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As of today I am 8 weeks post-op. I have exceeded my goal of reaching my pre-pregnancy weight by christmas. I broke out all of my pre-pregnancy clothes and they all fit perfectly. Soo excited, and so glad I didnt give up on myself and throw them out..accepting myself at 233lbs. As of this passed Monday I now weigh 186lbs. I was sleeved August 8th, 2013. Weighing 216 thanks to a 14 lb weight loss on pre-op diet. (230) I was an old mlae aquaintance at the gym yesterday. My first thought was oh I hope he doesnt see me. I have tried to avoid seeing people that I havent seen since gaining weight from my pregnancy (50lbs) But it dawned on my, I am the same weight now as when I made my grand entrance into a friends wedding wearing a sexy black dress and turned a few heads (including his) I kept on walking kind of in awe at how far I have come in such a short time, and also realizing, that my mind has yet to catch up wih my new body. I am still 230 lbs in my head. But Let me tell you I feel great! I still have a long way to go, But as of today I cant wait for what the future brings. I reread my past blog entries from a few months ago and I was nearly in tears. This is truely the best decision I have ever made for myself. I have had NO issues with food what so ever. I can pretty much eat anything on my approved foods list. I did stall for over 2 weeks once I hot 191lbs. Then I had my AF and afterwards 5 lbs magically. During AF I had an overwhelming urge to graze during the day. I had me very worried that my appetite had increased and I was failing. But after the 5 lb weight loss I realized it was just that TOM. I do have to watch the grazing as i have 2 kids and its very easy to pick at their leftovers, and just snacking in general. I also find that after a meal I dont stay that full for long.. Not hungry but not FULL. I started back at the gym 5 days a week. Only 20 minutes on treadmill and 20 minutes or so of weight training. I found that I was hungrier after doing so much so I decreased my gym to 3 days a week but still try to get in a walk every day. I went to the mall the other day and didnt feel weird walking in regular size stores. I hated the clothes however because they all seem like oversized shirts. Hello,, wheres the tight tuck me in at the waist clothes. So at least I wasnt tempted to spend money.. lol My hubby and I booked an all inclusive getaway without the kids for my birthday February 23rd, 2014. I hope by then I will be at or near my personal goal of 145-150lbs. When we went away on our honeymoon I was 170lbs and felt great. I can only imagine being 145lbs. My next goal for myself is 170lbs which is my wedding weight and will try on my wedding dress! If I can meet this goal by Christmas/New years I will be thrilled. FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE I HAVE FINALLY FOLLOWED THROUGH ON MY NEW YEARS RESOLUTION TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!

I have several grandchildren and have not seen most of them since pre-op. Yesterday I saw my 4 year old grandson MJ. Because of my weight loss and physical therapy, my Fibromyalgia pain has decreased so I was able to bend down to his level. MJ screamed, "YaYa you're my height, I can see your eyes". He then hugged me and said, "YaYa I can hug all of you!" :wub:

So I woke up this morning, SUPER glad that yesterday is DONE! I was looking at the calendar and I saw the date, I then began to think. As of this past Sunday I am 2 months out, 8 weeks people, from my surgery date and I have lost almost 30 pounds! Amazing, right? Well...yes it is, but then I thought, "Woman, you need to zip your lips the next time you think of complaining the scale isn't moving!". RIGHT?!!!
 
In those very thoughts I thought of how amazing it is to even be able to vocalize that I have LOST, not gained, almost 30 pounds!!! It seems like a lifetime ago that I was able to say I even lost 5 pounds, or even 10! Now look at that number!!! I then thought that I have no right to gripe when the scale doesn't move as fast as I think it should, or say what I have been waiting for it to say. Our minds, well my mind anyway, can be a dangerous place and that is why I HAVE to talk positively to myself every minute of the day! Who thought I would ever be able to say in 8 weeks I have LOST almost 30 pounds!!!
 
I guess it's in the moments of reflection that you begin to realize that at times we can become so complacent, so ungrateful for even the smallest victories. I cannot speak for everyone, just for me, and I am a very thankful person, and when I realized that I was getting to the point of not being satisfied with my victories, that is a sad day for me. I read someone else's blog this morning on almost the same exact topic and it just made me think.
 
I'm working on my mind, daily, and this is such a touchy subject with me. But I have to wake up everyday and KNOW that I am not yet where I want to be but I am so much better than the day before.
 
