CrissTillClear

All my life I've been heavy. Of course like so many of us, I attribute the weight to family, environmental, or stressors as the root or cause. My surgical weight loss journey began with the band in 2006. I was torn between gastric banding and bypass surgery. The deciding factor for me was the gastric band's post attribute of being REVERSIBLE. Many in my family had gone through with the bypass surgery but still had issues or other factors to which I felt if only they could remove the procedure. Although weight loss took longer, I did get down to 170 lbs from pre- Op weight of 301 lbs. I was so excited, but the problems ensued. I had to return to the hospital for bowel constriction surgery which also led to my surgeon finding out I had a hernia. The consistent issues had me to gain weight, where I plateaued at 200lbs.

Now 7 years later and still in the 200 -206lbs range, I've completed the Gastric sleeve, having the band removed. I'm 2 days out of surgery and still I'm not sure how I feel about the process. My concerns range from IF I lose to AFTER I lose. One of the bigger issues I've had was my body is so flabby now I just knew I'd be a shoe in for some type of post op body conturing surgery. Since it's considered cosmetic, it's not covered under my insurance and I just don't have the financial backing for me to pay out of pocket.

Also, just as a side note, I don't even feel like I've had some additional procedure done. All I know is the gastric band has been removed. I don't feel the port or the tightness of the constriction that I've learned to work with for over 6 years. Another observation, I'M HUNGRY... now maybe it's mental or physical, but nevertheless I'm hungry. Emotional eating for me is a staple with all the stressors I have going on in my life right now and I'm finding it difficult to deal without that particular crutch.

Am I losing my mind with the concerns about body conturing surgery? Does anyone else go through the whole emotional eating heavily and mourning it's loss? Any support and care would be very much appreciated!