insubordination

Do it for you without reference to your mother whatsoever. You need looking after now and if she won't give it, give it to yourself. Your post proves that you need the band. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt and believe that she's just worried about the operation and sceptical etc. but I doubt it. I think she senses you need her approval and support, so is withholding it to have power over you. In high school, I had a best friend whose mother constantly saw her as a rival. Mother made daughter feel terrible about herself and gloated when she weighed less than her. Sometimes family doesn't do what we wish they would and believe they should. Make plans to do it without her and don't get disappointed if she doesn't deliver what you need(though I hope she may surprise you). Arrange your own ride home. Prepare your own Soup and buy all the things you need post-op. Complain to us or other friends to avoid the 'See, I told ya'. You will get your operation, get through the tough pre - op & post, get off meds and get your eating under control. It's a hard road ahead but not harder than the one behind you. Eventually, she'll probably come around.

Carole and Kadrian, your weight loss is amazing. I can't believe my eyes. Thanks for posting. Carole, I know what you mean about the struggle being a mental one. I am 9 weeks out/3rd fill and I am starting to realise that I cannot eat the quantity I want to and need to stop putting huge amounts on my plate. My eyes are 10 times the size of my stomach. I go out and just look at all the food and the menus and I know I shouldn't waste my money because I can't finish it. I also am happy to hear that you go to the gym. I have only tried walking so far as I'm not confident enough to go to a gym. Maybe that will change. It's so nice for you to almost have hit 500 and then totally go the other way. It's an amazing amount to lose in such a short time.

Outstanding achievement Chris You have inspired all of us. Give yourself a huge pat on the back.

Stef, you are a sweetheart of the highest measure. You make a lot of sense too.

Oooh, Faith. You're so close. You will achieve it this month, I'm sure.

Best of luck CrazyAce. It's sounds as though all the crazy people around you secretly love you. I wish they could hide their true feelings a bit better and help you stay calm. I predict that you'll get through the operation fine and then lose 177 pounds.

Marga, I know it's hard but you'll get there. You just need a teeny little bit of saline. Ask your doc to reconsider. On a positive note, I see your ticker. You're about to break into double digits Woohoo! It's the metric equivalent of Onederland.

I think it's not the number of fills but the amount the doc puts in. I'm lucky because by surgeon has the policy of getting people to adequate restriction asap (in 3-4 fills). Maybe your docs could be flexible in their fill policy. I can't imagine how annoying it must be. You have the band there, now you just want it to work. Hope my post doesn't seem insensitive but wanted to report on how I'm doing. Had a great weekend around a beautiful beach area and even went swimming a few times (T-shirt on still. Not that confident). I have finally got around to exercising in the past week (not like me at all). I was surprised that it wasn't horrible (outdoor walking) and that it's easier to walk around now that I'm lighter. I know I am capable of walking several hours per day. I guess I just don't want to/can't find the time usually. I guess I work too much. As I mentioned the other day, got my 3rd fill last Tuesday. To my surprise, it hasn't gone away at all. I definitely have good enough restriction (though the scales next week will be the real test). I can only eat a little bit of food. It has to be cut up and chewed over a long time (30 mins). I find that morning and evening are hard to eat but lunch is OK. I try to get most of my nutrients at lunch. I've realis/zed that there is no point eating out as I'm not going to finish it and have to chuck it in the bin. It so strange because I've realised that a lot of my life/thoughts revolve around food. I'm not physically hungry (at all) but I still look around at cafes and food courts and shops wanting to buy and eat stuff. Then I realise I can't and get a bit annoyed and disappointed. I keep putting normal sized portions onto my plate and can't finish them. Tonight I had some leftover soft eggplant (aubergine) and other vegetables. On the first bite, it became stuck. I have never had this so badly before. I was in a strange pain for 10-15 minutes and had to walk around. Warm water did not help. It only made saliva, which came up a lot. I was burping and I finally brought up a little eggplant (not painful) and then a little more 5 minutes later. It was only soft food, I don't get it. Maybe it all clumped up or something. Too slimey? I ate it yesterday without difficulty. Now I'm having a cup of tea. No dinner for me! I guess all I can do is take note of what happened and try to figure out why. Apologies for being so graphic. I now know what others are talking about when they say 'PB'. Not keen to repeat it, so will be extra-careful with food choices.

I don't like talking about this *shudder* but it's the truth. Yes, I still binge about 3 times a week (though not so far this week) but I don't swallow the food as I don't want to damage my operation. I chew it and spit in back into a bowl. I'm talking to a psychologist about it and she has instructed me to keep a journal with certain reflective questions, which I am doing. I am learning a lot about myself. I am sure that this destructive behaviour will lessen over time. I just have to figure out alternative ways to cope with my moods and emotions rather than turning to food. I've been bingeing (on and off) since before I was a teenager, so I don't expect it to change overnight. Pippz - that is an astounding loss. Congratulations!

