for some sign Of hope. Pain is a bit better since the treatment for dehydration. Prayers please. If I lose thus baby will be my 4th and I just don't think I will be able to come back from that.

Thank y'all. Still waiting. I'm getting pumped with fluids right now I was pretty dehydrated. I haven't got the labs back yet or not that they told me. I was told I was going to US but haven't went yet. Just scared but Hope it's not much of nothing. Thanks. I could really use the prayers. I'm scared.