Daddysgirl10

(Posted to MFP on 8/9/13)

I've found myself at odds since I reached my first major goal - getting under 200 lbs. I was so focused on that goal that once I reached it, I didn't really know what to strive for next. Over the course of a couple of weeks I started sliding back into bad habits, not tracking, and just generally being lazy. Now I think it's because I didn't have a concrete goal to focus on next. So, I decided to pre-determine my specific goals - obviously the Main Goal is to lose weight, but I need weight-related milestones to keep me on track.

Lose 20 lbs - complete!
Get under 200 lbs - complete!
Get to 190
Get to 186
Get to 169
Get to 160
Get to 155
Get to 150
Get to 145
Get to 140
Get to 135
Get to 125
Get to 120

Some odd numbers, I know. I chose 186 because I had a frenemy that used to crow about her weight loss and time in the gym until everyone was sick to death of hearing about it. When she reached 187 it was 3 weeks of listening to her go on and on about her workouts, her food intake, and every last detail of her bodily functions to get to 187. The number always stuck in my head, so I figure if I get to 186 I can finally get that memory out of my head & thumb my imaginary nose at her!

 
I chose 169 because I weighed 170 after having my daughter, and it was the highest weight I had ever been at. After that, I only gained - I never got back under 170 and that was 18 years ago. So, once I get to 169 I will be at my lowest since 1995!!

 
The rest of these goals may change over time, for now they are just place-holders. But at least I've got them down!

To the weight loss surgery patient slider foods are the bane of good intentions and ignorance often causing dumping syndrome, weight loss plateaus, and eventually weight gain. Slider foods, to weight loss surgery patients, are soft simple processed carbohydrates of little or no nutritional value that slide right through the surgical stomach pouch without providing nutrition or satiation. The most innocent of slider foods are saltine crackers, often eaten with warm tea or other beverages, to soothe the stomach in illness or while recovering from surgery.
 
Understanding Slider Foods
The most commonly consumed slider foods include pretzels, crackers (saltines, graham, Ritz, etc.) filled cracker snacks such as Ritz Bits, popcorn, cheese snacks (Cheetos) or cheese crackers, tortilla chips with salsa, potato chips, sugar-free cookies, cakes, and candy. You will notice these slider foods are often salty and cause dry mouth so they must be ingested with liquid to be palatable. This is how they become slider foods. They are also, most often, void of nutritional value.
 
For weight loss surgery patients the process of digestion is different than those who have not undergone gastric surgery. When slider foods are consumed they go into the stomach pouch and exit directly into the jejunum where the simple carbohydrate slurry is quickly absorbed and stored by the body. There is little thermic effect in the digestion of simple carbohydrates like there is in the digestion of protein so little metabolic energy is expended. In most cases patients in the phase of weight loss who eat slider foods will experience a weight loss plateau and possibly the setback of weight gain. And sadly, they will begin to believe their surgical stomach pouch is not functioning properly because they never feel fullness or restriction like they experience when eating protein.
 
The very nature of the surgical gastric pouch is to cause feelings of tightness or restriction when one has eaten enough food. However, when soft simple carbohydrates are eaten this tightness or restriction does not result and one can continue to eat, unmeasured, copious amounts of non-nutritional food without ever feeling uncomfortable.
 
Many patients turn to slider foods for this very reason. They do not like the discomfort that results when the pouch is full from eating a measured portion of lean animal or dairy protein without liquids. Yet it is this very restriction that is the desired result of the surgery. The discomfort is intended to signal the cessation of eating. Remembering the "Protein First" rule is crucial to weight management with bariatric surgery.
 
Gastric bypass, gastric banding (lap-band) and gastric sleeve patients are instructed to follow a high protein diet to facilitate healing and promote weight loss. Bariatric centers advise what is commonly known among weight loss surgery patients as the "Four Rules" the most important of which is "Protein First." That means of all nutrients (protein, veggies, complex carbohydrates, then fat and alcohol) the patient is required to eat protein first.
Protein is not always the most comfortable food choice for weight loss surgery patients who feel restriction after eating a very small amount of food. However, for the surgical tool to work correctly a diet rich in protein and low in simple carbohydrate slider foods must be observed. The high protein diet must be followed even after healthy body weight has been achieved in order to maintain a healthy weight and avoid weight regain.