In the person's blog that I read she recounted the obstacles she has overcome, and how she, too, is frustrated with that stupid scale as she is so close to her goal and it is just taunting her. When will we, I, be completely satisfied??? When did I overlook where I came from and open my eyes to now see the real reflection of ME? I'm almost completely off my insulin and I am completely off my oral meds for diabetes, that is a HUGE Victory and if nothing else changes, I am so thankful for that.
 
I've worked hard in my life to really like who I see in my reflection, and at times I haven't even wanted to look. My husband tells me how good I look, I shake my head no, he tells me I'm beautiful and I struggle to say thank you...but I'm getting better. I can like who I see in the mirror, why? Because she has a beautiful heart, she is a strong woman and because she has come through so much in her life, and to get to this wonderful place, I just couldn't be more thankful. I don't want to take one since solitary moment for granted, and seem like I'm ungrateful. I'm blessed beyond measure to be able to have come this far.
 
Have a GREAT day!!!

I have started, deleted and restarted this post so many times. It shouldn't be this difficult to write my first post, I have so much to say... I don't want to start at the "beginning" that needs to come, but I am not sure if I am ready to put into words what brought me to the place I am today. So I think I am going to just talk about why this surgery is important to me. The goals I want to achieve with this surgery and what I want to do for myself along the way.
 
Goals
 
Its easy to set a weight loss goal. I have had a number in mind from the first time I stepped foot in a Weight Watchers meeting when I was 23 years old. I picked a number right smack in the middle of the "acceptable" range. 142... The last time I saw a weight that started with a 1 and a 4 was when I was in the 7th grade. There is a part of me that thinks there is no way in this world I will ever EVER achieve that number again. There is a bigger part of me that says I can do this, no I can do this! So in my head I have a few weight loss goals, and reasons.
 
280: I chose this number because spring of 2012 I worked my butt off for months, with a trainer, 5-6-7 days a week in the gym. Taking step followed by Combat in one day and not blinking an eye. I lost 15# and for the life of me I could not get past 280, I grew frustrated and worried about answering to my trainer and.... I gave up.
 
261: Forever... my top weight was 261, I mean years. I started Weight Watchers so many times at this number it is unreal. It also happens to be the weight where my body seems to react to my weight and causes a metabolic response that causes me to be irregular with my monthly cycle (Sorry guys if this is TMI but it is true) From the moment we women start menstruating we women complain about how horrid it is, how much it effects our lives. After struggling for the past few years of random 2-3 times a year cycles I can say there is nothing that makes me feel like less of a woman than the fact that I do miss that every month. It might sound crazy but I think the first time I get my cycle two times in a row I will probably cry...
 
220: The one and only time I have been completely successful in a weight loss journey was 5.5 years ago. I counted every damn calorie I stuck in my mouth, I counted every damn calorie I burned on the eliptical, I worked hard and it showed. I had someone, that I respect very much, tell me I was like a rose getting ready to bloom any day. I WILL be that rose someday.... and I can't wait.
 
199: Who doesn't have this as a goal? The last time I weight around this weight was after I gave birth to my son. My pregnancy was not the cause of my weight gain. I started my pregnancy at 190# I gave birth to my son at 204# and the day I left the hospital I weight 189#. Yes I was overweight, I admit it, but I was OK.
 
I don't really have a goal between 199 and 142. I don't know where I will land. I know this... I will not stop until I am happy. I love strength, I love muscle and there is nothing that makes me happier than showing up my friends on the gym floor with the weights. We have a University in my town that does body composition testing with the egg thing, once I get to the point where I feel I am close to a goal or I am feeling comfortable I am going to get a full body composition. I did this to lose weight and be healthy, I want to have a healthy body fat percentage and I want it to be accurate.
 
More than anything... Size 2, Size 22 I am doing this for me, and only me. I want to be healthy and truly happy for the first time in a really really long time. I can't wait to add more along the road!
 
