LipstickLady

So yesterday I was at the grocery and I grabbed a hand basket thinking I was only getting a few things. A few turned into a bunch and my basket was quite heavy about halfway through the market. I hefted my basket up onto my hip (which used to be quite ample) and it slid right down my leg. Hmmm.... I tried again. And again. I seriously couldn't figure out WHY my basket didn't rest comfortably on my side like it always has. It took about 3 minutes of pondering this phenomenon before I realized I no longer have big wide cushiony hips on which to rest whatever it is I might need to carry. I seriously chortled with glee startling the produce man. HA! Last week I had a girls' weekend away with my besties. We loaded up the luggage cart with all our stuff and I took my usual place behind the cart as the one who is designated to push it through the lobby. (I'm the only one who can be trusted not to mow innocent people down.) I couldn't budge it. I pushed and I heaved and I shoved that cart and it wouldn't move. I pulled it with all my might. Nope. One hundred plus pounds less of me wasn't going to move it no matter how hard I tried. So bizarre. The ocean was another weird experience for me. I was a lifeguard growing up, both ocean and pool. I am a swimmer and I was even at my fattest. This summer was my first summer in 20+ years "thin". I was tossed around like a rag doll, totally off balance, barely able to gain footing because there is so much less of me. Oh, and I no longer float like I used to. In fact, I sink like a stone unless I give it a whole lotta effort. SO SO not what I'm used to. I love the NSVs like fitting in a theater seat with my purse next to me, shopping in any store, passing by people in narrow aisles without rubbing them with my butt, etc. but some of these off the wall things really throw me off guard and it takes me a while to figure out what the heck is going on. You?

I ate crab cakes. And crab legs. Yum!

Nah... I didn't/don't push through any pain. I'm a wuss. It doesn't bother me unless I drink it straight from a new bottle so I don't. Also, carbonation does NOT stretch the stomach. Overfilling your stomach regularly stretches your stomach. A sleeved stomach only has so much it will stretch, too. At 17 months out, I can almost eat a cup of food. My Nut and surgeon say that's probably going to be my max.

I don't believe in being doomed nor does my NUT, thankfully. I drink soda, I am not doomed. I am a few pounds above my stretch goal weight but I am healthy as a horse, I make great nutritional choices 90% of the time, I log my meals, I exercise. I have a three pound bounce range that my body has settled into quite comfortably. I'm good. Definitely not doomed. HA!

@@Alex Brecher Yeesh, fella! Have you not learned to make an "Other" choice? I drink caffeine all day long. I did give it up for two months pre-op and about 6 months post op. It's my understanding that doctors limit caffeine because it's a diuretic and it's hard enough for WLS patients to get their fluids in. It's my understanding that the acid in coffee and soda is what tears the stomach apart, not the caffeine.

I was a Coke Zero "addict". I could easily drink a 2 liter a day. I gave it up about 2 months pre-op and didn't drink it at all for my first 6 or seven months post op. When I did try it again, the bubbles made me very uncomfortable -- overly full and as if I had a weight sitting on my chest. Now I have some Coke Zero almost every day. I can only drink it poured over ice and stirred a bit. I CANNOT drink it from the bottle or can. I love getting a large fountain drink with a lot of ice and sipping it over the day. It's not ideal, my doctor doesn't love it, and I do not recommend it. That said, it doesn't make me crave other foods, it helps me get my liquids down, my doc gave me a sort of ok, but only if I drink decaf, so I indulge a bit. If it's my biggest vice, so be it.

Thank you.

If I was diabetic, I MAY have leaned towards the bypass because it cures it very quickly. If your diabetes is pretty controllable and losing weight will do it, the sleeve is still a good option. The knee, back and sleep issues should be resolved or helped a lot with weight loss so either will work there. Another reason I chose sleeve? I hate taking pills. I knew I wouldn't take all the Vitamins a bypass requires so that was a big no for me.

How far out are you? Are you at solid foods? I ate/eat a lot of Beans. Refried pinto or black with cheese. If I am feeling fancy, I add guacamole. Crab legs and crab cakes were an easy food for me at first. Shrimp was a bit hard but if I chopped it into seafood salad, it was great. Browned crumbled ground beef was great, with tomato sauce and cheese. I could eat chicken salad or tuna if it was mashed to death. Think about Soups, too. Bisque is yummy as is chili and beef stew. I love white chicken chili and ham and bean Soup. The only thing I like about the colder weather is all the soups on their way. Meatloaf is good, meatballs are good. I only use 85/15 now as dry meat gags me. Salsbury steak with onions. YUM. It took me about 8 months before I could eat "whole" chicken and even now at 17 months, I still have trouble with it at times. I can chop it, add a lot of gravy and it's better. Teeny bites and eat slow. I have a stricture so I was really slow to move to each stage and I still vomit from time to time. It's all in how fast I eat and how big my bite is.

What are your fears about either? Do you have co-morbidities? Do you have any close friends who have had either?

I chose the sleeve because I had no medical reason to need bypass. I was healthy with no co-morbidities. I was active so it wasn't imperative that I lose the weight as quickly as possible. I didn't want the higher risk of dumping that is often associated with bypass, nor did I love the idea of my intestines being rerouted. With the sleeve, I knew that I would most likely be able to eat whatever I wanted within moderation. (WRONG! Bread sticks like a b!tch, rice and Pasta make me vomit as does high quality ice cream but I am OK with it. It keeps me on track.) I felt like this surgery was less invasive and I loved the idea of the little grehlin factory b eing shut down, even if temporary. I love my sleeve. I am thrilled that I did it. The sleeve was the best choice for ME, but I would never tell you what's best for you.