I found one of my trigger foods. It's spaghetti or more specifically pasta. My mom made some homemade spaghetti on Sunday (homemade as in, homemade from a jar, you know, the same line of thought as Olive Garden treats you like family). Really, Olive Garden treats you like family, I don't recall my mom ever presenting a bill at the end of a meal. But I digress.
 
Any way, I took the leftovers home with me. For supper, I ate my normal portion, and a few minutes later wanted another portion - even though my stomach was telling me I was stuffed to the top. I wanted it so bad that I would have cage wrestled a bear for another bowl.
 
It wasn't easy, but I stopped myself. The hardest part - and I can't believe it was so difficult to do - was to throw out the spaghetti. I kept telling myself that I could space out the spaghetti into several meals during the week. But, I knew if I left it in the house, I'd find some way to convince myself to eat more that eventing. There is a dog that trots through my yard daily, so he may be going into insulin shock today!
 
Only 1 other time have I wanted to eat something so bad - it was a banana laying in the fruit bowl. So adios spaghetti noodles, I'll eat you at mom's house, but you won't be coming home with me anymore.

Ok, it might not seem like much, but I weight my protein out every night at dinner.Tonight we had steak(one of my favorite cuts!), and I didn't finish my alotted 2.5 oz. This is a minor miracle as I always finish. I probably could have eaten it, but didn't want to feel uncomfortable so I put it in the fridge. I am impressed with myself, I never would have done that before my sleeve! Also my sister gave me some clothes mostly 1X's which I thought that I might fit into in a month or so but I tried them on anyways and they fit!!! And they were cotton blouses with no stretch in them. I was amazed as I can't really see a lot of difference yet, except in my neck(I now have one). So I guess even though I haven't lost a huge amount of weight yet(I'm at 38 lbs gone!), it does make a difference. Can't wait to see what happens next even though I've been on a stall for the last week.

Here's some tough love.....and sometimes we need to hear this.....still have 12 days of my pre-op, but want to make sure I can find this again 2 months down the road......soda = battery acid -- I like that! Thanks Doug for this post.
 
 
 
Source: Three Years Later - What I've Learned

Post-op life has been incredible so far. Even when I was in the hospital right after surgery, I was so positive. I was so thankful to the nurses, doctors and hospital staff - and I told them so endlessly - that many of them told me that I was the sweetest patient they'd had in a long time. Why? Because I was so thankful to be alive, to be doing okay (in pain, but no complications), to have them helping me, to know that IT WAS DONE... I just couldn't help but want to thank each of them so much for being there to help me through the hardest part (first few days post op). It was wonderful. Through all the pain and discomfort, I was guided by the idea that this is exactly what I wanted. I was exactly where I wanted to be. It was only gonna get BETTER from there.
 
And it has. SO MUCH!!!!
 
So, last Thursday was my 12 weeks post op.
 
My stats:
High weight: 459
Surgery date: 417
Today: 370.
 
In 11 more lbs, I'll be at 100lbs down. And my high weight is from November 2012, so in LESS THAN A YEAR (cuz I know 11lbs will be coming off soon) I will have lost 100lbs.
 
This surgery is my miracle. And I am an agnostic cynic who doesn't really believe in miracles.
 
At my highest weight, it was impossible for me to have any sense of fashion or feeling cute in clothes. All my pants had to be ordered online and were usually somewhat ill-fitting. Almost all my clothes were bought from catalogs because plus size store tops were just too snug, even in the highest size. About 6 yrs ago was the last time I was able to buy pants at a store. Tops were okay, but jeans/pants were too small. Well, now just about everything I have is way too big. So, I started pulling clothes out of "the archives" a few weeks ago. I had held on to some of my nicer work clothes from Lane Bryant from about 5-6 yrs ago when I could still fit in them. Now, even those are all getting too big. The smallest size I remember being in my adult life is 26/28 and 12 weeks post op IT'S TOO BIG. I still find it so hard to believe!
 