I leave you with a picture of me and my pride and joy. I always wanted FIVE children and God has blessed me with one perfectly imperfect son. I know I will have more children someday, more than likely through adoption or marriage but.... you never know! He is my reason.... He is my soul.... He is my life.... He is rotten... and makes me work for kisses (typical 14yo)

On Sunday 9/22 I will be celebrating my 2 month Surgeriversery!!! I weighed in today at 252 which is 31 pounds lost since Surgery. Also a ton of inches!!! I have been extremely happy with my sleeve. I have had one episode of dumping since surgery and that was a day i was bad and got over 65 grams of carbs. My sleeve hated me that day. I am still on the meat, cheese and eggs and next week I can start adding 1/2 cup of veggies to one meal a day. I am a little scared to see how my sleeve will handle it but I am hoping for the best. I am so excited to have asparagus , cauliflower and brocolli!!!
I know we aren't likely to have a dumping issue but I am positive that it was one, I was shaky, sweaty and weak. It passed with in a 1/2 hour. I hadn't had that many carbs in one day since months before surgery. Believe me I will not be having anything that isn't on my doctors approved list anymore. I was glad to have had something like that happen because it has put me back on my path. We all have times we mess up and it is what we learn from it that matters.
I started Zumba on Friday nights and love it!!! My new love! I have been walking mainly since surgery so it is so nice to switch it up a little. I haven't gone shopping yet for anything but I do know I need smaller underwear!! LOL I just don't want to go out and shop and then have to shop again a month later so i have been wearing baggy clothes. I did find some old clothes of mine that now fit me that I will be wearing for a while.

Well I am just shy of 2 months! I have made it to my first mini goal! Yay! So excited! I am and proud that I actually made it! I still am struggling to get in exercise! I know I need to but time is not my friend right now. I literally am so busy right now with everything else. My husband is going through some sort of something right now and I am picking up his slack. ALL the house chores and cooking is falling on me. Not to mention soccer pratice, homework, and giving the kids baths ect. You parents know the deal. It's like I am a single parent right now! He is not happy about his weight and I think seeing me losing and becoming more postive and happy has him in the dumps. He isn't being ugly to me or making me feel guilty but he seems a little checked out. I have mentioned to him about the slacking off but I am trying to let him work through this funk. I am however feeling a little stretched and I am going to snap soon! He is complaining about his weight all the time. It's like he is becoming me before surgery! Hopefully I can inspire him to change his lifestyle and this is just a phase before he snaps out of it and starts to. Well enough of that! It is just something I never thought would happen when I started this. I didn't think it would affect him this way. Well back to me! lol
So my next mini goal is 199! That's right ONEDERLAND! Oh to see those numbers on my scale! What a happy day! So hopefully in the next couple of months I am going to make that happen! I want to make it there or under by Christmas! It is my Christmas present to myself! So my stats so far are...
Pre-Op -7lbs Size 20 pant 1-2x tops
1 Month -26lbs Size 18/16 XL
2 Month -12lbs Size 16/14 regular L no PLUS SIZE! And 45 lbs lighter!
Can't wait to see what next month loss will be! Happy Friday Y'all!

Well, I haven't been here in a while! I have missed reading everyone's progress and frustrations, and just everything! I feel like I let myself down last week, I was in major pain with my back, didn't exercise, didn't take my vitamins like I should have, didn't eat as much as I should have, UGH...I just didn't!
 
I had to break down and see the chiropractor, by OMG, did it feel WONDERFUL!!! My lower back has been in so much pain. I've been walking like a little old lady once I get up from a sitting position! Not very attractive. My chiro did tell me something that I just didn't think of that I thought would be great to share...She said, "you've just lost 25 pounds...that's a significant amount and you are losing inches, your body now has to readjust and will continue to do so as long as you are losing weight. She said it works the same if you are gaining weight." She let me know that the body has to adjust so that it helps you carry the new weight properly. DUH!!! I never even thought of that! She also let me know that while I am losing my body will continue to shift and I may need adjustments throughout this new journey I am taking!
 
Not feeling well really stinks...it just makes you not want to do anything...it's like My get up and GO, just got up and WENT!!! No warning, nothing, just gone! I know we all have off days or weeks, but please, I'm 2 pounds away from being under 200(FINALLY) and I will exercise this week, I will get back into my routine, and I will get under 200 by the end of next week(helps me to speak positive things to me!!!) I have to push myself, and it has been hard with this back of mine. So onward and upward here I gooooooooooooooo!!!!!
 
