I'm not sure if he is over weight too, but if he is maybe encourage him to make a good choice to follow in your footsteps to better health. Maybe that will help with his fears. But on another note, you have to lay some ground rules, or he will continue to bring you down. If your are the independant women that you state, you should have no problem doing this. Ignoring his comments will only get you so far trust me, been there done that. In my current relationship, he was not very supporting of my choice for the sleeve, but what I said was I doing this with or without your support. I want to be around for my children and him, but if this chance is too much for you then there is the door, because I am gonna make it with or without you! I really meant what I said, and now I have his support. I also told him what I expect from him once I am post op. You need to have your head your head in the game of losing, and you can't completely do this with someone close to your heart steeping on you out the gate! Good Luck to you and hope everything works out for the best!!