moonlitestarbrite

an alcoholic who has slipped should not beat him/herself up either. it is not the end of the world either. it is a sign he/she needs to take action. he/she should create a plan ASAP that actively addresses the slip so that it does not become a full blown relapse. identifying triggers, dealing with difficult situations and having a plan to course correct before its too late is imperative. relapse is like a train ride. it has a predictable route. you can get off at any stop. or you can ride it to the end. the key is learning to become aware that you have gotten on the train. eventually, you can learn to not even get on. its all about being honest and being willing to look at your choices and behavior with wide open eyes. beating yourself up and/or freaking out is not the answer.

actually there is a fair amount of research that suggest its an excellent way for humans to eat. try deep nutrition for example. good stuff.

JR, this is a pretty good post. http://kriscarr.com/blog/five-tips-for-establishing-and-maintaining-healthy-interpersonal-boundaries/

i understand that completely... but, i dont think the "article" fairly represents the book. the book is a very human journey through one woman's experience with WLS. and i think figuring out that being skinny would not make her happy was just part of the requirements of her journey. expecting one thing and getting another is part of life and not a reason in and of itself to not get this surgery. not being willing to work though that honestly might be a reason though.....

yes, it goes away. i felt this way for along time several months. had a lot of extra swelling. there was lot of scar tissue on my stomach my doc had to remove during surgery. acupuncture and lots of green tea helped me heal. now when the feeling comes back i know its gas. hang in there, healing happens in stages. it does get better.

you poor hon! how horrible that happening to you. could have been dumping, could have been dehydration. could be both together. i hope you are feeling better now and got some answers at the ER.

a very wise family therapist once told me, unless you know specifically to the contrary, assume its about power. and even then, its still probably about power. the very best way to deal with stuff like this is to focus on changing your internal reaction to him rather than trying to get him to change what he is doing. i dont mean not showing him your reaction, i mean learning how to not feel upset/tweaked/annoyed etc in response to his behavior. this defuses the power struggle and will eventually end the conflict. the same amount of energy you put into feeling upset and trying to get him to stop can be redirected internally.

people are holding this book up as one more reason WLS doesnt work. because, clearly, everyone who has the surgery is just like jan larson. now i am not saying its only a tiny number of people who are like her. because there are plenty of people who have WLS who never once look at their food/self esteem issues beforehand. but, really, instead of saying, "yeah, this horrible culture of worshipping the underweight woman leads to many many people believing that losing weight will make them happy," they say.... "see, WLS doesnt work and is bad for you." its really annoying. and dont read the article, which emphasizes only one aspect of the book, but read her book. it clearly shows that losing weight and recovery from food addiction/morbid obesity are totally different things.

sounds like lots of juicy material for you to gnaw on for the next few days...

not sure what you meant to say, but i sure got fat by overeating! even healthy food will make you fat if you eat enough of it!

guessing it's like the difference between getting a massage with a LMT and a back rub by your friend. acupuncture is probably better for systemic results rather than symptom relief. just guessing here though. i would say, try it a few times and see. certain things it works great for. other things less so. but you wont know until you try.

how is not eating grains in conflict with any post opt diet? on my paperwork it says Protein, veggies, fruit, carbs. in that order, stop eating when you are full. i am pretty full from my protein. have room for veggies sometimes. fruit almost never. carbs, never. so to fit grains into my diet, would need to skimp someplace else. i am the best expert on my health and body. my doctor is my ally, not my boss. i am in charge of my body and my medical care. i research everything, get input and make my decisions. i chose what is best for me. and yes, my doctor recommends paleo diets. i grew up eating gluten free, i taught cooking classes at two health food stores and worked as both meal planner and private chef for people on special diets. i was not fat cause i ate at mcdonalds and cheesecake factory. if you do not agree with my POV, that is fine. i personally do not blindly follow what any doctor tells me. but you should what you feel most comfortable with.

why do you feel guilty? a wise teacher once told me, " all choices are valid if you choose them with wide open eyes." meaning there is something to learn from any mindful choice, no matter hat the choice is.i did not have this surgery to feel guilty over a piece of dark chocolate or tbsp of mashed potatoes. if you are mindlessly eating, then dont feel guilty, change it!

love ursula! fav disney villain. very apropos.

just google "paleo recipes." there are tons and tons of resources out there.