What do I miss....? I truly do miss being able to drink with my meals. I love spicy foods and salty foods and if I don't wait at least 45 minutes after eating to drink, I am completely uncomfortable and will most often vomit. I also miss ... uhm ... yeah nothing. Oh wait. Wine. I miss it. It gives me terrible heartburn. What don't I miss? There is nothing about being fat that I ever want to go back to. Zip, nada, zilch.

It's OK to be curious. It's a long road of "bad" food choices that have gotten many of us to the need for WLS in the first place. I was fortunate to be at a point in my life where I was thoroughly sick of being fat. I resigned myself to the idea that I had eaten more than my share of crap over my 42 years and if I was never able to eat XXX again, so be it, as long as I regained my health. Now I eat what I want. I make great choices most of the time and when I don't, I eat just a few bites of whatever that indulgence might be. I don't feel guilty, I don't feel "bad", I don't beat myself up. I am an adult and I am aware enough to know what works for me and what doesn't. As stated above, none of those foods are "bad". I have had a bite or more of all of those. I don't tolerate pasta or rice well and the crust from pizza sticks terribly. I have actually come to a point where I don't even WANT more than a teaspoon or two of things that are bready/doughy or contain rice/pasta. It's my thought that if I tell myself never again, I will fail. On the other hand, some people know if they try it, they will fall down a slippery slope. Only YOU can decide. Some foods make me sick, some make me poop Soup, some make me vomit. I can't tell you what will work or not work for you nor can anyone else. Small bites, chew well and stick to your doc's plans. Eventually you will be able to experiment.

250?!? Just smile, nod and do what you want, no discussion needed.

I agree @jersrose43. I've never advocated making up a story about a fake surgery or any other falsehood. What's getting me ruffled is the idea that simply keeping the matter private is also a "lie". I feel the most for the newbies who are struggling with this decision and who are reading this. Why should they feel shamed into telling something they may not want to disclose? How dare ANYONE try to talk their right to privacy away? Funny thing about keeping a secret. Once you tell, you can't take it back if you discover that telling was a bad idea. You can always tell later if you choose to keep it private now. Funny that.

I'm a moderator in here, too, but I see no reason to shut anything down. I'm a big girl. I can take being called names because I am standing up for my right to privacy. . I certainly won't be bullied into changing my view. I'm far too old for that.

Again with the disrespectful name calling and ill conceived accusations. Weren't you the one calling for respect? It's bizarre to me that I am 100% supporting your decision to tell the world about your choices, yet if I disagree with your opinion and choose to keep my decision private, I am a hater, liar, untruthful, etc.

Absolutely! That said, her point could have been made without the finger pointing, the shaming and the use of inflammatory words like "ashamed", "afraid" and "liar". How was that helpful or respectful? How do inaccurate assumptions about MY personal feelings make her point valid?

I'm not ashamed and to insist I must be is ludicrous. That said, it's not my job or desire to desensitize the public to the world of WLS.

I posted this in my thread but figured it was relevant here. Should we "out" all the men who use Viagra? Make them loud and proud? Maybe women who need lubricants due to menopause? Why not be proud out loud if you have a little padding in your bra or a fake breast due to breast cancer or because you were born lopsided? I know! Let's get those people who have had to have lip hair removed or women who have had hair transplants due to unfortunate baldness to let the public know, too! Plastic surgery to remove a nasty mole or fix a birth mark? Shout it out! It's the world's business, right? <eye roll>

Hahahaha! Yes, I did all that and more fat. No co morbidities but I realized my joints wouldn't last forever. I've picked up the pace a lot and the recovery time is much shorter, so I'm thrilled I made the WLS decision. I bought a tool, I am using it successfully. Hmmm... Should we "out" all the men who use Viagra? Make them loud and proud? Maybe women who need lubricants? Why not be proud out loud if you have a little padding in your bra or a fake breast due to breast cancer? I know! Let's get those people who have had to have lip hair removed or women who have had hair transplants to let the public know, too! Plastic surgery to remove a nasty mole or fix a birth defect? Shout it out! It's the world's business, right? <eye roll>

Good for you! I totally support your decision. I hope you would never attempt to shame me for making mine.

I am going to try and say only one more thing on this topic and then I am going to move on to more positive threads. I am absolutely thrilled that so many people are open about their surgery. I am excited that they are excited and that they are so willing to share. I love to see their confidence soar as the pounds drop and if they want to shout how they did it from the rooftops, I will happily hold the ladder. I am also happy and excited for those who had this procedure done and choose to share only with their loved ones or even just us here on these boards. I have always found those who are able to maintain privacy admirable and extremely trustworthy. Strength is often found in silence. Either way, the choice we make in this situation is one that is only ours to make. No one has the right to come here and make ANYONE feel bad, guilty or embarrassed about the path they are choosing. None of us should feel guilted into being an "advocate". No one should be bullied into sharing what they hold close about their health. No one should be called names or accused of being a liar. That's shameful and wrong. I love discussion, I love debate, I love a healthy exchange of ideas. What I do not love is someone coming to a support forum where feelings are fragile, emotions are running high, and some are still unsure about the choices they are making. No one deserves to have their feelings mocked or ridiculed and that is exactly what the OP has done here. It's even more appalling that the OP can be considered a "vet", someone who should understand how difficult this journey can be. I'm still floored that this topic was even started.

So making the statement that those of us who don't tell all/share all are dishonest, full of BS, ashamed, etc. is respectful? Seriously? :thud:

Absolutely.