Sofficial

I want to apologize because what I'm seeking advice on doesn’t have anything to do with wls, but I didn’t have anywhere else to turn. About a year ago my daughter was fondled by my ex boyfriend of six years. So my daughter and I went to the police station and filed a report, he was eventually arrested and is still incarcerated on these charges. Fast forward to February of this year. My daughter is at a new school and one day she comes to me and says that here Violin instructor is constantly touching her butt( in a not so obvious way) and and he stands too close and he's making her feel very uncomfortable. So I told her that she might still be a little traumatize from what happened with my ex and her instructor probably means no harm, but however I will talk with him about this. I went to the school and told him that my daughter doesn’t want anyone to know but she has been fondled by someone who was very close to her and and she is still a bit on edge, with that being said please give her some space because she feels that you are touching her inappropriately. He was very nice about it and agreed that he would give her space. The very next day he told my daughter that I told him about what happened to her and that he wouldn't do that to her,ect... About a week later my daughter came home crying hysterically saying that it has gotten worse he is still touching her and she feels he is doing this on purpose now. I told her that I would request some time off work and speak with the counselor or she could go ahead and speak to her without me. Because she was tired of this situation and did not want to wait any longer she went ahead and spoke to the counselor alone. She told me when she brought this situation to the counselor there was no discretion at all, there was another student close by, there was teachers coming in and out reading her statement and she was very upset about this. When I brought this to the counselors attention she said that there was only three staff members that read the statement, which was the principle ,asst principal and and some other appropriate person. So they contacted the state and they did an investigation, they talked to other students, most of the students parents did not want their child involved so they wouldn't allow them to speak with the investigators. The teacher was suspended while the investigation went on. I was not aware of this until last night but during this investigation word got out that my daughter was the reason for the teacher being suspended. This teacher is one of the students favorite and most of the students were calling her her a liar, and they began bullying and antagonizing her. One day she was sitting in her piano class and her piano instructor made an announcement that the student that who brought these allegations on had abuse problems at home, now let me remind you every one at the school pretty much knows by now my daughter is the one who brought this on. What she went through with my ex, she really didn't want anyone to know, my own family doesn’t even know. She said she didn't want anyone looking at her differently. The only reason I told him was because I figured he would make a special effort to keep his space. Fast forward to last week, my daughter told me the instructor was back. Now my daughter or I was never contacted and told that he would be back, we did not get any kind of heads up. I spoke with my daughters best friend last night and she told me that everyone at the the school is bullying my daughter, calling her a liar and wild rumors are being spread that she has been molested or is being beaten. When she tries to sit at the lunch table with her class mates they would tell her to move they don't want her sitting with them. My heart is so broken right now I am sitting here in tears, knowing that everyday I sent my daughter to that school thinking that my daughter was protected by the staff and all this time she was being tortured and humiliated, on top of what she has already been through. I believed the asst Principal when she told me that all of this would be kept confidential and trusted when and if they let him come back that they would at least keep him away from her or take some kind of protocol. She say he glares at her when she walks by and is constantly coming in one or more of her classes. I fee so horrible, I know there’s only so much I can do being a single parent of three, working and going to school, but I can't help to feel that I dropped the ball somewhere. I'm going up to the school today but I wanted to get you guy's input on this first, because my emotions are so all over the place I can't really think clearly and I want to be able to find the right words when I go to the school today and not just go crazy with yelling and screaming.

I've been doing very well with my sleeve. It’s said on this site all the time but I'm say it as well...Getting the sleeve was the best decision I've made and I wouldn't change anything. I had a positive outlook on the entire situation from the beginning and I truly believe that helped. I started out at 262lbs, I lost 15lbs from doing the pre op diet, and today I weight 156lbs so total I’ve lost 106lbs. I started in a size 22 now I’m in a size 8. No, I did not work out, however I did change my eating habits, I completely gave up sugar and only do sugar substitute or sugar free. I do Protein first and I eat a lot of Protein Bars, I can’t stand the shakes they make me nauseous. In the beginning this was all like a fantasy or a dream, but now I’m actually living it and it feels wonderful.

I just began my journey in August of this year and I have a six moth waiting period. I am driving my family crazy from talking about this surgery so much. I think it would be a good idea to have a buddy who is going through the same thing to support one another. My family is supportive but there's nothing like having someone who can relate by your side too.

Miss Mac I am SO SORRY for what you guys went through, my heart definitely goes out to you. I don't think I have enough documentation for a lawsuit but I'm gonna try anyway. I actually met with a therapist last week for my daughter because we're going to trial soon and I wanted to make sure she was mentally prepared and able to go through with reliving that experience. She meets with her tomorrow, so that's good. I had her stay home from school today and she wont be back for the remainder of the year which is only two weeks. I went to the school and they act like they was shocked that she was going through that and apologized for not letting me know that he was back at the school. That was not good enough for me and I'm filing a complaint with the Board of Education and I'm going to find an attorney. I cant thank you guys enough for your wonderful advice, compassion and exposure. It was hard making the decision to post here, sometimes I find it best to get input from people that you don't know personally, as they will have an unbiased and far more honest opinion. Thank you so much for taking a break from the weight loss forums to be there for me in my time of need, it means more than you know.

