MichiganChic

@@Elode lookin' good, sister. No one was ever mean to me either, probably because I would never allow it, even from strangers. I always felt like I was hard to miss, lol. I'm not sure anyone is treating my any better....maybe they are. I guess I do see it a little here and there. Strangers will talk to me in stores when shopping. No one ever did that in Lane Bryant - maybe we were all miserable and invisible together in there. As for arms - brachioplasty all the way! I LOVE my new arms.

I remember this exact chart. The nuns used it to teach us nutrition as pretty little kids. But this is the chart I lived by until recently:

I blame the implementation of this USDA food pyramid. I think it's not coincidental that we started becoming more and more obese after this was implemented in the early 90's.... Oh, how I wish it were true!! Seriously, 11 servings of Pasta is how I interpreted that - and all in one day. That's more than I eat in a month. And Cookies and processed foods actually have a proud place on this chart. Ahh...the good ole days. Oh wait. Not so good. I weighed 325 pounds from that.

I lost about 60 pounds and was down from a 24/26 to about a 22 before people said anything. However, I think I must have looked different to them because I have never had so many nice compliments about my hair, lol! I had worked in the same hospital for 30 years, so I knew everyone well, and while they didn't know about my surgery, they were generally nice, supportive people. I left that job and went to a new one at 100 pounds lost, and lost the remaining roughly 50 pounds in the first 6 months. I also loved that no one there knew me as a morbidly obese person. Only 2 or 3 people ever noticed/mentioned that weight loss. I don't think it's a dramatic. However, when I see someone from my old job, they are still blown away. Lots of the time, people do not recognize me. I can go incognito in a town I've lived in my entire life.

I wasn't over 350, and I'm a few pounds away from a normal BMI, so I don't quite fit your criteria, but I think I can offer something to the conversation. My highest recorded weight was 325, and I'm short, so I do know what it's like to be super morbidly obese. I was 306 when I started the process (had lost about 75 pounds on WW 5 years before and only gained back 50 - I can't explain that!). I also felt a little discouraged that even when I had lost 100 pounds, I still had more to go. I saw people being sleeved who weighed less than me when I had lost that much! I'm not sure why, but at the time, it made me still feel like the fattest girl in the room. I have learned that it IS possible to succeed, even if we do start at a much higher weight. I think there may be more and different challenges for us. For most people, the weight comes off easiest in the early months. You have to go out of your way to not lose. The hardship comes in the fact that human beings can't usually lose more than about 120-150 pounds in a year. When you have 200 or more to lose, you quickly realize that your peers are passing you by. It took me 14 months to lose 145 pounds, and I'd still like to lose that last 10ish pounds. But I'm going to need to work really, really hard to do that because my body likes this weight. Here is another lesson I learned - I am way better off than I was, with every pound lost. I am my ONLY competitor. I see this as a competition I'm in with only myself. So, I continue to win as long as I maintain my loss. That's a hard thing to live when you are trying so hard and it feels like you will never "get there". I'm here to tell you that even though I'm "not there", I have SO ARRIVED! The moral of my story is that I was super morbidly obese for 30 years, and overweight or obese the rest of it, except for 5 minutes in the 80s. I lost a total of more than half my body weight (from highest weight) and 145 of it with the sleeve in 14 months. I've kept it of about a year and a half, and that is a fight every day. I wear a size medium top and an 8 pants. I look way younger, and feel way better than I have in years. I have my life back and it holds so much promise. So while I still wish I could lose a little more, when I look at where I started, I am better off. I had to stop comparing myself to others and start comparing me to myself to gain a true understanding of my accomplishment. The short version of all that is that you can succeed, one pound at a time, just like anyone!

I take ibuprofen every day, and have since I was 6 weeks post op.

