KeeWee

Wow, this was one of my fears. I'm sure it's not all on the weightloss, if you've been married that long with a family with this man, there must be other issues for this not to be the first time.
It doesnt make him a monster, humans make mistakes and bad choices, also sometimes we just do things in the heat of the moment on impulse. Another thing can be when a man is use to being the center of attention in your life and then you begin to pay more attention to yourself and your needs and goals, they can sometime stray...no excuse but work on understanding why and what he was looking for and dont throw away that man that you invested your time and emotions into....seek the counseling together preferably and see how it goes.
But this is no random guy, this is your husband, show him why he has an exceptional wife by giving him the chance to redeem himself, everyone deserves another chance but get to the root of the problem....Good Luck, I've been with my husband for 18 years and I fear him not liking me smaller, he loves my size but says he supports the decision. But this is for me and he will show his true colors when the time presents itself.

UPDATE>>>>>> We are going to therapy!

Wow...
As someone who almost gave up on my marriage years ago, went to counseling and 18 years later is happily married to the same guy, I just gotta say, slow down!
Things might not be as you think.
Time for a conversation, an honest one to figure out what's going on.
Hope things work out for you.

am sorry....i hope it turns out its not what it appears to be

I spoke with him before I posted, this isn't the first time. And I don't feel he is remorseful it is what it is! His loss!

You can now proceed to jump up and down around the room..... Congrats

Down 75 pounds since pre op diet!!! Down 56 pounds since dec 10 surgery date!!! Yay go me

I am anxious to hear the responses....I have been concerned about this myself.

Well the pouch/tool is still your stomach and as an organ not used it will continue to shrink and cause weight loss if you eat a small amount and your stomach get a use to it. I personally wanna eat less but not like a baby bird...
Your tool will learn to fit your eating habits like a glove, so it's important to maintain a healthy diet but honestly..if you can eat more now than most, it doesn't mean you have or will fail at any time it may just mean that your new stomach will learn you and you just may not have the results many others see but to me, you may have it better if u can still eat a somewhat decent amount and continue to lose, just may be a bit slower and take more time.
Sounds like you still win as long as your healthy. I have a friend who had the surgery as a study with no pre op classes, no weight loss requirement, no pre op diets and she never even got the post op nutritional classes that would have helped her be more successful. See she had a huge weight loss but not as much as she wwould've. but she said No matter what she ate, she lost consistently. Maybe this is why all surgeons have different recommendations at different stages....maybe because it doesn't matter what u eat cuz your gonna lose it anyway! (A girl can dream)
But in this case, the best advice to follow is that of the image you'd like to possess. So I LOVE bariatric.com for its community and our diverse neighbors and their opinions....as radical as they become!!

I think it is absolutely ridiculous to put someone through a supervised diet prior to surgery for 3 or 6 months. I sort of understand the logic...wanting to see if you can adhere...follow rules...discipline yourself...see how serious you are. At the end of the day if dieting and working out alone worked....im sure none of us would be here. Ive personally struggled with my weight since I was 9 years old.
My coworker had to do the exact same thing she chose a different insurance plan than I did. Thankfully all my doc needed to confirm was my BMI and that I was morbidly obese. Years ago I had a situation like yours and I became so frustrated I gave up. You have made it this far dont give up. Like some one mentioned above try cutting your carbs as low as you can go. If you can get your body in ketosis ( burning fat for fuel) you might be able to drop 5-10 pounds in the next week or two...just to get you over the hump so you can reach your target pre-surgery weight. I lost like 40 lbs in about 3 months doing south beach.

Keekee
Girl I definitely understand what you are experiencing. With surgery months away (feels like years) I feel as if the cravings for every bad food choice have gotten stronger. I was told to not gain another pound after I weighed in at 298 but I am definitely doing the exact opposite. I do not know how to get it together. And the whole no cigarettes is a chore in its self...
JUST SLEEVE ME ALREADY!!!!!! Lbvs

I am four months out and my husband got me my favorite chocolates even though I said I didn't want any. When I thought about it I realized he did it out of the kindness of his heart and also knowing I could 'treat' myself over time. So I gladly had one and had another one tonight. A chocolate here and there won't hurt, it's abusing the chocolate, or letting the chocolate abuse you lol.

