NeverBeTheSameAgain

What happened?

Well, I dont kno really because I have 2 different list...1 from the doctor and 1 from the hosp. The doc says, that full liquids include puree things such as soft eggs and mashed potatoes....BUT the hosp list reads full liquids is just that ONLY liquids. My doc says at my 2week appt. he will introduce me to soft foods which is AFTER puree, I been really hoping that Im doing the right thing. I can only get 3 spoons dwn anyway, so the rest is all liquids.

I was sleeved June 3rd, the doctor said I did excellent... even tho all I had 2 do was lay there & sleep lol Anyway, I came out went 2 recovery, then 2 ICU for 2days. I was walking in about 5 hrs. Wait! I lost 13lbs on the liquid diet & 4lbs in ICU, so I am on the losers bench now & will REMAIN there happily. Thanks 4 ur thoughts & prayers smooches

Girl, thats the hosp protocol... then I had 2 stay because my blood pressure wouldn't come down. I have a high pain tolerance so I was using the meds. They made me take the meds & once it went down I went home

I was wondering the same thing, I kept telling the doctors who kept saying it's apart of my stomach & im thinking this is TOOO high up. Ima try gasx & I will let u know If that helps

Welll guys, im up & about 2 take my antibacterial shower...lol Then I will be on my way 2 the hospital, where my NEW journey will begin. I've prayed, been prayed 4 & im ready 2 go. Keep my in ur prayers. See u on the losers bench muahhhhh

Its so sureal, all this time I did nothing about my weight but gain it & here I am layin in a hosp bed LITERALLY minutes away from changing my entire life. Wow, im finally lookin out 4 ME & it feels good

Im so excited...I already lost 13lbs last week on the liquids. This is really happening