I think you are doing all you can. I hope you can take solace in that. There is always this thing in the back of my mind that casts the blame and shame on ME that I was so obese, and that I had no one to blame except myself. Not sure why I feel the need to do that, but it might be that I was raised Catholic . Anyway, when I think about realistically, I know that is not entirely true. I got dealt a raw deal. It doesn't change anything, but I suppose it makes me feel a little better. We all have to acknowledge our part in our obesity, but there is much more at play than the obvious. I think @@CowgirlJane said it well - obesity is a disease state, and it's pretty shocking that it really didn't take anything wild to get to 300 pounds. I firmly believe that WLS surgery is not as predictable as we'd like to think. No one tells you that directly, but I suppose that where the statistics come in. One other thing - I just wanted to validate your desire for speed (like I said it wasn't fast enough for me either). I've seen articles based on studies that people who lose their weight faster do have better success because there is some gratification. That is one of the reasons WLS helps, because it does usually cause a rapid loss. For those of us with lots to lose, that honeymoon period of rapid loss just isn't long enough. I needed another two-three months of losing to get to a normal BMI, but that wasn't in the cards for me.

That's backwards. The surgery IS you doing something to better yourself. Really, some people don't really think before they speak, or maybe they just don't care.

I love this thread!! All the things people say they grew up eating is so similar. It's the average American diet. And it's interesting that the people who had access to what they wanted think that contributed to obesity, and the people who had food restricted think that contributed to obesity. I know with my own kids I tried to do thinks right. Never forced them to eat, allowed them to make choices from a good selection of foods that were good for them. Never fried food, and had well balanced meals. That was some of the time. The other part of the time I was doing weight watchers, so they did, too. Sometimes I was "eating healthy". Some of time I was on a fad diet. Then, the rest of the time life got in the way. I was so busy working and running kids and going to every school event and volunteering and going to school myself, that fast food and high calorie pasta/cheese casseroles became the norm. And let's not forget, I love to bake, so I baked a LOT. So, I'm reasonably certain my children can link all of that to their weight issues, too. When you put a lifetime of behavior into a couple of sentences, it does look like I could have done better. The truth is my mother did the best she could, and so did I love. She is a great mother despite my obesity, and I think my kids would say the same of me. Pretty sure I wouldn't change a thing Well, one thing I would change - I would eat like that and still be thin!

I am glad you want to move forward. Accept where you are and do that. It is what it is, and being pissed and feeling like you got a raw deal just won't change it. What that will do is make it HARDER than it already is. Remember, you are preaching to the choir here. We ALL got the same raw deal. Anyone who had WLS knows how hard it is to lose weight. We all know what it's like to be in your shoes. We really do. I am still so shocked that I need to eat 800-900 calories a day to lose, yet others here post the exact same thing. It's our lot in life. Some of us lose super slow even doing that. It explains how we got so fat. It's damn hard work, and it's never ending. I totally get that you want it to happen quickly. We all did. And it was not quick enough for most of us. I always thought it would be easier to stay on track as a thin person. Imagine my surprise to learn that it is not! You are among friends here. We do hear you, and want you to hear us.

I chose the sleeve because able I needed to be able to take NSAIDS, I didn't want the malabsorption, and I didn't want dumping. I wasn't diabetic and didn't comorbidities. I knew that statistically I would lose more with the bypass, but at the time I was over 300 pounds and it ALL seemed too good to be true. I figured 60% EWL would be good enough. So, fast forward 2 1/2 years, and I am happy with my decision. I lost about 90% of my excess weight, though it could be 100% if I changed my goal . My labs are normal and I don't need an excess of Vitamins to keep them there. I have never dumped or thrown up, and now I eat small normal size portions. (I do take vitamins, and I do follow the Bariatric Eating plan). I will admit there are times I wonder if I could have lost that last 5-10 pounds with the bypass, but it's a fleeting thought.

@@ShrinkingPeach did we grow up in the same house?? I grew up with everything on your list! My grandparents were southern so we had all the same stuff.