Well, I went clothes shopping this weekend. I waltzed into the Lane Bryant outlet and grabbed a pair of 28 jeans thinking "I'm sure all my old clothes are stretched out/worn in. So we'll see just how much more I have to lose before these brand new ones will fit", guessing that I'd get them pulled up but would have trouble buttoning them.
 
Wrong. More like "Um, Miss, can you get me a 26?" A 26!!!!!
 
And yes, I realize this is still big. I have a long way to go still, but just the idea of buying something in a store - something smaller than I would have bought even 5 years ago - it blows my mind!!! I got a bunch of cute tops in size 22/24 - and by the end of summer THOSE will be too big because they are already just a tiny bit big in the shoulder area.
 
Anyway, aside from the clothes shopping (which I always LOVED back when I could actually shop in stores, so it kinda made me giddy to be able to do it again!) - I also have some NSVs.
 
I've started parking on the 3rd floor in the parking garage at work. I was on the 2nd and would take the stairs every day. There are 5 floors, so I want to work my way up. Not sure how long it will take, but I just want to be able to do it!
 
I can cross my legs at the knee. My thighs are still so huge (UGH), but small enough that I can cross my legs, and I was NEVER really able to do that comfortably in my LIFE.
 
I moved my seat up in my car about 2 inches. Never thought that would be something I'd have to do because I'm almost 6 ft tall, but without my gut (well, with LESS of a gut) I felt a mile away from the steering wheel!
 
I no longer fear any chair. Sometimes arms with chairs were just too tight and I couldn't sit in them. Now, I don't have that problem. Next challenge - sitting in a booth at a restaurant!
 
this last one may sound snarky - but I have an overweight friend who's been acting a lil jealous of me lately because my weight loss is getting noticeable. I'm REALLLY close (if not already there, really), to being smaller than her. I've ALWAYS been the biggest friend. Always. I know that may sound petty - but I am just so sick of being the fattest person in my family, at work, in the store, of my friends - I have always been the fattest person... and now - I'm not! however that comes across, there is something about that fact that makes me proud of what I've accomplished!
 
And last but not least - I met a guy. He's a really good one, too - so far. I haven't shared all my secrets with him or anything, it's still really new. But I do thoroughly enjoy him and want to see where this could go. It's got some potential! I haven't had the confidence to date in YEARS, and I go on this one blind date and am lucky enough to meet a really great guy. Another miracle? I dunno. Maybe I've been overdue for some miracles in my life! lol
 
Anyway, that's about all I got to share at this point. Hope everyone else is doing well out there, too! <3 <3

It has been a while since I posted anything. I guess that is because there hasn't been too much to report. I just looked at my last post, and it was May 31, and I weighed 214. As of this morning, I weigh 199! I haven't been under 200 in at least 15 years. I'm only 9 lbs away from my doctor's goal of 190, and 19 lbs away from my goal of 180. I've lost a total of 75 lbs now. I thought I was losing quickly, but now that I think about it, 15 lbs in a month and a half isn't that quick. I want to be at or below my doctor's goal by my 6 month follow up. Guess I need to step it up!

I jogged for the first time today since last Sept. It felt SO good. It was immensely easier without the extra 50 lbs and I was hardly out of breathe. I feel so strong and powerful. I jogged 2 miles without stopping then walked the rest of the half mile home to cool down. Dear Husband bought the XBox work out program for me and it was fun to 'play' last night - especially with the boys cheering me on. I'm going to work on these flabby abs and arms and also try yoga to get more flexible. (Was a gymnast in another lifetime ions ago.) My legs are looking awesome and my husband is all about my 'new' body!
 
I'm down 31 since surgery, 50 since heaviest, only 2 lbs away from a huge, exciting mile stone - 200! I can't wait to be less than that tormenting number. I can't remember the last time I was below 200.
 
