Kindle

My real choice wasn't listed. I drank several cups of real coffee everyday preop. I weaned down to decaf for 2 months preop. I could not tolerate coffee for about 3-4 months postop (too harsh for my new sleeve). Now I'm back to drinking several cups of coffee/day but stuck with the decaf. Never noticed any difference in my energy levels.

My uncle swears by coconut oil for scars. He started using it even years after his knee replacement and the scars faded significantly. I haven't tried it because my neck fusion scar and VSG scars are pretty faded on their own.

My avatar is correct right now, but earlier today, JJinWA's avatar with the yellow and purple flowers was displayed as my avatar. Is this some kind of matching game?!

...You're right, I could have used different wording, but the same character flaws that make me honest and open also blocks the PC filter others possess. I don't sugar coat things. And I do apologize for using the BS reference. I need to remember that what is acceptable behavior and conversation in my real life, may not be OK for everyone. I reread my post as I never called anyone a liar. And as for dishonesty, any response to the question of weight loss that doesn't include surgery is a half-truth (half-truth noun\-ˌtrüth\: a statement that is only partly true and that is intended to deceive people). According to Merriam Webster dishonesty is a synonym for deception. "I had surgery, and I eat healthier and I exercise" is the true answer to how we lost weight. There is no arguing that all of those things were necessary for us. Omitting any of these points is misleading and the listener is deceived into believing something that isn't the whole truth. If you don't wish to disclose your surgery, for whatever reason, "that's personal and I prefer not to talk about it" or "it's none of your business" are honest answers. We obviously got very side tracked, because the intent of my OP was to open the discussion of how to address the shame and stigma and negativity many on here may encounter as WLS patients. I feel strongly that being open and talking about it is the best way to eliminate the myths and prejudice that surrounds WLS and obesity. I was embarrassed when I first decided to have surgery. I was disgusted with myself and my lack of discipline to lose it on my own. Talking about it and being open with others helped me get over these negative feelings as well as dispel many myths others had about obesity, WLS, and even traveling to Mexico for surgery. Obviously, many people choose not to disclose and I appreciate your viewpoints and the arguments of why it may not work for some. It's just the deception that bothered me because allowing people to think you lost so much weight the "old fashioned way" perpetuates the idea that WLS is not necessary.

Stevehud, oh boy! You need to check out the thread I started "when you can't even be honest with yourself" in the rants and raves section. I called BS on those that choose to lie about their surgery, and was met with HEATED opposition and resentment. You may find some answers to your question there. But don't use the words lie or dishonest...they don't like that.

Now my avatar is back to normal, but there is a tiny image of a lap band book inserted at the end of my last post.

Ok, so this morning I am an African Amercan woman with glasses and a bluish v-neck shirt. I'm having a serious identity crisis here

Jim1967...I felt the same way at the "highlight" of my weight loss. For about 5-6 months I was being asked about my weight loss every single day from clients and friends that were seeing me for the first time since surgery. The same questions over and over got old (not unlike the "stall" questions on here ). But I'm now seeing fewer and fewer people for the first time post-WLS, so the questions and comments have slowed down. Now my surgery is mostly just old news and we all have other things to talk about.

Some of my favorite frozen Protein treats.... Syntrax Matrix vanilla powder + milk + Mio tangerine drops = dreamsicle Premier chocolate + milk = fudgescicle Syntrax nectar lemonade + Syntrax Nectar cherry Muscle Milk red velvet cake + Greek yogurt + milk + Torani caramel syrup Muscle milk cake batter+ Greek yogurt + milk + Torani pumkin pie syrup But really, your imagination is the only thing that sets the limit

Thank you everyone for your replies to my rant....both the likers and the haters. Its nice to see that at least some people understand my frustration with the deception, half truths and shame that surrounds WLS. As for the haters, I guess my perspective and values are just so different from yours that a productive debate is not really possible. It's like trying to have a conversation in two different languages. I cannot atone dishonesty and you are too private to be truthful. Where do we go from there? So please keep the posts coming. there are some really great points on both sides. And for those of you who want to continue to bash me, that's OK, too....I won't be offended or hurt. Like I said before, I don't need acceptance from others to feel good about myself.

That's awesome!

Butterflyhigh...I'm SO sorry for your situation. That's horrible that you are surrounded by such negativity. I continue to be amazed, saddened and disgusted by people and how poorly they treat each other. RJ...I don't see how my upbringing is name calling. It's what made me who I am and I said it to explain the reasoning behind why I feel the way I do. Just a fact of my life. I know my honesty is not "normal", but its the way I live my life. Unfortunately it's not a popular MO. And sure, I've lied in the past...even had a fake ID to get in the bars in college. But I know how I feel when I find that I've been lied to, and I choose not do that to someone else. As I've gotten older I've found that my parent's were actually right. Do I piss people off sometimes by being so open? Yes. (Obviously) Oh well. And I don't have kids, so I've never had to do the Santa/Easter Bunny/ tooth fairy thing.

Go to the bank and empty my savings account.

You are right, I am very blessed to have such overwhelming support (or rather non-judgemental responses) to my surgery. But of course I didn't know how each person would react when I told them. I guess its easier for me to be open about my surgery because 1) I can't lie. I just wasn't raised that way and even telling a little fib or half truth leaves me feeling uncomfortable. And 2) I truly don't care what others say or think about me. If they want to be judgemental or talk about me in gossip circles, that's fine. That's their flaw, not mine. I am confident, strong and don't need acceptance from others to feel OKabout myself. I have dozens, probably hundreds of acquaintances and casual friends, but only a very few close friends. I just see the fakeness in so many people and choose to only keep "genuine" people close to me. Ok, I'm really rambling now. I'll shut up. And please, keep the comments coming. I feel strongly about defending my opinions and I think others should do the same. I don't mind being disagreed with. It's only honesty and respect I demand....and probably why I have a hard time respecting dishonesty.