I just think that this is the best journey of my life...and I'm so very blessed to be able to be on it! Thankful the scale is going down and not up anymore, thankful that I'm just not looking at food the same, thankful that my diabetes is slowly but surely subsiding! All these things I'm thankful for! I'm also thankful for everyone on here, reading your ups and downs, highs and lows, successes and failures, trials and errors, and just the everyday thoughts of this walk we are on...helps me make it through this very day!
 
So...Trust in yourself...believe in who you are...YOU are a wonderful person. AND Don't "allow" anyone else to convince you differently! - My Hubs told me that! Gotta love that man!!!

Chicken and Spinach Paleo Ravioli
 
http://cupcakesomg.blogspot.fr/2012/08/paleo-ravioli.html
 
Kinda funny because the blog is named "Cupcakes OMG"
 
Check right under the recipe for other healthy ones, like her "Caulif-redo Sauce".

I'm reading post after post in regards to whom people have told. And it seems very few are telling people outside of their 'cirle'.
 
Me, I've told the world. If someone at work asks, I tell them. My job knew the second i started contemplating the surgery.
 
I think part of my decision to tell everyone was I work for the company/hospital who does the surgery. i was the first one at my insurance company to get lapband. and now i am the first one to get the revision. i actually considered trying to get a job at the bariatric clinic. everyone at work has been so amazingly supportive. two of my close friends at work have gotten surgeries too. i feel like i've inspired others to follow suit, or to at least go to a clnic. i've sort of become the poster child for the surgery. matter of a fact, i may soon literally be the post child. marketing has asked if i'd be willing to be part of our 'my story' campaign. I have already put a testimonial on the website. they want to do a photo shoot (WHAT?? WHO? ME?? really? YIKES, YAY) most of the posters i would be on are within the insurance company and the hospitals. there's a very slight (NO WAY! YIKES) possibility i may be on a billboard.
 
see here in new mexico, not very many doctors offer the surgery. matter of a fact, it appears to just be our hospital here in albuquerque and one in santa fe. so it's a huge deal to have success stories and advertisement when a huge part of your advertising is 'only hospital in alb to offer wls'. i don't know if all this will come to light, but i'm willing to do what it takes to inspire others. or to be there for anyone who has questions. granted, one of my best friends is the manager of the clinic now, so i doubt she'll let it go. she'll make sure my mug shot is out there! haha..
 
 

Here's to five goals down, and 9 lbs to halfway!!!
 

Lose 20 lbs - complete!
Get under 200 lbs - complete!
Lose 45 lbs - complete!
Get to 190 - complete!
Lose 50 lbs- complete!
Get to 186
Get to 180
Get to 179 (halfway!)
Get to 165
Get to 160
Get to 155
Get to 150
Get to 145
Get to 140
Get to 135
Get to 125
Get to 120

OMG...they FIT, they FIT, they FIT!!!!
 
The JEANS, that I have had in my closet forever...FIT!!! Skinny, yet curvy(curvy is GOOD people!!)
 
SO...I was in the closet, I decided today was the day I was going to try them on AGAIN...thinking to myself, "oh these didn't fit 3 weeks ago, they will fit in about a month from now". WELL...I put them on, because I always love denim, and I buttoned them, smile began to surface...zipped them, BIG cheesy grin by this time, AND...I AM STILL BREATHING!!! So you better believe I did NOT take these suckers off!!!!
 
I've been doing a little jig, with a little song that just makes the big cheesy grin, not so cheesy...they fit, uh-huh, they fit...oh yea!!!!
 
It's the little successes that are HUGE!!! Just made my day!!!
 
Have a blessed day!!! Keep up the good work everyone and remember to be FABULOUS today!!!

Well...GOOD morning!!!! I took the advice I was given and ran with it! I am trying...trying...trying to up my calorie intake, that is very difficult, but I am managing!!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOO...as the title states, IT MOVED!!! The scale, it moved, it moved, it moved!!! And I got so excited, I told my hubs...he likes to joke around and he said, "well the scale does move when you get on!!" I just said, "HONEY!!" He laughed and I said my stall is gone for now, now that makes me HAPPY!!! It was stuck, on 208 forever! NOW...it reads 203.8!!! Yippee!!! I have to say, we are all on this journey and I am super thankful, daily, that I have the support that I have, and I will help be a support to anyone who needs it! This is for the rest of our lives and that is the really exciting part!!! We get to have energy, function without losing our breath, exercise and not still be jiggling even when we are done, live longer, have a healthy relationship with food, give our families the BEST of us...the list goes on and on! I'm just so excited to see and hear about everyone's progress, it just makes me smile!!!

