goddessblaze

i told my husband, son and bff, i made the mistake of telling some of the women on the AF base i live on, which cause be big : your gunna be skinner than me fit", my mother hates the idea she thinks through yoga and Paleo Diet all my weight will fall off, so I am keeping it to myself. until of course the weight starts to really come off then I will have to tell people.. Oh and my Roller Derby Coach knows and that it..

'yeah, you made it to the losing side,,, brethe deep and keep walking.. so proud and happy for you!!!

i will be lifting you up in my prayers tonight,. and i wish you the best...

Hi Goddess Blaze name is Leilani... it is nice to meet you.. thank you so much for any and ALL you help and any direction you can point me to.. I truly do need it..

Today I packed my bag for the hospital, b/c I refuse to wear a hospital gown. I will go and get my pedi and hair done in the AM , and small mani as you cant wear nail polish to surgery. I spoke to the Pre-op RN today and went over all my med HX, and of course they need to come in 8am Wed for blood work and ekg, which I have already had done, but it is their xtra safe protocal, so be it... other then that, I made a list of the things i need and I am going to have my husband go to GNC and pick up the Liquid Multi Vit for me and then go to the commisary on base and buy SF Jello and stuff like that when I am in the hospital. Im leaving the cleaning to him and my 17yr old son.. lol

To everyone that had surgery today, I wish you the best of luck, i push this date off, as some of you know.. the reason.. So i do wish ALL of you a well wishes and know a special angel was with you today.. (my aunt ginny) I am glad I took the advice of everyone on here and push the date to 9/13, as my heart has been heavy, with the tributre to my uncle on CBS PATS vs. TITIANS gams yesteday and then my aunt 1yr today my hearts is just heavry with sorrow, I am hoping My surgery BUDDIES come online soon.... haven't heard much from anyone going on 9/13?

Prayers..stupid phone...lol

Don't be nervous..prayers going up...good luck..

ok, everytime I go to the store to try to get vitamins I get LOST and overwhemled..what is everyone else buying? I dont have any of the post op clear liquid foods in my house for after surgery yet, the only thing I can think of right now is surgery is on Thursday, I need to color my hair , get a pedicure, manicure and dye my hair and oh yeah get my eyebrow done.. why? b/c whay happens if if I die during surgery, I dont want to look like crap when my family has to see me.. WTF is wrong with me... OMG!! am i stressed or what..

Good luck..prayers and well wishes..

Rawr..I'm sorry..it will get better, I know just how you felt not that it helps as I'm still on my diet and I'm very tired but the headacheare going away and the feeling hungry is to.plus I'm losing more weight. Good luck, stay focus and know that we are all here if you just need to vent.. :-)

Bucket List: Run 1.5miles, 50 pushup, 50 sit up with my husband for his PT Airforce Test training EVERDAY Wear a 2 pc swim suit TO THE BEACH POLE DANCE Be a Jammer not a Blocker (roller derby) Wear SKINNY JEANS, come on just one pair....lol Fit into all the clothes in my closet Stay fit and healthy Show my family this was the right choice for "me"

you can do this, I have faith in you... doing forget yummy sugar free jello....

is a song title from the movie "seven pounds" and describes how I feel one most days, I just wish it would let go of me. Well in some ways it has,, I got the call today that I have been approved for surgery. I have gone with RY, as i feel the LBand with not give me the effects I needs and want. Pre -op appt 8/31/2012 10:30am, Surgery 9/13/2012.. 5'7 1/2 , 240 , 41yrs old, and have OA of the knees, kidney stones, major depressive disorder, anixity, OCD . I think I am very lucky to say I dont have sleep apena, HTN, type2, comorbities, yet i found this to be a reason why I needed to have this surgery done, before I get them. I found even though I work out 5 days a week at a boot camp style system and have a personal trainer and i do roller derby, I find alot of the things I cant no do because of my knees and the weight I carry. Plus I go back and forth on diets. I also have a 17yrs type1 diabietic son (dx in 2009). I joke around ALOT about my weight and ebery thingks i should go in to stand up.. but deep down inside, i think when i have to sit down to put on my shoes, or im out of breath walking 18 holes of golf it makes me sick inside.. I hate asking my husband to buckle the strap on my high heels, or help me up because my knees hurt. I would like to not have to lay in bed with ice or heat on my back or knees every night after I do something like dance, workout,or better yet i havent been able to skate due to a tailbone/coccyx injury 3 weeks ago.. I am in the medical field and have my MA,EMT, PCT. so I know about the surgery. I am a organ donor and and have discussed with the doctor is something was to happen to me and i was not to survive the surery what I want done, I think he was a little taken back from that conversation, but i guess working in the ER does that to you. I will continue to blog as much as I can, right now my real thought is.. how thin is too thin? my husband is deploying and wont be here for oct to april. so he will come home to someone totally thinner wife, will he like that? also COFFEE, yikes.. i should start to cut down.. Please excuse the typos, this is the 1st blog i have ever wrote and i have know idea what I am doing or were the spell check thing is and NONE of my words are underling in RED,,, wth,,, lol, where is my son when i need him.