southernsoul

This is great! My jawline/double chin issue has always driven me crazy in photos, so thanks for sharing this info! I'm off to practice my squinch!

I would agree with Merry. At 8 days out, your body is still out of whack from the surgery. You absolutely should not wait to eat until you feel "hungry", since your body may not know if it's coming or going right now. Don't worry about hitting calorie goals this soon, just focus on getting in your Water & Protein for the first couple of weeks.

What is it they say about great minds??? I almost referenced Frankl in my last post, as I also love Man's Search For Meaning. His story is incredibly moving, and his experience was the foundation of Existential Therapy, which he developed.

I'm 6 months postop & I was cleared for all foods around 8 weeks out. Since this process requires diet & behavior changes in order to be successful, I've been very slow & cautious about adding carby foods back into my diet. I still haven't tried rice, which I love (especially with gravy!). I love movie popcorn, too. I actually just tried some for the first time at the movies a couple of weeks ago. I ate maybe a half cup to a cup from my husband's bag. It went down just fine & it was delicious...and I immediately wanted more, which concerns me a little. I still worry about overdoing it, even though I know my days of eating a whole large bag by myself are over. I've had mashed potatoes, which I love even more than rice, only 3-4 times so far. Each time, I waited to taste them until after I had already eaten Protein & the vegetable on the plate. After eating the "good choice" stuff, I could only manage a very small amount of potatoes. One of the reasons I chose the sleeve was so that I wouldn't have to permanently give up any food, but I'm still working on feeling comfortable with balancing smart choices and yummy temptation.

I just read this great article about comparing ourselves to others & how damaging it can be. As we are so immersed in weight loss, it is unbelievably tempting (and almost impossible to avoid!) to compare our progress with that of others. I try really hard to stay mindful of making comparisons, but it's definitely a hard thing to do & I'm not always very successful. I need to stick this article up somewhere so I see it often! http://www.huffingtonpost.com/daniela-tempesta-lcsw/comparing-yourself_b_4441288.html?utm_hp_ref=gps-for-the-soul&ir=GPS%20for%20the%20Soul

I interpreted the article to mean that most obesity problems can be linked to self-medicating unhappiness, stress, and depression through food. Having a sense of purpose and meaning in life gives you great tools to manage those emotions, and even reduce their frequency of appearance, thus eliminating the need for self-medicating through food. Like everything, this wouldn't apply equally to everybody, but I do think it's a pretty good perspective. I definitely believe that people with meaning and purpose in their lives are happier, and I think happier people are generally healthier overall than unhappy people. But correlation is not causation, either, so who can know for sure?

These are not the words of somebody who "sucks". Please try to keep on recognizing what a great job you have done & continue to do, and be proud of yourself. Don't tear yourself down, or it will be just that much harder to believe that you deserve the good choices you're making. GG is right (cuz she smart like dat)...we can only control our own behaviors & follow the plan, and that's not the same as controlling when & how much weight comes off. Hang in there, sweetie!

I feel ya, honey. I've been going up & down the same 2 lbs for several weeks now & it's frustrating. I don't wonder so much about getting to goal, but that's mainly because I still don't have a goal number in mind. My best guess is that I have about 60 more lbs to lose, which would put me around 170. My issue is that I'm happy with where I am right now, and I think I could easily live the rest of my life at a size 16 with no problems whatsoever. You & I have talked about this before, and I think it's a damnably seductive trap for me. I'm afraid it will make me lazy or lead me to justify bad food choices. Maybe we're just so accustomed to our "fat brains" being always obsessed with food that it's hard to get into a different mindset? I know for a fact that my naturally thin mother hardly ever thinks about food or cooking or weight or size, and that has always blown my mind.

