Zen

You know what you need to do so either get on board or you my really hurt yourself. If you not changing your habits I would push back surgery and get some support to get you moving in the right direction.

Congrats I so can't wait to be where you are!

I too have experienced the same treatment. My BMI is 37 and I'm 5 7 surgery date 3/18. For some strange reason I feel obligated to tell my close friends and most have been astonished. Like I said I was going to the moon to visit an alien! I guess shock and disbelief. Most said I was not big enough. I may have lost a new friend who is a vegetarian workout addict although that would not make her a friend. Luckily I had one Dr. Friend whose first response was "good for you" and my boss who likened my struggle with food to her nicotine habit. Although I've had a few positive responses most say I'm not big enough or if I'd just eat better and workout. I've resorted to telling them that I have no willpower and I will use this as a tool. I'm not sure how healthy that statement is or the fact that I have to persuade them to try on my shoes. I've decided not to tell most others until after the surgery because then I would so hope not to hear that same statement. Bottom line we are doing this for ourselves to live a longer happier life and for me to lead by example to my young children. I'm so glad I'm not alone on this journey and you all are my tribe you validate my decisions viewpoints! Rock on!

My surgery is 3/18 and my husband will take me to the hospital which is 10 min from our house. We do not have family near us and have a 3 and a 6 year old. Both girls are in full time school/daycare during the week. I was thinking of having my kids spend the first night at a friends house. After that my husband would have to be home in the afternoon and nights/ morn I'd be on my own. I think this is fine because the nurses are there. What support did you have? I would also like to hear about if you we're able to care for yourself when you got home. I want it to be as prepared as I can be and know everyone is different. Thank you and I am so grateful for this group!

I have a 6 and 3 year old and don't plan on telling them. They will be at a friends house overnight.

Thank you all. Too funny about the pants! Now I know I'm not going to get that type of advice at the dr office. . I wanted to add my mother has offered to visit from out of state when I have the surgery. I'm just not sure if it would make it more stressful.

I was wondering what belly bands you used and where did you get them. I've heard a lot of people used spanx what about a maternity band? I know my pre op apt will fill me in on some of this but thats not until the 13th. My med questions what did you take pre op and why? What did you take post op and why? If you did something for the first week then something different please explain. Multi vit, Calcium, ? What is loratap? I've heard: chewable multi vit, gas x tabs, chewable calcium with citrate, also in liquid form, maybe Iron, pain meds, stool softener, ? Pepcid (what is this for) Anti depressant how did you take it? Crushed in liquid? When can you swallow a pill? Thanks for the help! So grateful for this group!

I'm really excited and am having the "last supper" mentality! Thai iced tea! I think I'm going to miss caffeine but not as much as my belly! Will go to 1/2 caff this week and then off the following. I'm so glad my Dr office only requires a 2 day liquid diet per surgery. I feel so sorry for those struggling with that I can't imagine! I'm really looking forward to smaller boobs, butt and stomach! Not miss judging my size and clearing a table and I definitely won't miss using my arms to get out of a chair or off the ground. Bring it on I'm ready!

I just got scheduled for March 18th! I'm excited and grateful for this group.

My sister has bipolar 2 and takes a lot of meds. Her Dr and pharmacist were very helpful in determining what pills and how. Some meds can be made available in liquid form and others can be cut. She had some that could not be cut because of time release. Overall I think she managed it well. Your health professionals should be able to help you figure this out and after surgery your nurses should have in your chart what you take and when. She brought her meds with her to the hospital not sure if that was related to cost or? Good luck and good for you!

No your not selfish, codependent maybe but not selfish. We have a lot of the same struggles and I've started to realize I'm NOT the problem and I want a peaceful life for me and my kids which means no walking on eggshells. I've gotten so sick of being treated poorly that I aksed my husband to leave I'd rather go it alone and all the work with it then live like that anymore. After it sank in to him he changed overnight. He realized I was so so serious. Since then hes been being a dad and a husband, participating in the family. Although not working helping out with gripping being more appreciative. He's finally willing to go to counseling. I'm not kicking him out now but I am weary that this can last. I'm done being a doormat so time will tell. I would suggest asking for what you need now. I started going to the gym after work on Wed. Then I decided to take the rest of the evening to see friends go shopping and don't come home until after the kids are in bed. This little change showed me he is capable. I just visited a girlfriend for the weekend. He had the kids and they did great. I think their relationship is better when I'm not around and is stronger when they spend the weekend together. I think my husband is depressed and saw that I'm a whirlwind taking care of everything. I needed to give him space to be a parent. At first he may not like the idea but when I come home and see the dynamic between all of them it makes me happy. I'm less than optimistic we will last but for now it is calm and I love him. Be as prepared as you can be for your surgery have your groceries bought for after and do your research. Do what you can to make life easier with the kids. Some semi premade meals, pick out the kids outfits for the week (if you have little ones), come up with a food schedule like every Tues is Taco night, Wed spaghetti, make your kids help out. These were all my tactics I started when I was preparing to do it all on my own. Well I don't know your whole story and thanks for allowing me to share I hope it helps. Know you are worth it. Put yourself first. My Dr. Said to me "you are worth it" I said I know, she said "look at me your worth it" I felt like she looked down into my soul at that moment and it got me to think. I put everyone first and worry I'm not good enough. It makes me so mad it's a struggle everyday. Put yourself first do it for you and know the kids will be fine. Let your husband know its not ok to treat you with disrespect. You will be fine and you will be happy. If your carrying your family now you might as well be happy you deserve it!