I swear, I feel like my husband is trying to sabotage me or something. I told him 2 days ago "whatever you do, don't get me chocolates. I can't have any. Don't forget". So what does he do? today he got me chocolates. I said "gee thanks but I can't eat them" and his response was "oh I forgot". Well that's why I reminded you just 2 days ago! UGH!! I have been with him since I was 15 years old (for 15 years now) and in the past he has always tried to sabotage my weight loss efforts. I don't give in to it or him anymore though. I get upset with him. I find myself yelling at him a lot now because it pisses me off that he does this to me. He'll say "you know what sounds good? McDonalds chicken nuggets" and I'll scream at him "YOU KNOW I CAN'T EAT THAT CRAP ANYMORE SO WHY DO YOU EVEN BRING IT UP"?? and he'll act like he forgot that I cant eat that stuff. Um hello I had the surgery 2 months ago, have you not seen what I have been eating in the last two months and how small my portions are? I really don't think he is forgetting. I feel like he does it on purpose and it pisses me off!
In other news, I went out and bought a pair of jeans that are way too small with the hopes that in the near future I'll get to wear them. I hope this helps to motivate me to stay on the straight and narrow.

ReMom13,
The 2 week pre-op liquid diet is to shrink the liver (because a fat person has a fatty liver). Shrinking the liver will make surgery easier because it won't be in the way as much. The 3,6, etc month diet period is a requirement by most insurance companies.

I don't understand the diet before surgery thing...I mean a few days of liquid, yes, but weeks-months? Can someone explain it?

Thanks Kee! Consult was rescheduled due to all that snow we got last week. New appt is this Monday 24th.

I felt the exact same way when I was waiting to be sleeved and having to see a NUT every month. But when I put it all into perspective I understand why they have you wait. They want to see if you can follow instructions because after you are sleeved there are some very specific instructions/rules that need to be followed for your own safety. Hang in there, I know its tough. You'll get through this and on to the next stage (hopefully being sleeved) you'll go.

Keekee, I'm sorry to hear it hasn't been going well for you. What sort of eating plan are you on? If you haven't tried it already, give Atkins a shot. A lot of people get really good results with that. And going full liquid will do it, too. And don't forget your 8 oz of Water...even before surgery Water is important for losing weight.
Congrats on quitting smoking. That's a huge accomplishment.

Using the high Protein mixes with no calories and no sugar would help. On my preop diet I drank 3-4 a day to fight of hunger. I was able to eat as many non starchy veggies as I wanted. The high protein made it easier to be good. I used two kinds from the surgeon's office. Bariatric Advantage and cornerstone. Now I use Syntrax Protein Powder. It took me ten months to go through testing and approval. It is irritating but will be worth it!

I had to drop carbs and cheese to rev up my pre-op loss. Maybe just try not to eat anything that comes from a factory - you won't starve.

Obviously listen to your doctors and specialists, but if you really need to drop the weight in order for a surgery date go on a liquid diet.
Drastic times take drastic measures.
A lot of people have had to do this to get on the calendar.
Good luck.

Hey pretty lady!
I haven't been sleeved yet, and they're not asking me to lose any weight beforehand (not yet anyway...), but I've been kinda trying on my own (again!) to lose a bit before the surgery. It can be difficult trying to keep yourself in check while making sure you're meeting all the requirements on someone else's "checklist." I'm certainly no expert, but cutting out carbs has totally helped. Maybe try to cut out the milk since it sounds like your stomach doesn't like it anyway....you can have cheese w your eggs and get Calcium from there, or maybe even just take a few TUMS or Viactiv calcium chews each day to help with that? And I swear by crystal light. Hate Water, but a little crystal light goes a long way. Good luck. Keep your head up!

Congrats to you and good luck on future successes!!

Eight months and a day ago, I woke up with diabetes, sleep apnea, crazy blood pressure fluctuations, tired, unmotivated and with low self-esteem...even though I didn't know it.
Eight months and a day ago, I followed through with a surgery that most people frown upon and have misconceptions about. They told me not to do it: "consider the risks" they said.
Eight months and a day ago, I told myself "this is the right thing to do, the decisions that make you think hard about are usually the ones that will impact your life the most but they are often for the best."
Eight months and a day ago, I put my life in strangers hands and trusted that in the end I would come out better than I was went I went in.
Eight months and a day ago, I thought it would be hard living the banded life: "what about all the foods I'll miss...what if I slip...what if I am one of the ones the band doesn't work for...what if...what if...what if... shhhhhh! I had to quiet my mind. The greatest fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. I was tired and lonely - I just didn't know it.
Eight months and a day ago, I arrived on the other side; floating on the awesome knock-out punch, unaware of the gut-wrenching pain soon to follow. It was worth it.
Eight months and a day ago, I was me - just not at my best.
Eight months and a day ago, my life changed dramatically. It's strange how it has all unfolded, I've enjoyed the victories both large and small. I've enjoyed getting to know and communicate with people who share this lifestyle with me; congratulating many, consoling others - while feeling the need to put some in check at times, but always enjoying the sense of community nonetheless.
Eight months and a day ago, I didn't think I would be a pound away from the lowest weight I've been since before I was a teen.
Ain't the band grand?

I know this is the wrong section but it’s a unlocked section being told the sections are password protected I am logged in its asking for my password then telling me that’s not correct and I can’t post or even look at them sections now!
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