I totally get why your friend is envious, but that's her issue. You certainly don't have to make it your issue! We all compare our preop processes on this site & there are so many differences! Some are required to do 6 months, some 3 months, some don't have many preop requirements at all, and the self-pay folks usually zoom right through faster than the folks using insurance. She may be trying to hand you a big box of guilt, but you have a choice as to whether you accept it. None of us should EVER feel guilty for taking care of ourselves!

I have bad rosacea on my face & pre-WLS I didn't do much about it. I used a cream from the dermatologist, but that's about it. Now that my body is looking better, I'm willing to spend some extra $$ on skin products that will help my face look better. Thanks to another member here who is an esthetician, I got some good advice on products for skin with rosacea. I feel much better about the way my skin looks now. Also, because I was concerned about hair loss, I decided to stop blowing my curly hair straight & just try to get used to wearing it in it's naturally curly state. I know it looks bigger when it's curly, so I thought that would help hide the fallout when it started. I have invested in some pricier hair products designed for curly hair & have been pretty pleased with the results.

That's really interesting! I can definitely see how being deeply engaged in something you're passionate about could lead to weight loss, especially for somebody who tended to overeat out of boredom or unhappiness. I wonder if it also had something to do with the type & quality of the food? We eat a ton of processed foods in this country, while the regular diets in other countries are often focused more around fresh local foods.

I don't know who pinned it originally, but I hope it stays pinned. I think it's an important topic. The forums here are filled with instances of members struggling in all sorts of ways & trying to cope with anxiety, fear, doubt, and low self-esteem. Anything that might help to clarify why we sometimes sabotage ourselves and how we could stop SHOULD be kept front & center, in my opinion.

Good for you!! That's a really big moment when you make a new choice in response to the voice & it should definitely be celebrated. Go, you!!

I went back & looked at my own weight loss chart. At 2 months out I had lost 32 lbs from surgery, so I don't think your 25 lbs is in any way short of the mark. Also, I didn't start exercising (except for 30 min of walking about 4 times a week) until I was about 3 months out, so I really don't think lack of exercise makes a difference at 2 months. You are on a good track, even if it may not feel like it right now. Lots of WLS peeps struggle with carb addictions postop, so you're definitely not alone. Good for you for recognizing the dangerous behaviors & for taking steps to address it. Does your hospital have a support group you could go to? Or maybe a therapist who has experience in eating disorders? Arts137 posted a great article the other day about carbs & the effect they have on our brains. It's eye-opening! http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/290535-carbs-and-cocaine/page-2?hl=%2Bcarbs+%2Bcocaine#entry3282212

DANG!!!!!!!! Y'all are gettin' all KINDS of freaky up in here!!! Hooray for all of you....Indigo & Jane & Sophie & everybody else who's feeling free & extra frisky. Now, will somebody please play Let's Get It On?

I really enjoyed reading this & liked the way it was laid out. It's very cleverly done...thanks for sharing!

I was cleared for all exercise at 8 weeks. I also had lifting restrictions for at least the first 4 weeks, so if you're still under a lifting restriction I would say definitely don't push that. At 3 weeks out, just keep walking. You have plenty of time to work on your core...be gentle with yourself for a little longer & know that you can hit it hard later on. As far as the full feeling goes, mine has never been quite the same as it was preop. Now I know I'm full by a hiccup, if I let it go that far. Usually, I'm pretty good at estimating the amount I will be able to eat & I stop right before the hiccups would start. One thing I had to work on around 4-6 weeks was eating in a set amount of time. I had a tendency to pick at my food for 45 min or even an hour & I think that sets up sort of a grazing mentality. I started giving myself 20 min for each meal. If I hadn't finished it in 20 min, I put it away for later or threw it out. For me, this really helped get me back in the mindset of "mealtimes" instead of perpetual snack time. Good luck!

