Hi there! First of all, you shouldn't be afraid to discuss improving your health with your doctor. If she isn't supportive of your desire to take charge of your weight and health, then its time to find a new doctor!
I'm not sure where you live in NYC, but my PCP is in Clark, NJ... just over the Goethals bridge and was extremely supportive. I know its a bit of a drive, but I would completely recommend him if you live in Staten Island. He kept encouraging me during my 6-month supervised weight loss period and wrote two very strongly worded letters of support to submit to my insurance. The letters worked and I was approved for surgery within 1 week.
Good luck and let me know if you'd like information on my PCP or surgeon. I'd highly recommend both!