I'm starting to feel energized. I'm starting to feel like maybe, just maybe, I can pull this off! I've had a few missteps, I've tested myself, but I haven't completely f'ed this up yet....amazing! I've never stuck to a diet this long with this much determination - 5 months! And this is a new way of life, not just a diet! How is it possible I haven't screwed it up yet? How is it possible I've lost 49 pounds? How is it possible I'm able to check off the goals on my list with regularity and this is all still happening? I'm blown away. I can't believe I'm doing this! I can't believe I've begun to look forward to working out! Me, the lazy, fat girl who loves her couch! Unbelievable!! I'm actually contemplating doing things I never thought I would do, things that scare me, challenge me, push me......and I'm actually starting to believe I can do them....
 
Here's to four goals down, 1 lb to the fifth goal, and 10 lbs to halfway!!!
 

Lose 20 lbs - complete!
Get under 200 lbs - complete!
Lose 45 lbs - complete!
Get to 190 - complete!
Lose 50 lbs
Get to 186
Get to 180
Get to 179 (halfway!)
Get to 165
Get to 160
Get to 155
Get to 150
Get to 145
Get to 140
Get to 135
Get to 125
Get to 120

Good morning world!! I am waking up feeling like a new person! I have not been on the scale since Friday, but continued my walking and exercise all weekend. I feel great! I promised myself that I wouldn't continuously take pics, but for someone who LOVES being the one TAKING the pics, this has really helped me put things in perspective. I have always been asked if I'm pregnant, I carry the majority of my weight in the dreaded gut. I attached a pic and it has helped me see that while the scale isn't moving, I am STILL making progress! The bottom right pic is me the day before my surgery, the middle one was 2 weeks ago, and the top left is me last week. It has helped me to actually SEE what is going on, and that helps to wrap my mind around what changes are taking place. I guess I just wanted to post this because I am as frustrated as the rest of those I see on this site with the stall that I am facing, head on, but I have to say...take some pics, compare them to the day you went in for surgery and I think you will be pleasantly surprised! So...in about an hour or so I will be getting on the scale, have a Dr.'s appointment...hope it is positive! Have a great DAY!!!

I'm so excited this morning!! I just want to share it with everyone! I have been in a 2 1/2 week stall and just patiently waiting. I read many blogs and forums of people sharing the fact that stalls happen and you just gotta keep going so that's what I was doing. I have been at 201 this whole time just waiting to get to Onederland. I had not weighed myself since Monday because I honestly didn't want to keep seeing the same thing again. This morning my husband asked me if I had weighed myself and I said no. I thought, I'll just see where I stand today. And to my VERY pleasant surprise I weighed in at 198! I'm so happy to be in Onederland!!! I also went into my closet and found some brand new jeans that I had bought 7 years ago but never wore because I gained too much weight and was able to put them on! Plus today is Friday, and payday and I'm taking portraits of a beautiful bride to be this afternoon! Today is just an awesome day! I hope everyone is doing just as awesome!

I have been lost in thought for awhile, running all kinds of emotions.
So I thought I will do my old standby. Make a List...
a List of Why I am wanting to keep my head up & not cheat, not give in to my belly...
all its moaning & groaning of thinking it wants something Sweet or Salty... or something besides Shakes, protein, veg's or a single piece of fruit..
 
things I want to be able to do.
~sit in a both when I go out to with my family.
~not have to worry about whom is driving, due to the seatbelt issue.
~ride any fair or amusement park ride.
~be able to go buy cloths that don't come from The Big Girl section (basically anything without a X or few)
~be able to not have fear of people asking when I'm Due.
~for that matter no terrible comments or remarks.
~to be able to actually Smile without hiding the pain of something.
~to not have to worry if I drop something & have to pick it up in public.
~be able to go swimming at a public pool without giggles.
~when family & friends gets together to not worry about a chair breaking.
~to be able to ride the dirt bike.
~to be able to wear high heels again when I feel like it.
~to do a 5K without walking.
~going skiing.
~go tubing.
~go rollerblading again.
~ride a horse without extra stress.
~go on the zip-line.
~go golfing without getting to tired.
 
