Roo101769

Ok I know I am not the first to have this NSV, but I certainly am loving it! I decided to take a bath this a.m. Due to bad weather and a sick kid I stayed home from work today. My daughter was in her room laying down so I thought I would hop in the tub. My friend gave me fizzy balls for the bath and I wanted to use them. Typically I don't take baths. Not only is it a huge effort to get in and out, I felt wedged in the tub. Last bath I took I was literally touching every side of the tub at once. My hips barely fit. Anyway, I still have a small difficulty getting up and down, mainly worried about bad knees. But once I sat down I realized I had room! Not huge, but about an inch on each side of my hips!!! Woo hoo! I laid back to soak and realized it was so much more comfortable to do that too. I have decided I need to buy more bath products now because I see a lot more of these soaks in my future!

I am sure there is a point we all go through where we may not look totally healthy. Or bodies need time to adjust to what they are going through. I have lost around 65lbs so far and, at times, I look bad. My hair is terrible (not just due to surgery but other factors) so I started wearing a wig. With the wig I need to wear make up or I think I look weird..So I actually look better now to others, but when I am home and "undone" I look horrible. It is all perspective. I still have over 100lbs to lose to reach "goal" so who knows what stages my body will go through. Ultimately all I care is I am healthy so let others have their opinions...

Me too, lighter than in years. I do not know the actual last time I was this weight, but I would say at least 15+ years!

100% truth..I was sleeved 10/21. I have lost 30 lbs since then. From everyone's posts I have read, plus my NUTs opinion, that is a modest amount. I have not exercised to speak of and I have struggled with eating. (around the holidays) I do believe had I ate to plan and did more moving I would have lost more weight by now. So....going forward (2014 resolution of sorts) I am getting back to eating clean and incorporating more exercise into my life. I still have a few months left of the "honeymoon" period and I really want to take advantage of them!!!

I will leave the thought of being obese and unhealthy behind in 2013. I have no reason, no excuse, not to be the healthiest I can. I leave behind arthritic knees that I can barely walk on. I no longer take medication of any kind for them, and I can wear heels again. I leave behind (God willing) the circulatory problems that have lead to repeated DVTs /PEs. Everything that can be done (including getting the weight of) is being done. I do not want to be a statistic and die from it. I leave behind the notion I have it all in control with my sleeve. I learned over the holidays there is NO doubt, I am addicted to carbs. I now know what a slippery path it can be if I allow myself to "go there". I can't. I do not have the control. I leave behind 63lbs that hurt me, held me down. I was allowing fat to kill me a little each day. I lived like an woman much older than my years. I don't ever want that body again, one that limited each and every aspect of my life. I left behind my hair in 2013. It is something that is kind of hard for me to this day, but it is what it is. I am wearing a wig now that I really like and get tons of compliments. Now...in 2014 I hope to find me. I hope to reach my goals, with the sleeve and in life. I want to be healthy, I want to feel young again. I want to be the best mom I can for my daughter. Yes, I even have hope for maybe finding love. ( Ok- been single a looooong time! lol) But I hope to find love for myself before I love another. I am working on it all. Because long as I am here there is hope!

Well...now I have to go buy an ice cream maker! LOL

I certainly hope it is possible because it is my plan!! I was sleeved 10/21 and I have lost 30lbs. Prior to surgery I had lost 32lbs, so in total I have lost 62lbs.( Since August) I absolutely struggled during the holidays, I will be the first to admit it. I don't want to be bashed or pitied, because I own what I did. I am recommitting my efforts to try to get things where I need/ want them to be. Granted the first months are supposed to be the easiest for weight loss, and now those are gone. But the honeymoon isn't over and I still plan to work the sleeve the most I can. I have my plan for fitness in place, I have downloaded the Fitbit app (and will buy the Fitbit asap) and I have the will. The third thing is probably the biggest key for success. Even at the weight I am, I am thinner than I have been in over ten years. I am very excited to see how much further I can take this. I haven't forgotten why I had surgery, I just needed to hit the reset button. So good luck to us all for keeping on keeping on!!!!!!