no, shes saying her doc read the book, "grain brain" which says basically,that wheat is bad for everyone, and why in very scientific terms. and now he wants his patients to go wheat free. "grain brain" is about how we are all GMO wheat intolerant. http://www.amazon.com/Grain-Brain-Surprising-Sugar-Your-Killers/dp/031623480X

so aware of how difficult this time of year can be for people, who for whatever reason, cannot mindless indulge in all the holiday food. my daughter is terribly allergic to red dye. almost all holidays have goodies with red dye. so hard for a 6 year old. we have had tears several time this year. my husband is spending his first holiday season gluten free. work has been so hard for him. so much stuff he cant touch. its been a real struggle that has resulted in him over eating other things. yesterday i spent the day at my MILs, cooking and washing dishes so i didnt sit at the table and just eat all day.. like everyone else did. we need some different holiday traditions. food food food is making us all fat and sick.

the OP was about occasional back aches. for more severe pain i cannot say enough about acupuncture. it is amazing, wonderful and low cost if you can find a community acupuncture clinic by you. still cheaper than a doc and covered by many insurances.

fiddleman, my friend with a degenerative autoimmune disorder and fibro (no NSAIDs) discovered a combo of tylenol, turmeric tea, low inflammation diet and anti inflammatory juice combo really did wonders for her.

i highly recommend this. it works great. one or two cups for headaches or muscle soreness. works like a charm. (i was a motrin addict before surgery) it works so well i bought it for several people for xmas this year... people i know who either cant do NSAIDs or have chronic pain. http://m.lostrivernaturals.com/Turmeric-Vitality.html a friend of mine spent months formulating it and it tastes like chai tea, very yummy.

yeah, you need to figure out what makes sense to you! and what works best for your body and your sleeve. i feel like crap when i am in full blown ketosis (no carbs). some people swear by a keto diet, saying they feel great on it, lots of energy and very clear brain function. i am a bitch and feel sluggish and foggy. my brain needs more glucose. but thats what works FOR me. when anyone, doctor included shoves a particular eating plan at you, ( my doc recommends paleo, btw) say, "wow, that is so great you found something that makes you feel so much better. i would love to learn more about it. thanks for the info." (then smile and change the subject. lol) then, check it out. a lot of people have found they really do feel better without wheat. my husbands stepsister was talking yesterday about going wheat free yesterday. she's had stomach issues her whole adult life and just had a horrible 4 month bout of intestinal dysfunction due to overuse of antibiotics. i told her, it cant hurt to try. same for you. but, and that's a big but, you have to feel like the plan you are following makes sense for you personally.

food orgy. good term butter. honestly, i understand how this evolved in american culture. so many of us came from families that knew hunger, either in the old country or here. or both (like my dad's family) huge feasts were a sign of affluence. and for farmers, a sign that the harvest was good and people could relax for a little while until it was time to get ready for the business of animals being born and fields being tilled again. but most of us eat very well now year round, so it's become unseemly now, yk? my MIL did put out platters of fruit and fresh veggies with hummus. she's getting better. but the fact that ALL there was for the adults to do was eat.... it seems our traditions have gotten a bit shallow...

we do. everyone around us does not. my MIL is all about food food food. my husbands work is full of grandmothers baking and cooking all year round. my daughter's gymnastic gym gives out candy! as a culture we need new traditions for the holidays. esp for kids. we do games and movies or new years. we dont even Celebrate xmas... but my husbands whole family does. more than 25 years ago i went for chemical dependency training in another state. there was a guy there who was a chaplain in an eating disorders unit. he was eating a cup of nuts and seeds for lunch while the rest of the group debated for 20 min where to eat for lunch. he mumbled "they're all food addicts." i laughed, but how true his observation was.

overheard my yoga teacher talking to one of my classmates earlier this week. i know she belongs to OA (a 12 step program for food addicts). "no thank you i cant have one cookie, i am addicted to sugar and cant have even the smallest amount. then i will eat all of them!" i felt bad this person was pressuring her so hard, telling her " all things in moderation" and "one wont hurt!" i remember people tell my mom similar things when i was a child. my mom has celiacs disease.

me too! it wasnt horrible, but it was really weird not like i have been having for years. then the next 3 cycles it was clear i was probably, at 47, having fertile cycles again. way less estrogen and more progesterone in my body due to less body fat. yeah, everything is going to change. everything.