Going to a get-together with work friends in two days. They haven't seen me yet, so a bit nervous/excited. Don't have a clue what I'll wear. I want to go shopping, but I'm afraid this flabby belly will keep in a huge size.
 
I feel so optimistic for my future. My diabetes is basically GONE! The MS is behaving. I'm enjoying exercising again and I'm dealing with the food monster just fine. I'm going to recreate my body into what it should have been all these years. Life is good.

We got a treadmill, and today I had my first session, and it's also my 29th birthday! I burned 451 calories in an hour! I'm so stoked!!! I can't wait to continue working out in the mornings and seeing the inches melt off! Bonus, there is an ipod/mp3 jack and speakers so I can listen to my own music while I'm sweating away!! Makes it a billion times more effective! Lovin life, lovin my sleeve!!

Going to a party today where I will see people that I haven't since Christmas.
My surgery was in January and I have lost 96 pounds.
At Christmas my skirt/pant size was a 24. Tops were 24 to 28 or XXXL.
 
My sister bought me an adorable skirt and a sexy slamming blouse. Skirt size ---> 6 !!!!!!!!!!! The blouse is a plain MEDIUM. I cried and so did she. I kept looking at the tag on the skirt like it had to be wrong.
 
What a moment. I feel liberated and I feel like I have finally won the battle. I have no regrets going through with this operation. I am very glad I didn't have the bypass or the band. I feel very healthy.
 
Happy girl!! Have a good day everybody.

One month has flown by and I had my big weigh in at the doctors office, which I was excited to see what it would say. I am at 202 from 235! In one month I lost 33 pounds and have went down a size in pants and 1/2 a shoe size. I also was wearing a 2XL to now wearing some L. So glad I had this life changing surgery!

I vividly remember trying to find something patriotic to wear last 4th and being so frustrated that everything was too tight and looked awful. This year I'm wearing a cute red top and black short shorts and feeling good. Next year I hope to be wearing a nice sundress unselfconsciously.
 
We took a one month progress photo yesterday and compared it to one we took last Feb. when I was at my heaviest. I am awed by the difference. I think it hit me yesterday that this weight loss that I've been obsessing over for YEARS is finally happening.
 
I saw a friend at the parade who hadn't seen me since a week before the surgery and she was surprised at my loss. Wondering what it will be like going back to school in Aug., 6 weeks from now. Hoping I'll be down another 15 lbs. by then. Still haven't figured out what to tell the students. Losing 40 lbs in 10 weeks isn't exactly 'normal.'
 
I've developed an odd side effect - seriously dry, itchy skin. No matter how much or what kind of lotion I put on my face, I was awake half the night itching. I'm also concerned that as the fat exits my face, more wrinkles are showing up and making me look OLD! UGH! Well, dear husband doesn't seem to notice or hasn't said anything if he has. Love that man!
 
Well one month ago today I was being taking from post-op to my room and hating life, wanting to turn back time and change my decision. Today I'm well beyond that point and very happy with my choice to change my body in order to change my life.

I can cross my legs while sitting.
 
I stood up at church to pray, bowed my head and realized that all I could see was my boobs....no belly sticking out further than my boobs!
 
The steering wheel can be lowered while I drive.
 
I walked 3/4 of a mile today without panting and thinking I was having a heart attack.
 
I make still look like Shamu but I am feeling like Flipper!

I wasn't expecting to write any type of entry for week two, but this week has a big impact on my thought process.
 
Losing 22lbs in week 1 was amazing. I felt great! On top of the world! Ready to jump-start my new life! ...And then, it stopped. On day #7 the scale stopped moving. Now, I've researched this surgery soooo much and knew this was very likely. It seems many people have a stall around week 2-3. I thought I was prepared for this strange phenomena... But I was wrong. I had so many doubts this week. Would I ever lose the weight? Am I doing everything I'm supposed to do? Did I just have surgery to lose 22lbs? It was a terrible week.
And then I realized... This is completely normal. Not only not losing weight is normal, but also all these feeling are normal as well. It's easy to get discouraged when things don't go your way. It's easy to get angry or sad... But that's what this journey is about- it's about a fight to a better you. A physically better you AND an emotionally better you. It's about strength, determination, and learning.
To all you who are discouraged and down this week, pick up the pieces and keep on keeping on. This is all part of your story- the ups AND the downs. There are many times we will feel this way, down and depressed, but we just have to pick ourselves up, dust off, sip some water, and walk it off.
 