You are not alone. My first few days post op were very similar. I had pretty bad problems with the anesthesia ( could NOT wake up after surgery) and when I finally did my first clear memory was of throwing up everywhere. I too had nausea, mostly after pain meds. So each time I got the pain med I had a Phenergan chaser! LOL I was in two nights myself, but that was their standard. I was only able ice chips (no water) for the first two days. The day I was released I was given a cup of apple juice, but only managed a couple sips of it. I was up walking and going potty pretty well on my own, and I really didn't have a lot of gas issues. When I got home I was wiped out for about a day. Then I started getting my strength back little by little. I was feeling better from the surgery when I returned to work 9 days after. But, I was exhausted for several more days. About two and a half to three weeks out I finally started to feel a lot like my old "normal" self. I think I did not give enough thought to this being MAJOR surgery and what it could do to my body. I too had read about how easy it was for others and fluffed it off. But everyone is vastly different. My very best friend had his sleeve done 12/17 and he had pretty much NO issues at all, released next day and none of the problems I did. It just is what it is. But I can honestly tell you it will get better!

I have five incision scars plus the drain scar. Two incisions were about a quarter of an inch to half an inch each. The other three are all about and inch to an inch and a half. In the hospital one of my incisions oozed horribly. I was told it was because I have to be on blood thinners and they said my subcutaneous tissue was "mush". So they glued it shut. The rest were stiched. I tried removing my steri strips too early, but my surgeon said it was ok. I ended up busting a stitch or two in one incision then spent two weeks dressing with butterfly bandages to try to pull it together to heal well. That scar is the only odd one. The area that opened developed a larger area of scar tissue. It "looks" almost the same but feels a lot different than the other scars. They are all still pretty red, but I am sure they will fade with time.

I have one. I have only used it once. I made a LOT at that time though. It is good. I didn't try a lot of the recipes so not sure all that can be done with it. But I certainly believe it is money well spent!

So I don't happen to have any baby photos of my girl available, ( not that your little man isn't totally crazy adorable gmanbat) but I can share a pic of her now. She is beautiful. Yes, I am very biased. But many others have said the same so they must be right, right? LOL

I made chicken cordon blue casserole ( recipe off of this site!) and mashed cauliflower. I also had loaded mashed potatoes for those non healthy eaters. My cauliflower was a little to garlicky, and I really like garlic. But the casserole was VERY good! I made taco cupcakes Tuesday and really enjoyed them. ( in cupcake tin with ground turkey and wonton wrappers) Christmas breakfast was egg muffins, another recipe from here!

I am not saying this for pity or to be confrontational. This is just MY truth. I can (and have) eat slider foods easily. Not to the extreme quantity I once was able, but much easier than I can eat Protein. I have struggled with stopping now that I started. There may be people who can limit their self to just one, I am not that type person. As the poster said above, be careful. I am just over two months out and already find slider food easy to eat, so I am very worried about 4, 6, 8 months out! This is my addiction. I have fought it and have been able to lose 62lbs since August. ( both before and after surgery) But I am still morbidly obese. I still need to lose about 118lbs. If I don't get a grip on my addiction again, it will win. I didn't have major surgery for that to happen. I would never beat anyone up for doing something I have done. I just say remember how we all got to this point to begin with. If control was easy for us would we really had needed the surgery?

I am so right there with you!!! I too have had slips. Ok, fall flat on my face. I am not even that far out so it is even more disturbing. I seriously thought I would be more emotionally ready for the holidays than I was, plain and simple. So I too have already decided to recommit myself to the plan. I have to detox again from carbs. I am going to substantially increase my activity level and try to start working some of the dangling bits into a bit more solid mass. (ie: firming and toning) I have already told my five year old that starting the new year all the junk is gone. (she doesn't need it either) I have been very lucky I haven't gained, but I also haven't lost anything. Before the damage is done I need to nip it in the bud! Good luck and Happy New Year!

Oh RJ and McButterpants, I totally do get where you are coming from. Not that I have experienced anything near what you have RJ. ( I thank God for me and say prayers for you) But the mind I was in pre op is a lot different than my post op mind. I am still happy I had the surgery. I am glad I have the chance to change my self in a way I need. But I have struggled with "old brain" lately. I want to eat as I have, which I cannot. I eat too fast and I have mindlessly put things in my mouth. I will be the first to admit I was not as prepared for the holidays ( mentally and emotionally) as I had hoped I would be. I have been tempted, and have given in to temptation. Do I eat crap every meal? No. I do try to maintain my focus on lean Protein first. But some sliders have slid by. Enough to set off a fairly "good" bought of diarrhea. ( Seeing the glass as half full I will have to say it cured some constipation issues I was having) I had to hit the reset button and get myself back in check. The thing is I have not been as strong mentally as I thought I was. I did my research. I could talk the talk. But walking the walk has been more difficult than I ever gave credit to. I am not giving up or giving in. Everyday I have the chance to do what I know I need to...RJ, I think you suffer from PTSD. I am not trained in any way to feel this, but what you have gone through certainly more than qualifies you I think. I really hope one day soon you find what you need to be better able to cope with your new world. To me you seem like an awesome person deserving of an awesome life!

