Indigo1991

It's the simple things that have the biggest impact :-)))). Well done to you too

Stand back and prepare for the stampede by those of us who recognise this behaviour! But, this time you are owning it and the weekend isn't even over yet. So maybe it's not going to be the same as what's happened before? We all get it wrong from time to time and the old ways break through. But that's life, we stay vigilant and we deal with being human. So, put this behind you, dust yourself down and jump back on the wagon. You know what to do. And you have loads of support on here. You haven't failed, you had a moment and you will only do long term harm if you do it again tomorrow - and the day after - and the day after. You get the picture. Good luck, you are almost half way there, well done

Oh no! I have what another sleever described as a sharpei butt - like the dog, all saggy and wrinkly :-(

Seela, rather than run away, PM the people in question and apologise. If the site is helping you, you need to be on it. But the lesson is - think before you post, be sure of what you say - and don't make excuses for ur actions. You may think you weren't the only one but that doesn't make what you said to someone in crisis right.... Own it and move on, you made a mistake, be more thoughtful in future. Good luck.

I think there's a huge connection between weight gain/failure to lose for some of us. I could justify my lack of interest from my ex because of my weight and pretend things were otherwise ok - they weren't. Once we separated, my weight kept me from looking for a new relationship or even casual dating. It was a physical barrier and I think I subconsciously didn't want to lose it. It kept the world away from me. When I started to feel better about me, I didn't want to be ill (I had 2 comorbidities including diabetes) or fat any more. I didn't want to be hidden. So, while starting dating frightens me, it's also exciting. It's not just that I am ready to meet someone new, it also signals that I feel good about me, no need to hide :-)

Thanks for all the suggestions. Not in a rush to drink but now have some ideas of what I might try. Might try it at home first in case I get the instant tipsy thing and see how long it takes to go. Am now a very cheap date - 1 drink and a starter sized portion of food and I'll be done :-))))))

Globetrotter, now thinking about grilled cheese - oh dear! Forgot about port, that might be nice..... Erp, I am ashamed to admit it but despite being Scottish, whisky and I don't get on. Just a sniff goes straight to my head but Fireball sounds fab!

Don't forget to breathe, lol. I am so excited for you, good luck. Everyone's different, first couple of weeks can be tough - but nothing you won't be able to handle. You sound like a down to earth, organised girl, take the same attitude to being sleeved and you will succeed. As for your husband, he's watching all of this and probably feels helpless, so you are getting all of his fears off loaded on to you. But I bet he will be supportive post op. Let us know how you are once you have joined us on the sleeved side :-))))

I totally get what you are saying! Eating out has taken on a new perspective for me - I choose carefully because, whatever I eat, I want to enjoy and savour it. The size of portion is now irrelevant. Never thought of it like this, but it really is liberating :-)

All sounds pretty normal :-) The day after I was cleared to eat solid food, that's exactly what I did, tried to have 3 meals of normal foods. And was disappointed that I couldn't fit a lot of it in! Your stomach doesn't know you are now eating normal foods, it's just going about it's business healing and digesting what it gets. So take it slowly and build up the amounts and types of solid foods you introduce, It needs time to readjust so don't cram it, it will have some swelling to lose and healing to do. The best advice I got was to chew, chew some more and when you think you can't chew any more - chew again. That really does help you get Protein in without it being painful or blocking your stomach with chunks of food. And try to eat one new thing a day to check tolerance. It will and it does get easier. Just hang in there :-) Your weight loss is impressive so you are doing things right...

SoccerGirl88, agree with all GG says ( as usual!) but can I add one thing - the guy sounds like a self- opinionated arse... All he needed to tell you was that he enjoyed meeting you but he didn't feel it was a long term thing. Why go in to so much detail if he wasn't interested??? His comments tell you all you need to know about him- and I think you had a narrow escape :-))))) Has my second date yesterday. First guy I met online and he was the one who told me at the end of the night there was no spark before I could say a word!!!! Second guy I met in a bar as a friend of a friend. We had lunch and a lovely afternoon, lots in common. But this time, I wasn't feeling it! Have told him he's great but not right for me - I didn't put it on to him, I let him know it's me, that there's nothing he could do different and that some girl is going to get very lucky. Might not make him feel much better (he was keen) but I was honest but not hurtful. Hang in there with the dating and try to let things slide over you. We might have to kiss a few frogs but, hey, there could be a prince among them lol!!!!