I had my first NSV today! Last night I went into my closet and tried on some of my size 24 pants that I haven't worn for 2 years. I knew that my size 26's were too big but never thought I was able to wear the 24's so soon. I wore them all day and even left the button done up all day. I feel great!!! On my surgery date I was 311 pounds. Now I am down to 289. I had a little bit of the stall I have heard everyone talking about and was worried, but have since realized that is okay. I am working out 3-4 times a week already and am being very active.

I'm into week 3 and I'm 21 lbs down since surgery 40 since my heaviest. Eating less than 1/4 of a cup of food at meals, which doesn't amount to many calories, so still struggling with fatigue. BUT - I am walking a mile now in my 30 minutes of required daily walking. (PITIFUL, I know, since I used to jog 3 miles in 45 minutes.)
 
So I called the nurse to ask when I can swallow pills again and found out I have 3 more weeks of the nasty liquid/chewable crap. She shared with me that I really HAVE to get the 60 grams of protein in a day OR ELSE my hair will start falling out. So now I'm serious. Back to the gross protein drinks.
 
Thinking about going to Goodwill to find some shorts since mine are about to fall off. HOORAY!
 
My belly STILL looks like a train wreck, but oh well, I'll not be wearing a bikini anytime soon.
 
And I think I might have found a shoulder under all my vanishing fat!
 
Looking forward to finding a WAIST eventually.

I feel great physically. Emotionally, still struggling. I am definitely a food addict. I had no idea. In my mind, I catch myself thinking about food....like all the time. I miss cheese crackers, popcorn at the movies, toast and bacon. I miss sharing a cookie with the grand baby. I miss trips with the kids to Braums ice cream. I long for a Dairy Queen chocolate malt. Furthermore, i crave McDonald's french fries and homemade brownies. I cannot wait to eat a ribeye and baked potato (just a bite). You get the picture. I am in detox with a full, unlocked liquor cabinet in front of me. (Actually the food pantry...)
 
I took the kids to see Monster's University and knew it would be hard, but had no idea how hard. The smell of hot buttered popcorn assaulted me before I even entered the door. It threw me to the floor like a rag doll. I fought it, yelling and screaming. We drew quite a large crowd, that deadly aroma and me. The mouth watering scent drug me across the floor to the concession stand. I fought so hard I left claw marks in the tile. I gathered myself, stood up, smiled at the young woman with her mouth gaping and ordered a LARGE popcorn and 2 large cokes. As she placed the humongous container of butter dripping popcorn on the counter, I grabbed it and slung it at my children before I changed me mind. Whew! My stomach growled the entire movie like I hadn't eaten in weeks. Oh, maybe because I HAVEN'T! I quietly drank my water and watched the movie. I survived! I did it!
 
Last night, I found myself in the emergency room with a friend. I brought my water and some baby food but didn't plan on camping out for hours. I knew I had to have something. I sniffed out the vending machines hoping to find something edible for me. I dreaded the sight of Reese's peanut butter cups, snickers, cinnamon rolls and chips. My mind kept screaming that peanut butter is high in protein and soft, hence the peanut butter cups would be the best choice. It sounded reasonable to me. Once I located the vending machines, I stood frozen in shock. EVERYTHING in the machine was healthy or relatively healthy. Not even a hint of chocolate was to be found. I opted for a 100 calorie breakfast thin thing. I chewed it like it was leather so not to disturb my stomach. I survived.
 