Great question, and fun to travel down memory food lane. Let's see....as a kid, whole fat cottage cheese was the "diet" food. It was good for you, so no such thing as portion control. One time we did weight watchers, and we had some sort of fried liver. Worst thing EVER. My mom mostly did know what was good for you and how to properly eat, and if we were going to watch what we ate, it was done right. However, we hardly ever did that and mostly had fast food, fried food, southern food, junk food, and it was all unlimited quantities. Ahh...the good ole' days! But one thing that really strikes me as funny is in the early 80s the big push was to eat pasta! I can remember spending hours and hours every week at the "health club" where we did lots of high impact aerobics, and the instructor would talk about how it was good for you, lol. After all, carbohydrates helped you lose weight. Oh, how I wish that were true. That was right about the time eggs were bad for you because they made your cholesterol high. Oh, and cereal was "good for you" too. And lets not forget the low fat craze of the 90s. If it said low fat on the box, we all just went ahead and had it. Low fat things that had more sugar and calories in them, and no telling what other chemicals. But that's about the same time you were supposed to be eating "whole wheat" bread, that really was never whole wheat at all! I could go on and on. Crazy to think about all that!

This has to be so frustrating for you. We all know and understand your dream, and have all "been alive but not living". I am also interested in the answers to the questions the others have posted. Until you honestly answer them, (for yourself) there is no way to know what's going on. I have learned a few things about myself along the way, and one of them is that my body is not "normal" and does not respond to diet the way I thought it should. I had to eat very little very consistently to lose the weight I lost. The minute I increased my calories even a little, I went into maintenance. I do not have room for indiscretion - it ALWAYS shows up on the scale. I have to be vigilant. It takes a lot of self-honesty from me...and I think that's the number factor to my success. So, first, I had to find out what it takes to lose weight, and second, I had to hold myself accountable to do it. I'm in no way implying you are not honest or doing what you should be, only telling you my experience. That was a bitter pill for me to swallow, and some days it's still bitter! I do think WLS can fail for a variety of reasons, and it's not always the person's fault. We all do the best we can with what we have. I would suggest making an appointment with your surgeon. Maybe he/she can offer something. I'm rooting for you! I don't think it's over for you!

I exercised religiously the first 10 months after surgery, and then became sporadic when I changed jobs. Now do very little in the way of formal exercise. I am WAY more active, though. I'm far from lazy, but I really should exercise! I am pretty weak, so I need to strength train. I also could use it for stress management, but I always find myself too busy and stressed to make time, lol. That sounds like an excuse, even to me, but it's funny that on weekends I usually do find the time to some sort of exercise. On weekdays I devote every minute from 6 am to 6-7 pm to work (from the time I get up, get ready, drive there, work all day with no break, drive home) and then I go to bed about 930...so not much time left! Maybe I should be exercising in the evenings instead of getting on the boards

I was 169 - totally went in the wrong direction!!

Vitamix. Love it.

It boils down to a few key elements-age, genetics and skin elasticity, how long you were obese, how obese you were, and how much weight you lost. Losing slowly doesn't help, and drinking Water won't impact it either. Exercise, creams, magic potions, wraps or injections will not shrink your skin. If you are lucky enough to have great genes, you might not end up with much loose skin. Either way, exercise can give you a better look. My skin has no elasticity - at all, according to my plastic surgeon. I'm 53 and was super morbidly obese a really long time. However, I did notice some mild improvements in my face and neck over time, but none in my body. It was just too far gone. My daughter who is in her 20's, lost 100 pounds recently and you can't really tell she was ever overweight. She lost most of that weight in about 6 months, and her skin was fine all throughout the loss. At the end of the day, loose skin is way better than skin filled in with lots of extra fat.

@@feedyoureye I love that your hobby is making fake meat!! I chuckled a little when I read it. I am a carnivore, so I never heard about fake meat, and that statement caught my attention. I am sure that if I were vegetarian I'd also be making fake meat @@deedeemuffin You have had a significant success, so congratulations! I'm also two and a half years out, and also not really at goal, and maintaining for well over a year. I have vacillated between trying harder to get there and being happy with where I am. It's definitely harder, the further out you are. I average about 1450 calories a day to maintain this weight, and frankly, it seems like a good weight for me, and I can't/won't eat the 900 calories/day it would require to lose more. I was fat for a reason - in addition to eating too much, my body does not want to be rail thin. So I've had to adjust my goals and my mindset. I was really determined to get to "GOAL", a somewhat arbitrary number I chose based on BMI charts. When I realized the amount of effort it would require for absolutely no improvement in any aspect of my life, I started to accept that maybe I'm good enough where I am. I haven't adjusted my ticker yet, (not sure why, I guess I haven't reached full acceptance that this is it), but I don't spend a lot of energy fretting about it. You've achieved a significant goal. You know why you are at the weight you are, as do I. You still have the power - work harder to achieve whatever weight loss goal you have, or change your goal.