Great posts Karen and Ruby. You have filled me with hope. April, I have no suggestions other than 3 replacement meals. No one wants to do that but it's the only thing that will get a lot of weight off quickly. It's tough but it can be achieved. Perhaps you are insulin resistant or have PCOS or thyroid difficulties. Have you had a full bloodcount done? I hope others have better suggestions and I hope you can jump this last hurdle (no need to add that it's a really ridiculous requirement). Talk to your doctor, if it's not an insurance issue, he might be willing to be flexible. In any case, don't give up. It looks as though you have lost a lot already. Keep up with the liquids and healthy meal for a while and see if you lose more.

PS Looking hot CD and happy too.

I'm sorry things aren't going well HT and jg. Without knowing the details, the only thing I can suggest is that you talk to your doctors and tell them your concerns. Don't blame yourselves. The band just isn't working yet because it's not filled enough. I guess some docs have a 'slow and steady' fill policy which can mean bandster hell for some.

Awww! Nice pic. I want to lose more weight before I post mine. It wouldn't be that noticeable yet. Am down another two and a half pounds as of today. I was very, very surprised to register a loss. That makes 36.5 (16.6kg) lost since beginning of pre-op diet. Well done me! Had my third fill today. They only put a smidgeon in this time (0.75ml). I could drink the water easily this time. They seem to think that I'm almost done or perhaps need one more small fill and I'll be done for 6 months at least. I hope so. I haven't been sliming or PBing but that's a good thing I guess. I've been trying to chew well but am still finding it hard not to drink for at least an hour after meals.

Yes Katie, emotional eating's a bitch but sometimes it feels like the only option, doesn't it? Please let us know how what the docs say. Faith, you're doing so well. With no fill yet, you'll definitely have a lot of wiggle room to get to your goal. It sounds as though you were really ready for the band. I'm not 100% sure I was ready but I'm still glad it's there. Went for a fill today and was surprised that I had lost 2.6 pounds. I was sure I had put on with my poor eating habits lately. The fill doc said I was doing great. I have revised my goal now. We still have three weeks of August left. Name...............................Starting…...Loss.......Current…....Goal….....To Go losingjusme..(Christine).........293.............9 ............. 284... ........275............9 tann.............(Tammy)...........211............ 3..............208..... ......198............10 Josette.................................322....... ....................322............307........ ...15 RidinMyHDDream.(Carol).. .....264...........................264............ 254............10 FaithMD............................... 308..........2.6............305.4....... ...299...........6.4 Elisabethsew..(Elisabeth).. ....275............................275 ...........265............10 Libra..(Angela)...................... 214...........................214.............208. ............6 glindab..................................282...... ....3.4............278.6..........265..........13. 6 Inner_me.....(Chris).............. ..295...........................295............280 ............15 waterlily1072...(Nicole)............279........... ................279............269............10 Rainer (Lorraine).....................311...........4.... ..........307.............299............8 staindgal (Bridget)..................319..........5.4....... .....313.6...........299.......... 14.6 jbtullis (Jonathan)...................317...........7...... .........310.............299............11 Insubordination.......................311......... 2.6...... ......308.4...........304............4.4

Awesome Katey! I once starved myself to a size 18 and I was so happy to put those pants on. I kept them for years hoping I'd fit into them again. It's a significant NSV for you. Suzzzie - I'm probably a size 28 too. The problem is, in Australia, they don't even sell size 28 in clothing stores. Not anywhere- they only go as high as 26 (and even 26 has only been around for 10 years). If you want larger, you'd have to go mail-order and order some tent-like floral dresses or go online and order from US sites. I don't know what really big people do here. Get their clothes made I guess. I've always been able to fit 26 on the bottom but have had to go to 'Big Men's' stores to find tops. Luckily, the men tend to leave all the girlie colours/styles for me. Even in the big men's store, I was in the maximum size (7XL) Hence the lapband. It was kind of embarrassing shopping in men's clothes at first. I'm happy I don't have to go back in there again. I'll fit size 26 on top within 6 weeks for sure. VeraThomas 50 pounds since April is nothing to be disappointed about. Not many bandsters lose that much in such a short time. I'd be over the moon with that loss. I certainly hope I reach it. I've lost 34 pounds in my first two and a half months. That's including pre-op. I'm really happy with that. Darragha - you're doing great. You must have been retaining a lot of fluid to notice it in your face already. CrazyAce - the first few days a killer but you got through them. I was on liquids for a months. I still have flashbacks. It's only temporary and you'll get through it.

People often tell me I look like Gwenyth Paltrow.....in Shallow Hal. I don't mind that fat funny movies so much. It's just typical low-brow 'humour'. What's Eating Gilbert Grape? is the one that really made me feel uncomfortable. I find that so hard to watch that movie. Hits a little to close to home.

It is evil, evil, evil. I made many such posts trying to negotiate my way out of doing it. I never stopped protesting (did you have to do it? My liver isn't enlarged.). I had a few transgressions but kept to it mostly. I tried to think about my liver etc. but eventually I just told myself that I had to suffer to earn the band. One good thing is that it so hard, it makes the post-op period easier.