I am still refusing to allow bacon to be cooked in my house. I think I would go into convulsions. There is a no baking anything sweet ban till further notice as well. My 12 year old asked me today, "How much longer are you on this diet?" I just smiled and hugged him.
 
Signing off till next time!
 
Judy

Consume Adequate Protein (Minimum: Women 80 to 100 grams / Men 100 to 120 grams)
Eat and Don’t Drink your calories (Except Protein Shakes)
Stay Hydrated (Minimum of 64 oz of Water)
Cut out Sugar, Sweet N’ Low, Aspartame, and Splenda (Stevia is good or
Eat Your Fruit and Veggies
Consume Small Amounts of Good Fats Frequently
Choose the Right Carbohydrates and Always Eat them Last (Protein then Veggies then Good Carbs if you aren’t 80% Full)
Eat 3 Small High Protein Meals and 2 High Protein Snacks Daily (2 to 4 oz. per meal every 3 to 4 hours)
Eat Slowly, Chew Food Thoroughly and Stop Eating at 80% Full
Take all your Required Bariatric Advantage Vitamins/Minerals Daily

 

Bariatric Advantage Multivitamin (Either 3 Capsules twice daily or 2 Chewable per day)
Bariatric Advantage Calcium Citrates Chewy Bites (1000 mg per day – Take 2 hours before or after any iron containing supplements. Can be divided into 500 mg doses)
Bariatric Advantage Iron (Females 29 mg, Males 18 mg – take 2 hours before or after calcium supplements.
Bariatric Advantage Sublingual B12 (Dissolve 1 tablet under the tongue daily) OR have Bariatric Dr write a prescription that you take once a week.
Bariatric Advantage Vitamin D3 – 5000 units (Take 1 capsule daily)
SPECIAL NOTE: They highly suggest Bariatric Advantage because they not only meet the requirements, but are one of the few companies to test that the product work correctly in your body).
 
He also suggested that I take Krill Oil 1000 mg a day and Juice Plus if I can afford it.
 
1. Bariatric Advantage Vitamins/Minerals & Meal Replacements, KetogenX protein supplements (bars
and crisps) and Nectar Protein Powder
2. Quest Protein Bars available at www.questnutrition.com/bariatricrd
3. Juice Plus® available at http://www.kylefjuiceplus.com/
4. Vital Choice Krill Oil available at www.vitalchoice.com
5. Just Like Sugar™ (healthy sugar substitute) available at http://www.justlikesugarinc.com/

Day 11 was another good day. I'm feeling good and very satisfied with my weight loss. Since surgery, I've lost 17.2 pounds and 65 pounds since May 1. The most interesting aspect so far in my journey is the lack of hunger since surgery. I really don't have any hunger and have to think about eating on schedule. I've heard some people comment about the lack of hunger, but I never expected this.
 
This past weekend I took three guys (including my 18 year-old son) to Wilfire Weekend in Greenville, SC. It was a great Christian experience and afforded me the opportunity to walk. I felt better walking than I have in a long time and didn't find myself short of breath. Then to top it off, my son commented that on Saturday he saw me from the side and could see a real difference. Made my day!

Well, I hit ONEDERLAND on June 6th, and have dropped another 3 pounds since then. It feels great to know that those #s are behind me, and will be gone for the rest of my life now. I'm 6 pounds away from hitting 50# total loss post-op.
It's a great feeling being more active, wanting to work out, knowing that each healthy choice I make is finally actually making a difference in my end weight...whereas before it felt like all work and no pay off. I'm so glad I made this decision for myself, there has not been one day of regret so far.
My sisters and my dad are all talking about having the surgery now too, which makes me feel good, like I made the right choice- and they can see the positive changes it's made in my life- and they want it too.
My size 14 jeans are literally falling off of me, but I HATE to buy new jeans, knowing soon enough- they're going to be too big too...random, isn't it?!
 
Just wanted to check in, I told myself that I'd blog as much as I could on this journey to keep folks informed, and maybe someone out there deciding on the surgery will be able to see this thing through from my perspective, and it'll help them make their own decisions.