I hope this will be the last part...lol Me: Really, u cant know who this is. Him: Yes, I do I dont giving my # 2 all kinds of women Me: Y me? Him: I dont kno, I was just lead 2. Me: um hum, game Him: no, seriously..I was walking by & I saw u, I thought she's beautiful but u looked so sad & I said 2 myself I would really like 2 make her day, so I did. Me: yea ok. So we talked for what seemed like hrs. Time flew by & it was time 2 go get my son, so I packed up my baby, got in the truck, picked up my son all while on the phone with HIM. I couldnt believe that I was talking 2 another man but his accent intrigued me & I just wanted 2 know more & more. Well, once I got home Josh was sitting on the couch in his usual spot, he asked me where I had been all day..I told him at my mom's & he said so u just dont give a damn if I dont have a way 2 get around or nothing 2 eat? I said no its not like that but in my head I was think hell no I dont care, I had reached my boiling point with him. We started a routine, as soon as I got in the house with the kids he would grab the keys from me & be gone until 2-3 in the morning, in my heart I knew we were done. While he was doing his dirt as he had been for 7yrs, I was developing a friendship with the "kroger's dude"...lol It wasnt about anything but convo, we would talk about my marriage, our kids, his baby moma & just life period. He was awesome, he was actually concerned about me & who I was, he would tell me if I ever needed 2 tlk I could call him, he would tell me how unhealthy my situation was..he never judged me for sticking around so long...he was my friend. One night, Josh called me & said that he wasnt coming home until the next day because of whatever reason he was giving, I was like ok um hum thats fine..I didnt put up a fight & ask 1000 ?'s like I normally would. My focus was changing. He said, whats wrong with u & I said nothing just used 2 ur lies & drama. He said, whatever bye. So after we hung up, I called HIM & he asked how I was doing, the usual stuff & this time I told him exactly how I felt, my marriage was over & I deserve better for me & my boys ect. He said, yea u do but u have 2 make sure that this is wht u want & ur not acting off of anger, I said, Im done. Josh came home the next morning, i grabbed the keys & left with the boys, dropped me oldest at school & this time I went 2 visit HIM. When I got there, I sat in the car for what seemed like hrs before I called 2 tell him I was outside, because I went back & forth in my head about, Im doing the same thing Josh done 2 me & so what he gets what he deserves. Finally, I called HIM & told him I was there, he came outside..we tlked for hrs, I had the baby with me & he asked could he hold him, I said yes & my baby was content in his arms. It was weird but he was. On the way 2 my son's school, I felt bad like I was taking it 2 far, Josh is my husband, what about my kids, everything was going thru my head. Once, I got home as usual Josh was out the door but he said, " I know u tlking 2 another man but u not bold enough 2 do nothing else." I looked at him & all that doubt/fear in my head went away & I was sure about my next move. The next morning Josh came home, I left & once again I went 2 see HIM...that also became apart of the routine before I knew it, we had spent a whole 30 days 2gether & it was wonderful. One saturday I came home, I handed the keys 2 Josh & he said, "im not going anywhere 2day, so lets tlk." I said, about wht? He said," the man u tlking 2" I said, I dont know what ur tlking about" He said, I see how rushed u are 2 leave every morning, how u give me the keys at night with no hesitation, how u hide ur phone now, how u smiling when u get a txt message, u in love with him?" I said, I dont know wht ur tlking about", he got up & he punched me in my stomach, he slapped me, he cursed me out, he pushed me on the floor all while the kids were right there watching, he told me 2 call him & tell him it was over or he would kill me & the boys. So because I feared what he might do, I called HIM & told him it was over & I was going 2 work it out with my husband..HE said,"Wow ok if thats what u got 2 do" then he hung up. I was crying but it was because, I felt like I was going 2 loose my best friend forever. Josh took my phone, he deleted HIS #, messages anything that came from HIM. That night I told Josh EVRYTHING, I told him that I didnt need him & he was I was worth more than what he thought, I even said, "u aint the only man that wants me"...I told him how I loved HIM..how he cared about me & didnt judge me, how he made me feel needed & wanted at the same time, how he held my hand for hrs & just listened 2 me...I know yall thinkin that was crazy because Josh was abusive but I didnt care, all those yrs that he made me feel unloved, unworthy, guilty, ugly, fat, like nobody wanted me but him, like I wasnt good enough for real love..I had 2 tell him why & I was ready for the fight that came with it...I didnt care. The rest of that night was queit, after I put the boys 2 bed & got in the bed..he came in the room & sat in a chair by the foot of the bed. I tired 2 stay awake becuase I didnt know what he was going 2 do but I couldnt & I actually slept the best I ever had in yrs...its crazy because he sat there watching me ALL night crying. Can u believe that he was crying, as if he had never done anything 2 push me 2 this, as if I hurt him, as if he was faithful all those yrs while I cheated, as if all those feeliings I felt he now feels...2 be honest with yall I hoped he felt the way I did for the past 7yrs. 3 days later, we had an eviction letter on the door..he left that morning then he called me around 11 saying he got a place...I said,"ok when can we move in"..he said, "I guess u didnt hear me, I got a place". I said, "what about the boys?" he said, "oh yall will find something soon." I know that we having problems but how could he turn his back on his son's & not care if they had a place 2 live? Although, I found out over the yrs who this man was, it still amazed me that he was done with his son's too. I called HIM as soon as Josh hung up & I explained 2 him what happened & y I called him 2 tell him it was over. He said, " u hurt me, I have feelings for u that I never felt for anybody else, I didnt kno if he hurt yall or what, I called ur phone, u didnt answer, I txted & no response, I cant believe that u hurt me"...I started 2 cry & tell him how sorry I was & that I had all of those same feelings for him, he told me 2 come see him but I couldnt go with the bruises on my arms & neck, so I said no..he told me that he needed 2 see me. So all that night I put ice on me, creams anything that would lighten up those marks..I didnt own any make up, so I couldnt use that. The next morning, I got up took my son 2 school & I went 2 see HIM. As soon as he seen me he started 2 cry which was so odd 2 me but he said, "I thought that I would never see u again, & then 2 see u with these bruises from him hurting u, & I was not there 2 protect u" then he grabbed me & hugged me, he wouldnt let go..he went 2 the back seat where the baby was & he got him out & held him so tight. This man must really love us, but I had no idea about what real love was so I didnt say anything, I didnt kno what 2 say. On March 26, 2009 I was moving out of that old apt 2 my sisters house until I could get things in order. While I was in the house, Josh came over...I didnt know he was coming, I didnt even know how he got there. He said he was coming 2 get the rest of his things, so I let him & I didnt say a word 2 him. When I was in the bathroom, getting things from under te cabinet..he came in & locked the door, he started choking me..he punched me & then he rapped me! All I could hear was my kids scratching & crying at the door..the worst part was I was on my cycle. He didnt care, when he was done he told me that I was still his wife & whenever he wanted me he could have me no matter where I'm at, then he left. I was disgusted & I didnt know what 2 do...I was confused & lost, he was crazy but I didnt know how crazy until then. I got 2 my sisters house, I moved all of my stuff in, within a few days I found a job, me & HIM were getting much closer..finally things were starting 2 look up in my life. Me & the boys were happy & safe. Josh called me one day & asked me could I help him get his lights back on because he was in the dark with no food. Keep in mind he didnt want me 2 know where he was staying, that same place he got & wouldnt let my boys come 2, I told him dont ever call me again, I know who u are & it took me a long time 2 get here but I'm here & I aint turning around. Over the next 7 months he called me EVERYDAY, asking can we fix our marriage & saying how he will never hurt me again ect. I told him no & I kept living my life. I am now in my own place, & have been for the last 4yrs...I havent broken NO lease, I am at a full time GOOD job, my lights have never been off, my kids are in a Private Christian Academy,me & HIM are 2gether, Im getting sleeved June 3rd., we are planning 2 buy a house next year...life is GOOD. Josh, has 5 kids with 4 different mothers, has a girlfriend that has miscarried 2 times, 2 babies 5 days apart by the same girl mentioned in part 3 Keisha & Keturah, he is currently cheating on his girlfriend with those same girls. He has had his clothes burned, been put in jail for assault of 1 of them, no car, no job & no contact with his kids, he doesnt call, help out NOTHING. I tlked 2 his girlfriend the other day & she stood out there while he was in jail, tlking 2 me about why he was in there BUT what stood out the most is that she defended him & said how she loved him so much & at that moment I saw what I looked like after all those yrs. & I told her I feel sorry for u...oh yea, I know u didnt read anything about a divorce but thats because for the last 4 yrs he wouldnt sign the papers because he said when he's done doing all this he is coming back 2 his family. Anyway, we will be in court getting divorced June 26th rather he shows up or not! It tookn alot 2 get 2 this point but I lived thru all of that for whatever reason & it was sad, it was hard, it hurt ect but WE MADE IT & thats all that matters. I needed 2 get this out before I started my NEW life, I didnt want 2 take this with me in the O.R. when I started this process I still carried this burden but 2day, I leave it all behind! (HIM :wub: ) (my babies )

