LipstickLady

That was what my research found as well. People eating around their sleeve: grazing, eating slider foods, eating and drinking at the same time, drinking their calories... This sleeve stretching as a real, actual thing and not just a myth is news to me. Everything I'd ever read led me to believe that stretching the sleeve significantly enough to really make a difference was impossible. I am very curious to hear more about the OP's journey. What potentially caused the stretching, how significant is the stretching, and whether or not anything can be done after the fact. I consulted three surgeons before making this decision. They all had very different outlooks on things, but the one issue they agreed on is that sleeves don't stretch if they are done properly. A well cut sleeve removes the majority of the fundus (the stretchy part) and leave mostly muscle (which does not stretch). If the surgeon leave a lot of fundus, that CAN stretch, but the sleeve was not done correctly. I am almost three years out and cannot eat more than 1/2-3/4 cup at a sitting. I've not always been perfect on my plan and I've gained weight from time to time but my PORTION SIZE has never increased because I physically cannot eat more. My weight gain has always been because of carbs and grazing.

I'd tell that person to suck my butt. Do they walk to work or ride in a vehicle? After all, walking is the "old fashioned" way. Do they wash their clothes in a creek or use a washing machine? Do they take poop inside or out in the woods? Do they take medications or just let nature take its course? Diapers and tampons or rags? Let's talk about old fashioned! I could go on forever but I will stand by my original answer of SUCK IT.

The only people that know about mine are my kids and husband, my mom and dad, and a handful of besties. At almost three years out, I've never felt the need to tell anyone else. It's worked out fine. The only people who irritate the sh!t out of me are the WLS patients who make the personal decision to tell everyone and judge me for not doing so. I'm not "lying", I'm not "embarrassed", I simply don't feel it's my job to educate, advocate or teach the general population about this process. Neither choice is right or better, it's simply a choice.

I'm not a traditional fast food eater either, but I have found a few excellent options. Wendy's chili. McDonald's Egg McMuffin, remove half of the English muffin. Sonic, junior Breakfast burrito, I peel the tortilla off like a banana and throw most of it away. BK junior whopper, remove bun. Chick Filet, grilled nuggets or chicken tortilla Soup, or it's not on the menu, but you can get a small cup of their chicken salad. No bread involved. Hardee's fried chicken breath, remove the skin. KFC, same as Hardee's. Subway and Jersey Mike's will make any sub a salad. Taco Bell, bean burrito or taco al Fresca, remove most of the tortilla. Most places have a grilled chicken option and it's easy enough to remove a bun. Fries make me vomit after the third one and I no longer crave them. Don't feel pressured to buy the meal and the dollar or value menu usually has a perfect choice for me. I prefer real food, but in a pinch, there are options. Oh! My favorite quick option is WaWa gas station. They have hard boiled eggs, cheese sticks, Protein bars, Protein drinks, Jerky, nuts, all the right things for my meal plan.

I don't see any need to defend yourself because no one here is attacking or judging you. By posting on a public message board, you are going to get opinions from the ... Public. You are also going to get opinions based on what you write, and of course, you can't possibly convey everything you are doing/feeling/thinking, so the opinions you get may not reflect your true situation but I do believe those answering are trying to help, not hurt. That said, I'm not so sure you are open to the thoughts and opinions of others unless they fall in line with what you want to hear, so... Anywho... You say above you want a man who will accept your body, flaws and all, but you don't accept your body, flaws and all. When you find happiness within yourself, I suspect you will be more able to find a man you are happy with.

I eat out all the time. I usually order from the apps menu, and I usually order something with shrimp. The appetizer menu is portion friendly, and you can usually find Protein without a side of carbs. I **never** order a full meal any more as it would be a waste. If the appetizer menu is all fried crap, I will eat Soup or a side salad with a protein add on. If there really is nothing I want that's a good choice, I order a glass of "grape juice" and enjoy that instead.

Now when I was first sleeved, I did have to make myself eat. It wasn't comfortable, it made me nauseated, and I hated the feeling of being full (still do). I had to sip or Protein drink or take a shot glass of Water on a timer all day every day for about 6 weeks.

I eat when I am hungry, usually every 2-3 hours. I can only hold about 1/2 cup at a sitting if I eat real Protein, so I get hungry more often than "normal". As long as I am eating protein, not carbs, I won't gain. When I eat crap, I gain.

Yup.