 
I have many more that have rolled through my head & now that I sit to type they have disappeared.
This Journey is for me, for my Health & Happiness.
Sometimes I just have to remember that.
 
this was just a quick rant.
I'm so ready for this change.
Happy Trails to everyone on their own Journey!

"Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you greater than any obstacle." - Christian D. Larson...I have to constantly surround myself with positive thoughts and quotes, etc. I have been doing this for a long time, it has helped renew my mind, focusing on what is going to help and not hinder me. Sometimes my mind can be a frightening place, and it has been that for years of emotional eating, out of control habits where food is concerned and all to the detriment of my health. I developed Diabetes, and was on oral meds and 5 shots a day and my numbers were still not where they were supposed to be. So I realized, a while ago, I had to change my mindset first, and the rest will follow. It's so easy to listen to and believe the negative things you tell yourself. I honestly remember telling myself how much I hated me and what I had become, I could not look at myself in the mirror without disgust at what I saw. My kids would judge how much weight mom lost according to if they could connect their hands around me when they hugged me. So after a bad marriage, and a bad 5 year relationship, I decided to work on ME. In doing so, I found the person I lost, and surprisingly she was waiting to make an entrance. She sat in the background being emotionally battered for long enough and food was her only friend. I tried denying the Diabetes and it got worse, they had to change insulin doses all the time just to see what might work, and it caused me to feel sick more often than not. But I had to press through, and had to realize that I AM worth fighting for, I AM worth my time, and I don't want my kids to know life without me at this point, I'm still young. That's where the positive talk came in to play and I can honestly say that with all things this helps me the most. I feel better because I am working on me from the inside out. This surgery was just icing on the "virtual" cake!!! Now I am self motivating me for the start of the rest of my life, and it feels great!!! I try not to let the negative things get me down, because I've been down that depression/anxiety road before and I don't like that path in life at all. Some things I say over and over that really help are as follows: "There is nothing to great of accomplishment for one who knows the power of one's word and follows one's intuitive leads." - "The perfect plan includes health, wealth, love and perfect self-expression. this is the square of life, which brings perfect happiness." - "When you feel the world pushing against you...drop your head, lower your shoulder and dig in deep and push back." - and the best one so far, by Joel Osteen: "You need to associate with people that inspire you, people tat challenge you to rise higher, people that make you better. Don't waste your valuable time with people that are not adding to your growth. Your destiny is too important." Believe that...YOU are important, YOU are so worth the effort you put in to yourself and YOU will be the BEST YOU that you can possibly be. As the song says...."YOU are AMAZING, JUST the way YOU ARE!!!"

I'm doing good! Both surgeries went well. The doctor said the gall bladder was more difficult than he thought but was successful. He called my sleeve "beautiful" and all went without a hitch there. Can't eat very much at all and still having pain but its only 4 days post op. I was in the hospital 3 nights because my blood pressure and pain were a little out of hand. They got the blood pressure under control by Saturday evening. They had to do a test on Sunday because they gave me 4 pills to take by mouth and it gave me a lot of pain. They had me drink this special liquid while they took pictures and the doctor said there were no leaks but the sleeve is really tight and it's going to take a while for the inflammation to go down. He also said that because the sleeve is so tight that even over time as my stomach might stretch some it will never be all that big. All in all, I'm doing better and just waiting to get to my "new" normal. My tongue has been slightly numb since surgery and I'm still waiting for that to go away. I have a follow up with Dr. Shukla next week. Thanks to all who have checked on me!

Today I am 3 weeks post op and I tell you what, many things have happened in the past 3 weeks. I am going to tell you about the positives things because those are the ones that matter and are worth remembering!
 
I’ll start with the fact that I have lost 31 lbs so far! I am 2 pounds away from being in Onederland! At this point I have mostly figured out how much I am able to eat. I sometimes eat a little fast or a little too much and feel uncomfortable for about 30 minutes but then it passes. The only thing my stomach hasn't really liked was some creamed corn I ate from Rudy’s BBQ. Other than that I have been able to keep everything down…ground beef, fish, chicken, turkey, rice, beans, etc. I have not had the problems others have had with eating bread. I can eat pretty much anything, just not a lot. For example, we took our youngest daughter out to eat for her birthday yesterday and my husband and I split a plate. I basically took enough food for about 8 bites and he ate the rest. My girls both ate and the whole thing was just $32 with tip for all 4 of us. That’s another great thing…saving money when we go out!
 