All I can say is GOD IS ABLE, He did NOT let me die in that situation & bcuz of that I had 2 let that story go & yes I said that story cuz it aint mine no more....Im working on a NEW story & a best seller at that.

I wanna see toooooooo!!!!! Congrats good job

I have been sticking 2 it but it is truely a hard thing 2 do. What I do is when I feel like cheating I tell myself that they are going 2 open me up & close me right back up if my liver has not shrunk....& I been thru 2 much 4 that. It would be devastating 2 have 2 stay off work 2 recover from the places that they opened & STILL be fat. No no no, eating a sandwich or pizza or whatver is NOT worth that. I hope this helps

Can I eat Ramen noodles on my pre op diet, I remember the nurse saying something about them but I don't remember what she said? Of course they're closed 2day, please help

Im just like u smjuroska, I have to be in control...I was calling ppl like I worked for the doctor. Iwas having things sent 2 me & I faxed it 2 the doc cuz to me I feel like they take their time bcuz its not for them...I said hey this is life or death for me & I dont have NO time 2 waste. My good thing is, I will be sleeved monday June 3rd & I am SOOOOO ready...its been a long time coming

Idk, if this will help but try Wyler's Light packets for ur water especially the strawberry lemonade kind...it will help with the taste for ur water. As far as protein get a flavorless one & put it in the water....u have 2 work ur sleeve dont let it work u. U CAN do this!!!!