@@Algae . That is a wonderful story and a great idea of how to "pay it forward" without becoming gossip fodder.

I, too, was inspired by someone else's story. When I first started researching my WLS options, all I knew about was bypass and lap band. I had friends that had both and neither really fit what I was looking for. Then a friend's boyfriend's mom started talking about her upcoming VSG. She told me what she knew about the procedure and the rest is history.... (Ironically she ended up having RNY, but has done very well). There is another girl in her church that was also influenced by her story and had VSG in Mexico a couple months after I did. She's VERY open about her surgery and posts updates on facebook and on a blog she started. I live in a small, conservative, rural, mostly LDS community of about 10,000 people and have been very pleased to see the acceptance all of us WLS patients have experienced.

Bikrchk, I'm with you. The fact everyone knows about my surgery is a big factor in holding myself accountable. Now that I'm in maintenance I know I won't fail because I want to be a good example. And thank you everyone else for your posts. You make very good points. I used to work for a big corporation, so I know about office politics and dealing with "suits". That BS is a big reason why I went back to school for a complete career change in my 30's. And it's a real shame that so many people have friends and family that are unsupportive. I guess it just upsets me that WLS is still such a taboo subject in today's society. Losing weight and being healthy are an aspiration for Americans but the fact that there is a "right" way (excersise, eating healthy) and a "wrong" way (WLS) is just crazy. The choice to tell or not tell is just that and everyone has to do what is best for them. I just think that the only way to help break down the stigma of surgery is for people to hear about our successes rather than repeat the stories about a "friend of a friend that died". And people's reactions may surprise you...hearing the truth could help someone else struggling with their weight. Really, if we can't be supporters of WLS, who will be?

You actually weigh LESS than what your driver's license says.

You're right...everyone has to do what they feel most comfortable with. I Think shame is something that's normal for us to feel, but we shouldn't have to. It's funny the embarrassment thing doesn't happen to me when I talk about my surgery. But it does when someone asks exactly how much I lost. I won't tell them a number because then I am admitting just how much I actually weighed and I am ashamed I let myself get that fat. The funny thing is, it's mostly the guys that want an exact number. I guess girls just have better "scale etiquette" and know better than to ask And congrats on your success. It looks like you are killing this WLS thing!

Congrats! I just looked at my drivers license. I now weigh 30 pounds less than my lie weight (which was almost 70 pounds less than my heaviest), but I don't need to renew for another 3 years. Oh well.

Lexie, All good points. And I'm not talking about shouting it off the rooftops or posting it on social network venues. It's more about the excuses and fibs told when directly asked about our obvious weight loss. I proudly stand up for my decision, but a lot of people don't and I believe there is an element of embarrassment and shame that people aren't admitting to and that isn't being talked about on these forums.

I was transitioning from Pureed to soft foods at 1 month. Greek yogurt, refried beans, Eggs, cream soups with added protein powder, mashed potatoes with added protein powder, tuna, cheese, protein shakes, deviled ham, spam, peanut butter, high protein/whole grain oatmeal, soft cooked veggies, peaches, mangos, bananas. But what does your surgeon's postop diet have planned at 1 month?

I told my whole family and several good friends before my surgery. My work partner also knew. I had nothing but support as well as the usual concern for any type of surgery I would have been having, especially since it was in Mexico. Postop there is no way to hide your weight loss and with the exception of a few clients I don't really like, I've told everyone about my surgery when they ask. Usually it's a brief conversation. Some people want details but mostly we just move on to other topics. Direct honesty has made everything so much easier for me. Telling fibs to everyone I know would leave me feeling very uncomfortable. I cringe when I read all the posts on here from people trying to hide their surgery. I see every inquiry as an opportunity to educate others about WLS. No one benefits and stigmas won't ever disappear if we all keep our "dirty little WLS secret" in the closet. Stand up and be proud of your decision to improve your life!

Never counted, tracked or weighed. Eat when I'm hungry and just until satisfied. I Keep a running tally in my head so I know I'm getting at least 64oz water. Have a large 30-40g protein/fiber smoothie everyday and just eat a healthy, balanced diet of protein, fruits, veggies, and whole grains. However, I also eat deserts, ice cream, alcohol, bread, cake, muffins, chips, potatoes, pasta, and candy in moderation. Easiest "diet" I've ever been on and I've been maintaining at 10 pounds below my goal weight for almost 4 months.

Sorry you have to go through this difficult and unnecessary diet regimen. I still don't get why your surgeon does this because you WILL lose weight after VSG without the addition of a fad diet. Just like Buffer, I've been there done that with the Atkins. Personally, I feel it's important to learn to eat healthy from the start. This new lifestyle is forever, you might as well learn how to make good, healthy choices. The more restrictive a diet plan is, the more likely you will cheat and that sets the patient up for failure (in general) I also don't think the extreme calorie restrictive postop diets make sense, either. If you only eat 600-800 calories, that's what your body will get used to, your metabolism will slow down and it will be much more difficult to lose and or maintain at a "normal" caloric intake for the rest of your life. Sorry for my ramblings, but seeing that a bariatric surgeon doesn't have faith in his own procedure is very weird to me. And obviously I'm not a "professional"....just a successful WLS patient who knows what works for me. Oh, and BTW, even while eating normal food, nothing tasted good to me, I had no appetite, and eating was a very unwelcome chore for about 3-4 months. So I think a lot of that is normal no matter what your postop diet is. Good luck to you...it will get better!