I am going to precursor this post with the fact that I do understand every surgeon/hospital/ practice has different requirements when it comes to WLS. But I am just stunned at HOW different sometimes!!! One of my very BFFs in the world ( since high school) was sleeved yesterday. His process has been entirely different than mine and it astounds me. He did not have all the extensive pre op testing before approval as I did, but he had to do several classes with NUT. ( I only saw NUT once. She was satisfied with my knowledge and my insurance didn't require anything but NUT approval) My friend didn't even have a scope done to check the esophagus down to stomach, just an upper GI. My upper GI missed a small hernia that was found via the scope. ( but was so small they didn't repair) His pre op diet included food ( two Lean Cuisines or the like a day for 7 days ) while mine was full liquids for ten days. He did not have to do any bowl prep pre op, although he had food up until the evening before surgery. ( I did no bowl prep due to liquid diet for 10 days) He does not have a drain tube and there was no catheter used during surgery. And he just told me he already was given custard this morning to eat!!!!!!!!!! Seriously? I could barely sip a few ounces of apple juice two days post op, let alone eating anything the next day. Now I know my body reacted much differently than his from anesthesia and so on, but wow. ( I had severe nausea and vomiting, he hasn't had any of that) And the other thing...I was in the hospital from 8am on Monday until about 4:30pm Wednesday. He said he is supposed to be released today. His whole process seems so rushed and weird to me. I wouldn't trade the experience I had for the world. I loved the hospital I used and the staff was awesome. I guess I am biased to it. I try hard to keep my opinions to myself because I do not want to "step on his moment" in any way. This is just as big of an event for him as it was for me so I do not want to be a negative Nelly. But I am certainly having opinions about how different things have been for him. I truly just want him to be healthy and happy.

My psych eval was pretty easy. I said all the right things because I really did know the material. ( I wasn't trying to snow anyone, just well read on the subject) I took a long written "test" for him and that sort of worried me. It was almost testing intellect. I thought "you have to have a high IQ to need bariatric surgery???" Anyway, this guy is published on the subject. I was sort of nervous due to that fact. ( that and I really don't like shrinks much) But when all was said and done I passed and it really wasn't that big of deal. I am sorry to hear you got "one of those" types with their preconceived notions. I don't believe she should be giving evaluations for weight loss surgery if she feels that way!

Ok, I have to be honest here. I am not married, I am single. But I can answer to part of your post. I am more self conscience of my body now than I ever was fat. Now granted, once I hit 316lbs it was becoming a big issue. But when I was maintaining around 280-290lbs ( for a few years) I was pretty self confident. But now I weigh less than I have in at least 10 years and I am more self conscience than ever! The fat is shrinking but it is leaving behind dimpled and excess skin. Not to mention my scars from surgery that criss cross my abdomen are still red and angry looking. I cannot imagine anyone seeing me naked at this point. While I am dressed I do look ok, it is just the thought of what I look like undressed that freezes me up. I am scared to death to even contemplate that notion right now. So I may understand how you feel. As far as your hubby...I can only take a guess and assume he doesn't know how to act. You and he were in the same place at the same time when you first got to know each others bodies. But now yours is changing, quickly. While you are learning it, he may feel afraid to. The body you had is gone. ( the one he knew) The body you have right now is only momentary. If he really likes it he might be disappointed when it too is gone. It is good to know you two can talk, that has to be helpful. I hope you can find someone out there that has more insight and might be able to help. The best of luck on working it all out!!!

PdxMan...I understand what you are saying, truly. And my post wasn't meant to sound as "comparative" as it did. I was just trying to impress upon how different it was. As I stated at the start I understand each practice / hospital is different. The only place I had any great concerns for my friend was the lack of testing he went through. It didn't seem they were getting a full and accurate picture of his anatomy pre op without the tests. ( such as the scope) But as you said, it is what the surgeon is comfortable doing. I just love my friend and worry a great deal about him. He is a Hodgkins Lymphoma survivor and I worry. He is 401lbs and has sleep apnea, high BP and other issues. I just want him to be healthy and HERE! I look forward to having this friend to help me with my journey, and me with his. Part of his decision making was based on ME deciding to go for it. We have spent years ( and do I mean YEARS) dieting together, going up and down and back up together. Can't tell you how many "before" pictures we have taken together. This is the first time we both have the chance at success. I truly don't mean to compare our journeys other than seeing what works and what does not for each of us. At the same time I have done a LOT of reading and research and spent hours on the boards seeing everyone's stories. (He has not) I guess I just meant my original post as a thought provoker, to encourage discussion. Because I for one am truly amazed at how different it all can be.