Yes, you're right I’ve definitely sought out professional help too, but I was just looking for personal advice as well, as it can be just as beneficial. Thanks!

Well at the time when I decided to tell him I didn't think he was a predator, I just thought my daughter was being a little paranoid because of her circumstances, however after talking to him I kind of regretted telling him that. As far as the media, I thought of that too but I really don't want my daughter exposed.

If it's not too late I would like to go.

I was just wondering this same thing, I'm a little over a month post op and already starting to gain a little confidence, but still very nervous about getting back out in the dating scene.

I'm not at the point were I can eat whatever I want just yet, I'm only in phase four surgery was 2/19. But I do wish I would've had a bigger food funeral. I would look at my children eat things like salad and wish I could eat that too. But today I just started phase 4 and this is the phase were soft veggies and dark green lettuce are introduced. Can you believe I'm really never hungry I only want to eat when I see others eat. So no one is in the office but me so I had to force myself to eat the salad I brought to work today and I didn't really eat that lettuce I wanted oh so bad, I just pretty much ate the protine (crab meat, eggs and cheese) out of it. But yeah there are some foods that I "think" I miss and right now it's pickles.

I am on my pre-op liquid diet. My surgeon requires that I drink a minimum of five Protein shakes a day, the dietitian gave me a list of approved drinks and they all vary from 15g to 30g. So if I drink the Premier shake which is 30g I'm getting double the amount of protein than if I was drinking Atkins advantage which is 15g. I cannot STAND the taste Premier and I have a hard time drinking them, they taste like medicine and I have to drink them because I went out and bought three cases of them from Sams before I even tasted them. So anyway, I have only been drinking about 3 per day and I've been feeling horrible about it, because I've wanted this surgery for soooo long that I feel honored and privilege to get it, so therefore I want to do my very, very best on this journey. So I've been getting about 90g of protein a day with the Premier Shakes, is this good enough because if I were drinking five of the 15g shakes I would only be consuming 75g. I called my bariatric center yesterday and the nurse told me that I NEED to drink a minimum of five shakes or else my liver won't shrink and that just doesn't make since because as I stated some shakes has higher protein than others. I think the nurse was just trying to scare me into drinking five fer day. I didn't tell her that I was drinking 30g shakes, all of what I'm posting here didn't dawn on me until this morning. So my question is how much protein should I aim for per day? I know post-op I have to aim for 60g, but I'm talking about pre-op.

I feel the same way. My daughter had a sleep over this weekend and I didn't feel the urge at all or even feel bad about not being able to eat her cupcakes.

I started my journey in August 2013, and when I was told I had to do a six month supervised diet, it felt like I would never get through those six months. My upcoming surgery was all I talked about, thought about, read about I mean I drove my family crazy. I learnd ssoooo much from this site all the good, bad and ugly. I got sleeved 2/19/14. As far as how I did on my six month diet,not so good I acually gained five pounds. The only thing I cut out was soda because I rarley drank them anyway. More than anything I wish I would've tried protien shakes before hand, because when it was time for me to do my liquid diet I could not find a shake that I could tolerate and I only had one week so I really didn't get any protien in on that diet.

The bariatric clinic just sent off my paperwork on Monday. I am a little nervous, and can't wait to see if I'm approved. I'm gonna call my insurance Friday to check the status. Can't wait to get my journey started!!!! Fingers Crossed!

I can't believe it's finally here, I'm a bit nervous, didn't think I would get nervous. The nurses are so nice, that make me feel a little better. I'm all hooked up to my IV and waiting to go to the back.

Who told you that? If it wasn't a representative at Aetna, then I wouldn't worry too much about it, and three pounds isn't much, 3lbs of weight gain could be a number of things. I'll lose 3lbs if I take some Miralax and have a good dump. LOL

I hate that, my close friend is like that. She has been skinny all of her life and she believes's that all I have to do is push back from the table. Its not that simple

Wow!!! You go girl! You look GREAT, congratulations

I'm 4 days into my pre op diet, and I have not cheated with food not once,because food is not my problem. I am cheating however with the protein shakes, I can't stomach another shake and I literally get nauseous from the very smell of them. I tried adding syrups and water to thin it out. NOTHING over powers the taste magnesium. What will happen if I don't drink them, will my liver not shrink.

I don't know why I can't have tomato soup. The dietitian gave me a list of approved food and drinks and it just said clear broth. And I tried Muscle Milk and I can tolerate that. And I'm gonna look for EAS.

Wow I'm glad you post this, I'm getting sleeved on the 19th too and wondering the same thing.

At least you can have tomato soup. All I can have is Protein drinks, Clear Liquids, Jello, and sugar free popsicles. It will be over before you know it.

Well said But I hate when I tell other overweight people and they say something like you can do it on your own, I've lost xyz pounds doing this, that and the other. I always look at them like Yeah and that's working very well for you.

This is so nice, I love it!! Gonna send it to my mom and sister. Neither of them them qualify for the surgery, but they both struggle with their weight and they really been going hard at trying to tackle their weight issues now that I'm so close to my surgery date. So this would be helpful for all of us.

Or maybe she decided to to stop at 190 on purpose. Maybe that was her goal weight, to lose just enough to stay healthy. She did make a statement saying that she hopes to get under 200lbs. A lot of overweight celebrities feel they will lose fans if they lost their weight.