No game

Tough day... I know I can be all about me sometimes.. I am sorry, but I feel out of control I have self hate and want to ruin my progress with binging... Ok I'm going to clean some toilets and cheer my self up o_0

My uncomfortable Truth... I am an ugly person. I feel like I do my best somedays to hide it. Today I didn't.. I want to be good. I am a sham. I talk about being vulnerable? But the minute I open up? I feel that I'm ready to strike. I have been fighting binges the last three weeks. I win, lose.. Family! People! Me! It's too much somedays.. Now I sit here offended BUT also the offender.. Thinking to myself right now, EAT! BINGE! You have good reason! Look at that corner you are in, the one you painted yourself! You are fat, you, ugly, you are bad....

My hair for many years was my "best" feature it is also my security blanket. When it fell out after surgery, and fall out it did, Everywhere... I was a mess. I would see my reflection in the car window and want to run back in the house, there were bald spots that couldn't be avoided. I get the "hair vanity" thing is what I think saying.. But really I wrote here to tell you, I think you picture looks beautiful, you are beautiful.

Two days ago I thought I'd outsmart my nocturnal little demon.. I went to bed at 8:30 HAHA! You hungry sneak eating bastard take that!! Slept like a baby until 1:30am it woke me up saying "you can't sleep" "you can go downstairs and just drink tea" "I promise tea, that's all I want" Ha! "You lying sack of poop!" I said to it!! So I bored myself to tears (and sleep) trying to remember the name of that film starring Demi Moore the one where she was a ghost, you know the one with the pottery wheel scene... It worked! sweet sleep! Until 4:30 it said "eat food at this magical hour does not count for yesterday or today's total!" It's a sneaky nocturnal bastard...

<br> And I think a girl likes him!!!! <br> I've spotted her twice now at his side once two weeks ago she made a bee line to sit with him and chatted his eat off. <br> Then today at honor roll who's by his side chatting his ear off Sorry bout the off topic but it's monumental!

Deep cleansing breath.... In....... And out.... My first real breath today. I love you guys

My compulsive behaviors are nocturnal! I think I told you this. I will purposely stay up late to do these things (compulsively eat)

Lol,I'm glad my son doesn't have that kind because he would of learned some choice words from me very early on

Yes this is part of being vulnerable that I talked about earlier... This is a place occasionally offers a safe haven to open up on. This thread was one of them.

You are not the one that went to far... Thank you for sharing, it helped me to know that I am not alone...

At the risk of sounding like an assholED.. Yes. I found this thread really cathartic and have felt a bond that I had with some grow stronger because we opened ourselves up a bit to each other. Thank you! Will I regret writing this? Edit: I'm done I don't know...

Lol I was asking the other person. It sounds like he or she is on the wrong forum and is speaking about RNY (bypass) surgery You are still on full liquids? Most of us felt exactly the same way when on just liquids. When liquids hit the sleeved stomach they tend to empty out pretty fast. Your restriction will come into play later when you start eating purée then soft and so on. Oh and yes you will feel fullness. But perhaps not on the first weeks because your stomach is still numb that is why it's very important to measure you food.

Have you had the sleeve surgery?

Every time I logged on I just covered my eyes and said la la la la la really loud!! OMG when you guys catch up we must talk! I think I held my breath for 30 minutes while watching it. Exhale.....

Ok..... Good luck to you.

That's azz backwards... Sorry You can go for a consultation with the surgeon.

Wishing you well niki.. I am going to be sending you positive thoughts in the morning. Deep cleansing breaths......

Have you met with the surgeon yet?<br> The first thing I did was make sure my insurance covered it. THEN I met with the surgeon for a consult to discuss the different surgeries and which one would be best for me and my circumstances. This is the time you talk about these concerns afterwards if you decide you want it then you put in for approval. <br> I

He is, but sometimes the kids around him aren't.From the minute he was diagnosed, he has been a open book about it.. When he was little (5) He would tell kids I have tics.. Not the kind that bite but... Then he would go into the whole history of Tourette's. And the kids would say ok and life and play would go on. Now he's 11 and in junior high. It's not always as easy. He has two Major strikes he is gifted smart and he makes funny movements.. Oh three strikes! He has a momma that always wants to kick a kids azz if he messes with my kid:p

Hi Chris (I remember reading one of your other posts) I was a cutter when I was younger.. I did it to release the pain. This surgery will not make us happy, as a matter of fact it can mess with us a bit.. Do you have anyone you trust?

Oh satisfaction?? You know the old song? I can't get no... It's was always about filling that hole that never truly gets filled.

Not off track at all! Sometimes I've wondered if this surgery "feeds" Into my compulsiveness about food. Tracking weighing, measuring Protein, Water, timing, thinking.. I am happy for the 5:2 also #1 because I love you girls:) #2 because being a sleeve patient and the way we eat makes it like all day grazing I feel..

It's not easy. But you are so close, You've got this!

Ha! So far the ones I know are staff? Not one wants to be the bad guy on that one... Staff? Meh..

Yes I took the 100 posts out.. If I remember correctly it was brown, that came back as a vet and didn't have the hundred posts and had to keep posting to get them so she could get into the vets forum.. Alex wants your input so change what you think.. So I thought this.. "This forum is dedicated to veteran Sleevers who are one year or more post-op to discuss issues specific to those who are further along in their journey. You must be one year out to create topics or post here."