I havent had the sleeve yet BUT I registered at the hosp yes2day & they gave me a packet. So for soft foods it says 2-4 oz of soft-cooked foods every 3-4 hrs such as: fish/seafood/eggs oe egg substitute, the packet from the doc says,Pimento cheese/cooked veggies/overcooked pasta/oatmeal/ground meats with gravy or broth/& low fat casseroles. I hope that helps. Im on the 7th day of my liquid diet & I would KILL 2 have some soft fish, I will almost take some raw fish at this point...lol

See I told u, WHATEVER God gave u cant NOBDY take it....ur going to be fine! As far as the emotions go girl, u havent seen nothing till u start that liquid diet...lol be blessed

All I have 2 say is, EVEYTHING happens for a reason. I know its easier said than done but dont get caught up on what u think is negative..think about the fact that u have an approval and nobdy can take that from u. Be blessed, Im praying 4 u

What I mean by 2 part surgery is...he said that ppl as heavy as I am will get the sleeve 1st and then after losing atleast 100lbs he will go back in and give the bypass IF needed. So therefore thats 2 parts. I personally feel like I wont lose enuff weight with the sleeve...for my goal I need 2 lose 300lbs...I havent heard or read of that being done thats why I created this group.

For boyfriends as well...my boyfriend asked me could he log in to my page & tell everybody how he feels...lol I told him this is not the place to complain about ur insecurities & fears, those ppl will eat u alive if you say u dont want me to have the surgery so YOU can be comfortable...he said he will make his own site then...lol poor baby

I have to say that this is 1 of the hardest things I ever had 2 do atleast it feels that way. I am an emotional eater so usually when Im down I can cook something that makes me feel better BUT I cant do that now. I am on day 7 of a 10 day liquid diet, I feel like I went from 1000000 calories down to 200 lol anyway, I take a protein shake in the am, then wylers light in water ALL day, I eat a cream of chicken soup (like a juicy steak), when I get home I have another shake & I have a sugar free fudge popcicle then more water...then I take my shower & go 2 bed. Its easy for me 2 do this diet at work, my problem is when I am at home. You can do this tho, if I can do it ANYBODY can do it believe me!

I didnt think it would ever come 2 this & u got me thru some really rough times 2 say the least. I thought we were friends but u turned out 2 be my enemy...but like they say "keep ur friends close & ur enemies closer." It seems so hard 2 let u go but I have 2, yes I remember the times u comforted me when I was sad, angry, happy or just feeling alone. U been there thru my most darkest moments in life & at the time I THOUGHT I needed u. Sometimes u were good 2 me but most times u were bad, I didnt think I would ever feel this way about u out of everything that we've been thru, 2 be honest u got me 2 where I am 2day, I know u didnt do it alone it was alot of factors but mostly u....I know u want 2 hang out like we use 2 but we have out grown each other & although I want 2 keep a relationship with u it will NEVER be the same! So I will see u around just not as much as I use 2. Im startin my liquid diet 2day & will be sleeved June 3rd So heres 2 u FOOD from an OLD friend!!!!!

I have been in "the process" to get the sleeve since October 2012. I have done all the things that they required me to do! Now, I recieved THE call this morning that I am approved and the date they gave me is now OFFICIAL! The problem is as I waited I was so pumped and doing EVERYTHING they required but after the nurse called me I AM COMPLETELY SCARED and I said, "this is really happening". I have never been this full of emotions in my life...Im scared, im nervous, im anxious, im worried, im confused, im happy and some other things I cant even express, but WHY? I have come this far to feel like THIS, I dont get it

June 3rd at 6:30 a.m. and I am SOOOOOO ready! Congratulations 12lbs is AWESOME

I think this feels so much worst because I stopped smoking also...both cold turkey. I NEED some meat