Carlene

I like that. Makes me feel like Tinker Bell. I want a tu tu and some fairy dust for my BD.

How many people NEVER have an ethics question arise at work? Were you ever asked to "cover" for one of your men who called in sick, when you knew they weren't really sick? Did any of your men steal time from the company by sleeping on the job? Or how about those 2-3 hour "lunches"? Did you ever have knowledge of someone who scanned another employee's badge for him/her? If you EVER lied, stole, covered up the truth or failed to report any of the above, then you went against your moral values on the job. That's just ridiculous and you know it. How many? Please tell us. And please provide some documentation. Why do you people always insist on playing the rape card? VERY few abortions are performed on rape victims. Any female who presents herself to a hospital following a rape will NOT get pregnant. A D&C is routinely done, which prevents the lining of the uterus from accepting the embryo. And as for the other 99.9% of the women who have abortions, why should she NOT have to bear some responsibility for her own actions/choices? It is not up to the pharmacist to protect her from herself. So you believe that a white woman who lives in a town that hates black people should not marry a black man and voluntarily have children? Pharmacists do not become pharmacists just so they have an opportunity to make social statements regarding BC pills. Do Muslims become butchers just so they can refuse to sell pork? I was the director of a social services agency for 15 years. I had a nifty little referral book, in which was listed every conceivable type of free/low-cost assistance in the county. I even had one for the next county over. If I had a client who wanted an abortion but had no money, was I obligated to help her obtain one? This only happened once in all that time, but the client was angry in general and looking for someone to take it out on. She was also almost 6 months pregnant. She made a complaint to my bosses - an 11 member Board of Directors elected from the community (generally church members, but rarely Catholics). The board voted to support my decision. Were they wrong? Bear in mind....it is an ex-communicable offense if I actively participate in performing or securing an abortion. The personal consequences, for me, would have been devastating. The client, on the other hand, had the option of securing abortion clinic information from any number of other sources, including the phone book (and I offered to give her our yellow pages). Do you really believe I wanted to punish this woman? I respected her decision to abort her pregnancy because I did not attempt to talk her out of it. I did not quote the Bible to her, nor did I put a guilt trip (abortion is murder, you know) on the woman. PS....after she had her abortion, the woman continued to visit the agency where I worked for various and sundry types of assistance. I was cordial to her and neither her abortion nor her complaint were ever mentioned.

Just resize them in any photo editing program. If you still have trouble, e-mail them to me and I will post them for you. carlene_m@sbcglobal.net

Some of us REALLY mean it. Trust me on this.

Or two....or three. Better living thru chemistry, I always say.

We pay US wheat farmers NOT to grow wheat. Then we buy the cheap stuff from China - cheap because it is produced with child/slave labor and cheap because there is little quality control (DUH). For a nation that is supposed to be soooooo smart, we sure are a bunch of dumb asses!

Fair is fair! We showed you ours, BB.....now you have to show us yours!

My daughter was friends with "Sue's" identical twin sister! She got busted at the mall and had the foresight to give the security people a fake phone number. My daughter (who was not in possession of stolen property, but still considered an accomplice) gave them her real number, but we weren't home. Security said they needed to get hold of us. My son, age 16, asked them, "Can't I just come get her? You don't understand....my parents will KILL her if they find out."

Let's take a poll..... How many have been caught in the act by their kids/grandkids? It might be easier to ask who HASN'T, come to think of it.

Women must lose a lot of underwear via the pant leg route. Fortunately, my incident was much less embarrassing. I found my errant panties when I pulled down my jeans in the privacy of the ladies' room stall. I did once deliberately remove a pair of panties while I was out walking because they were driving me crazy. They were too big and kept bunching up in all the wrong places. So I stopped at a friend's house and asked to use her bathroom, then I pocketed the things and continued on my way - commando.

I so understand! Lucy, my dog, (DH calls her "that little ball of hate") dislikes everyone except me. I can do anything to her, but if anyone else even reaches out a hand to pet her, she snaps at them. She tolerates her groomer pretty well (none of the others we've tried....just the one). I made DH promise that if anything happens to me, he will take Lucy to Susan's. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure she'd be headed for the city pound. My logic is similar to yours. I kept my kids, and their attitudes pretty much sucked - especially my daughter, from ages 14-17. The "little ball of hate" was nothing compared to that!

Thank you, TOM. I fear this has thing has long-lasting repercussions. My DH mentioned this evening that he hopes I eventually become accepting enough of the situation to where we can socialize with Mr P and his girlfriend - who will probably be the new Mrs P in a scandalously short time. I don't see myself doing that. I am disgusted with the man (Mr P) and I have zero respect for his GF. Why would I want to have dinner with people like that? Should I grit my teeth and do it anyway, for love of my DH? He and Mr P have been friends for over 40 years. I don't want to come between them.

Jeanette... I can relate, but you need to be VERY aware of the dangers of a too-tight band. Aspiration pneumonia (from nighttime reflux) is a particularly nasty form of pneumonia that will land you in the hospital and can even lead to abscesses in your lungs. If you begin to experience shortness of breath, chills, fever, and body aches (much like a bad case of the flu) - please see your doctor immediately, even if the symptoms go away by themselves in a day or two.

I feed my dogs Bil Jac. It is expensive, but my psycho Shih Tzu, Lucy, will eat nothing else. And I do mean NOTHING - not chicken, hamburger, doggy treats, or prime rib. If their kibble were the cause of my dogs' demise and they offered me $100 each in "compensation", I would not be happy. They are purebred dogs, worth a lot more than $100, even if you consider them nothing more than property. I could not buy another Shih Tzu and Mini-Schnauzer for $200. But legally, the categorization is proper. You can buy and sell dogs and cats. That pretty much defines them as property. In my heart, though, they are children with fur.