Something else I love is that many of my clothes are very loose and you can tell I have lost weight which is cool. I had to go digging in my closet for some smaller jeans that I haven’t worn in a while and they fit perfectly. I also wore a dress that I haven’t fit into since my husband and I were engaged over 5 years ago. That was a nice feeling! I am excited about fitting into other things that have been just sitting in my closet waiting to be used!
 
Now to get a little more personal, a difficult but great thing happened to me last week. I was dealing with some emotional issues that made me cry a lot. I walked home from where I was and on the way there I just kept thinking about how much I wanted to go stuff my face. I got home, opened the fridge and just imagined myself getting sick if I did it. I couldn’t do it. In that moment I was forced to deal with my emotions a different way. I cried some more and then talk to God about it. About 30 minutes after that I talk to my husband about it too. It was such a big moment for me. To realize that I can walk away from the food that will do nothing but make me sick in that moment and over time and rely on a God that loves me unconditionally. It came to the surface…what I already knew….that I wasn’t giving Him all of me. Now I am surrendering the rest of me…slowly but surely. He deserves it all, not just the parts I am comfortable giving. What a wonderful experience! Such a moment of growth!
 
I am grateful for all the special moments I have had so far and I can’t wait to see what new adventures await me!

I'm doing good! Both surgeries went well. The doctor said the gall bladder was more difficult than he thought but was successful. He called my sleeve "beautiful" and all went without a hitch there. Can't eat very much at all and still having pain but its only 4 days post op. I was in the hospital 3 nights because my blood pressure and pain were a little out of hand. They got the blood pressure under control by Saturday evening. They had to do a test on Sunday because they gave me 4 pills to take by mouth and it gave me a lot of pain. They had me drink this special liquid while they took pictures and the doctor said there were no leaks but the sleeve is really tight and it's going to take a while for the inflammation to go down. He also said that because the sleeve is so tight that even over time as my stomach might stretch some it will never be all that big. All in all, I'm doing better and just waiting to get to my "new" normal. My tongue has been slightly numb since surgery and I'm still waiting for that to go away. I have a follow up with Dr. Shukla next week. Thanks to all who have checked on me!

I'm doing good! Both surgeries went well. The doctor said the gall bladder was more difficult than he thought but was successful. He called my sleeve "beautiful" and all went without a hitch there. Can't eat very much at all and still having pain but its only 4 days post op. I was in the hospital 3 nights because my blood pressure and pain were a little out of hand. They got the blood pressure under control by Saturday evening. They had to do a test on Sunday because they gave me 4 pills to take by mouth and it gave me a lot of pain. They had me drink this special liquid while they took pictures and the doctor said there were no leaks but the sleeve is really tight and it's going to take a while for the inflammation to go down. He also said that because the sleeve is so tight that even over time as my stomach might stretch some it will never be all that big. All in all, I'm doing better and just waiting to get to my "new" normal. My tongue has been slightly numb since surgery and I'm still waiting for that to go away. I have a follow up with Dr. Shukla next week. Thanks to all who have checked on me!

I'm doing good! Both surgeries went well. The doctor said the gall bladder was more difficult than he thought but was successful. He called my sleeve "beautiful" and all went without a hitch there. Can't eat very much at all and still having pain but its only 4 days post op. I was in the hospital 3 nights because my blood pressure and pain were a little out of hand. They got the blood pressure under control by Saturday evening. They had to do a test on Sunday because they gave me 4 pills to take by mouth and it gave me a lot of pain. They had me drink this special liquid while they took pictures and the doctor said there were no leaks but the sleeve is really tight and it's going to take a while for the inflammation to go down. He also said that because the sleeve is so tight that even over time as my stomach might stretch some it will never be all that big. All in all, I'm doing better and just waiting to get to my "new" normal. My tongue has been slightly numb since surgery and I'm still waiting for that to go away. I have a follow up with Dr. Shukla next week. Thanks to all who have checked on me!