Happy Camper, you have laid out exactly what you need to do to get back on track - stick to the original plan in terms of what you eat, get moving again and get your liquids in. And get back on the scale regularly. At the moment, I would weigh weekly until you see it going down. Daily will just keep shoving the numbers in your face - and that won't motivate you. Look forward to what's possible not back at what you have done. You have come on here and admitted what you have done and the result. That's brave, you deserve support. You have lost weight successfully before so you know exactly what to do .... just don't get overwhelmed, everything is possible. Remember the old adage - how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time :-))))

As some of you know, I separated from my ex three years ago after 30 years together. Only plucked up the courage to have a first date three months ago, which was three months after surgery. Biggest issue was he had same name as ex, so he became G2. Was ok but not great experience. After first date, he told me there was no romantic spark then after date 2, he decided there was and got keen! However, after that, and him wearing denim cut offs to a nice restaurant for Sunday lunch (oh dear), I quietly put him to one side and haven't seen him since. He occasionally texted but I was cool and made excuse after excuse not to see him. All went quiei about four weeks ago so I thought that was that. Recently met a nice guy and we have a date in a week's time (even typing thst makes me hyperventilate, lol). You couldn't make it up but he has the same name as ex too, so he's G3! But out of the blue, G2 texted last night to ask me out to the cinema. I don't want to go and thought he had already got the message that I am not interested. But I actually don't know how to tell him that without being too blunt or hurting him.... Thoughts/tips/form of words for this clueless woman would be greatly appreciated.... :-))))

Clinically, sleeve surgery is regarded as major as it involves cutting and removing most of a significant organ. Breast reduction surgery may be extensive but it doesn't traumatise the body to the same extent so isn't regarded as major. So says the cosmetic surgeon doing my boobs, in response to my concerns about not being able to afford any more hair loss! Sleeve hair loss is as a result of trauma of surgery and a sharp sudden drop in Protein... but that knowledge doesn't really help as u watch ur hair fall out....It does pass, just try not to stress :-)

Suzanne, your comment that this is a lifestyle change not a diet has such resonance. That has been my goal from the outset - to improve my health, lose weight but not diet. I was very successful as a failed dieter so I wanted to change the record! The sleeve has given me a partner to do this with, whether as a tool or something to lean on. And it works for me without compromising my ability to get on and live life "normally". No dieting and a feeling of control that I have never had before. So thank you, - to hear that 5 years on you are living such a great life inspires and encourages me. When Emile Zola (I think) was asked what she was on this earth to do, she simply said "to live out loud". I hope you continue to live out loud for many years to come. X

Please don't eat anything that u shouldn't as there are reasons why u are on liquids at this time. Your stomach is swollen and healing but is numb. So eating any solids is risky as u may not feel damage being done. Feeling hungry could actually be acid not hunger - if u haven't got acid inhibitor meds, PPLs, ask ur doc. There have been a number of threads on how to get protein in without shakes in the early weeks. Do a search, you will find some great advice. I wasn't able to drink shakes, I used fortified milk (skimmed milk with added milk powder) to add to soups, to drink on its own, to water down yog etc to get protein in - and it has worked for me :-) Hang in there, lots of us were where u are, just don't rush to solid goods too soon - this is a marathon not a sprint and u need to give ur body time to recover. Good luck!

Being overweight physically covers our bodies with fat, hiding our natural shape. It also hides us emotionally and mentally, not only from others but ourselves too. So when we lose weight, as well as revealing new bodies, we uncover ourselves again. That's what's happening to you. I may appear to have changed with my weight loss, but I am now just who I was inside all along. The fat barrier kept me from really being me but no more! Life is too short to live a lie or to live only for others. Making changes will be hard but nothing worth having comes easy. Good luck, this too will pass and life will be as it should be for you :-)

Yup, you can do it, never had a Protein shake yet that likes me or vice versa! Know what your best protein options as and, asRJ's/Beginning says, be creative in where you find your protein so that it doesn't get boring and that you can get it all in. To avoid the constipation problem, I kept on top of drinking my Water and would exceed the minimum required - fingers crossed, managed to avoid constipation... But yes, you can do this without shakes... for me, it meant I could continue with normal life, including eating out, from early on.

Congratulations, now the fun begins! :-)

Chase30, good solid advice! I have a date on Sunday with a divorced, non-smoking guy, who's fit (in every sense!) and is more in tune with the me that's 6 months out than the person I was at 10 weeks out. My view of myself has changed significantly (or maybe my view of what I want in life has changed and I won't settle for less than I deserve) and, as a result, I am clearer about what I am looking for in a guy...

You look AMAZING! Congratulations !

Lipstick, pmsl, could just imagine this! I love that it is all still so exciting for you and that you aren't laid back about your NSVs. I wake up every day with a smile on my face - and some days I just dance round the house cos I love my sleeve and cos I can now dance without a bit of me seizing up

Tikva, spot on! I intend to be direct otherwise he will just come back like a boomerang. Thanks for the words of wisdom.

It has come as quite a shock to me too I have never succeeded at anything weight related until now. And I can't believe how calm and convinced I am that this is a way of living I can maintain.

Well, being married might not stop them if you are looking hot, lol!!! It is nice getting a bit of attention, as an old unmarried woman