You keep saying that you are not staying home. No one is telling you to stay home. Above, I even said you should date, but the pressure you are putting on yourself to find the perfect guy R.I.G.H.T. N.O.W is apparent to many of us reading this thread. I'm not sure it's so apparent to you. I truly hope you find the happiness you are so desperately seeking.

Please please...focus on getting your head where it needs to be and not looking for a boyfriend. I just don't think you are ready. We all have insecurities but if yours loom this large, you really should address that and not let them overwhelm you in situations like this. I also have loose skin but my attitude is that this is part of the package and if you don't like it, we're done. Of course I am with a man now how thinks I'm just the bees knees, wrinkled skin and all. Your attitude with drive this thing and your insecurities are overwhelming you. Dating is hard enough without dealing with these issues as well. Work on yourself my friend, and then you can work on finding a partner.So I'm supposed to wait until I get my skin taken care of? That sucks... This isn't about me being insecure about MYSELF. I'm insecure about a body issue. Me, I'm awesome. I love being me. I just hate that I have a sagging nasty mommy apron. It's awkward during sex. But I really don't want to be celibate for a year either. I just need to get over it. Just from reading this thread, you seem like you are in such a hurry to find a partner. You ARE awesome, you really don't need to rush into a relationship right now. Enjoy your new body, enjoy your children, figure out a good eating plan, date, but you really don't NEED a partner right this very minute, do you?

When someone makes a heart wrenching decision like suicide, it is THEIR decision. I know it's easier said than done, but the weight of his actions should not lie on your shoulders. You had this surgery for you, and now is the time to fulfill the advantages of that surgery. You do not need anyone but you to make this right. If you are determined, you can succeed.

As I said before, owing no explanations, it was a VERY long time before I acknowledged John's suicide--even to myself. I came back after all these years and long sessions of therapy, to get support and kinship. If you are unwilling or unable to offer that to me, let me know. Right now I am feeling so disappointed. Of course you don't owe any explanation. It's simply difficult for me to offer any advice or intelligent thoughts with two conflicting stories. I'm not sure if you had your surgery in 2011 or just recently. Clearly the details above are very different and both would require different thought processes. No judgement here, just confusion.

I'm seriously confused.

Color me confused.

costco usually has 6-8 cheese samples. That's what I call lunch.

I was taught by my grandfather to try anything, as far s food goes & never say anything negative about something you have not tried. What one might do easily with cauliflower is the topic of this thread & perhaps a positive contribution would be much more appropriate than talking 'crap'? Wait. You think I've never tried cauliflower? Uhhh...OK. I was taught by my mother not to ASSume anything about anyone and I learned from life experience that having a sense of humor is much more delightful than being a dry old bone. Despite your grandfather's advice, I stand by my opinion that cauliflower is gross.

You can throw that nasty crap in the trash. YUCK!

I ate too much.

You are absolutely adorable. Answer with a simple, "I'm sure you didn't mean to sound as rude (or offensive) as you just did." And then smile. I got all those comments, too. I truly believe most people are trying to sound supportive/complimentary and don't realize they really sound like f*ckwits. Educate them nicely.

Rice makes me vomit about 5 minutes after consumption. Booo! YAY!!

I go for sushi regularly. My favorite place makes a great sushi roll wrapped in thinly sliced cucumber and it's delicious. Even better, then make what they call Kani salad and I would guess most sushi restaurants do the same. It's the filling of the spicy crab roll, served on a bed of shredded cucumber and topped with a little tempura flake. I add sriracha mayo to mine and love it. It's light and refreshing and delish.

Some people look for a reason to be offended. Some people find nastiness where none exists. Some people love to call names, scream "BULLY!", get nasty all in the name of pointing fingers and calling out others as the villain. At times I get annoyed, but mostly it amuses me. Yes, I get annoyed at some of the "easy", "obvious" questions, especially when the poster is fishing for permission to do the wrong thing. Usually I just back out of the room, but sometimes I give them a real answer fully knowing that I am about to start some sh!t -- BUT I JUST DON'T CARE. I know that I am not doing it to start drama, to be mean, to hurt someone's itsy witsy feewings, I am just being blunt. Sometimes it's called for, sometimes I'm just a "b!tch" because someone needs to be. Eh...take it or leave me. I choose to leave many people behind -- after a poke or two.

You have a place. You have HERE. Ignore/block the people who don't like what you have to say. F'em. Don't feed the trolls, don't respond to them, they look like the big assh*le, you don't. If you are in a room like this, adults only, and they come in and have a problem with it, it's not YOUR problem.

Here was our lapdog and my oldest last night. Personal space is not her strength.