Thanks McButterpants.. That weight is my total loss since I began my journey. ( I decided to have the sleeve in July and I started my own diet pre op Aug 1st) Since surgery I have lost 26lbs. ( It will be two months the 21st) I am working at it. Every day is a new day and a new struggle, but I am trying to keep it together and do the best I can!

I have turned to this forum to get this off my chest. I have been struggling and a lot of it is mental, so I thought perhaps writing it down could help somehow. I am not looking for absolution. I just need to figure a way to wrap my head around my problem, deal with it, then figure a way to move forward. I was sleeved almost two months ago. I very recently found out that my new stomach can tolerate slider (junk) food with little to no issue at all. This is very disheartening for me to deal with. I really wished I would have been one who could not stomach sugar or greasey foods post op. But no, the stomach that was always made of iron continues to be, even if much smaller. It all started innocently enough, one bite. That was all it seemed to take. I know I am a carb junkie and have been trying to stay away from them so not to kick my addiction back in. But having so much junk around me, more so now at Christmas time...Needless to say my head hunger has taken over. I have done poorly for about a week now. Pre op I had dieted and lost about 33lbs since August. Even then I was starting to have real problems controling the addiction. I have only lost 25lbs post op. While 25lbs lost is 25 more pounds gone, I am also sort of disappointed my loss hasn't been greater. And before anyone says anything, yes a large part of that is my fault. More the lack of exercise than eating wrong. (Until recently). I really just don't know how I got here. I want to push the reset button and start over. Never try those "forbidden" items to begin with. I know I need to kick my own butt, get back on track. I am really hoping I will soon have a close friend's support to keep me honest. (He was sleeved today) I just need to make it through the holidays ( when extra food just is) and get back on the bandwagon. Anyone who says food (especially carbs) aren't addictive is a fool and doesn't know anything! This addiction is just as hard to fight. I appreciate I can come here to unload and try to make sense of it all. I know everyone here knows this struggle...

I am going to look into those books as well. The thing is I KNOW the whole "refined carbs are bad for me" thing. I lived the proof by cutting them out and losing the 33lbs pre op. It is just a daily struggle, as any addict will have, to stay away from the drug of choice. I thought I would be able to sail through Christmas time without that addiction working me. I was wrong. The rest of the year I stay away from them. They are there, but I have an easier time turning a blind eye. But this month has been a lot harder than I thought. The extra treats and goodies. My daughter bringing home things. Friends dropping by with goodies "for my daughter". I can easily avoid buying things I like that she can still have as treats. There are plenty of things I really don't care for that she loves! ( She loves gummies but really doesn't care that much for chocolate. Not me!) I just need to muster through the next week or so and then out with the old (again), and in with the new! I can and will do this. I truly appreciate the love and support from you all though. Makes the insecure times a lot easier to go through having people who "get it". Love you all!!!

Thanks everyone. Today IS a new day and I am going to do everything I can to make the right choices. I really appreciate the support and advice. Being a single mom I really can't go to a support group as I have no one to watch my daughter. So this is my support group! And you all do support. I am going to do what I can to stay motivated. This morning I weighed myself and I am down another pound, so that helped. I am just going to put one foot in front of the other and dig deep. When the carb monkey rears it's ugly head, well it is time to take a walk. I will eat lean protein and fill myself on that. I don't need junk and I am better than that. Thank you all for reminding me!

Just a little add on. I went for a follow up with my hematologist last week. He said my last genetic test came back negative for clotting disorder. But he did say this...When he first started in the field there were about five or six tests that looked for clotting disorders. Now there are over 20! He believes that sometime in my life a test will be developed that will pinpoint exactly why I have the propensity to clot. But at this time I am considered "of unknown origin" in my clots because all the current tests have been negative. My theory - if it is meant to be it will be. Why worry about what you can't control, just do what you can and ther rest is left up to a higher power!