vinesqueen

Some folks find that after banding they become cheap dates because the booze sits in the pouch longer, that or because we eat so little food that our stomach is generally empty.

A few weeks ago I got an e-mail from someone who's been courting me for a job. The e-mail wasn't good, there was a re-org and the postition was elimitated. To put it mildly, I was devistated. Devistated not only for not getting the job, but it ws a much deeper emotion than was warrented over not getting a job. I'd been putting a lot of energy into this job hunt. And i realized that what I was doing was trying to run away from the Cushing's. I was trying to do what I do so often, distract... If I could distract myself with this job, and all the responsibilities that would come with it, then maybe I could convince myself that this wasn't really going on. That I'm fat because... because I eat too much. Yeah, that's it, I eat way too much, so of course I am fat. I mean, I fill my plate when I eat, and sometimes I even go back for seconds. Never mind that my dinner plates are saucers instead of plates. A bread and butter plate is filled to the brim with dinner is a large meal. Yup, I eat way too much off those plates. I use regular dinner plates for Charger plates, and well, a real Charger is a wonder in it's hugeness. I have road rage because ... the drivers here are so stupid. It's all their fault. there is no room for error, you didn't plan to merge a mile ago, so it's all your fault I'm screaming at you. Honking my horn at you because you are too stupid to be on the roads. Don't even thing you are going to merge in front of me, and there is no way in hell I'm going to let you pull out of the parking lot. Wait your turn. Oh sure, if I got more than 4 hours of sleep at night, maybe I wouldn't be so furious over everything. Sure, that's it. It's because I can't sleep. except for when I can't wake up. Or I'm too tired to do anything. And then, of couse, ti doesn't matter how badly you drive, because I don't care. Sure, cut me off, I know you didn't mean to, sometimes you can't help it. Here, I know that spot is tough to get out of, let me wave you ahead of me. That's okay, you go first, you are probably having a tough day. I thought if I got that job, I could tell myself that it was manageable. That the tumor wasn't that big of a deal. Oh, wait. Tumor. I forgot. Okay, okay, I didn't really forget. I just wanted to forget. And isn't that the same thing? Isn't it just as good? No? Damn. So, not getting that job really made me step back and take a hard look at my life. No more trying to dstract myself. No more, if I ignore it, it has to go away. I mean, I've always gotten better, I always feel better, I always get in a better mood. Right? Don't I? Well yes, sort of. Except now the cycles are getting shorter and shorter. It used to be that I would go a long time until I finally snapped. Until I started screaming at random people, or worse yet, the people I love. What used to take months to cycle is now taking weeks. I am afraid that it will get to the point where I cycle hard within a week. Wheee! Won't that be fun?

Oh no! It sure sounds like you are too tight! If you have mobility issues, this only makes things worse. So not only are you likely too tight, you have probably irritated your stoma. The usual advice is to go on liquds for a day, and then try food, every so carefullly. Please be kind to yourself!

Yesterday I spoke with the doctor from Portland. I have a tumor. The Cushing's diagnosis is cyclical, which means that I have a lot of testing ahead of me. At this point I don't know what the plan of treatment is, or the plan of action is yet. I'm still not losing weight. I seem to have stablized at 240, which sucks. My mother's cancer surgery is scheduled for a week from Friday. I'm sort of stuck trying to figure out what to do for her for Mother's day. What the hell do you get for someone who might not live another week?

I vote a big YES to strength training. I'm in the camp of not caring what the scale says, as long as I'm fit and trim. (pfff, and I'm no where near trim ) I love food, good food is just the best, and I figure that if I burn more basal calories, then I can eat more food. The last go I had to losing weight I was working with a trainer. She was a tiny little thing. She weighed 170 pounds and was a size 12. Because she was athletic, she was perfect and well scupted. She needed to eat 2000 calories a day to be able to run and work out all day. That's how I want to be.

Nah, kill 'em with laughter! The pool needs to have some way for folks to be accomidated, it's part of the ADA. Don't be shy, ask for the help you need and deserve. Dancing is great, you can do it at whatever your fitness level is. The key is to get moving and stay moving. You might give a look at both pilaties and yoga as well. Both are well tolerated, as they can be easily adapted to folks with needs.

I do pilaties, and I love it. I espeically love the ball. It doesn' matter how flexible you start at, you will gain flexibility with both pilaties and yoga as you work them more. I have trouble with the Sun Salutation yoga postition, something about rolling down to touch the floor rilly pisses off my band... I've PB's more than once from this position. of course, your mileage may vary

Two months is not really a long time ot be on a plateau. My DH was on a long plateau, like more than 6 months before he started losing again. I won't denigh that you are not happy not losing. But I think with all the great success you've had, you expect things to continue the way they were before. I think at this point its' a good time to step back, and reassess what you are doing. Where you have been, review that list of NSVs. I think it is also time to look at your original goal. It is only a number, meaning less in and of itself. You are nowhere near being the same person you were before you started this band journey. Maybe it is time to reassess. Have your body composition measured. Have that consult with the plasitc surgeon too see how much of your excess weight is actually skin and not body fat. Please don't drive yourselves crazy with woring about 10 measily pounds. Especially when that 10 pounds might be muscle. I mean, you have all worked really hard to get where you are. Perhaps you are already "there" and don't know it. The BMI scale lies. The scales lie. And frequenly, our brains lie too. We have this idea that we will be oh so happy when we are size (insert number here) but when we reach (insert number here) we are no happier than we were when we were (insert bigger number here). Perhaps it is because I cannot lose weight that I have a different perspective. Perhaps there is somepart of me that is bitter and angry that Ya'll have had success where it is denighed to me, will be denighed to me. Oh, and Mandy is doing F.A.B.

