LipstickLady

No, you won't. Stay away. Far far away.

Even funnier are those by people who have. I do realize that when people research surgery, they may not research all the varieties (or even their own!!), so of course there may be misunderstandings, but when other WLS patients spout off "facts" about surgery with no real basis for their beliefs, I've got to laugh. It's been an epidemic around here lately, so let's see which "facts" we can debunk. **DISCLAIMER. I am NOT an expert on anyone but me. I had sleeve surgery. I am confident that I can not talk about bypass, bands, balloons, revisions, switches, etc. with any personal knowledge. This thread is for sh!ts and giggles only.** Sleeves do not "grow back". I know the whole stretching thing is debatable but I can say without a doubt, they don't grow. And yes, there is a difference. You cannot feel your staples through your skin. If you can, you've lost far too much weight and should seek immediate medical attention. If you have a sleeve, you do NOT have a pouch. liquid will not stretch your sleeve no matter what kind of liquid it is. Liquid runs through a sleeve quickly. You can eat around your sleeve (I did it yesterday), so you do have to be forever mindful of this tool you now possess. Your way is not the ONLY way nor is MY way. Neither are the BEST way, either. There are a lot of different roads, hopefully they all end up at the same destination. You cannot/will not poop out your staples. Really.

I'd slap that a$$ every time you walked by.

Here ya go!

Tell that to my sore bum. If it's not the staples, then what is it?? Your move, know it all. In the dark, could your significant other confused the "restroom" with the "snack bar"? Evolution was not always a good architect. OH NO YOU DIDN'T!!! BAAAAHHAHAAAAAAA!! I am totally quoting this little gem so your 120 minutes don't pass without record of this remark!!!! Still waiting for @@Babbs to come in here and see this.

This is SO absolutely normal. I have no idea why, but this was my biggest complaint for about 6 months post op. My NP says this is one of the complaints she hears most often, too, so... I balanced it out by exercising more so that my body was tired, taking a warm bath right before bed, shutting off all electronics two hours before bed, blah blah blah. None of that worked. What worked was 1/2 Xanax and/or a small glass of wine once I was cleared for alcohol. And yes, my quack doctor was fine with it.

I lost over 100 pounds eating meat and veggies. And cheese. Oh my goodness, do I love cheese.

MMMMMMMMmmmmm. Dead animal here, land or sea. My favorite is flank steak with grilled onions and peppers, but tonight it's going to be salmon, salad and angry edamame. Shrimp, scallops, chicken, burger, steak, sausages, hot dogs... I usually skip any potato or macaroni salad because they fill me up so fast and make me feel crappy. Same with buns. I do eat cole slaw and a bit of fruit, though, and three bean salad is one of my favorites. Grilled veggies make me very happy, especially asparagus, mushrooms, tomatoes, YUM. I make an awesome Pasta salad that is super easy. I coarsely chop red pepper, carrots, broccoli, cucumber, and add grape tomatoes and very finely diced vidalia onion to al dente' bowtie pasta. Stir in some quality mayo and dump in a bottle of Ken's Vidalia Onion salad dressing. A bit of garlic powder, pepper and the main ingredient? A good amount of Old Bay seasoning. I dislike old bay seasoning but it's exactly perfect for this recipe. To make this pasta salad more of a meal than a side, add in some cooked baby shrimp and artificial crab leg. Let it sit over night to let the flavors blend. You may have to add more vidalia dressing if it needs moistening. I generally just eat the veggies and seafood out of the above salad but it's OH SO GOOD. My family loves it and it's the dish all my friends request at BBQs. I usually leave out the shrimp and crab when I take it places because people are weird about seafood, myself included. I am not a huge sweets eater so while I will have an occasional cookie or cupcake, I don't HAVE to have it. That said, no BBQ is complete without ice cold beer. And dead animal.

First and foremost, stop squeezing it. You are most likely reopening any healing that is being done. I'm sure it's fine.

Nope. Still you and @@KindaFamiliar I've been using the same straw for over 23 years. I've put a lot of work into training it and I am quite sure I don't have the energy or attention span to start over.

Check A slight curve does hit "the spot", though.

Have you called your surgeon? I was put on an anti nausea pill and a pill from tummy spasms for my first three months because I couldn't keep anything down. I also have a slight stricture so pills would get stuck and I had trouble moving through my food phases. Stick to liquids for now if you have to. It's not uncommon for WLS patients to be on liquids for three weeks post op. I was. My pureed stage was week three through 6, but again, I moved very slowly. Protein drinks, SF pudding and Popsicles, Gatorade mixed with water (unless you can tolerate G2), and as much water as you can handle. Walk. A LOT. Take your PPI. Call your surgeon about your vitamins, pain and eating plan as these were just suggestions based on MY experience. It will get better.

I like my straws with girth.

Rapid weight loss can start the flow. I was deep in rag central for my surgery. Doctor said it was common.

You must be bypass because sleevers don't have pouches.

You called? Yes, thank you. Oh the fun that could be had in a padded room... A RUBBER room. Ha! I crack myself up.

You two needs to get a room. Preferably padded. And white.

Seventeen pounds in two weeks. Yup. You're definitely a slow loser.

Two teenagers here, too. I didn't have a problem cooking post op but when I didn't feel like it, they were perfectly capable of making PB&J or Cereal. I found it easiest (on me) to cook things they love but I don't care for so it wasn't at all tempting. (Who wants pancakes? Blech.) I will say that you need to set aside your own cabinet and drawer in the fridge. Three years later and my family still knows not to touch anything in MY area. Yes, my leftover sushi looks delish. Yes, I know you love edamame. Yup. Those are the Protein bars you like. Oh, you finished your beef Jerky and forgot to add it to the list? Sucks for you! Hate to be greedy, but.... And speaking of lists. I don't eat cereal and milk any more so if we are out, I am clueless. I don't eat bread, so if they don't put it on the grocery list, I'm not buying it. They are out of goldfish or chips? Write it or don't. If I don't know, I can't help you. Because I eat very little of the same snacky foods they do, I don't know what's in the pantry. And no, I won't run out right now because you forgot to tell me. Sorry about your luck!

Whuuuu.....??? Did I miss a post where someone told YOU what to do? Did I miss a post that was directed at you in this thread? Perhaps it was somewhere else. If you took a moment to read this thread (I'm assuming you didn't...I HOPE you didn't), you would see that this was all in fun. Yeesh!

Tick tock.

Oh, it's MUCH better. Congratulations!

I'd have a million bucks as my annual income and my own private island, too.