Today is a bad day physically. My right leg is in a great deal of pain. My knee feels like it has an extremely tight band wrapped around it. I can barely bend it and walking is very difficult. And my calf is radiating pain down to my foot. ( vascular) Yesterday I felt pretty good overall and I was able to go grocery shopping. I spent extra time looking at things and reading labels, which kept me on my feet longer. So needless to say I am paying for it today. I do not fathom how people live with chronic pain for years. While my knee has been pretty bad for a few years now, it was manageable. I could stay off my leg, ice or apply heat and take meds to keep the pain down. But since I can no longer take my anti inflammatory medication ( due to taking warfarin) the pressure and pain has gotten out of control. And add to that my new pain from vascular swelling...It is more than I can take almost. I am at the end of my rope so to speak. If I do not get this weight off and get some relief I could very easily end up much worse off. I would either become a pill popper with pain meds ( I can take those, just not the stuff that will actually HELP my leg!) or a cripple. Neither is an option as a single parent of a four year old. That is my main reason for turning to bariatric surgery. I need it. I have so much empathy for those who have pain that there is no cure or treatment for. Losing weight won't "cure" me, but I have no doubt it will vastly improve my situation. On the plus side, I have been making changes I need to for success in my future. Yesterday I started eating a lot less, making sure it was full of protein while low in fat, calories and carbs. This is how life will be post op, so might as well get used to it now. And any weight loss I achieve from changing now is just a step closer to where I need to be!