I'm doing good! Both surgeries went well. The doctor said the gall bladder was more difficult than he thought but was successful. He called my sleeve "beautiful" and all went without a hitch there. Can't eat very much at all and still having pain but its only 4 days post op. I was in the hospital 3 nights because my blood pressure and pain were a little out of hand. They got the blood pressure under control by Saturday evening. They had to do a test on Sunday because they gave me 4 pills to take by mouth and it gave me a lot of pain. They had me drink this special liquid while they took pictures and the doctor said there were no leaks but the sleeve is really tight and it's going to take a while for the inflammation to go down. He also said that because the sleeve is so tight that even over time as my stomach might stretch some it will never be all that big. All in all, I'm doing better and just waiting to get to my "new" normal. My tongue has been slightly numb since surgery and I'm still waiting for that to go away. I have a follow up with Dr. Shukla next week. Thanks to all who have checked on me!

I need ice, and a cute cup I holler at my mom! She asks why.... Clearly know why chuckling under her breath... I say back to her because if I was at my house I would be drinking this grape flavored **** out of a martini glass just for the fun of it! It's gonna be a long night and I want to do it in style
 
 
So surgery is tmw! Going to be there at 6 am to drop my mom off then I have three hours to kill while I wait for my check in time... I will be sure to post more in the morning
 
Have a good night y'all and add/like my page... It gives me fun to read about all the great stories
 
Ellie j

It's funny how things work out. One day, you go to the doctor for a sinus infection you can't shake, 7 days later you are scheduled for surgery.
 
Let me tell you how I got there. Just after my birthday last month I started feeling rotten. No matter what I took I was not getting better. I had ear and throat ache, headache, congestion, the whole bit. Then I got sick to my stomach too. The following Monday I decided to go to doctor to get checked out. The doctor gave me an antibiotic for my sinus, a medicine for the nausea and took some blood. A couple of days later his office asked me to come in to talk to me about my results. I thought, that can't be good. Normally if everything's good they just say that or mail you the results. So, I took time off work and went to my doctor. He told me he found a few things that needed to be addressed in my blood work. Here is what he brought up:
 
- Anemia - I started taking iron pills right away.
- Blood Sugar Elevated - He needs to do a more comprehensive test but believes I am in the beginning stages of diabetes. (I have a family history of it through my mom, grandma, etc.)
- Liver Enzymes are elevated
- Pancreatic Enzymes are elevated
 
The doctor sent me to get an ultrasound to check my gallbladder. Based on the results I was scheduled to see a surgeon named Dr. Urmil Shukla to schedule my gall bladder removal surgery. I nervously made my way to his office to hear the details of what was coming. He told me that I had many stones in my gall bladder and it needed to come out very soon. I have never had surgery so the thought of it made me so nervous. Then, while looking over my chart, he saw my already existing high blood pressure, the recent blood work results, my BMI of 42, my Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, my constant tiredness and sleepiness and he presented an opportunity.
 
Dr. Shukla explained that while he removes my gall bladder he could also do a "Sleeve Gastrectomy". I gave him a puzzled look. He explained the purpose of the surgery and told me how much it could benefit me to have it done. He gave me some paperwork, told me to think about it and let him know what I decide.
 
I spent the next week researching the surgery, his credentials on this type of surgery, the cost and how I could make something like this happen. I have dieted before, even lost almost 50 pounds one time. But eventually I gained it all back. I am now a mother of two adopted daughters that I love so much and I want to be here for them. I want to be healthy. I want to keep up with them when we play. I want to be able to say "YES!" when they want to do something fun that requires a lot of energy. I want to have enough room on my lap for them to comfortably sit down. I want to desire to be in pictures with them not just take pictures of them.
 
After research and several conversations with my husband, we decided to move forward with both surgeries. In the midst of my research I read that having any kind of infection (including an abscessed tooth) will keep you from getting a surgery. I had a toothache for a while so went to the dentist and found out that I have two infected teeth that are beyond saving and need to be extracted. I was put on an antibiotic and two days later I went to get the two teeth removed. One tooth was easy, the other had to be surgically removed. The teeth are pretty much healed now.
 
Just two days after removing my teeth I went on a mission trip for one week. I just got back on Saturday night. It has been one crazy ride! Today I went to the doctor's office and the hospital to pay my portion of the surgeries. My surgeries are scheduled for this Friday, July 26, 2013. I am nervous and excited! I pray everything goes well and there are no complications. If you pray, please pray with me.
 
I am glad to have found this community of people who are changing their lives one day at a time. I have read many encouraging blogs so far, seen many wonderful before and after photos and found some funny videos too! I can't wait to see what else I can learn from this strong group of people!