I have a hard time seeing the difference, too. I started being able to see it sometimes when I was around 70 lbs down, but I still can't see it all the time. The first time I tried to lift two 15 lb dumbbells they felt SO heavy!! I could barely get them over my head....they were shaking & I was afraid I was going to drop them & give myself a concussion. My trainer wanted me to do 15 reps & I could only manage 6 the first time. It suddenly struck me that I had already lost almost FOUR of those dumbbells (at that time). I tried to imagine walking around with 4 of those strapped to me & it blew my mind. Now I've lost almost 6 of them!

Stick some before pictures where you will see them...on the fridge, in your desk drawer, on the car visor. I just went to the gym today for the first time in 3 weeks. I've had a lot of stuff going on, but I could've/should've made a better effort. This week is my 6 month mark & I made a new side by side comparison pic over the weekend. Seeing that before once again was VERY motivating!

This week will mark 6 months since I had VSG surgery. It’s been a strange and wonderful 6 months in a lot of ways. The biggest factor that finally got me on the WLS track was my mobility. I blew out my left knee many years ago (twice, actually) and have had several surgeries. My leg is permanently bent from arthritis, and at 320 lbs I limped very badly and my mobility was extremely limited. Eventually, my right knee began to break down & last year my orthopedic surgeon told me that we needed to plan on double knee replacement surgery for this year. I knew that the longer I could hold that off, the better it would be, so I started looking into WLS instead. My ortho surgeon told me that for every 10 lbs I lose, I’ll take 40 lbs of pressure off my knees. With that kind of ratio going on, I knew I needed to do everything I could to lose weight & keep it off. I have been active on this site since last March, and I have learned many valuable things here and made some great friends. My postop experience has been really good, and I’m very thankful that I didn’t have a lot of complications. I haven’t struggled to stick to a smart eating plan, and I haven’t had any major episodes of craving or binging on carb-heavy foods. I have occasionally indulged in sweets or crunchy salty Snacks, but the volume I take in now is very small. I feel like when I give in to those temptations now, it’s more like it should have been all along…have just a little, enjoy it tremendously, have no guilt afterward, and then pick right back up with smart food choices. I don’t feel the need to stuff my face and my portions are well within a reasonable amount. On average, I eat between 800-1000 cals per day, 80-100g of Protein, 60-80g carbs, and 30-50g of fat. I feel like I have control over what I eat. There is no food that I define as something I “can’t” have, so maybe that’s part of why I don’t feel a longing for certain foods. I haven’t had soda yet, but I had pretty much stopped drinking soda more than a year before surgery. I've had a few sips of champagne twice, but that’s the only carbonated drink I've tried. I enjoy a glass of wine or a cocktail 2-3 times a month. I used to eat refined carbs, especially potatoes and bread, at every meal….and I mean literally EVERY meal. I don’t know if I've just gotten used to not having those foods on a regular basis or if my body has gotten the sugar/carb imbalance back under control, but I don’t even really miss those things. When I have indulged, it’s been only with really excellent versions…like freshly baked bread or a few bites of Pasta made from scratch at a nice restaurant. So far, I haven’t even been tempted to have plain old sandwich bread or a hamburger bun or pasta from a box. I try to keep in mind that things may change as I get farther out, so I need to remain open to changing my habits as needed. I exercise regularly, and I have been genuinely shocked to discover that I enjoy it. I focus on the positive things, and I don’t beat myself up for small stuff. I have way more good food days than bad food days. I have way more weeks where I get to the gym at least 3 times than weeks where I slack off. I am far more active in regular activities…I stroll around the mall, I walk around downtown, I walk more around my school campus, and I don’t avoid going places where I will have to walk. Six months ago, I could not stand or walk for more than a few minutes without pain. Today, my leg is still bent and I still limp a little, but it’s so much better than it was. At almost 90 lbs down, I have taken nearly 360 lbs of pressure off my knees. I can walk and stand for much longer, and I can enjoy activities for a lot longer before I start limping. Because I still need to be very careful of my knees, at the gym I focus on weight lifting and strength training instead of using the treadmill or elliptical. I love being able to see improvements every single week, either in the amount of weight I can lift or the number of reps I can do. My handicap hang tag expired about a week ago, and I felt good enough and confident enough to make the decision not to renew it. That was huge moment for me, and one I am so thankful to have achieved. In general, I’m a person who doesn't feel a lot of anxiety or worry. I was a pretty happy person preop, and I’m still a pretty happy person. I never questioned or second-guessed my decision to have surgery once I was postop, because there’s really no going back. There’s only forward, and I knew it was completely up to me to make that be good and positive or filled with doubt and self-sabotage. There are a lot of places in this world where I could receive negative messages about myself…my own head does NOT need to be one of those places. I try to treat myself the same way I think I should treat others…with respect, kindness, and the benefit of the doubt. I don’t beat myself up over stumbles and I try not to measure myself against someone else. I deserve my own best efforts, and I feel like I’ve done a pretty good job of living that philosophy over the last 6 months. Each of us has a path to travel, and I know that my experience is just that…my own experience. For me, WLS was a great decision. My ability to participate in my own life has improved dramatically, and I'm so grateful for that. I’m excited to see what the next 6 months will bring!