Go Chris. I can't wait to see you get there. Quote: hi, insubordination... welcome, you did it perfectly! the "goal" weight is what we would like to lose for this challenge which ends 8/31. Really? Thanks for welcoming me and clearing that up. I'm revising my goal. Don't think I can lose 12 pounds in 3.5 weeks. Twoterville can wait a month or so yet. Name...............................Starting…....Current…......Goal…..........To Go losingjusme..(Christine).........293.............. 287... ..........275..................12 tann.............(Tammy)...........211............ . 211..............198....................13 Josette.................................322....... .......322..............307..................15 RidinMyHDDream.(Carol).. .....264..............264..............254........ .........10 FaithMD............................... 308..............308..............299............. .......9 Elisabethsew..(Elisabeth).. ....275....... .......275 .............265..................10 Libra..(Angela)...................... 214...........;...214..............208............ ........6 glindab..................................282...... ........278.6...........265....................13. 6 Inner_me.....(Chris).............. ..295...............295.............280........... ........15 waterlily1072...(Nicole)............279........... ....279.............269...................10 Rainer (Lorraine).....................311...............311..............299...................13 staindgal (Bridget)..................319..............316.8. ...........299.................. 17.8 jbtullis (Jonathan)...................317................317..............299...................18 Insubordination.......................311......... ......311..............306...................5

MM Well done! There are not many people who can resist their own birthday cake. You can have a piece next year. Victory is yours! I'm actually not on this no junk sojourn yet. I think I will do it and see how it goes. It's got to be easier than any pre/post-op diet.

I've only been banded about 2 months but already I can see how easy it would be to take in the same calories as before. No, you can't have a big lunch or dinner but you can supplement it with bars of chocolate, many well-chewed biscuits/cookies or ice-cream, crunchy stuff or just mushies. If you're going to start doing that all day, you'll be taking in as many calories as pre-band. Foodies can always find ways, we're really good at it. I'm trying to stop myself from going down this destructive route but it's tough when you've been emotionally over-eating all your life. I made my lunch in small containers every day this week. Today I decided to buy lunch - Japanese. I could only eat a few delicious spoonfuls before no more could go down and I was annoyed as I wanted to eat all of it like I did before. What did I do? Buy some chocolate in defiance. The kind of 'diet-defiance' we're all familar with. I couldn't have the meal I wanted but the chocolate went down without difficulty. Pre-band, I didn't think I'd do stuff like this to sabotage myself but I'm still the same person now as I was before. Soon I hope that I'll realise that I'm not doing myself any favours and I hope as the weight drops, it will spur me on so things like this occur less and less frequently.

Name...............................Starting…....Current…......Goal…..........To Go losingjusme..(Christine).........293.............. 293... ..........275..................18 tann.............(Tammy)...........211............ . 211..............198....................13 Josette.................................322....... .......322..............307..................15 RidinMyHDDream.(Carol).. .....264..............264..............254........ .........10 FaithMD............................... 308..............308..............299............. .......9 Elisabethsew..(Elisabeth).. ....275....... .......275 .............265..................10 Libra..(Angela)...................... 214...........;...214..............208............ ........6 glindab..................................282...... ........278.6...........265....................13. 6 Inner_me.....(Chris).............. ..295...............295.............280........... ........15 waterlily1072...(Nicole)............279........... ....279.............269...................10 Rainer (Lorraine).....................311...............311..............299...................13 staindgal (Bridget)..................319..............316.8. ...........299.................. 17.8 jbtullis (Jonathan)...................317................317..............299....................18 Insubordination.......................311................311.............299...................12

My two colleagues and I had to interview 8 people for a job recently (culled from 30 CVs). They were all great and in the end we just picked the person whose past work duties fit our position's duties the most closely. Less training that way. I would have been happy with any of them as most gave great interviews. It's not their fault someone applied who had done almost exactly the same job in the past. It gave me a different perspective for sure. It truly isn't personal. I use the metric system but Twoterville seems to be the goal I'm closest to at the moment. I'm 311 (I hope I'm still that. Only weigh when I go to the doc's). What do I do, just copy the table and add my stats? Do you put down just what you want to lose for the month or longer? I know you must get asked this all the time but there are 100 pages to scroll through in this thread.

I think it hurts a little more. Some non-herniated bandsters report that they are out walking the day after the op. I stayed inside for 5 days. I took 7 days off work, could have done with another one or two days as well.

Good, it's not just me. I want to blame it on PMS. It's just that the PMS seems to be for a full three and a half weeks before my period.

PS Rita, thanks for letting us know how you are. I thought you wouldn't want to read about our experiences but I guess you have to prepare yourself for when you get the band. It's odd that you've had that hernia all your life and have only know discovered it. Here's hoping that 2007 will be your band year after all. If any other rare posters are out there, let us know how you're doing. mjsafari, I'm glad you knew to get an unfill. It helps that you reported it to us. I think we can do damage if we are too tightly filled.