I am a little over a week post-op and I am feeling great. The biggest change I feel is real strength around food. I was hardcore addicted and now my relationship with it feels so much closer to normal.
 
This weekend my father in law baked homemade cookies while I was visiting. He loves baking and in the past I would have obsessed over them. The smell, then my thoughts would be consumed with "Should I eat one? No, I'm too fat I need to stop...but I deserve one...everyone gets the have them why deprive myself?" Then I would go eat 5 or 6 and send the rest of the night feeling guilty and beat myself up. Certainly no way to live!
 
This weekend I smelled them an thought...oh that smells good. The end. No obsessing, no guilt...the cookies just rolled off my back. It is just so empowering. This really needs to stay. It freed my mind to think about life, family, the future etc... I am just thrilled I made this decision and need my strength to last.
 
Things are looking up!

First time to ever blog! Today is clear fluids only and is the only day that I had to do it pre-op. Tomorrow is surgery day! Have to be at the hospital around 2:30pm. I am ready to be healthy not only for myself, but my three kids, husband and body! I can't wait to see what the future holds for me and my beautiful family!
 
 
Carla

Thanks to everyone for their kind words and encouragement. I've lost 6 lbs on the liquid diet and I'm still 7 days away from surgery. I made it through the graduation and party without 'cheating' but it was the leftovers yesterday when it was just my immediate family that did me in - a snuck a bit of walking taco, potato salad and of course cake. AND it showed on the scale today! I'm forgiving myself and starting new today. It's surprisingly hard to get 1200 calories in a day with just liquid. I'm thrilled with myself, honestly, who knew I actually had WILL POWER! My family was feeling sorry for me, but I don't feel sorry for myself at all - I'm just so darn excited about the new me that is taking over! This time next week I'll be done with surgery and hopefully out of recovery, in my room (NOT dry-heaving) and looking forward to my new life as a healthy person.

Hello! I just joined this site. My surgery is scheduled for May 30, 2013 and it has been a wild ride getting here. I say wild ride because I just made the decision to get surgery on the morning of April 29th. I researched getting surgery about 4 years ago, but I decided against it because I viewed it as a "failure". I am 42 with a BMI of 46. I have high blood pressure, arthritis in my knees, PCOS, and IBS. That morning I woke up and decided that I had done 42 years in a big body and I was going to do the next 42+ in a different body. I just got tired of carrying myself around.
 
 
When I got to work that morning I called my insurance company to find out the places that were in-network and then I went online to learn everything I could possibly need to know. When I thought about surgery 4 years ago I thoulght I wanted the Lap Band, but since then I have changed careers and I travel frequently. I just didn't like the idea of having that band inside me as I get on a pressurized airplane every week so I started researching the sleeve. By the end of the day I had contacted the surgeon's office, viewed the online seminar, filled out the initial paperwork, and scheduled an appointment for the next Monday.
 
 
The appointment went well and I needed to get nutrition counseling and a psych eval. I called the nutritionist from the car and scheduled an appointment for Thursday and I already had an appointment with my therapist for Friday. Completed both appointments and the letter was submitted to my insurance the next Tuesday. On Friday I was approved. Whew!! Even typing that made me tired. The next day I went for a pre-op group session where we toured the hospital and learned all of the details of the surgery day. And here I am today joining this site.

Today is the day that i saw so far off in the distance 4 months ago. A day where I would exhale and quietly rejoice with myself. A day where I found contentment in myself that I haven't had in many years.
 
I rushed around to get ready for work this morning....I was running VERY late. Before I grabbed my purse I stepped on the scale, somewhat blah, and had a little surprise. I was 199.8! Time stopped at that moment as I stood there staring. I slowly stepped off the scale and just stood there. Alone in the bathroom I took a moment to be thankful. Thankful that my surgery was even an option, and thankful that my body took so well to it. After today I am going to continue all the work that it took to get to this point. I now know today, how strong of a person it takes to have WLS. I feel like I have accomplished so much more than just smaller numbers on a scale. I gained confidence, contentment, and healthy knowledge.