Some of my blood work from my annual physical came back abnormal. Specifically, my SED Rate and CRP are elevated. These are very non-specific tests, as far as any definite diagnosis, but basically they mean I have some kind of infection going on at the cellular level, yes? Could be nothing.....could be the worst news I have ever had (cancer, for example), or could be anything in between. But could it be the band? I have had aspiration pneumonia in the past and take Nexium regularly, to prevent GERD. My PCP is going to re-run the labs. Assuming they are still elevated, would you suggest I have my band checked before looking elsewhere for an explanation?

I was the director of a social services office for 15 years and we had a row of sturdy but not very attractive chairs in the reception/waiting area. One day a very large lady came in and took a seat. The chair broke, with a loud "CRACK" that almost made the staff dive for the floor, thinking "drive by". Most of my clients would have threatened to sue us, but not this lady. She got up, dusted herself off, and very calmly said, "I trust that chair was broken before I sat in it." I quickly assured her that yes, I was SURE it was.

Try this on for size (no pun intended). My son-in-law, pre-marriage to my DD, zipped his business up with his pants (at my house) and finally, after trying unsuccessfully to get himself loose, pleaded with my son to "Go get your mom". He really did a thorough job of it, too. There was a good-sized chunk of his whanker sticking out of a completely zipped up, heavy duty jeans zipper. There is, incidentally, only one remedy to this situation....you have to UNZIP the thing. And I don't know about your potential mother-in-law, but I was trying too hard not to laugh to be impressed.

And hung the dress back in her closet for MONTHS, instead of sending it to the dry cleaners! See.....your mother was right. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

No, this guy was not as well known as Carlin, and he was more recent, too.

Who was the comedian who did the stand up routine about how pot users are NOT a threat to society? He said pot heads don't kill anybody. They get hungry, but before they can work up enough energy to actually drive to the store, they say "screw it, I'm tired" and then just mellow out in the corner. If a pot head does get behind the wheel, he's unlikely to kill anyone because, while he might THINK he's cruising along at 85 mph, he's actually doing 10. Edited to add.....I used to have an elderly, arthritic dog whom I loved dearly. I hated to see her suffer, but I was so reluctant to have her put down. We fixed up a makeshift "oxygen tent" for her and blew in reefer fumes to ease her pain. They should do that for humans with terminal Cancer.

And Monica didn't swallow, right?

I married very young (17), so at age 20 I was no longer a blushing bride - or so I thought. My husband was working out of town and we hadn't seen one another for about 3 weeks. I had vacation time coming and was driving down to spend it with him, in the nice motel his employer was paying for anyway. The nice motel had a pool, so I decided to buy DH one of those "new" spandex-type bathing suits. Good thing I mention it to him on the phone,though, because he informed me that he would also need an athletic supporter. Huh? "Just go to K Mart and pick one up," he said. "They're in the sporting goods section. There will be a whole display, with pictures on the box. You can't miss them." Okay.... On our lunch hour the next day, I get a much-older co-worker to go to K Mart with me. I find sporting goods, and athletic supports. Just like DH said. Mission accomplished....my co-worker wanders off to a more interesting section of the store. K Mart is, of course, a self-service store. That's why I'm there, because I don't want assistance from a sales staff. But as luck would have it, the only helpful employee in the history of K Mart has spotted me - in the sporting goods section, buying a jock strap for my husband. "Need some help?" he asks. "Uhhhh.....no." I am determined to keep my 20 year old, married woman dignity in tact. "I'm just buying one of these for my husband," I explain, as I peruse the selection. "Okay," says Mr. Friendly K Mart Employee of the Month. "We have these, and these....what size do you need?" SIZE???????????? THEY COME IN SIZES?????????? I cannot imagine myself - even in my wildest, most liberated moments - attempting to estimate the size of my husband's penis for a stranger, in the middle of K Mart, no less. Visions of holding my hands apart, like a fisherman describing the one that got away, leap to my mind's eye. Without a word, I just turn and walk away. It gets better.... The salesman then calls loudly in the direction of my departing backside, "The WAIST, lady.....what size is his waist?" I met up with my co-worker in the parking lot and made her go back into the store and purchase the offending article. When I delivered it to my husband, I informed him that in the event he EVER needed another one, he should find someone other than myself to purchase it, because I would NEVER again enter the sporting goods section at K Mart.

I forgot to write down the SED Rate, but my CRP was 5.46. I wasn't thinking of irritation from the band itself; I was thinking issues with reflux/aspiration. Could that create an underlying infection? When the nurse called, she asked me if I had a family history of autoimmune disorders. I don't. No heart disease or cancer, either. It's not related to BC. I had my uterus removed about 25 years ago.

The "service" is to be private ...closed casket and no graveside service at all. Mr P has only told about a dozen people of his wife's death. He says he will notify others after she is buried. No obit in the paper...nothing. Mrs P was a practicing Catholic, as am I, so of course I am horrified that there will be no Rosary and no funeral Mass. He says he is trying to keep the whole thing very "simple", but I call it secretive. The girlfriend, he says, is "upset" and "worried" about people's reactions, so he doesn't want anyone to attend who is unsupportive (like me). I think it's VERY bad form to take your mistress to your wife's funeral, but that's just stodgy old me.

Well of course not. TOMmy just likes to argue, don't you know? Warning labels are a GOOD thing. Except when they state the obvious - such as the admonition not to insert a heated curling Iron into a body cavity. Can you seriously imagine that anyone would EVER do that?