It's funny, and like Kathy, I'm just amused at the sudden drop in weight. I dropped another 2 pounds in the last 24 hours. At this point, all I can do is laugh. That and track my symptoms. My DH was worried when he found out that I'm weighing myself everyday again. He was worried that I'd returned to my obsessing about every thing that had to do with eating or drinking. That there had to be a physical reason that I couldn' lose weight on 700 calories, that I was gaining weight on 1000 calories. But I'm at a place where I know that I have absolutely no control overy my weight. None whatsoever. I wonder if I've already counted that as an NSV, being out of control. Because, you are right. In a weird way, that is an NSV for me. I know that right now my tumor has shut off. Very dramatically, I know that it's shut off. So, I just have to keep things in perspective when it turns back on, and I gain 25 pounds in a month. Again.

Oh MelAnne, I feel your anguish, and I'm so sorry for your pain over this. This is not a diet, this is a lifestyle change. There is head work that goes into that change of perspective. Please trust me when I say that I understand your pain, you are making yourself crazy with the obsessive journaling. I say this because I drove myself crazy, obsessing over every morsel of food, every drop of liquid. You are stressing yourself out over this, and the stress you are generating actually do you more harm, generate more cortisol levels than you need. The more cortisol you have in your system, the harder it is to lose weight. Those 19 pounds you lost CERTIANLY DO count. Do not minimize that loss. It was hard faught, and you deserve to see that as a credit to yourself. One thing that I've been reading and seeing in this thread is that you are working hard. You are working out, and working it. And I have no doubt at all that your hard work is showing off in muscle mass. And guess what? That's a good thing. When you put on muscle mass, you have less fat to lose, your body becomes more efficient, more healthy, more wonderful. Did you have a body fat composition analysis done before your surgery? If you didn't, have one done as soon as you can, because I have a feeling, that as hard as you are working, it is going to have a major impact on your body compostion. A pound of muscle is not the same as a pound of fat, but the scale will claim that they are the same. Please do not compair your journy with anyone else. I know that it is a natural tendency to do so. It's what people do. How do we measure up against so-and-so? But that will make us crazy. It does make us crazy. Sweetie, you've only been banded a very short while. It is way to soon to wonder if this is going to work for you, or if you will yet again fail. I know that it is so hard for all of us, especially when every other diet failed us to stress about whether we will succed at this, or if it is yet another doomed gimic. Please also know that the RNY group support meetings are probably doing you more harm than good. This is like going to a motorcycle intrest group when your drive a sports car. Sure, they are both motor vehicle, and they both get us places, but they have little else in common. What works for the bike is useless for the car, and vise versa. No matter how hard you work that car, you will never get it to do a wheelie.

Listen to New Sho. She's right on the money. But remember, there is no "window of loss oppertunity" with the band. It's pretty cool, if you think about it. The band will be there for you, waiting for you to come back, patient and sereen. It will be ready to start working whenever you are ready, no recriminations, no accusations, no jelousy.

Hi MelAnne, Please stop torturing yourself! I don't think anyone "consistantly" loses weight, down, down, down, every week. I think, bases on what I've read from so many of our folks is that they lose for a while, then stop, then lose more. Sometimes it is a matter of letting the body catch up, some times it is a matter of the body needing to compact. Plateous happen. It is part of the normal progression. I think in some ways they are a good thing because they give us a chance to let our heads catch up to the changes of the body. Please step back and give yourself a breather. Get off the scales. Put it in the closet or under a bed, but give the scales a holiday. It isn't your friend. As for worring that the band isn't going to work for you, good grief! You are so far ahead of the curve!. I know it is driving you crazy because you had such great inital loss, and now you've gone a few days without that loss you have come to expect. Be kind to yourself. Get rid of the scales.

Well, the weirdness that is me, continues. I"ve lost 15 pound in the last two weeks. I'd like to take some of the credit, but my tumor shut off last week, rather spectacularly I might add. When Pitunia shuts down, she stops secreting cortisol. This causes a lot of other symptoms, and sudden weight loss is one of the things. And my mother is really miffed that she didn't die... Some much for the weirdness that is my mother.

YAY! smooches to Smooches!

oh Geeze! I'm so sorry Christina! I don't check the boards everyday, and so I missed this. Sending you tons of white lights! I'll light a prayer candle for you tonight too.

scales lie. Lie, lie, lie. I view them as a general guideline. But you probably have a bum scale, take it back.