I'm so sorry to hear about this latest challenge. I'm pretty much in awe of you RJ, both for everything you have had to overcome and for the graciousness & strength you demonstrate here every day. I'm sending good vibes your way!

EXACTLY!!!! It's like, the stuff he used to do before we got married. I felt like an important treasure that he just HAD to have. But as bad as it sounds, if he just all the sudden starts doing this stuff again after I start loosing and turning heads...what an I suppose to think? OK, now I understand better what you meant in your original post. I agree with both you & Seela, it can be really difficult when you feel like he's paying more attention because your outside has changed. It shouldn't matter, since we're the same on the inside. Nobody should feel invisible, but the truth is that many of us do. Sometimes I wonder if I needed to feel invisible for some reason. Was I scared to be noticed too much? Why was I more comfortable in the role of the behind-the-scenes person who keeps everything clicking along for everybody else instead of being front & center in my own life? And how much of my getting upset at the hubs for paying more attention to me now is really more about my discomfort with increased attention from everybody else around me? I don't know...I don't have the answers, but it's definitely one of the head trips that a lot of us have to work through as we move along this path.

My worst postop issue was bad diarrhea for the first 6 days. It put me at greater risk for dehydration, but I managed to keep fluids going well enough that I got by. Once that eased up, I started feeling better by leaps & bounds. I was cleared for all foods at 8 weeks out, and so far I haven't come across any food that I can't tolerate or that I have trouble eating. Having said that, though, it's important for me to remember that there's a big difference between what I *can* eat & what I *should* eat. I choose to stick closely to my postop eating plan, focusing on getting 80-100g of Protein every day & keeping my carbs under about 70g. I don't eat much in the way of potatoes, sweets, bread, Pasta, or rice. When I do indulge, it's generally only a couple of bites after I've already had my protein & veggies. I'm 6 months out & I've found that my progress so far is keeping me pretty motivated to stick to smart choices.

I don't think there's anything wrong with saying "I had a weight loss surgery 4 months ago. I was afraid of it not working & afraid of being judged, so I didn't tell anybody at first. I've changed my eating & exercise habits & feel great about my decision. Thanks for noticing my efforts!" I've been a "teller" from the very beginning, but each person has to make their own choice about that. I haven't noticed people checking out my food choices in a judgmental way, but I also didn't notice people's judgments about my body when I was 320 lbs. People are gonna do what they're gonna do & I can't control that. I have had a few friends ask me about the foods I eat & if there's anything I can't have, but it seems to be more out of interested curiosity than a judgmental place. A couple have been friends who would be candidates for WLS surgery, so I definitely don't mind discussing details with them. I know I pestered the hell out of the postop folks I knew while I was making the decision to go for it.

Wow, sounds like a hell of a year! Congrats to you for getting through it all & for taking steps to make your future better.