I'm still here, too. Two and a half years out, maintaining for well over a year, and still so happy I had WLS. I also have had lots of plastics, and I gotta say, I'm looking and feeling better than I did in my 30s and 40s! Not so bad

It's so hard to be patient, but that's my advice. How often have you lost 6 pounds in a week? The surgery causes you to hang on to Water, so that will come off in the next couple of weeks. You have lost weight in spite of Fluid retention! We all want to lose super fast, but the reality is that fat can only be used for energy so fast. One thing to keep in mind is that you are down 6 pounds, and that is most likely permanent. Most of us couldn't say that before. Also, it's cumulative. So next week you will another pound or two, and time marches on, and before you know it, you are down a significant amount - one pound at a time. Focus on learning new habits and do yourself a favor by REALLY trying to make the new habits a way of living. As someone who is about 2.5 years post op, I can tell you that's the greatest gift you can give yourself.

@@BethinPA are you still progressing well? I sure hope so! I was scheduled for all that lipo for tomorrow, but I cancelled it. I've been too busy, and just wasn't mentally ready for all the pain and risk again. I'm a little sad because I really need it done, but I'm relieved, too. I'm also waiting for that swelling to go down in my left foot before I go disturbing more of lymphatic system! It does seem to be getting gradually better, but it is slow going, and some days it's pretty puffy. I think I'm still slightly swollen from the work I had done last August, and I am just now noticing that it's going down all the way. Here's to enjoying our summer as thin women!!

I chose "other" because I go through periods of loving it, hating it, doing it, not doing it. If time were not an issue, I'd probably be doing something physical every day. Since that's not the case, exercise is the easiest thing to let go. I stopped worrying about it so much, and I fit it in when I can. I know I should, and I also know I won't exercise religiously, so no sense in beating myself up over that, too.

Actually, I did read everything. I remember you from a couple of years ago. I know you have tried everything, and I understand you are sad and frustrated. The tracking and averaging on a monthly basis was something I hadn't done when I thought I had tried everything, and it gave me a different perspective. I haven't missed a day of tracking in almost years, yet when I did a monthly average, it painted a slightly different picture for me. Don't try it if it's not for you. What it taught me was something I already knew - it's what we do over the long haul that makes a difference. I feel bad for you. I've been where you are, before surgery. I'll stop making suggestions because it's clear that you don't need them. I'll just commiserate with you. I am in no way implying you are not doing everything right, by the book. Sadly, there is no one way to ensure success. I did weight watchers with a starting weight of 325 about 15 years before my gastric sleeve surgery. I was religious about it. I lost 50 pounds the first 6 months, lost nothing the next 6. I know what it's like to do everything by the book and not lose. I just needed a different book. I know my sweet spot is just under 900 calories/day. More than that, or less than that, and I won't lose.

@@globetrotter that's just so crappy. I have already made up my mind that if I need to, I would get RNY. I didn't want that to start with, but now that I've had the opportunity to live a normal life, I will do everything in my power to keep it. Sometimes weight loss surgery doesn't solve the physical problems like you would expect. As someone else said, there are probably more people with the same issues than we realize, but we don't see them here. One thing I would suggest if you have an open mind - try tracking your daily calories on a spread sheet and averaging that, as well as your weight for a few months. I mostly eat 1000-1100 calories a day, but loosen up a little (and sometimes a lot) on weekends. When I averaged it over a month, I realized I'm maintaining on about 1400-1450, on average. That's really not much, but higher than I thought. I also realized that it takes a lot longer to drop a few pounds now than it used to, but if I stick with, I can lose a little. In my case, I haven't been successful in keeping my intake at around 900 calories, which is what it takes for me to lose.