I still have a cast-iron stomach.

Economic Left/Right: -6.25 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -5.13 Left there with Ghandi, Nelson Mandela and the Dalai Lama. Pretty much exactly where I thought I would be. And NO! Kathy, you are not a Neo-con!

Hello Dovie, I think just about everyone goes through the "is this the right thing?" freak-out phase before getting the band. It is, after all, a huge step. It is a radical step, and not one that is taken lightly. It could be that the surgeon's office you have chosen is not a full service clinic, and they arelly are just concerned with the surgery part, and not so much the touchy feely end of things. I really don't know. You might call and see if tere is a patient co-ordinator that you can voice your concerns with. Maybe an omsbudsman?

well, even then, I don't know that even if they give up, can they be labled as a failure? I've given up trying to lose weight. At least until after I get some kind of resolution with my tumor. I think as long as there is a band, I'm hopeful. Sure, it's not doing a whole lot of good for me right now, but there is always the future. I know that there aqre a lot of reasons people decide to put their weight loss journey on hold, sometimes our lives become so... beyond our control that we have to say "enough" and go on to something else. Be that moving one for a week, a month or a year. But that doesn't mean that we will never return. I think that is one of the beautiful things about the band.

if your pouch is still full of water, then no, probably don't drink anymore. Are you getting the slimes? can you swallow your own spit? If you can do this, I think perhaps sipping something warm might actually help. And yes, I've gotten stuck on water, so I know it hurts. In the morning, try something warm. I just worry that you will let yourself get dehydrated out of fear. Sip, sip, sip.

Wow. If you, who have had such great success are being labled as a failure, what does that make me? Sussess and failure are so subjective. What one person considers to be failure is another person's success. I'm sure there was no malice intended 'Sho. Some people simply have no clue what their words come accross as. I think because you have worked harder than most people have had to proves anything but failure. I think this opens up somethin wider though. Failure. I know that probably everyone who's gotten the band has tried everything possible to lose weight before banding, and none of those things worked. Perhaps they were worried that the bad would be yet something else that didn't work for them. Interesting though that I never get such PMs...

you poor thing! try HOT! try using a heating pad and sipping something like hot herbal tea. Cold for many of us makes us tighter, and I know that stress makes me tighter too. Sorry you had a fight, and I hope that gets better too. Be kind to yourself.

No Kathy, no slow loser for you, but I'll spot you the "stuck loser!" (((((hugs)))) Okay, you've been on a plateau for a few weeks. Really a frustrating place to be. So you've had a couple of sodas lately. So you've had some medicinal chocolate. SO WHAT! We love you anyway. Gotta get moving though. If you are at the bars, get dancing! Shake that bootie, all night long baby. As for the sodas, there is some research that diet soda contributes to obesity. I drink the occasional soda, and I do mean occasional, like maybe a bottle a month. But I only drink sodas that are sweetened with cane sugar, and don't have any high fructose corn syrup, which in my mind, is the only truely evil food. The sodas are more expensive than your typical can of coke, but it's a rare treat for me. I think everyone has those fluctuating restrictive days, and they are sure frustrating. I know that for me it is helping me understand my Cushing's, that the days I'm really restricted are the days my cortisol levels are high. (I'm such a science experiment!) I don't know how to help you ride them out, but if yyou are *too* restricted too often, I'd schedule a small unfill. So you haven't been excersizing. Get moving woman! get out side and play with those kids, make up a huge 5 gal bucket of bubbles and play with the kids. Get a giant rope and play jump rope with the neighborhood kids. Get some rollerskates, go dancing, do some yard work. Move, move, move! You don't have to "excersize" to get moving. Maybe you just need to change how you are moving. Call your local parks and rec department and see if there are any belly dancing classes in your area! I know how hard it is to be motivated when you don't *see* any movement on the scales. Are you tracking other things? I haven't seen you start your "Tattooed TX Mommy's Amazing NSV List." Please go and talk a good look at your NSVs. Perhaps you are compacting, and losing inches. We see this over and over where people will hit a plateau while their body catches up to all the rapid weight loss. Be kind to yourself. Never give up, never surrender!

Hi Caeleb, welcome to the board. Yup, this probably best belongs in General, but that's okay, it just means that fewer people will see this. So, I think you are basically asking if the band will be good as a preventative measure?That's a very interesting concept. As for your BMI, if you are banded, I would need to caution you most strongly to understand that with that low of a BMI you would mostlikely lose very, very slowely. Of course, I'm not a fan of the BMI to begin with, but that is a different story. Kind of sucks to be told "you aren't fat enough" and I think you would need to speak with a couple of qualified surgeons, or a good clinic. I think the folks I used are exceptional, but there are many exceptional clinics available. Your needs are different that someone who needs to lose weight but with no co-morbidities, different that someone who is "just fat." Even with as little weight as I've lost, I don't regret my my banding.